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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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That thread is old and fucking shit or a bit 'Monty' as we say
Soup is it food?

ALT: I won £22.50 at the dogs the other day, tell me of your betting triumphs or failures.
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:30, 91 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
I have a 100% success rate on the horses.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:32, Reply)
Is that how you buy so many shoes and televisons?
Or are you saying that you've never bet in your life?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:32, Reply)
Bet on four races, won them all.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:36, Reply)
I have a 75% rate on the Grand National

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:41, Reply)
I have 100% success rate on the Grand National

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:50, Reply)
I lost last year
went for win and it came second
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:55, Reply)
I hate putting bets on anyway.
On the rare occasions I win the first thing I think is (say I put a fiver on) "I should have bet a tenner". I'm a greedy cunt.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:52, Reply)
I won the lotto a few weeks ago, got 3 numbers on a +5 thing, £2.50, that's 50p pure profit that for that one line alone.
Over the weekend I decided to look at houses and flats and stuff 'cus I wanna buy this year or maybe next.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:00, Reply)
living with TGB getting to you already?

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:16, Reply)
I'm not going to be gay or nuffin', but it's totally awesome living with her.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:33, Reply)
You don't have set yourself up for Monty to give you a kicking mate
Yes it is

Alt: I don't bet

Now pass me a motherfuckin' handiwipe
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:33, Reply)
I know, one might as well through some chump to the sharks

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:34, Reply)
Well redeemed
That's more or less been my modus operandi since day one on /OT

Not deliberately, mind
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:37, Reply)
throw

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:40, Reply)
God I'm a spastic, typing quick replies brings out the worst in my dyslexia

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:41, Reply)
tyoing?
Must try harder

EDIT:
Ninja skills are 9/10
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:41, Reply)
9/10?
You are me AICMFP
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:43, Reply)
Soup is delicious
not peasant food.

Alt: I once won twenty pounds on a scratchcard
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:33, Reply)
Good times

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:34, Reply)
Soup IS food
BUT it's a bloody starter. Don't try and palm me off with it as an entire meal.

Meat FTW.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:38, Reply)
A good broth with pulses and meat in is a main course

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:40, Reply)
There comes a point
where it's a stew, though.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:48, Reply)
^this
I had a lovely veggie and pulse soup last night and it filled me up.

*waits for strikethrough*
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:01, Reply)
What does anyone here know about Voltarol?
I've gradually developed a blinding headache over the course of today and in desperation have accepted a colleague's offer of Voltarol in lieu of more recognised painkillers.

It's not working.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:38, Reply)
My clinical opinion is that Voltarol does not work for your headache

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:39, Reply)
Brilliant
I was hoping for experience of timeframes before the fucking thing kicks in, and ideally 100% agreement that accompanying the pain relief is a sense of euphoria akin to watching a Cylon attack wipe out an Oasis reunion gig
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:42, Reply)
Drink a shitload of water
This normally stops 90% of my headaches without taking any pills
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:46, Reply)
It's an non-steroidal anti-inflammatory
Should be taken in combination with paracetamol for best effect.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:44, Reply)
Thank you kindly, sir
*scrabbles around desperately for paracetamol*

Can't find any. Fucking macaws
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:45, Reply)
It'll still have an effect though!
How many did you take? Aspirin would be good to take too, but only if you're not drunk, anaemic or haemophilic!
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:46, Reply)
We're all haemophiliac on /OT, aren't we?
Just the one
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:49, Reply)
just Bert's daughter surely

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:50, Reply)
You can take two
Just don't be 8 years old or 8 stone. Get well soon!
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:52, Reply)
Cheers mate
Appreciate the advice
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:52, Reply)
or a cat

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:14, Reply)
Dr Jim has spoken

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:45, Reply)
Soup is food
and can be nom indeed.

Alt A:
I won £150 on roulette the first time I played (on boat to Amsterdam) and £850 on roulette the second time I played (in a casino on Madeira)
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:39, Reply)
I got an email saying unless I used my betfair account they would start taking an admin fee out
so I decided that since the football team I support are shit, I'd bet on us to lose - that way I'd either be happy the team didn't lose or happy I'd won some money.

Since then we haven't lost. So I'm... happy? I guess.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:45, Reply)
I can't bet on Fulham to lose.
Because then I actually want us to lose.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:53, Reply)
Weird MK news right here
www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/woman-jailed-over-death-fire-2241674.html
(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:46, Reply)
Fucking disableds, they should lock them all up before they cause more trouble

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:54, Reply)
yeah I reckon
alt: won $160 at the casino first time I went, went again and lost at least that much
they suck you in :(
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:47, Reply)
Really?!
*drives to Casino*

Oh, IN
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:49, Reply)
I reckon there's probably a glory hole or two
wouldn't know though, haven't been in years
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:51, Reply)
Tom Yum soup
is brilliant food.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:50, Reply)
I make a mean prawn and sweetcorn chowder
it is food because it has crispy bacon bits on it, and is served with a heap of mashed potato in the middle
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 14:53, Reply)
You know how they sale this stuff called "Crab and Sweetcorn soup" at the "Oriental Chef" in "Southgate" ? (it's a "chinese resturant").
Well, I plonk in some crab sticks to that to beef it up.

I'm not saying that's the greatest thing I've ever done, I wouldn't go that far, but it's in the top 10; somewhere between scuba diving in cuzmel and seeing the stars from a bedwin camp.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:01, Reply)
crab sticks
fake crab?
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:05, Reply)
It takes millions of the little blighters to make one stick.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:06, Reply)
Yeh', well nice, well cheap, ain't no poncyness up in this shizniss, I'm all up in that.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:06, Reply)
what's it made of?

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:07, Reply)
Condensed fishermen's semen.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:11, Reply)
:/

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:12, Reply)
Don't worry.
It's been pasturized first.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:12, Reply)
pasteurised

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:15, Reply)
That too.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:15, Reply)
"Fish Protines"
Taste just like crab or prawn, more meaty like king prawns, £1 gets me 16 of them... they're the chicken-nuggets of shelfish world.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:32, Reply)
They have to be leaglly called "crab flavoured sticks" as they contain no crab
only fish misery
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:07, Reply)
oh, fish misery, my favorite

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:12, Reply)
it's ok to eat fish cos they don't have any feelings

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:15, Reply)
nice
*click*
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:18, Reply)
I thought I recognised it.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:19, Reply)
Something in the way
ooooooooohhhhhh
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:19, Reply)
says who

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:19, Reply)
Kurt Cobain

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:20, Reply)
he was shit though so why believe him

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:31, Reply)
The fish
in a monotone.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:20, Reply)
Because they don't have feelings.
Seriously, who cares. Eat everything.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:20, Reply)
I'd eat human if society let me.
Fuck feelings.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:21, Reply)
same here

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:22, Reply)
Not the Scottish guy, though.
He's well spotty and really skinny. Not a good quality meat.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:22, Reply)
Seattle's worst shotgun cleaner

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:20, Reply)
subtle

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:22, Reply)
I fucking love a good soup.
I don't gamble with anything other than my love life. I can handle losing my self esteem but not my house.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:04, Reply)
Not being sexist or anything,
but for a bloke, gambling with love will usually end up losing a house.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:08, Reply)
Only if there is kids involved.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:09, Reply)
Quick tip: You can bet small amounts like £1 rather than your entire house

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:09, Reply)
Where's the fun in that?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:09, Reply)
And hence why you don't gamble!

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:10, Reply)
Bazinga!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:11, Reply)

i o
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:18, Reply)
Bazonga?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:19, Reply)
yep

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:19, Reply)
: /

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:22, Reply)
boobs innit

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:23, Reply)
isit

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:25, Reply)
itis

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:27, Reply)
itstits

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:27, Reply)
itistitsyeslotsoftitstittittittititis

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:29, Reply)
tinittus

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:33, Reply)
what?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 15:36, Reply)

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