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This is a question How nerdy are you?

This week Gary Gygax, co-creator of Dungeons and Dragons, died. A whole generation of pasty dice-obsessed nerds owes him big time. Me included.

So, in his honour, how nerdy were you? Are you still sunlight-averse? What are the sad little things you do that nobody else understands?

As an example, a B3ta regular who shall remain nameless told us, "I spent an entire school summer holiday getting my BBC Model B computer to produce filthy stories from an extensive database of names, nouns, adjectives, stock phrases and deviant sexual practices. It revolutionised the porn magazine dirty letter writing industry for ever.

Revel in your own nerdiness.

(, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 10:32)
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This question is now closed.

Audio samples?
Am I the only one who notices when adverts/programmes/films use the same audio sample, which has obviously been taken out of a generic bank of shitty, cheap sound samples.

Such classics as the kids running around laughter, this is THE worst, and can be found in countless adverts like the one with the talking house selling you mortgages, and most recently I noticed in Rambo 4 (I think its 4, the new one.. It's shit anyway).
The squeaky iron gate which never quite matches up with the movement of the gate on screen. Ok That’s all I can think of at the moment, I'm sure you all know what i mean.
Is it geeky to notice this, or even worse to get quite annoyed when I hear them? I consider over doing repetition of any kind in music or audio a form of torture, and i have to put up with radio1 at work, you wouldnt believe the pissy mood that puts me in.
Other than that, and the crushing lack of self esteem, the occasional mmorpg, unhealthy amount of time in front of a computer, jumbo porn collection, lack of girlfriend for 5 years, I'm fairly normal.

I have a cousin who still has a recording of me aged 5 (22 now) shouting my name into his god knows what computer & similar sequencer program backed up on a floppy along with 20 years worth of other stuff on countless disks, cataloguing it would seem his entire life of computer usage.. Now that's pretty impressive.
Pop, Girth etc. /relurk
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 14:55, 6 replies)
I get righteously incensed
By the rancid fanboy-opportunism of the mere idea of the 'Aliens Vs Predator' franchise.

That nerdy enough for you?

(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 14:35, 1 reply)
Well now
I met my lovely girlfriend after butting into her conversation on the relative merits of Schrodinger's advancements in the field of quantum mechanics with my observation that Big JCM laid the groundwork for the entire field (plus special relativity) with his Distributions and Equations. I was 17 at the time.

I have spent over 800 hours on Elder Scrolls games over the last 3 years, and easily 600 on the Baldur's Gate series. I now have RSI in my right arm, however I feel this is a small price to pay for what were the formative experiences of my (ongoing) youth.

I enjoy experimental cinema, especially foreign. Tarkovsky is my favourite director by a country mile; this explains why I can play through the entireity of STALKER and most of Solyaris in my head.

I own 600Gb of music on two USB harddrives, much of it stupidly obscure and foreign. One recently corrupted and I wept over it like a dead child before spending around 10 hours nursing my data back to life.

I dual boot XP Pro with Gentoo, and the only non-open source programs I own are games. I have also been using 'puters since age 7 when my mother attempted to teach me basic FORTRAN to keep me out of her hair.

I think I'm the only person in the world who actually enjoys learning organic chemistry (oooh, phenol) and quantum physics (although I'm crap at the maths involved :()

I know my Heechee from my Xeelee and my Starks from my Farseers, and spend hours discussing the relative merits of such things with the aforementioned lovely girlfriend and on various forums.

I plan meticulously for every eventuality, occasionally using ooBase to correlate everything. Ask me to make a decision and you'll be instructed to wait 2-4 hours while I work at it.

Everyone I have ever met (almost without exception) has used the word 'eccentric' to describe me at some point, including my parents.

Flipping the coin, I have a vibrant social life, have had carnal knowledge of the opposite sex, supposedly have a 'decent' fashion sense and I enjoy few things more than going out on the weekend, imbibing various mood enhancers and having a right old laugh with my mates.

Am I or aren't I?
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 14:21, 1 reply)
God I can't beleive I'm going to admit this...
... but once I considered turning up to one of these events

Edit: OK, I was worried that nobody would like me really
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 13:55, 2 replies)
Nerdy??? the word you are lookign for is coooool
I hate people who wore those shitty plastic wristbands....that is until I found out they made Zelda ones.

I bought 2 in case I losst one

I think that makes me super cool
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 13:51, 2 replies)
I'm the only one....
in a class of 36 who knew what the Borg were. I have never felt so many disown me at once.
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 13:25, 3 replies)
Spreadsheets of joy and joyfulness
Yay! First ever post, have been waiting impatiently for a week after registering just to add my nerdy story to this question.

I have holiday spreadsheets. Nothing comes on holiday with me unless it has been put on to a spreadsheet first. There are different pages for each event and basic templates for different lengths of time (Overnight, Weekend, Week, Fortnight, Month, Week including Camping, Foreign...you get the idea!) Each page has various categories (Cosmetics, Electrical, Handbag, Clothes etc...)

These spreadsheets are reviewed frequently and printed out for EVERY holiday so the little boxes can get their 'check!'

I've never forgotten anything thanks to these lists and should I ever need to refer back to them I have all of them in my archive holiday spreadsheet folder. (Because I will need to refer back to them, I will)

Believe it or not, I actually relax once I'm on the holiday. (Mainly because I've pre-printed every routeplanner to get to every destination I may possibly need but that's another story)

I feel better having shared and realise how anal I sound. Thank you for listening, be kind!

Length? Depends which tab you choose at the bottom of your spreadsheet!
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 13:10, 10 replies)
one of my catchphrases is
"the book's always better" whenever we go to see any sort of film.

but it's ALWAYS true! anyone who saw captain corelli's mandolin would never bother to read what is a truly outstanding book. and harry potter? some of the best books ever? what is that "acting" all about? and they cut out the best bits...

and don't get me started on things where they change the ending and the title like "animal husbandry" (dumbed down to "animal attraction" and given a wholly unrealistic crappy happy ending) or anne of green gables (call that red hair?)...

i can feel my heart about to burst...
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 12:58, 28 replies)
I once attended a Linux User Group meeting
in a pub.

Admittedly, not much was talked about Linux. I left after 10 pints of very good ale and woke up on a park bench.
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 12:44, 1 reply)
I started a new job in January...
...and I'm not allowed on the internet at all while I'm at w*rk.

I'm really missing b3ta, is that nerdy?

Also, I'm posting this from my mobile, but Jessie tells me that's quite a common occurence...
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 12:42, 2 replies)
I'm a music nerd...
When I'm listening to music I'm constantly bombarding my girlfriend with tales of how "the guitarist in this band went on to be the singer in that band, and was also credited with writing that song by another band, which was in fact about the drummer from the band we're actually listening to now!"

I'm sure I'm the only person who finds stuff like that interesting...
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 12:38, 7 replies)
i have in the past
Participated in LRP.

*hides face in shame*
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 12:33, Reply)
I too am an Excel nerd...
...played D&D as a kid but never really got into the whole I.T thing until a few years ago when I discovered Excel; now I get excited about using VBA to automate anything I can. However, I would describe myself as an "enthusiast". If nerds are like the Scouts, I'm definitely a cub....not quite there yet.
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 12:31, Reply)
Excel fun
I once wrote a formula for Excel which, when pasted into Word (makes it easier to check), was a whopping 53 lines long.

Unfortunately this was a bit too much for Excel to handle. While not the proudest moment of my life it was by far the highlight of that particular week.
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 11:59, 1 reply)
Just a list really. More of a part-time geek I suppose.

- Saw Jurassic Park 7 times in the cinema
- Have read Lord of the Rings about 10 times. And the Silmarillion 5 times.
- Know all the words to the original Stars Wars trilogy and the first two Alien films
- Am an avid Call of Duty (not CoD2 as it was shite) fan and online gamer.
- Completed all the endings to Crono Trigger (anyone else?)
- Collect anime movies
- Design game/forum sigs and avatars
- Can quite easily listen to/or watch the bbc commentary online (e.g. ball-by-ball comments) for a whole day

On the flip side:

- Played rugby for my county
- Practiced traditional Samurai martial arts
- Play cricket
- Surf and snowboard
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 11:59, 9 replies)
Not me
but I had to post this...

(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 11:52, 3 replies)
Reverse Engineering
Er well I reverse engineered a bit of number crunching software once. Had to use polar co-ordinates! Then wrote three or four BASIC versions for different computers and even one for a programmable calculator.

OK, does caving count? I like steam engines, I do, I do!!
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 11:39, Reply)
What do Engineers use as a contraceptive?

Their Personality...
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 11:27, 3 replies)
Geek Jokes
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 10:00, Reply)
Does this count?
I'm obsessed with making my PC faster, better, larger, quieter and more brightly lit than it was the previous week. This has so far cost me thousands in motherboards, processors, graphics cards, cold cathodes and water cooling to name but a few....

Nothing wrong with that you may think...the nerdyness really comes to the fore when I take it apart on an almost weekly basis to vacuum out the accumulated dust and polish the chrome on the heatsinks before putting all back together again with a slightly different arrangement to the cables and cooling pipes. Am I the only person who Autoglym's their PC case???

This has only become the norm since my wife left me in November...

Got to get the dremel out and make another window in my case!
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 9:48, 2 replies)
Following up Harry Potter double entendres
My favourite bit from The Order of the Phoenix:

Harry extracted his stiffening wand and waved it in Hermione's face.

"Oh, Harry! I'd like to take that fully in my mouth," she said.

"Do it!" pleaded Harry. "Swallow those magic inches."

Hermione opened wet lips and groaned as the hardness slid over her tongue, deeper and deeper until it gently grazed her tonsils. She closed her lips around it and began to suck.

'Mirabilis magna!" shouted Harry, as a stream of molten magic pulsed forth from his wand, lashing across Hermione's tongue. She withdrew the wand and let the still jetting magic streak her fluttering eyelashes.

"What's going on here?" enquired Ron, entering the room with his own wand swollen and heavy.

"Do me - both of you!" moaned Hermione from the animal centre of her soul.

If that isn't what I think it is, then I must be some kind of twisted pervert.
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 9:34, 7 replies)
Ogwen69's post below about cat's eyes reminded me
You know when you're travelling along a motorway and sometimes you hit the rumble strip at the edge, resulting in a musical note coming off the tyres?

Well, I had an idea once to design rumble strips such that the ridges on them changed in frequency so they would play a tune as you drove over them. You could even have two strips, set apart the width of a car's track, so the right hand wheels would play the melody and the left hand ones a bass line. There would of course be issues attached to this: for example, there would be some slurring of notes between the front and back wheels; the tunes may not be to everyone's taste and it probably would result in increased suspension and tyre wear.

But it would be fun to try it. In a nerdy kind of way.
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 9:24, 4 replies)
Oh - I've remembered another one
I built 2 robots and got onto TV twice for Robot Wars (the dutch version)
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 8:19, 1 reply)
im uber geekz0rz

(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 8:16, Reply)
Some people are really into this fantasy stuff.
And some just take the fucking biscuit.
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 5:15, 1 reply)
I go storm chasing
on the plains of America, fastidiously studing charts and radar.

Still haven't seen a sodding tornado.
(, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 4:58, 1 reply)

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