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This is a question MTFU

When have you had to be brave when all you've wanted to do was weep like a blubber-titted bitch?
Tell us so we can judge you.

via Smash Monkey

(, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 17:36)
Pages: Popular, 4, 3, 2, 1

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Shit Times.
In 2000, my Mrs and I at a routine ultrasound scan 38 weeks into pregnancy were told that our baby wasn't alive. (weeks later we found out that the acid reflux doctors had diagnosed her with during the pregnancy was actually pancreatitis, which was assumed to be the reason why we lost our little girl). she then had to give birth naturally, we had to bury the daughter we'd never got to meet.

Later in the year when her symptoms were worse and not masked by the pregnancy, the pancreatitis was diagnosed by an f1 AFTER being sent home from A and E a dozen times in as many days by consultants who weren't worried because the ecg she'd had every time she was there was within the norms. It seems every consultant that saw her had forgotten that chest pain isn't just down to heart problems, but a lowly f1, with fresher training, AND going against the opinions of her consultant tested for pancreatitis anyway. If she hadn't done the test, my Mrs would be dead. she spent a week in intensive care, had an operation to have her gall bladder removed, and went on to recover physically.

I spent nearly 8 months holding in tears, and I eventually broke down when my mum asked me if I was o.k.

Shit times. Just, really shit times.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 8:58, 80 replies)
Jesus, dude.
You could have put an "alright" or something about willies and bums in there somewhere.

All the sads :(
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 9:18, closed)
Alright Willy Bum?

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:53, closed)
Much the same thing. *manhugs*
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 9:29, closed)
Ah shit.
A genuine emotion crippler. Pain no-one can ever prepare you for. SANDS helped the Mrs so much. I hope you and yours are ok now fella.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:52, closed)
We did OK somehow without SANDS/BLISS etc. A lot of bawling, howling and cursing the world seemed to help.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:45, closed)

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 9:30, closed)
Yeah mate.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:50, closed)

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:28, closed)
Fucking "OWWWWW"
38 weeks AND having to still give birth. Shit times indeed.

Trust she's ok now at least?
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 9:31, closed)
She is, thank you.
13 years is a long time, a wonderful organisation called SANDS helped, we now have four kids, and I have a decent career. we still get some depression around the same time every year, but these days it's the what if's that get you. she'd have been thirteen. That can thoroughly mess with your headspace.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:21, closed)
That's a light start to morning coffee.

*uncomfortably firm man-hugs*
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 9:41, closed)
I've changed this post out of respect to Sweep. I could post many examples of some of the truly awful things that shambo and some of the respondents here have posted about me and my family but that really would defeat the purpose.
Suffice to say that I'm sorry for any upset or offence my post caused Sweeplovesfisting, there certainly was no intent in that direction.
To many of the rest of you - something about throwing glass-houses at boulders.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 10:36, closed)
That's it. Make the thread about you, you repulsive little cunt.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 10:38, closed)

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:28, closed)
Dear god you're actually a total prick.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:49, closed)
This is why everybody thinks you're a prick.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:06, closed)
c'mon Misery
this isn't about you.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:47, closed)
Hadn't you heard?
Everything is about him. That's what his mummy told him and none of you horrid bullies are going to change his mind.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:50, closed)
Could you make all of this not about him and ban the tedious prick?
All he ever does is beaker and spam shit reposts.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:53, closed)
I love it when you're manly.
man chin
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:59, closed)
You stupid pathetic cunt.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:44, closed)
Shut the fuck up you sordid mediocrity.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 17:21, closed)
What the fuck is wrong with you?

(, Sat 3 Aug 2013, 0:46, closed)
*Appreciative and awkward man hugs back*
Cheers fella.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:49, closed)
At one of the final appointments before the birth of our eldest,
the SHO told the consultant "there's no heartbeat". Consultant took over, confirmed this, then started to look a bit worried. I suggested that he might want to fuck off and find a midwife, which he did; midwife promptly took over, found the heartbeat within, well, a heartbeat, and pointed out to the two medical professionals behind her that "there's no heartbeat" isn't exactly what a heavily pregnant woman wants to hear, and that there are probably better ways to let someone know that they've lost their baby.

None of the above even comes close to your story, and so you have my deepest sympathies.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 9:53, closed)
Thank you.
Time, as the cliche goes, heals. You never, ever forget though. Not even for a day.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:35, closed)

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 9:56, closed)
Not really, that sucks, man. Sorry to hear this tale.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 9:56, closed)
No worries mate.
To be honest I expected a torrent of weird and evil trolling. My faith in humanity is restored. At least until the Mrs watches Eastenders.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:48, closed)
Was not expecting this week's question to contain genuine sads. Have some more manhugs.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 10:01, closed)
Cheers fella.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:37, closed)
Hope life has got better for you.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 10:05, closed)
Life is pretty good thanks.
15 years and still together, despite a dose of tragedy, must be doing something right.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:39, closed)
Don't really........
.....know what to say that isn't trite or shite. Deepest respect, and I hope everything is a little better. Sad, sad times.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 10:19, closed)
Cheers Groover.
Your thoughts are appreciated.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:43, closed)
Just to say...
...i've had a single teardrop fall from my eye whilst digesting this one.
Hits home when you see your healthy brats leaping around and annoying you.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:19, closed)
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:36, closed)
Really sorry to hear that Sweep
Have a big man hug from me on this one.
My ex lost a child after two months and bled badly. I can't imagine what it must have been like after 38 weeks.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:41, closed)
It was the finding out. Like getting punched in the stomach. Blindsided.
Thanks fella. I've been virtually manhugged so much I'm starting to ask myself serious questions. Do you come here often?
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:46, closed)
Almost daily
Its something to do isnt' it
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:06, closed)
Have a lady hug to balance things out
*reaches round and pinches bottom*
Glad you have both made it past the sad times fisty. Much love to you. I can't even begin to know what you have both been through. What an excellent relationship you must have to have come through it. x
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 23:18, closed)
That sounds like a deeply unpleasant experience for all concerned.
Well played on coming through it in one piece.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 11:54, closed)
I don't like this.
Kudos on holding it in that long.

*stiff upper lip click*
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:13, closed)
What can I say
I was bad enough just listening to my son's heart slow down once in a while on the monitor. To lose a child at 38 weeks is a tragedy.

You're getting enough man hugs, so I'm sure the b3ta collective won't mind if I pass on all of our best wishes to the missus too.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:38, closed)
I cannot believe you're using this tragedy as a chance to sniff around his wife.
You monster.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:48, closed)
I don't know why, she's had 4 kids, it'll be like two rashers of bacon stapled to a burger.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:55, closed)

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 13:39, closed)
Hawwww jyeah!

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 13:42, closed)
oh fuck
there are just no words :(
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 13:41, closed)
That's really rough.
All I can do is wish you well and give you a click.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 13:41, closed)
I can't imagine the pain of losing a child that late in a pregnancy.
I can empathise with the fear you must have felt with your wife's pancreatitis though. My wife was in hospital with bacterial meningitis last year and I've never felt so scared, vulnerable and alone as I did then.

Good thoughts to you all.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 13:43, closed)
I'm sorry but fail to see what this has to do with Misery McUglywife, I really do.
What about HIS life, EH? His wife broke a fingernail in a 10mph ding and yet you just WADE ON IN HERE giving it the big 'look at me'?

You make me sick.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 13:47, closed)
Four weeks ago yesterday
we had a little girl who was born alive and healthy. She's doing really well. Five weeks ago I'd have shrugged my shoulders at your story and passed it by.
Today I can only imagine how terrible that must have been for you & yours, and thank the non-existent that our nipper is hale and hearty.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 13:49, closed)
I read that as 'our nipper is Hartley Hare' and was about to gaz you my condolences

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:07, closed)

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:12, closed)

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:17, closed)

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:44, closed)
I can't even imagine the pain of that.
I'm glad things have turned around since.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:32, closed)
Can't imagine how dreadful that must have been for you both. Pleased to hear things have improved overtime.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:43, closed)
FFS Batts
Stop this internet grooming
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:50, closed)
You never really consider miscarriage as real until it happens to you.
or someone close to you.

Worst thing is the people using the phrase "lost the baby". As if its your fault and you left it in fucking Sainsburys or something.

Sometimes Nature kicks you in the balls really hard, and there's nothing you can do about it.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:43, closed)
*You're* a real miscarriage.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:47, closed)
And your mum's midwife threw away the baby and kept the placenta
"you ran down the crack of yo mammas ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress".

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 15:13, closed)
Fuck, really sorry to hear this

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:46, closed)
Sympathy from someone whose been there
So sorry to hear your story. We too lost a baby girl, stillborn three years ago. Amelia was at full term and died from a GBS infection - something which could have been easily dealt with if there was routine testing for this. My wife nearly died too from a combination of the infection and blood loss in theatre while undergoing a forceps delivery. Sadly, due to fertility issues (my unsuccessful vasectomy reversal), all further attempt at IVF with recovered sperm failed, although after the last few very rough years we are looking to the future now, having applied to adopt.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 15:10, closed)
[Imagine I wrote something cutting and cruel here]
Adopting is a very cool thing to do and I wish you the very best of luck with it.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 15:14, closed)
Agreeing with the doctor here
Even though he called me a monster - the frightful bully
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 18:21, closed)
Ahh mate, that's fucking terrible.
My condolences offered brother. It's been thirteen years for me and my Mrs. All I can say is that the acute anguish will diminish, to be replaced by a dull ache which will not go. This much I know.

I hope your steps to adopt go smoothly.
(, Sat 3 Aug 2013, 0:01, closed)
Cognitive disonance
All the big boys are finding it really it really hard to show they have girded keyboards but are also human.

I offer my condolences for your loss.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 16:46, closed)
Thank you.

(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 23:54, closed)
Having lost two
but both a fair bit earlier, I still can't even imagine what you must have been through. You have my total sympathy and respect.

There's not enough glomping here any more. *glomps to fuck*
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 17:21, closed)
The last time I was glomped was at a mates wedding.
Thanks, Needed that. made the mistake of reading through what I'd written earlier. Blimey. That was stupid. I'm so sorry you went through such tragedies yourself, and I hope you're through the crippling pain of it.
(, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 23:52, closed)
Bloody hell,
I'm totally lost for words to express my sympathy & condolences for what you and the Mrs have been through. So I'll just manhug you.

(, Sat 3 Aug 2013, 1:49, closed)

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