Tenuious Link
My cousin's band's keyboard player left Wheatus to play with them...

still waiting for them to become famous so I can tout that a bit more.
(Sup3rSox, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 21:15, Reply)

Random stuff
I was on University Challenge. Looked incredibly smug. Heard Paxo tell a member of another team to "fuck off" after he slagged off a book that Paxo had written, then asked him to sign it. Well, hardly surprising, is it?

[edit] I was on the Xfm breakfast show a few weeks ago. I came second in a quiz to select someone to join them on an Eggheads TV quiz show team. Still, got a radio and a cuddly toy, so wasn't too bad.

One of my ancestors was in the same regiment as that which was at the Battle of Rourke's Drift (as in the film Zulu), joining it a year or two afterwards, so he would have known some of the surviviors. He was also one of the best shots in the army. I have the proof.

[edit] Another connection with that film is that I went to the same school as Michael Caine. Also have the same birthday as him.

My Nan made Cadbury's chocolate for a living.

[edit] Rob Newman knows me. Vaguely. He owes me a pint, as it happens.

[edit] I made Mark Thomas laugh when we met at a demonstration.

I've been published twice. Well, two and a half, I suppose, if you count another thing I did. Should be published four times within a few months.

I was almost knocked unconcious by Windsor Davies' grandson, who was, most certainly not "a lovely boy". Nutcase, he was. Absolute nutcase.

I had a very rare medicical condition last year. Deeply unpleasant.

I have another very rare medicical condition now. Annoying.

[edit] Had dinner with Christopher Timothy. Also met Bill Oddie, Chris Packham, Terry Nutkins and a pile of other celebs at the same time.

[edit] Walked into some Big Brother infra-celeb. Had to be told who it was. Didn't give a toss anyway.

[edit] Walked for the first time on a beach on the Belgian coast in the presence of Sir Jimmy Saville. Beat that!

[edit] I won a letter writing competition organised by the Post Office when I was a kid. Also won a Lego Club competition.

[edit] Once gave directions to the Archbishop of York. I was at university. He asked where the Porters Lodge was. He was about five metres away from it. Durrrrr.

[edit] Had dinner at a conference next to the former head of the RSPB (Royal Society for the Preservation of Birds). Top chap, BTW.

[edit] Won a national competition twice and came second once when I was 10-13. Can't say which, but I've still got it on my CV!

Damn, I think I've gone and revealed my secret identity now. Sod it.
( Parmesan Quality b4 Quantity, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 21:11, Reply)

I was Spiderman
on the local news during Halloween. I was buying a pirate costume at a costume shop, and the lady said I looked like Toby Mcguire, so they asked me to dress like spiderman and act like an ass on the news. It was fun, my nephew said I looked gay.
(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 20:36, Reply)

bumwine.com
"COMING SOON: BUCKFAST"

My suggestion.
( helmetcream, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 20:30, Reply)

Several
I once told Jackie Bird where to park her car when she came to talk to my school.

Once when I was but a young one, I ran headfirst into Dougie Donnelly's stomach (sports pundit and Reid furniture lackey) and winded him.

At the Killer's first Glasgow gig supporting Stellastarr I was standing chatting to the drummer. this guy came up to join in, I looked at him and turned away. When he realised I was ignoring him he walked away. Was only when he'd buggered off I realised he was the bloody singer...
( Fudgebags will wear you like a glove, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 20:24, Reply)

"the *real* lady macbeth"?
Who the fuck are you, Hamlet?
( Laughing Boy, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 20:16, Reply)

Claim to Fame
My bro is fcukin ABI TITMUS!!!!!!11
No joke!! (This - true - story got me several pints bought the day I got his txt, what would I do without u dear brother?)
( Pointy Head poked another hole in my anorak on, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 20:02, Reply)

Papers to royalty
Me and my dad used to deliver newspapers for the family business to Princess Anne's estate in Gloucestershire.

One time my uncle delivered said papers, and when asked what he had in the back of the van is quoted as saying "3 members of the IRA and 200lbs of c4."
The police dismantled the car infront of him, so my claim is .....
Princess Anne's Policemen dismantled our families newspaper van.
(bazmataz, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 19:29, Reply)

I have no idea what it is
but my uncle invented the pop rivet, he was working for a company at the time so they got all the glory, shame really.
( flurokitty 3, 2, 1 lets jam! (+.[___]·:·), Sat 26 Feb 2005, 19:24, Reply)

me mam
used to go to the same school as freddy mercuary
(spike4848, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 19:24, Reply)

Lovejoy
I was also in an episode of Lovejoy that has just
been released on DVD, you can see my silhouette running around behind a hedge
(Bee in a cage, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 19:17, Reply)

My many, many claims....don't get excited!
My Great, Great Grandfather was Prime Minister of New Zealand for 6 months in 1912 before falling off the perch.

I used to go to school with Peter Beardsley's sons.

Richard Gere held the door open for me at the Dorchester Hotel. (I was taking his producer out on a wheelchair at the time.) Oooh....I would!

I have been on Trauma and City Hospital a few times, much to my mother's happiness.

I won a load of CDs on Virgin Radio about 3 months ago, which never arrived thanks to our theiving gypsy bastard postmen.

Last week I was sitting at a table next to the lead singer from Keane in the Astoria.

I have met Will Young. Sadly.

My mum got through to the final of the Mr Motivator Challenge about 10 years ago, and came 3rd!

Last year when flying to New Zealand, I was standing next to Jonathon Ross at the baggage carousel at LAX airport. Started chatting away about the fact that how come you can get off a plane in 10 minutes after landing, yet it takes hours for you baggage to get to the same place. Nice bloke.
( Undercovercarrot got done for gross misconduct on..., Sat 26 Feb 2005, 19:16, Reply)

Big Brother
Last week I got a blow job from an ex big brother contestant who has her own radio show (it's the highest rating regional show in the country)
(Bee in a cage, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 19:15, Reply)

Pff Bollocks to all this direct descendants crap

I've met the chuckle brothers twice and called Mr. Motivator a cunt
(smoglane!, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 19:12, Reply)

I've got oodles of family based claims to fame, lets see.
-My great great uncle was prime minister of germany, won a nobel peace prize for getting germany out of the depression, then he lost the job in the next election to hitler, who used my great great uncle's jewishnes against him in his campaign.
-Another great uncle of mine was Paul Erlich, who invented the basics of chemotherapy back in the late 19th century
-I'm a direct decendant of king david who killed goliath
-My grandparents on my dads side were helped out of germany by schindler out of Schindler's List.
-My grandad, Leopold Samson (who i get my name from) invented putting chloring in swimming pools.
-My great grandad invented Ultrasound.
-My great uncle invented some fancy gynacological technique that won him a nobel prize.
-If my great great grandad had been the firstborn son instead of the second, i would be a count.

Thats all i can think of for now, oh, and once i won the egg toss at Banstead fete and got in the local paper.
( Yeknom. Incontinence and Premature ejaculation? Easy come, easy go., Sat 26 Feb 2005, 19:02, Reply)

Stilleto heel problem
I tripped and almost fell in Princess Margaret's lap. Have never worn high heels since.
(altobunny likes orange cats, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 18:16, Reply)

My claims to fame...
some choice selections.....


- I'm a direct descendent (on my Mother's side), from the *real* Lady Macbeth.

- my Dad's the one handing out wardrobe costumes in a theatre scene with Summer Pheonix in the movie "Esther Khan".

- my Dad drives cars to and from locations for the telly series "The Bill" (including some of the police cars).

- last year my husband (who's posted elsewhere in this thread) and I lent our voices to the 500 strong choir that recorded a specially composed 'hymn' for the upcoming "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" movie - and when I got (Director) Garth Jennings' autograph afterwards he told me that no one had asked him for his autograph before (ahhh).

- I've been kissed on the cheek by actor Terry Molloy who used to be Davros in "Doctor Who"

- I was working in the House of Commons on the day Mrs Thatcher resigned.

- the late John Smith (Labour Party leader before he died and Blair took over) once held a door open for me.

- Earl Attlee (the late son of former Prime Minister Clement Attlee) gave me a gift of two engraved House of Lords wine glasses at a work Christmas party in the House of Lords. (I still have them).
(DalekWidow, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 18:08, Reply)

FUCK YEAH (and I apologise for the length of the post above)
Right

I met The White Stripes on my stag night, I got a kiss from Meg, and shook Jacks hand and THE FUCKING LOT MAN.

My mate got Jack to sign his Travel Card then stuck it in the underground machine 'cause he was drunk and confused and he never got it back and he cried HA HA HA HA

and me other mate couldn't go 'cause he was unclean.

(Starzy I know you're reading this, but it was your own fault for getting leprosy a month before I got married or something)

My old man once met John Lennon, and Stu Suttclife was a friend of the family before he got leprosy and snuffed it.

I served Roy Chubby Brown (the fucking fat Leper), in a coffee shop.

I was in a band with the drummer from EMF, until his left finger fell off.

The best one though, was I went to see Rob Newman and David Baddiel live and got Rob to sign a punishment slip (something that the leper colony of a school I went to gave to us when we were naughty, and our parents were meant to sign it, but me mam ain't go no hands)
and I gave it in.

THEN they mention it in the NME, which was fucking boss MAN!

Then I spilt coffee on the head of the Turkish Police yesterday, and it spilt in his weeping wounds, but he didn't mind 'cause I'm a foreigner.

And Noel 'lazar' Gallagher once pissed on me foot, and his Leper-esque mate Richard Ashcroft bumped into me in the House of Fraser.

COR Blimey I've met shit loads of Lepers.

Paul Heaton (talented Leper)
Alex Higgins (Drunk Leper)
John Parrot (Scouse Lepper)
John Sessions (Method Acting Leper)
The Grumble Weeds (Lepers all 3 of 'em)
Dooby Ducks Duck Truck (Puppet Lepers)
Ian Rush (Legwndary Leper)
Sandie Tosvick (Lezzer-Leper)
Johnny Ball (Mathmatical Leper)
Eddie Izzard (Cross-Dressing Leper)
a couples of lepers from Big Brother whose names I didn't know 'cause I don't watch the leper infested crap
and............
Robbie Williams (Cunt)

Maybe I'm Jesus ?
(you're all a bunch of twats anyway, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 17:49, Reply)

I hit Thom Yorke in the back with a football
that is all
( coco, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 17:20, Reply)

Last night in the pub...
I met a bloke whose mum played one of the Gorgs in Fraggle Rock. True story.
(FartLumps, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 17:07, Reply)

Ummmm .......
.. I have a few minor claims to fame

My boss at weekends is Janet St Porter ...

.. During the week my boss is Simon Kelner .. (82nd most influential person in the country - allegedly)

... I work with Charles Kennedy's ex-speech writer..

... One of my mates used to be the fella in the Honey Monster suit!! ... (God! How can anyone top that??)

... As a child i met the Queen when she was giving out Maunday Money...

... I grew up with Chris Bonnington's kids Rupert & Daniel - or Bonny and Joey (as in Deakin!) if you knew them....

... I went out on a coupla dates with Julia Reid (from Robot Wars)...

... I used to be in a WW2 re-enactment society as was used as an extra in the final battle of Saving Private Ryan.....

... Ive also met Bob Holness & Anita Roddick.





Oh! ..... And my dad invented the question mark.
( Jaffacake, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 16:57, Reply)

I invented badgers
They were originally intended for an Asda advert, but the marketing people didn't like the black.

Shame!
(pinkcress, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 16:56, Reply)

ok, these are lame
* I once worked, and got really drunk, with a couple of actresses from the swedish soap "skilda världar"
* I once shook hands with the swedish queen.
* I've met Elin Lanto, who has a hit now on radio with "I won't cry".
* My girlfriend was an extra in a swedish move called "innan frosten" ("before the frost", or something like that.) and I met the lead actor when i drove her to the set.
( The little pink animal is mostly harmless, except on, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 16:19, Reply)

Meeting Mr and Mrs Black America
By odd chance and the flimsiest of pretexts, I found myself pitching a television program concept to Oprah Winfrey. Told I had five minutes, I was unexpectedly quite good and kept her interest for a half hour, at which point I abruptly ran out of spin, touched her plump, limp hand, and exited. Propelled out of her dressing room by an adrenalin rush, I rounded a corner too quickly and knocked myself senseless against the rib cage of a tall Black man. He extended an arm to help me up, but I chose to shake his hand and remain crumpled on the floor. "Well, LOOK WHO'S HERE!" I babbled idiotically. It was Jesse Jackson.

Oprah did the program, by the way, and it went quite well. A few weeks later I called my dad to tell him about it and learned he had been a guest on her show around the same time. Apparently it did not go so well, as the epsiode was never aired. He got to ride in a limo though.
( scartoonist, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 16:06, Reply)

Three seconds of heaven
I looked down Charisma Carpenter's shirt. She was bending down in front of me to get something.

I also once wrote a letter to my local paper asking them to make the "kids' page" bigger (I was six at the time). I ended up winning an award for "one of the best letters written this year" and went to a luncheon and had a tour of the newspaper and everything.
( Sydney Bintstow, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 16:04, Reply)

My mother knew a writer on the American show "Friends"
And I was an extra on it twice...

Also am some third cousin of the main actress in "My Girl", Anna Chlumsky.
(sheikgeek, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 15:57, Reply)

Appearing for half a second on TV
in the audience for "Who Dares Wins", a satirical /topical comedy on Channel 4 in the mid/late 80s. I have the video somewhere to prove it.
( Uzbek Lobster http://custardsurgery.com/azerbaijan, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 15:47, Reply)

I just remembered...
When I was a wee lad, Hayley Mills au-pair gave me an extra biscuit because I was "cute". (I was at playgroup with Crispin Mills of Kula Shaker fame)
(tree hugger putting the "semen" in "basement"..., Sat 26 Feb 2005, 15:46, Reply)

Another 1
My guitar teacher played for alice cooper and was in Wayne's World :D
ALSO!
My great great grandpa founded the abbey national! On the other hand, i have no claim to fame atall :(
(homochicken, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 15:40, Reply)

Tra la
Celebritiy photo ops:

The panhandler from b3ta's "give us your money" pic. I'm the twunt in the hat.
1 2 3
He has been a fixture around midtown Manhattan for years and years, and thats's what his sign really says. Haven't seen him in a while, though. Maybe he died or something.

Jello Biafra, formerly of Dead Kennedys. I'm the fool on the right.

Aaron McGruder, who draws "The Boondocks" comic strip (dunno if it's known outside US at all)

Isaac Bonewits and Margot Adler, well-known authors in US Neopagan culture

Non celebrity...

My friends and I gave a big stupid presentation at a major hacker convention last year, during which we did such amusing and clever things as turning the con's logo into goatse. We got in the papers for it. I'm the twunt in the hat again.
( Rob T Firefly talked, like, William Shatner, on, Sat 26 Feb 2005, 15:23, Reply)