Yay! One for me!
I have a small circle of close friends, we all love to drink and we all love to fish.

Last year, the wife of one of our circle died. She'd valiantly battle cancer for 6 years, and unfortunately succumbed to MRSA as her immune system just couldn't fight anymore.
It was a dark time for all of us. My husband had lost his dad a month previously, my mum had just been diagnosed with lung cancer, and the daughter of our friend was in jail.

As friends do, we rallied round and did what we could to help the guy out - took him fishing, let him cry on our shoulders etc.

A month or so later, my husband and I had a seperation, and I rented a room off this guy as he was rattling around in his house alone. He was a good friend to me.

Fast forward to January, my husband and I broke up. This time, my friends rallied round to help me out, and they'd often take me out for dinner etc. Our friends daughter had gotten out of jail, and for lack of a (trustworthy) female influence in her life, I started doing stuff for her - giving her rides places etc.

This brought her dad and I closer together, but just as friends - we went out for dinner a few times, nothing in it.
At the end of February when my mum was rushed to hospital, I spent a couple of nights in their spare room, and the night she died G just sat there holding me while I cried and talked to my family back home. He cried with me, mourning my loss and reflecting on his.

The following week passed in a blur, and on the Saturday I held a service here in the US for mum. All of my friends came - they all knew mum.

That night, I was exhausted and didn't want to be alone so asked G if I could stay at his again. We got spectacularly drunk and he confessed he had feelings for me that were more than just friendly.

We started dating, and now have an awesome relationship and, quite frankly, are stupidly in love with one another.

He's 59 and I'm 34.

He's awesome in bed.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:43, 3 replies)

Time for a bit of truth
some of that know me may know that i have worked out in the shithole that is malia, crete for the past 5 summers and have lots of fun there living a very good life as one of those annoying BASTARDS that comes up to you on the street and gets you to go in bars. I hate to say I'm quite good at it but I generally get the people into my bar by being friendly and making people laugh etc...

I can confess to having had many lovers over the years as it isn't difficult in the holiday situation to get a good looking girl into bed for some no strings sexy time, I have learnt many skills in my time there and would confess to being a ladies man. I have many friends there as well.

There is a bar in Malia called Molly Malones, it's an irish bar and it is very unlike all the otehr "2 for 1" youth appeal bars there and I like the atmosphere, I usually sneak in at some awful ungodly hour for a pint of guinness and a laugh.

our story starts here. It was 2005 and i went in as usual and Molly Malones was quite busy and there was karaoke on, I'd had a stressful night at work and wanted to chill out. A friend who i shant name's mum was out to see him and had started drinking in Molly's while she waited for him to finish work so they could go and get a kebab or something, she was a great lady, only late 30s and very pretty. She must have had him when she was young and i sat with her for a bit, thinking nothing of it other than sitting having a beer with a mate's cool mum. We were having quite a laugh and somehow in our drunken state we ended up down at the beach at her suggestion because she wanted to see "what it was like"

I'm not sure how it happened but all of a sudden we were both naked in the sea (in the shallow bit DUH) and I had her bent over and was literally balls deep inside her, then it dawned on me - I AM SHAGGING MY MATE'S MUM and a feeling of both amazement and guilt and shame and greatness was thrust upon me all at the same time.

She was amazing, I fell for her a little in that short and we both agreed to this day that we would never tell anyone. i'm truly sorry I did it but i don't regret it.

not one bit.

sorry mate
( SickRik float like a camembert sting like a brie, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:38, 13 replies)

Was with a 15 year old when i was 22
That was naughty I know. She was nearly 16 though. But i didnt ever break the law with her so I guess that was OK. She actually finished with me :)

So I started dating her slightly older mate who was 16.

When I was 24 I started dating a 17 year old. that lasted a year. Then when I was 25 I started dating another 17 year old..

What can I say? I like em fresh :)

Though I've swung the other way now and had a go on a 31 year old. That was interesting :D
(Miggyman, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:38, 21 replies)

him again
It was years later, long after the merton gig.
It played through my mind.
I'd had a run in with that meldrew feller again and come across badly. I always came across badly.
I'd fallen out of bed again. Wedged up between the old bed and the wall. The room stunk. The room always stunk.
I dragged myself up and had a sip of scotch...mmm... it was warming. The heating never worked in the place.
It was always cold.
The embassy was expecting me. I had to look the part.
I wandered downstairs and mum put me some breakfast on. twelve sausages, three eggs and four rounds of toast. I poured myself a hearty cup of PG and burst into tears.
I cried every morning, mum didn't even notice anymore.
I was still crying as i approached Westbourne Grove and passed the bus stop.
I noticed my old friends stood waiting at the stop. Larry Goldstien and Amjad Gorshani had been friends since they were kids.
They both smiled as I walked past, I heard Amjad ask Larry when the bus would be coming along but I was too far away to hear his response.
I arrived at the embassy, but alas it was closed up tight. Every window covered by slats of wood and board.
I heard the bus roaring up the road and watched it slow down to let a pair of nuns from the local parish pass down the old roman road.
I'd been to the doctors yesterday and told him about my latest fantasy, he'd told me to 'pull myself together' and he was right.
I decided to go into the pub up the road. Always welcome there, perhaps i'd see Tommy in there...
I aproached the pub from the rear and opened the rusty old doors.
There was Tommy, a decorated war hero, Thomas Wheatley, same name as his father.
Tommy was entertaining the lads with some old war tale when I hovered in. The lads were Mickey O'Flanagan and Hamish McKenny. I had sicked a little bit onto by cumberbund.
"Hello there you lot" i shouted, but they didn't hear.
No one ever answered any more.
I floated down the road and back into my house. Mum was waiting. She always had a tear in her eye.
"gone" she sobbed... "the gentle giant"
I opened my mouth and a pebble dropped into my lap.
The bedsores and welts made me weap.
I wobbled back and forth like a broken zebedee.
The maw.
The awful maw...
(jindodsdadsdogsdead I am not stusut79, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:37, 5 replies)

My girlfriend
...is 27 years older than me. We met when I was 27 - so she was exactly double my age.

Honest truth.

However, age is just a number. She's a hottie, and I love her to bits.
(EuroSong I love horse meat: best of all the animals, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:36, 4 replies)

Mistaken Identity
Several years back my mate was round my house one evening and we were generally wasting our time, hanging out and doing very little. At the time he was in his early 20's and his girlfriend had just turned 50. Now I'm an open-minded stupidly optimistic kinda chap so it's never really been a problem for me. Clearly the same can't be said of my father who, after we heard the doorbell ring, shouted up the stairs to my mate in an excruciatingly loud voice...

"HEY, COME DOWN, YOUR MUM'S HERE!"

It wasn't his mum....
( Gleeballs is mostly made out of chocolate and hate., Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:33, Reply)

My fiance is 5 years older than me.
Not much of an age gap, as things go, but he swears he lost his virginity at 15 to his babysitter who was in her 30s.

Am I being ridiculous or justified by wanting to stab him in the face every time he mentions how amazing older women are or how it was the best shag he ever had?
(Marmite Omelette ...but I feel better having screamed, don't you?, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:30, 3 replies)

The blonde bird I pulled in Portugal
I'm 30 :0)

hee hee
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:22, 3 replies)

shagged a 43 year old indian woman at a house party once
i was 21 at the time.

she had hairy legs.

i was very drunk.

i try not to think about it much, but this question of the week has brought it all flooding back.

(she fucking loved it though)
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:21, 2 replies)

I had sex with a tree that was over 400 years old
Etc.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:20, 2 replies)

Im 4 and a half years older than my wife
she acts like a spoilt 12 year old though
( Peej, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:20, 4 replies)

The biggest age gap I've had was 2 years
And now the current one is 2 months younger than me.

suits me just fine

edit: it's a different one obviously
( morrybyte made a subtle namechange at, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:17, 2 replies)

Crackhouseceilidhband's story reminded me
Me and...


YOUR DAUGHTER!

So, so sorry
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:16, 1 reply)

My boyfriend,,,
... other than being wonderful (sorry, do feel free to vomit) is 32, I'm 22. I love the mega eyebrow raise (into hairline usually) you get when talking to people :

random: "so, did you two meet at uni"

Me: "Actually, no, I was 13 when he graduated!"
(Celebgil, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:13, Reply)

Hope this hasn't bindun.
Because it gives me a great oppotunity to unearth a Partridge quote.

uk.youtube.com/watch?v=kEl5RvbGdik

Back of the net!
(RDFCRob Please God let Obama win!, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:08, Reply)

im 21 tomorrow
and my boyfriend is 39. dated for 2 1/2 years. good thing about older men is that they are fucking brilliant in bed!

also had a one niighter with a 30 year old when i was 17, aslo fucking great in bed but was a tosser.
( sarah sarah sarah, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:06, Reply)

Groupy guppy gropey.
I went to Skegness in a rocket ship and did a piss on the Queen.
We we're exactly the same age at the time due to me travelling at the speed of light.
And this is probably the nearest thing to the truth you will read in this weeks Dear Deidre QOTW.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:05, 39 replies)

i still cringe
when i realised I had spent 20 minutes typing up an answer only to find the question had closed. In any event im gonna paste it here anyway


OK, in chronological order....

In Primary 6 our female teacher wasn't in one day and the male teacher from next door was ocassionaly popping in to make sure we weren't being twats. At one there are only 6 of us in the class and we are fucking about, not doing any work, i jump up and head towards the teachers desk and declare that i was "going to see if the teacher had any scud mags in her drawer", at the very same moment the male teacher came into the classroom. he took me out and was son in my face i could smell his rotting fucking breath, the fucking cunt.

2 years of cringing followed.

Only last year, I had driven to work, which was very rare and parked in a free, yet downtrodden part of the city. On leaving work i got about 20 steps when i realised i needed a shit. Did i walk back and evacuate my bowels, nah. I kept walking towards the car, eventually sweating and doing THAT walk, i could see the car, but just knew that i was over the event horizon........i spied a bush.......but i had nothing to wipe my caramacked arsehole with...so it in amoment of clarity i take off my shoe, take off the sock and proceed to wipe the beshitted bullethole.....at the very same moment a woman walks straight past....ok, i was shrouded in shadow, bit 100% visible...i really didn't give a shit (ho ho) at that point and would have berated her for looking had she said anything.

In work, i was asked to evaluate and possibly completely redo a website. the current site was a bag of fuck, and no one in their right mind would be happy with it. I said as much and didn't really care that the guy in charge was a bit taken aback, it WAS terrible.....So ffwd a few weeks and they are impressed with my schtick and ask me to go for it. I wait for a bit, but the guy in charge of IT doesn't come over to speak to me, to welcome me to the team or any of that normal stuff. So i head over on an other matter and mention that i wil be joining his team to work on the reworking of site X. i laugh and say that the current site is 'absolutely shite', in that way that web developers do with each other...he forces a bovine snort and i head back to my desk....5 mins later i get a call from the head of dept who wants to know why i slagged off the site to the guy who built it.....i felt my world collapse and my arse go ever so shitty.........what months that followed where amongst the coldest on record as the twat who couldn't take the criticism effectively ignored me, with the result that the site never got finished properly. I still cringe when i think about this...but i was right.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:04, 1 reply)

Just remembered another one...
My friend from university, let's call him Martin, for that is his name...

He spent a good few years after graduating doing nothing much except boozing and a part time job in Burger King, then decided fuck it, he needed to get a career, what's wrong with teaching? He had a maths degree too which made him especially appealing as I think it's a shortage area and he got extra pay.

Anyway, he did his PGCE somewhere up North then came down to London for an interview a mutual friend who's a teacher had set him up with at a quite nice private school in North London. Naturally, after the interview he took the opportunity to catch up with some of our old mates from Uni who live down this way for a few beers (I wasn't present, for the record).

An evening of boozing in Holloway, Tufnell Park, etc, ends up with him shagging some girl in the toilets of a bar. At the end, she asks him if he lives locally and he says 'No, I'm just down for an interview - I was at X school yesterday for a Maths job.'

'Oh,' she says brightly, 'I'm starting my A-levels there next year!'

He phoned next week to withdraw his application for the job and got one in a comprehensive up North instead.
(SnowyTheWereRabbit the Leporid from Hell, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 15:04, Reply)

11 years in my favour
I was 20 and she was 31, she had her own flat and owned her own hairdressing shop.

She taught me the joys of woman on top, quote; "I always come quickly this way".......

So if I am ever lucky enough to end up underneath any of the ladies on here, I'm not being lazy I'm doing it for you.......
(Dark Matter All The Wonders In The World & We Invent Boredom, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:57, 1 reply)

My first love
There was a 12 year age gap between us but I didn't mind. I had just turned 17 and was ready for new things. She helped me get out of the small Somerset village I had grown up in and experience new places. I owe a lot to my first love and we were together for almost 10 years. However, towards the end she had become unreliable and eventually had a complete breakdown. It broke my heart to end that relationship, but all my friends and family supported my decision. I sold her to a 17 year old lad and bought a Mondeo.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:55, 6 replies)

Old people have weird perceptions...
Visiting my gran back when I was about twelve, she was talking about the old chap down the road and how he was full of life despite being 80 and having a fake hip.

'He's even been stepping out with Alison from across the road, and she's only 14'

Eh?

Asked her to repeat and that was indeed what she'd said. She seemed to think this was fine though - nothing weird about it at all.

Mind you, this was in the Valleys...
(SnowyTheWereRabbit the Leporid from Hell, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:53, Reply)

Bleeding hell!
Is anyone on this site in a relationship with someone their own age?
( girlinthehole, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:53, 8 replies)

Not really an age
gap story, but still...

I was 30, she was the older woman (36). She taught me two things..

1) Cuffs and collar don't always match. She was dark haired, but not down below. I nearly shat myself when I pulled down her jeans to reveal a bright orange ball of fur staring up at me. I thought my cat had beaten me to it!

2) I now truly understand the meaning of waving a sausage in the albert hall. Jesus christ she was loose. I don't think it touched the sides once. You know it's bad when it's the man asking if it's in yet!
( Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:52, 12 replies)

Given my youthfulness combined with my mature features, I've only ever slept with one person younger than me (6 weeks younger in fact).
The elders have ranged from only a few days older, to 7 years my senior.
Oddly enough I only regret the younger one (if you want to dig, you'll find out why). The eldest was pretty damn nifty: I recommend you find the nearest 30 year old French woman and do the nasty :)

I apologies for a piss poor non-tale.
(tweebianmonkey Should be known as Widget, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:52, Reply)

My girlfriend just turned 50.
And I just turned 22.
Funnily enough, I'm the more mature one in our relationship. Some people may find it strange, but age is only a number really. I couldn't love anyone more.
(Dazzorifik is bored of b3ta, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:52, 15 replies)

Naughty older french lady
When 23 I was introduced by a friend of my mothers to another friend of hers who was about to turn 40. She was recently divorced with a 15 year old son & 12 year old daughter. Following the set up by my mother’s friend of a couple of social “events” I ended up in bed with her on her 40th birthday.

This should have been a one off – she gets some young male as a birthday present & I get the experience of an older woman to “complete my education” as my Dad put it some time later… My Dad was only 7 years older than her BTW…

Fast forward a few months we were in a relationship, buying a house together etc. I’ve never been particularly ageist (have friends of all ages) however there were certain things that did feel a bit odd such as at the age of 24 to be giving my 17 year old “step son” driving lessons.

I was in this relationship for 4 years & spent most of that time not doing what most normal people in their mid twenties do (drinking too much, shagging around when possible etc) and instead spent my evenings and weekends renovating our house. I am now 35 & continue to make up for that lost time.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:51, Reply)

I'm 165 years old and I'm dating a lass who's still in the womb.
Beat that!
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:51, 5 replies)

I
Had a wank over that Felicity Kendal...a recent photo
( awsm! namaste bitches, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 14:50, Reply)