Factaroni
It doesnt cost phone companies a penny for you to send a text its a long process but here we go.

every mobile phone sends a signal out 1500 a second to connec tto the nearest signal tower so when you send a text it gets put into one of the 1500 signals thats being sent so they don;t have to pay for opening up a channel for you to communicate because theres a permanent one open for signalling.

Soooooo they still charge 12p when they shouldnt't!
The Bastards
(NuffMuff fucks shrubbery, Tue 25 Nov 2008, 10:12, 8 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Time for fact of the day
Four of the red and white Ford Torinos used in the filming of Starsky and Hutch are now owned by the Archbishop of Canterbury.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 25 Nov 2008, 9:03, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

bash.org
"IronChef Foicite: well, there's a lot of reasons
IronChef Foicite: i mean, roses only last like a couple weeks
IronChef Foicite: and that's if you leave them in water
IronChef Foicite: and they really only exist to be pretty
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying
IronChef Foicite: "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance"
IronChef Foicite: but a potato!
IronChef Foicite: potatos last for fucking ever, man
IronChef Foicite: in fact, not only will they not rot, they actually grow shit even if you just leave them in the sack
IronChef Foicite: that part alone makes it a good symbol
IronChef Foicite: but there's more!
IronChef Foicite: there are so many ways to enjoy a potato! you can even make a battery with it!
IronChef Foicite: and that's like saying "i have many ways in which I show my love for you"
IronChef Foicite: and potatos may be ugly, but they're still awesome
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying "it doesn't matter at all what you look like, I'll still love you"



Do you think it'll go down well if I tell the SO that I love him like a potato?
(Holy Gabrielle is Holy, Tue 25 Nov 2008, 8:55, 6 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Moaning


Ergh Illness is not FTW.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 25 Nov 2008, 7:53, 278 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I've just had a lovely b3ta moment
in a thread on Skug's status on Facebook.

Feel the love b3tans, feel the love.
(man_d is being watched by experts on, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 21:40, Reply)

I'm not posting this in links
since pr0n links are a no-no. But I do feel the need to share this with people.

My friend Laura, who is a huge fan of youporn, showed me this video of two people getting dirty with each other whilst absailing down a cliff.

I decided to try and find something even more obscure, and came across "Asian Drumming Sex".

If anyone else has seen this, would you mind explaining to me what the hell it's all about? Is it traditional to be banged like a drum whilst banging drums?
(GONEism, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 19:36, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Sorry to nick ideas, but I want some b3ta medical advice too...
I'm asthmatic, and flying to America in a couple of weeks. Am I likely to need a doctors note to prove that my inhaler isn't some kind of teeny tiny bomb? I did ask one pharmacist who reckons I won't need anything but terrifyingly, I've grown to trust you lot more than medical proffessionals.
(GONEism, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 18:40, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Doc Doc Doc Doc Doctor B3t... a
I dont suppose anyone has any medical experience? Im quite a hypochondriac but Ive been getting strange stomatch pains for the past few months now and now Im starting to get worried.

Basically its like a stabbing pain that lasts for 2-5mins. I usually get it about once every few weeks and theres nothing that triggers it, it just happens.

Usually Im ok with it and I just wait for it to go away, its just an inconvenience, but today it was quite crippling and now Im getting scared.

And obviously Id come here rather than actually going to a real doctor who knows what he's talking about...


EDIT: Actually if I think about it I can get them if Im sat down/have been eating. But only sometimes.
(i should have joined myspace, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 18:16, 15 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Evening all
It's evening time, it got dark ridiculously early, and the day thread was making my internet slow.

How are we all this fine evening?


(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 17:42, 204 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Cooking time
was this weekend. I found out something quite valuable.

I seem to be incapable of cooking reasonable amounts of food.

I wanted some nice fresh bread with dinner, said dinner being spaghetti with sausage. So I cooked up one of my normal pots of spaghetti sauce and made a batch of bread dough per Joy of Cooking, to which I added rosemary from my garden, about a cup of parmesan and a cup of cheddar.

What I didn't process was that this makes two full-sized loaves.

There's only one of me.

One loaf is currently in the freezer, to be taken with me at Thanksgiving for all of us to eat. I brought the remainder of the other one in to work and left it on the counter with a note to please take it while it's fresh- and it vanished in less than an hour.

I need to start thinking smaller scale for cooking.

Feck.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 24 Nov 2008, 16:51, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Any trumpet players on here?
my daughter has a trumpet exam tomorrow and has only just remembered to tell me that the trumpet needs oil. As the school doesn't supply the instruments, they don't keep supplies of oil, either.

The nearest stockist is a good hour away and closes at 5, so no chance of getting there! The only alternatives I can come up with are (a) WD40 or (b) cooking oil. I have a feeling that neither of these would do the trumpet much good. Can anyone suggest anything (helpful)?

*crosses fingers*

If all else fails, she'll just have to be nice to the only other person sitting the exam tomorrow in the hope of scrounging some. These girls have been at daggers drawn since primary one, so I don't fancy her chances, there.
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Mon 24 Nov 2008, 16:29, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

On Saturday
a man dressed as a policeman waggled his gun at me. He wanted me to let him into the building I'd just left, so I asked to see some ID - he said 'the uniform and gun ought to be enough'. Being British, and therefore wary of gun waggling nitwits, I let him into the building he wanted into.

I told one of my colleagues this earlier today, and was told that I should have demanded to see ID, and not let him in, as it's a crime to waggle a gun at me - therefore I have just spent the best part of this morning talking to the university police, and will be speaking to more of them later.

But what the fuck else was I supposed to do? If someone waves a gun at you, do you tell them to piss off, demand to see better ID, or do exactly what they want you to do?

Bloody America.
( ascorbate, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 16:11, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Drinking Heroes…
I just saw TheRiddlers’ post on QotW regarding violence whilst watching ‘Friends’ and it reminded me of a game I invented* for the popular TV show ‘Heroes’

The rules are really quite simple:

RULE 1 – (the most important rule): Get fucking great wadges of beer.
RULE 2: Put ‘Heroes’ on

Then…

Every time you see the Heroes ‘squiggly sign’ thing – you take a gulp.
Claire the cheerleader: Every time you see her you have a wank drink (X2 when she gets injured).
If someone’s eyes go all ‘white’ – drinkeepoos
Every time you hear the word ‘Future’ – glug away
Every time you see a cockroach, you have to down your pint – (You’d be surprised – especially in the first 2 series)

This happy pastime has helped drag me blurrily through many an episode of this fine programme. I hope those involved with it’s creation are proud to know that their talent, hard work and efforts regularly help me get slightly more shitfaced than usual of a night.

Can anybody think of some extra rules? Or another programme that can be put to the ‘drinking game’ sword?...I have some ideas for ‘Scrubs’…



*Disclaimer: Well, I thought I invented it. Although (for what it’s worth) I promise you that I independently came up with the rules above…in preparation for posting this I thought to myself ‘I wonder if anyone else has thought of a Heroes drinking game?’ So I googled it…and it appears that… surprise-fucking-surprise…yes they have.

Flangeboils.
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Mon 24 Nov 2008, 15:18, 11 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

It's the pm, it's cold, I have half a toffee crisp in my drawers and I'm ready for lurve!
I think I might become mysteriously ill tomorrow. Anybody want to help put together a mass b3ta sickie?
(GONEism, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 13:52, 12 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Fact of the Day
4% of Welsh sheep have, at one point or another, been married to humans
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 13:05, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I didnt know this
..that there is such a term as shipping.

Does anyone else think its the creepiest, most disturbing, worrying and downright frightening thing to do? I mean, ffs, who the FUCK decides to call, say, Jack and Kate (from lost) Jate??

It creeps me out, I shiver when I see these phrases. People are fucking weird man.

Some context: io9.com/5091600/why-isnt-terminator-the-new-lost

in which the term is used as if it is common parlance. Its freaky. I mean spider-crawling-over-my-face-freaky.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 13:01, Reply)

'scuse me while I kiss this guy.
Have you ever misheard lyrics to your, or anyone else's, amusement?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 12:49, 18 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Strange stirrings in my loins
I've been feeling broody lately. A LOT.
What's a girl to do?
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 10:33, 30 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Something terrible happened to me this morn
I talk/shout in my sleep which more often than not wakes me up.

Unfortunately this morning I was having a sex dream (hooray) and made an exceedingly loud noise thus waking me up.. And causing my father to run into the room demanding to know what was going on from a rather confused/sleepy/disorientated me.

What did I say to him?

'Ohhh.. I thought I was having sex..?!!?'

No wonder they favour my brother over me..
(i should have joined myspace, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 8:45, 4 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Wozzup you cheeky little monkeys?
Am I still anyone's leader?
(GONEism, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 8:21, 8 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Well it's my birthday.
And I have some work to do.
Isn't life just a twat in the face sometimes.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 24 Nov 2008, 8:02, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

It's Monday again already :(

( wanderlust, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 8:00, 332 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

does anyone here
play Gmod? just out of interest. I'm looking for a new server, the sandpit has a bit of a follock that somehow became a respected, whenever he's on he deletes everyone's stuff and fires rollermines all over the place. every once in a while he crashes the server. so anyway, anyone care to suggest a new server?
(venort apparently exists, Mon 24 Nov 2008, 7:08, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Two things which frightened me this weekend.
1. The ex-girlfriend and love of my life is heavily pregnant. It's not mine. :(

2. Was watching T4 this morning, and in the credits for the Orange Unsigned Acts show there was a James Moriarty.
(DeactivateThisDisaster No., Sun 23 Nov 2008, 20:01, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Fact of the Day
Autumn is called Fall in North America because 70% of children aged between 5 and 16 cannot spell Autumn properly.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Sun 23 Nov 2008, 11:56, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Help?
Me and a friend are going on a road trip around England next week. We haven't actually decided where to go yet though...
We've been looking on teh net for any places that might be interesting to visit, markets/ fairs/ museum type places... but can't really find anything.
So I was wondering if any of you lovely people know of any places that might be good?
( Mellicious is made of candy, Sun 23 Nov 2008, 11:47, 22 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Time for a Sunday thread


Well I had a good time last night. The lady I met was good company and today I feel ready to get on and tackle some of the things on my many lists. Life is good.
( Captain V, Sun 23 Nov 2008, 10:43, 209 replies, latest was 16 years ago)