Whilst at Uni I was taught by Dennis Leigh aka John Foxx and founding member of Ultravox
He told me the story of a Professor James Kinsley and how he testified in court that the word bollocks was not obscene and in doing so prevented the sex pistols album being banned.

More recently I discovered that Professor James Kinsley is the Grandfather of one of our very own OT regulars.

Have any of your ancestors done anything of note? Do you have famous or infamous blood coursing through your veins? or were they all a bunch of cunts just like you and I?

Hurry now you have 51 minutes before we have to start talking about food.
( Peej, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:09, 112 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

All of my ancestors have done something of note.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:13, Reply)

So then why are you such a worthless nobody?

( Peej, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:17, Reply)

It makes life so much easier than if I were a successful somebody.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:18, Reply)

Love you really but I haven't forgiven you for calling me a cunt the other day
so until I call you one back I will sit here wallowing in self pity, brewing hatred for everything that is Noel.
( Peej, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:21, Reply)

Ahem.
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1054748
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:28, Reply)

Oh then it appears we are even and I can put our differences aside
Reach Around?
( Peej, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:30, Reply)

Sure, why not.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:34, Reply)

You been stalking Monty again?
I think a great grandma on my German side was raped by a nutter who escaped from a mental institution.
( girlinthehole, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:13, Reply)

Did she give birth to Freddy Kruger?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:15, Reply)

Yes, my grandmother.

( girlinthehole, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:16, Reply)

Freddy Krueger Monty
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:16, Reply)

My great great great great great great great great great great grandad

Fucked your great great great great great great great great great great grandmother
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:13, Reply)

Apparently my great, great, great grand-daughter
will be pretty fine.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:16, Reply)

hahaha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:16, Reply)

I know it's only a song
But I used to get wound up that they thought three generations spread over 1000 year was some how likely. Perhaps they should rerelease it with the lyrics "And your Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Granddaughter is pretty fine"
( Peej, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:19, Reply)

I had assumed that spectacular life extending techniques had just been completely glossed over,
based on the line "Not much has changed, but they live underwater."
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:26, Reply)

This also annoyed me
That and the fact that the song was unbelievably fucking shit
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:26, Reply)

Was it really?
Then why do you have a busted tattoo on your arse then?
( Peej, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:28, Reply)

It states the permanent condition of his ringpiece.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:29, Reply)

POTD!

( Peej, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:29, Reply)

Seconded.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:32, Reply)

Repitition of "then"
If you must bookend your sentences please purchase a Thesaurus

/failed attempt to divert attention from excellent gay jibe above
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:30, Reply)

I'll repeat whatever I feel like you limp wristed, tutu wearing, bumboy

( Peej, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:33, Reply)

My Great-mothers
Own great-grandmother served with Florence Nightingale in the Crimean war.

Did she get her picture on a bank-note? Did she fuck.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:16, Reply)

My great-great-grandfather went on every one of Stanley's expeditions
except the one where he found Dr Livingstone.

So no.

edit: or it might have been Livingstone's expeditions, I forget. But he definitely wasn't at the famous meeting.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:16, Reply)

My ancestors were a bunch of rabble-rousers
on both sides.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:16, Reply)

I am so, so fucking smug I think I might burst.
www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_13?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=james+kinsley&sprefix=james+kinsley

352 results on Amazon, not bad for someone dead since '84.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:22, Reply)

My ancestor brought democracy to this septred isle

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:25, Reply)

But not spelling, it seems.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:26, Reply)

No, but he was French so can be forgiven

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:31, Reply)

....for absolutely nothing, the smelly Vichy cunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:33, Reply)

Are french cunts ever not smelly?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:34, Reply)

Only one - Vanessa Paradis's.
If I got hold of her she'd be flagging down a 'Joe le Taxi' to get her to a rape clinic quick-smart, I can tell you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:37, Reply)

Carla Bruni?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:44, Reply)

I'd do her up the broon-eye

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:48, Reply)

Get in line

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:49, Reply)

And who is this?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:37, Reply)

He is my grandfather, referred to in the original post.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:44, Reply)

A woman I work (and share a birthday) with is Peter Ebdon's sister
I'm impatient, so I'll tell you now that I'm eating a home-made celeriac bhaji. How many of you here assembled can say the same? Or would want to?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:25, Reply)

You've really set the family name on fire now, how will future generations ever hope to best being on the weakest link?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:28, Reply)

That's nowt
My Dad won a car on Wheel of Fortune in 1988.

He's also been on Countdown, Mastermind, Jim'll Fix It, Fifteen to One (five times including the grand final) and countless other little cable TV quiz shows.

But he only came second on the Weakest Link.

Fuck yeah.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:32, Reply)

A blue plaque awaits that man, believe

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:33, Reply)

Yeah?
Well in the 80s we took a lodger whose husband had just left her - and then won the Krypton Factor - he was 'super person of the year' or something. That cheered her up, the po-faced bitch.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:34, Reply)

Yeah? well in the early 00s
The pub I worked in had a regular who was chatting up a guy all night. After they left he took her round the corner and raped and murdered her in a phone box. Mind you she'd probably have rather have come second on Krypton Factor.
( Peej, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:36, Reply)

Look I was pissed alright?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:37, Reply)

I told you not to wear that dress.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:40, Reply)

Do you honestly think
I would take dress choice advice from YOU of all people?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:43, Reply)

Ah, the Krypton Factor. Classic ITV
Our generation is so far devolved from twenty years ago that whereas once you had to complete an assault course, solve logic- and memory-based puzzles and answer general knowledge questions to gain the respect of your peers, now you just have to scramble through an Argentinian water park whilst Richard Hammond laughs at you.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:44, Reply)

I fucking love Total Wipeout.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:46, Reply)

I reckon I might win that next

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:49, Reply)

You'd win 'Total Wanker'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:55, Reply)

By your standards
this is very poor indeed
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:55, Reply)

Don't forget you had to land a fucking PLANE
Can't do that nowadays...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:46, Reply)

I had forgotten that
How long before there's an image challenge entry involving that simulator and the Twin Towers?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:49, Reply)

and tonight on The Kyrgyzstan Factor

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:51, Reply)

Hahaha
Very good
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:55, Reply)

Nothing really, my family is fairly dull in terms of being famous.
Although my brother is best friends with a certain TV personality who worked on a program with the initials AA. (oddly amused by that thoroughly unplanned link)
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:40, Reply)

Anal Adventures?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:42, Reply)

Wrong brother, sorry!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:42, Reply)

Jesus built my hotrod

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:41, Reply)

WAHWAHCHIGGACHIGAWAHWAH
etc.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:42, Reply)

all that was left for me to do was to
dingadingdang my dangalonglinglong
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:44, Reply)

Excellent work. All of you.

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:44, Reply)

Alright chief
How're tricks?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:59, Reply)

hard to say at the moment
am back in my office today. the mood is a bit subdued. stupid thing is, we seem to have loads of work on at the moment, and yet this big redundancy shadow is looming very close.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

Because you have the vocabulary of a sloth on valium?
Edit: Ah I see, I can understand why that'd be rather shitty then.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:09, Reply)

I pressed enter instead of tab :-P

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:10, Reply)

A Ford Ka can in no way be considered a hotrod.
And should you have been amusingly referring to your "hot rod", I'd suggest that having it put together by a fictional, dead and above all celibate Jew is the reason you have to spend your weekends "tuning it up" rather than "taking it out for a spin".
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:01, Reply)

Hahaha!
Dan Brown says Jesus wasn't celibate though...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:05, Reply)

The mere thought of Dan Brown has made me too cross to think of a better reply than
FUCK YOU.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:10, Reply)

Wow, this trolling lark really gets results!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:12, Reply)

my grandfather flew tank carrying gliders in WWII
my other grandfather was one of the people responsible for Readybrek
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:47, Reply)

Flying tanks eh?
A likely story.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:51, Reply)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/General_Aircraft_Hamilcar
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:54, Reply)

That was a less-than-veiled criticism of your shocking punctuation more than anything else.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:59, Reply)

yeah, I chose to ignore it

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:07, Reply)

One of my ancestors developed something he called a CYbernetic LifefOrm Node
Apparently the family name of Greystone was changed shortly thereafter
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:48, Reply)

*Geeky smile*

(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:58, Reply)

you are both battlestar ga-spack-ticas

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:07, Reply)

*highfives*

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

I'm cool with that.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:12, Reply)

By virtue of liking BSG
Chompy and I are better than you.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:13, Reply)

All my ancestors are Sussex ponces or petty criminals.
When my Dad has had a few drinks he likes to tell stories about how he worked with the Kray twins personal bookmaker. Apparently he threatened to burn down my Dad's rival bookmakers in Brighton.
(Charmander, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:50, Reply)

Sure he didn't just offer to make it a little more 'flaming'?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:51, Reply)

And I thought I'd heard all the jokes about my hometown.
Good one.
(Charmander, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:53, Reply)

That doesn't sound like petty crime...
My Dad (allegedly) once blew up an old water tower outside Winchester, died his school swimming pool purple, and toured random parts of Russia in a blues band.
My Mum doesn't talk much about her past, which means she was boring or she's killed people.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:53, Reply)

I'd assume the most interesting one.
I should say it wasn't Father Charmander who was the wannabe arsonist. Don't want to get my family in trouble on the internet.
(Charmander, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:56, Reply)

Good plan
How are you?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:59, Reply)

Drowning in work, not happy.
And you sir?
(Charmander, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:00, Reply)

Not drowning in work, hence I'm here
Other than that I'm grand thanks.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:01, Reply)

The amount of work I have to do bears no correlation to whether I'll be on here on not.
At this point I'm too lazy to feel guilty.
(Charmander, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:05, Reply)

I know full well how that feels
I have to be extremely busy at work to not be on here :/
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:06, Reply)

Alright?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:14, Reply)

I've only just realised who Charmander is.
People on the internet should wear name tags.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:19, Reply)

I'm very well. Yourself?
I was in your area of London last night, pretending a cage with a light bulb in it was art.
(Charmander, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:23, Reply)

Maybe she killed boring people?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:58, Reply)

I am related to
Lancelot "Capability" Brown and Jeremy Bentham, or Uncle Jez as he's know in our house.

What up bitches?
( wanderlust, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:53, Reply)

I studied Bentham at uni!
Alright darlin'!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:54, Reply)

I have to disappear back to the bar again now.
Sad times :(

Be good without me...

Toodles.
( wanderlust, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:55, Reply)

ham sex
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:56, Reply)

Creative, I'll give you that
It's also partly true, them Ancient Greek fellas loved a bit of that.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 11:58, Reply)

-sighs-
-taps foot-
-probably shouldn't give a lecture on why you're wrong-
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:06, Reply)

Thought that comment might get a rise out of you ;)

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

There's manlove, yes, but NOT HOW YOU THINK
I'll corner you and talk gay for about 20mins at some point
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:09, Reply)

Thanks
I read a little about it (in the Symposium).
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:11, Reply)

I recommend Love Sex and Tragedy by Simon Goldhill, just as a general read.
It's a great and fascinating book.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:14, Reply)

Have they made a film of it?
Or a computer game?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:22, Reply)

No.
I guess you're not interested, then.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:23, Reply)

I'm interested in you telling me about it next time I see you

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:25, Reply)

I'll burble on about some sort of shit.
My brain hasn't started working yet.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:30, Reply)

My relatives are interesting but not famous.
My grandfather discovered something funny about pepper seeds. And great grandfather won the Iron Cross.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

I'm related to Jeremy Beadle
on the other hand I have an enormous cock
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 2 Feb 2011, 12:09, Reply)