Well
Well I tried but you lot really are the saddest bunch of cunts in the known universe, I just can't pretend to fit in any more. I'm out of here, basically down the pub, watch the footy, fuck some birds etc, drive my fast car etc.

Enjoy guys enjoy.

(Shakes head and wishes he never bullied you all at school, you poor bastards)
(ruud316, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 12:02, 2 replies)

I hate you all
The nerds and the geeks at my schools delighted in ganging up on me and beating me up. There is a pecking order even for geeks.
And what the hell is a bootstrap loader and why does an octal debugger need on. Why does an octal need to load its boot straps before being de-buggered? I don't get it.
Loading a lorry I understand, loading a gun I understand..but loading a boot strap? WTF?
Buggering I understand..but how do you de-bugger something..is that like reverse buggery..pulling out before pushing in or something. You hated me at school and now your just rubbing it in.
Bastards
(godisdove I like cheese, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 11:54, Reply)

I met a girl over the internet.
I dont get out much you see..
Our e-conversations were very fluid (ooer), and we discussed a wide variety of topics from the relative security and anonymity of cyberspace.

However as the months progressed, our meeting became more of an inevitability than Gordon Brown delaying a general election until the odds are stacked more favourably toward him.

And so we agreed to meet in a spit and sawdust pub near her home.
I have to confess to being socially awkward, unable to look a woman directly in the eye or to make any form of tactile contact without shaking like a sufferer of Parkinsons disease in a earthquake measuring 7.3 on the richter scale, so it goes as read that I found the whole experience rather embarrassing as we sat in relative silence punctuated by stilted remarks about the weather and the taste of the real ale.

I had arranged to stay at her house, 10 minutes walk away. Imagine my joy when I saw and then powered on her PC. She quickly grabbed a laptop and sat in the kitchen.

Within minutes we were deep in conversation like old friends, although I did find it a little hard going when she came in and asked whether I'd like a cup of tea.
(Vic Flange, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 11:28, 3 replies)

I win.
Life-long outdoor-lighting enthusiast here. Started collecting lanterns at 12. Have taken hundreds of photos of, and am interested in, pretty much all types of outdoor lighting fixtures. Gaslights, hurricane lanterns, vintage mercury, neon and low-pressure sodium streetlights, the works. Have always loved to draw and paint them too.Used to give fantasy names to the different shapes of lanterns as a kid.

Lantern Nut: Geekier than a Linux-loving, Creative-Anachronist anime furry who speaks Klingon AND Esperanto. And pleasures herself with a light saber.

Length? Richardson Candle.
(lanternchikk hat eine schwere Bohlenallergie, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 10:44, 2 replies)

Not shockingly nerdy but....
In secondary school, I ended up teaching some of our IT classes(only stuff like IF statements, Powerpoint, Databases, etc)because the class thought I was a better teacher than the one the school was paying. Odd, because she was the only IT teacher we had who seemed properly qualified to teach the students.
Also, I have seen every page on icanhascheezburger.com
(violent pacifist ;now with 20% more paradox...., Sun 9 Mar 2008, 10:18, 1 reply)

There are 11 types of people.
Those that still think the '10 types of people' joke are funny, those that are sick of it and those that don't get it.
( Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 10:08, Reply)

I have a Spiderman T-shirt.
Actually that's a lie. I have two Spiderman t-shirts. The attention to detail on one of them is needlessly nerdy (designed to emulate Venom; spider logo goes all the way round to the back).

I also have a plush Yoshi.
( Green Spanner and his magical lack of activity, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 9:57, Reply)

Right.
Fair enough, really lovely confessions you all, that's beautiful. But we still haven't found out who's making the pokemon porn. Is it the scientologists?
(sorry., Sun 9 Mar 2008, 9:37, 1 reply)

Oh, and ...
My DCI member number was 000006.

The geeky will know what that means.
(jaredearle There is no spork., Sun 9 Mar 2008, 9:25, 1 reply)

Well ...
I don't change my pants. I swap them out.
(mazo, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 7:33, Reply)

I'm a nerd for books
Seriously. English major in University and everything.

How nerdy, you ask?

I got excited when we read "A Modest Proposal" in Lit class. In fact, I get giddy for most classical works.

I read Animal Farm. For fun.

I boycotted the film Beowulf because it bastardized the poem, which I didn't even like.

I find Shakespeare crude.

I will create crazy-complex sentences in an effort to avoid ending a sentence with a preposition.
(I bape rabies Let's go get Chick-fi-A!, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 6:12, 7 replies)

Lady Geek
My scientific calculator broke, I immediately sent out a twitter to my friends explaining that it must be a sine. (note one geek humor)

I attempted to chat up the guy at the bottle shop and some how ended up telling him that
"the reason I don't use plastic bags is because I'm scared of being persecuted by an imaginary future environmental council" (note two inability to communicate with opposite sex)

Back living with folks, check! (note three inability to hold down permanent accommodation or employment)
(rattus, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 5:58, Reply)

Second Hand geekiness
I shagged a geek and some of it rubbed off! Does that count?
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 4:49, 1 reply)

I am not that nerdy.
The farthest my geekiness goes is being able to take apart electronics. I can fix my blackberry and most treo smart phones.

I also have internet on my phone in which I do 85% of my interneting. Even most of my B3ta posting is done from my phone.

I use around 10,000 texts a month and only around 200 minutes.

I feel lost without my phone.
( postal ninja has Transmissible spongiform encephalopathies, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 3:21, 1 reply)

1337 Johnny Rotten
I'm so nerdy, I was flicking through channels, and noticed this:

img.photobucket.com/albums/v337/Kuling/johnnyrotten1337.jpg

I just had to take a picture, and upload it.
(The Entity Remembered his login details on, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 2:15, Reply)

It's all geek to me.
I was really excited to share that when I clean up around my house, desk, car, etc... I always think "delete" when I pick up an item that needs to go in the bin.

I was also going to mention I can do the amazing feat of translating IP addresses into binary... but only b/c at one point in my awesome telecom career I needed that skill.

I guess I should feel happy I'm not that big of a nerd... but for some reason I'm left cold, inadequate, and shamed.

My only redemption is I wrote a program that will show your IP address in binary when you click "I Like This".
(StupidAmericanTourist, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 1:30, Reply)

Home...
....isn't where the heart is..

..home is where I keep two servers, one a domain controller with added backup capabilities, the other is an exchange server where I host my own email.etc.

The nerdiest thing is... I actually use tapes to backup the things - with a tape rotation system so that at the moment, I can call up an email I sent in 1997.

God Bless the humble DDS3 drive.

P.S - More nerdy goodness to come, including coding Amiga demos to insult schoolfriends, hacking RM Nimbus networks and making my primary headteacher cry when I crashed one of the first ethernet school networks during 'open day'.

P.P.S - Nerd rating might take something of a beating when it's revealled that I left home at 17, got a job and ended up getting married.etc without the use of role playing games.
( HSDriver was probably still at work on, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 1:16, Reply)

Well, I like to...
go on MSN messenger, say

"Enemy BIGMENTALROSS has
used TACKLE"

Then I hit the nudge button so the other person's screen shakes, because that's what happened in Pokemon.
(bigmentalross, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 1:02, Reply)

Right. Here goes.
I spent a month at age 13 committing all the production codes of every Simpsons episode to memory.

Now, if you name an episode that aired between the show's beginning and 2001, I can pretty much give you the production code straight like that.

It was a very odd talent, but that's just something I wanted to do when I was young. It's probably why I didn't have sex until I left school. Then again, it was an All Boys school.
(__, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 0:55, Reply)

Slightly
I know how to use selotape; superglue; and a pencil to join the L1 bridges on the old duron cpus. I have a small collection of various processors including 2 1ghz mobile durons, one of which has never been used, some various speed durons, a thunderbird or 3 and an old clawhammer. I also water cooled my cpu for a few years. I also know lot's of boring/random/pointless stuff such as how to work what rating fuse to use in a plug, and basics of string theory and the fact that electrons travel in the opposite direction to what most people think electricity travels. I also read several online comics.

I think my duron collection is the most nerdy thing about me. At one time I wanted to collect one of every speed and put them in a display case in order.
(. ., Sun 9 Mar 2008, 0:13, 1 reply)

From memory...
... and fairly drunk:
012700
174400
012760
000013
012710
000004
105710
100376
005060
000002
005060
000004
012760
177400
000006
012710
000014
105710
100376
000000
001000g

Free bottle of Innis & Gunn to the first person who replies with what this is
(gordonjcp, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 0:10, 5 replies)

Email Retentivness
I've kept every email I've ever sent or received - less the spam.

Because of this, I've found my original B3ta login. Huzzah!

It turns out that I've been a member here for over 6 years! That's one fifth of my life...

I've spent SIX BLOODY YEARS looking at kittens and badly animated cocks.
(Terry, Sat 8 Mar 2008, 23:39, 1 reply)

Hello
Just seen rob manuel on bbc three ,most annoying pop moments, yay to rob.
(andycrass loves two hats on, Sat 8 Mar 2008, 23:27, 2 replies)

Nerdy enough
I have long had a love-hate relationship with my nerd self.

I have been playing computer games since I was 6, first on the old apples and then on the 286. Commander Keen we downloaded over a baud modem from the then mystical and wonderful Apogee site. I remember the first download (that game), and how interesting the little equals signs appearing one after the other were. My first major loading screen experience was so full of anticipation!!

Programming in Q-Basic when I was 8 was soon what I got on to. I created a birthday program for a friend.

When I was 14 I attempted Java, and when I was 15 I began my website business. Not actually knowing too much about the whole domain/hosting/ecommerce thing I still went boldly forward and got my first sale at the first place I went to. Unfortunately this was also an e-commerce site. Without much more than a little prior experience in QBasic, Java, and HTML I was given this amazingly complex task yet managed to get through it and provided the company with a reasonable rate of return.

I went on from there to do TAFE (IT), and Uni (IT). I played as many games as I could, spent most of my earnings on new computer parts (a result of which was that I didn't get a car or a license until I was 20), networked a new house we built, and learned assembly, PHP, MySQL, Javascript, CSS, AJAX, Ruby on Rails, and many more (mostly self-taught except for assembly) in the process.

Software and hardware hold absolutely no mystery to me and I am a strong advocate of Linux, though I don't mind Mac and Windows XP when I have to use them. I've installed Linux on most of my family's computers and refuse to give most of them XP except the ones who need it. I can access all their computers with SSH shell access and remotely administer them.

Not only this but I teach multimedia (2D Animation and Web Development) at the local TAFE now.

I am a fan of Firefly, Stargate, Buffy, Angel, Red Dwarf, and Weird al Yankovic.

Good going all this - you might think that I am the nerd many people think I am.

However! Hold your breath guys, because:

1. I steadfastly refuse to play RPGs or MMORPGs
2. I have never played Dungeons and Dragons nor do I wish to
3. I've seen but don't really want to watch Star Wars again, as I don't like it. I'm not interested in Star Trek either.
4. I am an avid surfer (love the beach), tennis player, jogger, soccer player, instrumentalist, swing dancer, and entrepreneur, and speaking to girls is not my problem. Working since I was 10 on several of my own businesses I quickly became used to rejection as one of my past-times was going door-to-door drumming up sales. It helps to swing dance too - you quickly lose the ability to choke up when holding many girls in one night and being given open slather to throw them about as you wish...

I am the kind of 'nerd' who can just as easily speak sports, cars, and girls with any of the guys, yet can also speak to the nerdiest guy you can find about the benefits of the transition from baud modems to the 28.8K.

So... what am I? Am I the new breed of nerd? Am I nerd in disguise, or a wannabe nerd?? Please people, help me answer these questions once and for all!!?!??
(satellite blows, Sat 8 Mar 2008, 22:30, 4 replies)

Like to think......
........ I fit the bill

I read comics (check out The Walking Dead)
I'm into photography

I was thinking of more, but actually, that'll do.
(RickGrimes Quite frankly, disappointed on, Sat 8 Mar 2008, 22:14, 1 reply)

Trainspotting...
...I mean, why?
(thatblokeoverthere not quite as much an arsehole as I thought, Sat 8 Mar 2008, 22:14, 3 replies)

I've written games quizzes for a university games society
They included the following questions:

- Name any race featured in X-Com: Enemy Unknown*

- Meseta is the fictional currency found in which series of games?

- What is the only way to kill Guybrush Threepwood, protagonist of the Monkey Island series?

- On what date was the Sega Mega Drive released in Europe?**

- Which desert was it alleged that millions of unsold copies of E.T. for the Atari 2600 were buried in a landfill?

- What was the name of the team the player was part of in Night Trap?***

...and for a particuarly cruel round, quizzers had to put 10 game-to-movie conversions in the order of their rating on IMDB. Geeky and sadistic. :)

*The amusing part being that you could include Human as an answer.
**Scaringly enough, someone got this exactly right. I suspect mobile internet usage
*** Sega Control Attack Team (lol SCAT)

EDIT: Can I tempt anyone to go clicky with the promise of posting the rest of the quiz?
( Iki I think my camel is dead., Sat 8 Mar 2008, 21:13, 7 replies)