sigh
I once came across a deer that had a stone stuck in it's craw. I quickly whipped out a dressing from my first-aid kit ...
(frankspencer, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 16:19, Reply)

oh deary deary me
i had a lovely rook in the shop the other day.
supplied him with a complete outfit.
look wonderful he did.

im a crows dresser
(UnstableDan Bah, Humbug! ooooh, humbugs, nyom!, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 16:10, Reply)

this is silly
I regularly get changed in the middle of the road.
in those places painted black and white reserved for people who need to get to the other side.

shoot us all.
(UnstableDan Bah, Humbug! ooooh, humbugs, nyom!, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 16:04, Reply)

stop it now!
Ronaldo tore down the wing and flashed an undefendable ball into the opposition box.

during this time, I put my clothes on etc etc etc
(UnstableDan Bah, Humbug! ooooh, humbugs, nyom!, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 16:02, Reply)

Cross Dresser
I'm a Cross Dresser.

My apparel makes all those around me upset, mood and very cross - A pox on all your houses!

I'm going to stop posting these inane idiotic ramblings now
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 15:52, Reply)

tenuous!
I once put on a dress.
and it was amusing.
roll on thursday.
(UnstableDan Bah, Humbug! ooooh, humbugs, nyom!, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 15:52, Reply)

Broadway
I was on set and I had to get the set re-arranged quickly - unfortuantely the love-ys were in the way and the set wasn't changed, but the show had to go on.

I was rather cross about that one.

(Think about it)
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 15:45, Reply)

sort of on topic
There's a guy in America who was a women - he took the testosterone - got the boobs removed -has facial hair - the works - but decided to keep the female genitals - Now he makes porno films where his girlfriend fucks him with a huge dildo front and back.

You gotta love America!
( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 15:44, Reply)

Mom, Its not puppy fat, LOOK!
being an overweight little lad i was painfully awakened to my portly state when i realised my sisters bra cupped my man boobs rather adequately. at this point my mother got a bollocking about always saying puppy fat will go in time, giving me a false sense of self worth security and i dropped to the floor and did pressups ever since. i still eat like shit but at least the boobs have gone. and i can pick people up at will.

reason for having my sisters bra on you ask? i was helping mom with the washing and i fell. honest.
(hatofjam built a friend out of lego on, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 15:41, Reply)

Hold the front page..
Bottom of barrel scraped close to new question of the week on B3TA Shocker!
(The_Greyhound wrote www.luckymcdanger.blog.co.uk on, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 15:11, Reply)

I crossed Christianity with metal

my apologies to both.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 15:06, Reply)

Pikeys
You'll never see a pikey in a dress

He'll be cross anyway because they all are

Or is that stupid?
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 14:42, Reply)

B*llocks
I decided once to cross a dress with a jumper, but it wasn't quite right and ended up being a jess - I decided to go back to the source and cross a sheep with a cow to make the perfect material for my jumper-dress cross, but the cross wasn't right and ended up with an angry sheep which, using my own take on English could be considered cross.

When I got dressed, I realised that the jess was still alive which made it very cross and the dress was too short.

I was indeed cross as was the jess, dress and cross.

Now it's just noise
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 14:42, Reply)

Disgusting
They should gas these dirty bastards at birth and impale their heads on spikes as a warning to all others who might follow.

Hang on...this is the "What's the best thing to do with Pikeys?" thread, isn't it?
(phil lawton, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 14:41, Reply)

cross overload
I once sat listening to Christopher Cross's version of Arthur's Theme while watching The Dresser and Miller's Crossing on two TV screens simultaneously, and making a dress from cross-stiching. This was in King's Cross, near the dress shop opposite the zebra crossing called Dress Crossing.

Never mind - two more days to go.
(frankspencer, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 14:25, Reply)

Oooh....
When you put your jumper on back to front or your leg in the wrong trouser hole. Or you get your skirt caught in the back of your knickers. Or you put your finger through your tights in the morning when you're running late.

Now that's cross dressing.
(Alice The Camel is one of the soon to be extinct 1-humped variety, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 13:21, Reply)

not so much cross-dressing but
I do have long luxurious blond hair, and unfortunately often get mistaken for a girl from behind, which isn't helped by my penchant for tight jeans. Thats why I grew a beard.

Anyway a few years ago I worked as a surveyor at the Wembley Stadium work site. This meant I spent a lot of time leaning over tripods getting whistled at by ugly male builders, at which point I was always able to turn around, give them the finger and yell "Fuck off you retards!"

Also, me and my girlfriend are often mistook for lesbians and I get my arse pinched way too often at clubs.
(Roopy all is not what it seams, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 13:05, Reply)

Another cross dresser.
While dressing this morning I became very cross when I realized there were 2 days left until Thursday.
(barrycounty, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 13:00, Reply)

I can run around in heels...
As a transvestite, cross dressing is sort of my job. I can think of a couple of funny things that have happened while I've been out cross dressing.

One evening I was at the late lamented Full Tilt at the Electric Ballroom in Camden. There I was in my little black dress, fishnets, heels, wig, etc., sitting next to my best friend who was chatting to someone or other. As I was sitting there, minding my own business, a little fat skinhead, aged about thirty, came and sat next to me and started dribbling in my ear about the music. I didn't think anything of it until I realised that he was touching my knee an awful lot and it suddenly occurred to me "Shit. He thinks I'm a real girl!" Although I'm bisexual I didn't think he was (and he was a bit ugly), so I had to think of a way out of it without getting my face punched in. I jabbed my best friend in the side a couple of times until she eventually looked round and saw my predicament. She leaned over and asked me if I wanted to get a drink with her, so I nodded desperately and we ran to the bar.

He followed us. I didn't realise that he had until I was stood at the bar and I felt him pressing up against my back. I looked towards my friend with total fear, she realised what was going on and put her arms round me and said "Excuse me, do you mind leaving my girlfriend alone?". The skinhead pulled a face of "Ugh! Lesbians" and ran away. Hurrah.


Another time at Full Tilt, I got a phonecall, so ducked into the toilets and into a cubicle to take the call. The guys in the toilet were a bit surprised when I said "Okay, bye" in my fairly male sounding voice then emerged from the cubicle as a female.
(Iris_Wildthyme is three sheets to the wind, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 12:46, Reply)

Me and a friend (both male... just.)
Went to the local 24hr garage at 3 in the morning to buy a newspaper, pot noodle, loaf of bread and a packet of fruit pastilles.


We were wearing nothing but a pair of pink and yellow hotpants each.
(bobming, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 12:39, Reply)

Do you
Do you remember Kriss Kross? They dressed funny.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kris_Kross

I'm at the bottom of the barrel here
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 12:35, Reply)

I'm a bloke who wears skirts
it's not that big a deal...I wear quite "manly" skirts that fit with what I wear normally anyway. I even have one with a zip fly to save on those awkward moments at the urinal.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 12:30, Reply)

More
I've got me a slave/butler/whatever - he helps me get ready in the morning, so he doesn't appreaciate it when I continuously change my mind about what I'm wearing.

That certainly makes him a Cross Dresser.

Nope, still not sorry
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 12:19, Reply)

Cross Dress
Marginally off topic.

My Mum's a hardcore catholic - she has a dress that liberally decorated with Crucifixes

Does that qualify as a Cross Dress?

No?

/drainpipe

Agree with FrankSpencer there

This story is completely untrue - apart from the catholic part
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 12:18, Reply)

every new years eve: kilt
every year I get felt up by everybody, which could be one (main?) of the reasons I do it; I've had women beg like puppies to look up me kilt-honest.
last year one wouldn't leave me alone about it though I kept refusing (hard to get always makes em keen? discuss) until 1a.m worse for bevvy and her request that she'd get on her knees to be discrete....
her shriek rocked the bar as I paraded the jewels.

lenght & girth-makes em shriek-nuff sed. move on.
(mickturate if i could be arsed i'd be bored, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 11:48, Reply)

I almost would

but apparently she's had the chop, so that's OK.


(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 11:43, Reply)

It's a bit off subject, but cross dressing got me introuble =(
... well firstly a bit of background:

The missus (I use the term loosly as we're not actually married) is Canadian, whereas i am a Brit, i live in blighty she lives across the pond. I got to visit her once every month for about a week (oh how i love being a sysadmin).

I am a very forgetful person, every time i visit i ALWAYS forget something, which she finds and keeps in her bedroom (she lives with her parents, she is 16 afterall... hey c'mon im only 17)...

Unfortuantly yesterday, i was sitting reading b3ta in Canada, and her mother walked up to me with a rather, shall we say 'disgruntled' expression on her face. "Uh oh" says i, knowing that this could mean only one thing: she wasn't happy about something, and her being FRENCH canadian means that she has the temper of a raging rhinoceros.

I'm usally pretty adept at getting myself out of sticky situations and talking myself out of things, but what happened next was a case of "Oops". She pulled out some black underwear and put it infront of me. "I found these in my daughters bed"... uhm... what to say? Being the genius that i am, thought i'd get myself in a little bit more shit that i was already in.

"Oh, i wondered where i'd left them!"

Not happy... she was really not happy and stormed off. Should i of kept quiet? I had to stick my fist in my mouth to stop myself laughing out loud!

Oh right, the QOTW... the reason the offending items were found in her bed was becuase she likes to wear my boxers in bed, of course i already knew this but that'd just spoil the fun telling the MIL.

Click i like this if you think it was an intelligent descision ;)

Length, girth? Well just look at the size of my undies
( Axai is in Montréal, Canada O.o, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 11:08, Reply)

Men in skirts, ladies in...trousers?
Hello peeps, my first ever post - it appeals to me that it's on a cross dressing thread!

Whenever people talk about cross dressing, the assumption is it's got to be blokes dressing like ladies, though I suppose it's a bit more a leap to go from keks to skirts - women can already wear trousers!

I think there are probably more men that get off on ladies underwear/stockings/skirts than we know about - I think the reason it's not talked about is because of the stigma attached. Although most women I know think Eddie Izzard is as fit as...
(Fox'sGlacier, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 11:06, Reply)

A very cross dresser
My uncle is a stripper - which is to say that he strips old buildings of their furniture and sells it on or uses it for his carpentry hobby. Recently, he had to strip a church and there was a huge cross.

Not wanting to waste the top quality teak wood, he sliced it into planks and fashioned a pretty Welsh dresser from them. I suppose it was a cross dresser!

[Well, come on! This QOTW stopped being entertaining days ago and 90% of the stories are the same: "I got drunk and dressed as a bird and everyone fancied me / mistook me for a real woman / couldn't give a flying fuck."]
(frankspencer, Tue 20 Mar 2007, 11:03, Reply)