Hate something
Change something. Hate something, change something, make something betterrrrrrrr....

Earworm and a delightfully bizarre ad for Honda engines.
( Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 14:25, 2 replies)

!!!!!!!!!
How did this ad ever get made?? What were they thinking??

www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBXXtvyZaVY
(the_icks has the sweet essence of giraffe, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 14:22, 2 replies)

Altogether now....
"The red car and the blue car had a race,
all red wants to do is stuff his face.
He eats everything he sees,
from trucks to prickly trees,
but smart old blue he took the milky way.

He’s looking for a chocolate treat,
fluffy and light,
cos he knows it won’t spoil his app-e-tite, mm mm MMMM!

Oh no! the bridge has gone, old red can’t carry on,
but smart old blue, he took the milky way"

*spluffs*
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 14:14, 1 reply)

My submission for best advert song
Noodle Doodle went to town
with lots of straight spaghetti,
twisted it around and round
and this is what you getty

Noodle doodle noodle doodle motor cars,
Noodle doodle noodle doodle houses,
Noodle doodle noodle doodle butterflies,
EEK!, Noodle Doodle mouses.
(NoveltyCondomHead Clanks Wams., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 14:06, 5 replies)

JML
Not so much a love/hate scenario but more my own idea for a series of adverts for JML. We've all seen that twat who used to be on My Family having his life mundanely improved by each new BT Product. As rubbish as they are, the formula is perfect for JML's array of wonder products.

I want to see an advert where a man's life is going to shit until he gets a JML wonder mop. I want to see an advert where some bint courts a man using her JML Kevlar Oven Gloves. You get the idea.

Make it happen JML!
(rich.cicatriz should be doing something more constructive on, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 14:06, Reply)

VW
VW rarely fuck up with adverts. This one is brilliant: www.youtube.com/watch?v=WAbSNsTVKZ8
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 14:05, 2 replies)

Advert order is important.
Until recently we had Sky+, and anything else was BBC anyway. So it's been a very long time since I've been exposed to adverts properly.

So last night after sitting down for 90 minutes then finally seeing some adverts, I came away with a strange urge to vote Lib Dem, eat Warbutons Bread, Bakers' dog food and Rice Crispies and then wash it down with some Rennie.
(mmmm curry doesn't really understand this sig lark, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:56, Reply)

Honda Ad
I love the Honda Ad where the guy drives various vehicles across the country side with Andy Williams singing in the background, its just a brilliant feelgood ad!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIq1d_CxNzA
(Jimmy Large Is huffing Jenkem on, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:55, 2 replies)

John Carpenter's The Dog
In 2003 Wrigley's had an advert for that played on the horror of waking up after a party with a mouth like the floor of a taxi cab. The Marketing People behind this one labelled the awful predicament as "dog breath", visualising it as a man retching, followed by a grumpy grey dog emerging hideously from his mouth and growling at him accusingly. It was a shocking and frankly brilliant interpretation of the feeling of the urgent need to gargle an entire bottle of mouthwash to avoid choking on one's own miasmatic tongue.

However, 540 viewers (of ... I don't know ... millions?) didn't see it this way, and complained to the ITC: news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/2848249.stm

Yes, it was a bit extreme. But there was no foul language, cruelty, violence, smoking etc etc. I couldn't normally care less about adverts, but this one was impressive in its imagination. Should 540 people be able to influence what millions can and cannot view? Apparently so. But, if (in this case) I could have recruited 540 other people to counter complain to the ITC (or OfCom now) about removing a challenging but creatively inspired advert and insisting on a full reinstatement ... no, of course not. They wouldn't have.

This isn't about authoritative censorship ... I'm guessing that, had no one complained, the advert would have run it's course with no ITC involvement. It's about a tiny, tiny minority being pandered to. So if it happens again, I might just start a recruitment drive ...
( The Vomiting Hitchhiker Mephistopheles is such a mouthful in Manhattan, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:45, 3 replies)

"You'll never forget your first Dime bar"
"You'll never forget your first Dime bar"

I hated that ad. I remember as a kid watching that ad and freaking out because I hadn't yet had a Dime bar and I knew that if I then had one, because some advertising twat made up a throwaway slogan, I would remember that experience for the rest of my life. It's only a chocolate bar for fucks sake and I would probably have had one anyway, but now I would be in danger of being bugged for the rest of my life by the knowledge that I can't forget something just because someone said it on an advert. I hate my mind sometimes.

So, because I knew it would bug me forever, until the day I die, and would probably be the last thing I think of on my death bed, I resolved never to eat one.

I told this to my girlfriend a few months back and she offered to feed me my first Dime bar in a way that I would want to remember.

Now I have that image in my mind, I really really a Dime bar. She hasn't delivered yet, despite me pestering...
(the itch Forsooth! What fryeth fryar?, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:42, 5 replies)

Calling all furries!
The Orangina advert. It makes me never want to touch Orangina again for fear that it is laced with multiple species' semen.

Anthropomorphic sexualised animals mimicking American Beauty and Flashdance wasn't saucy enough. They had to add pole dancing flamingoes, a bear in a Speedo, Bambi's girlfriend after the implant surgery and even a sexy hentai Octopus thrown in there for good measure. It's like Avatar if Jenna Jameson got to it first.

Seriously, that is one fucked up advert and I'm not still sure what kind of reaction they were going for. I know sex sells, but I didn't think that specifically included sex with zebras.

You can find it here if you really, really want to.

For fuck's sake, even the flowers are doing the Lambada.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:41, 9 replies)

I've had "They're gonna taste great" as my ringtone
for four years now. It's worth it to see the horror on people's faces every time someone rings.

(For those of you with lives unsoiled by the ad in question, have a link: www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUKSxsxeBK4)
( Pretender, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:36, 1 reply)

Who else dreamt of being...
The Milky Bar Kid?
Pockets full of chocolate, small kids vying to be your friend. He even got to ride a horse!
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:34, 3 replies)

Crusha Milkshake
I likes the cats. They remind me of lolcats. They make me smile.
( awayfromthenumbers, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:34, Reply)

Gondry - Levi's
No one does video better than Michel Gondry. You might remember his Levi's ad. It's unbelievable on every level, especially the cinematography. It's damned near perfect.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uj6G1C6c0uw&feature=related
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:30, Reply)

Mitchell and Webb
Mac and PC- cringeworthy awkward ads- why did you do it guys? :-(
( awayfromthenumbers, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:30, 6 replies)

Howard from Halifax
No no no. He even went animated.
( awayfromthenumbers, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:29, 2 replies)

I liked it so much I bought the company.
This slogan changed ads for ever. It's not particularly good or funny, but Victor put his ultimate faith in the product. Who wouldn't want a Remington after that? See, I even remember the brand. THAT'S good advertising!
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:29, Reply)

Our Son Pat...
Is a bit nifty, with a bat.
He can run, in a circle,
As fast as a cat.
And when he feeling peckish,
he takes off his hat.
'cause with 93% peanuts,
he like a bit o' this,
he like a bit o' that.
Sun packed, fun packed,
our son Pat.
SMASH!!!
I'll kill 'im when I get me hands on 'im!
(Dr Fishfinger Want's to see a fat man give a tit wank, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:25, Reply)

oh dear
www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-_ipSXgujk
(Lord Chode, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:24, 3 replies)

Drink driving ditty
I liked this one, especially when the kids and old lady join in.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jkz12OslGhU

At the moment, I particularly hate that one for Glade with the pebble.
If I invited my friends over to look at my pebble collection, they'd not come and they certainly wouldn't laugh if one of my pebbles was an air freshener. In fact, they probably wouldn't visit me at the Day Centre ever again.

And does anyone remember the Bold 2in1 infusions adverts (might still be on actually)? You just don't see glamorous women sniffing their fingers outside the jewellery shop being intoxicated by the scent of white diamonds do you? Because diamonds don’t have a smell and nor do amethysts or rubies. So whattheshittingwellballs is Bold on about? Are they referring to the alluring fragrance of a defunct and crumbling Koidu diamond mine? Or the sweat of a thousand Sierra Leonese labourers toiling amid civil war and poverty to furnish the digits of the Western rich with spangly gems? If that’s what the ‘kind of woman who loves to be seduced’ wants to smell of, it’s no wonder she spends her evenings rolling around in piles of washing at cheap hotels, like a big grubby Labrador that’s found a pile of sick to play with. So there.
(dancebiscuits, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:20, 5 replies)

Once upon a time...
when I was a young lad, I was roaming around Northampton town centre. Me and a friend, Sean, were doing the usual pastimes of chasing the deformed pigeons, eating McDonalds and slowly bankrupting Woolworths with our slow burning Pic n Mix heist.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, strangers offering sweets approached us. After working out their intentions weren't to kidnap us, we discovered that they were filming an advert for the 'NEW IMPROVED' Lion bars. Which, were my favourite chocolate bar. I've always been fond of really chewy, sticky chocolate, so even hours after it's been eaten, you can still find bits of nougat in your teeth to prolong the chocolatey goodness. Lion bars are king of this category.

So, after loading our pockets full of mini Lion bars, as bribery for our cooperation, they told us to get in the van asked if we could say it's really nice and so much better than before. For all we could tell, it tasted exactly the fucking same, but with the potential of getting given more chocolate from these generous strangers we threw ourselves into our new found roles as advertising masterminds.

Minds ready, we stood there, in front of the cameras and a now gathering audience of Market Square shoppers already planning our ascent to stardom... This advert was a platform to Hollywood. And then, just as they start the countdown, with a final mouthful of Lion bar getting chomped down, Sean whispers to me, in a voice only loud enough for me to hear...

"tastes like shit, doesn't it?"

And of course, being a young adolescent, this was the wittiest thing I had ever heard. Cue me breaking down into tears of laughter, whilst drooling chocolate over the giant microphone stuck under our noses, trying to force out "Ttthhhee nooo LLjjion burr isshhhh weealy vewy niccsshh" through my stuffed gob. Must have thought I was mental.

Surprisingly, we didn't make the final cut. It was a bunch of clean cut Northamptonians who could speak without dribbling brown. Squares.

That's the closest I've ever come to being in an advert. Also, one of my mates was on the back of an action man box when he was little.

And if this doesn't suffice, the old Honda advert that was like awesome Mousetrap was the best advert on TV
( the pink chicken sniffer sniffs pink chickens., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:13, 7 replies)

As someone said earlier...
Vic and Bob... Clio Ad..

www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwqEpwO-5PE
(Code of Post lives at the moment in time that is..., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 12:58, Reply)

Theeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyre...

tasty, tasty, very very tasty

www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAkKe6xjM-M&feature=related

Er-no they aint..and that god awful song is now in my head!
Gash.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 12:45, 1 reply)

Ribenaberries.
Lots of animated blackcurrent berries drinking blackcurrent juice. Little more than a Ribena version of Cannibal Holocaust.
(Cameltoad, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 12:39, Reply)

Used to love these!

Smash alien mash up!!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SAbJjktk7E
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 12:39, Reply)

Oh yeah..
www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-W_jQGSk7o
(Plumstix has been spying on you since, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 12:27, Reply)

That fucking yoghurt advert...
..With some french bird going "I used to eat sour yoghurt"..She then eats mouthful after mouthful of yoghurt, scowling each time she tastes it. STOP FUCKING EATING IT THEN YOU DUMB CUNT!!

& it's the way that she giggles after screwing up her face. It reminds me of a chimp in a zoo eating it's own shit to show off.

AAARGH!
( Kung_Fu_Russ ran out of amusing signatures on, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 12:22, 3 replies)

Anyone remember the Dove shower gel advert where you could see the woman's nipple?
I saw it one night and was amazed that it had been allowed on our nanny-state TV. Later on I mentioned it to my then girlfriend, who didn't believe me. A couple of days later it was on again and I waited to be proved right... and was proved wrong.

Turns out there were two versions; one for post 9pm and a cut one for earlier. She eventually saw the other version and my reputation was once more intact, but whenever I mention it now (which isn't often, to be honest) I'm told I must have imagined it.

Someone please tell me they saw it too!
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 12:19, 7 replies)

Calm down dear.
I want to rip my own fingers off for typing that.
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 12:08, 4 replies)