I just made cookies. I ate most of them off the baking tray.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:17, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Earlier I put a load of flour, sugar and butter into a bowl.
Mixed it together and just ate it with a spoon. I am an utter wrong'un and according to the bathroom scales now weigh eleven stone. I might kill myself.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:19, Reply)

I weighed myself earlier and I'm up to twelve and a half stone.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:21, Reply)

Eleven stone?
If I was eleven stone I'd be verging on anorexic.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:21, Reply)

Aye, that's what I used to weigh when I couldn't afford food.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:22, Reply)

I actually got down to 11.1/2 stone once and people were worried about me.

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:24, Reply)

I constantly worry about you.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:24, Reply)

Why?

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:26, Reply)

Why not?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:27, Reply)

Is it like a hobby or something?

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:29, Reply)

It takes my mind off my own problems! :)

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:31, Reply)

Daft bugger!

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:33, Reply)

You sounded really northern then.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:41, Reply)

I am really northern.

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:46, Reply)

Do you call people 'duck' and use the word 'chuck' on a daily basis?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:48, Reply)

Nope! but my accent does slip more now and then.
I tend to go a bit posher at bashes.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:49, Reply)

I do, until I have a beverage

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:50, Reply)

I was talking to my sis the other day and kept saying fer instead of for.

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:53, Reply)

PETA will be onto her.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:55, Reply)

beverage?
'Bevvy, lar' you mean.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:54, Reply)

I tend to lapse from generic Yorkshire into broad Barnscasterfractian.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 22:03, Reply)

I'm the same, until I either drink, or speak quickly

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 22:06, Reply)

Same
I'm much more northern if I'm up north, or if I've had a drink. But my accent tends to go on a magical mystery tour of the British Isles if I'm really drunk.
(berk, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 22:08, Reply)

Where as I just sound like a farmer, regardless of where I am.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 22:09, Reply)

I want to lose around another stone because even at this weight my face looks like a pie.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:23, Reply)

*pinces cheeks*
I love chubby cheeks.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:25, Reply)

I despise mine. Absolutely despise mine.
People say I don't have them but they're humoring me.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:27, Reply)

Pic.

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:28, Reply)

*expects Barry to post a picture of a hamster*

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:29, Reply)

I think there's one on my profile, I can't be arsed checking as I'm on my phone.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:33, Reply)

*cue mad rush of people going to look*
Naaaaaah, you don't.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:35, Reply)

There is.
AND YOU DO NOT HAVE A FAT FACE.

I am not humouring you.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:35, Reply)

You can't see Barry.
He is sitting to the right, you can see his hand slowing sneaking around that other blokes neck, so he can nick his fags.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:37, Reply)

You look like a young, gay David Walliams with massive cheeks.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:36, Reply)

haha!

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:38, Reply)

I have been compared to David Walliams on a number of occasions.
I'll take that, it beats Carlos Tevez.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:41, Reply)

I'm fucking with you, your cheeks are perfectly proportional to the rest of your massive face.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:42, Reply)

Tevez, that's who I was thinking!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:50, Reply)

What length's your hair right now

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:38, Reply)

Quite short.
I'm getting it cut again tomorrow.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:45, Reply)

I think you're better looking with some hair
rather than a crop.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:46, Reply)

Nah I don't get it cropped. Clippers go nowhere near my bonce.
But long hair makes my face look rounder so that's out too.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:53, Reply)

you look a bit like Benedict Cumberbatch
but not as weird.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:40, Reply)

Ooo yes!
*checks who Benedict Cumberbatch is*

Nope. Not who I was thinking of.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:43, Reply)

Faceman from the A-Team?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:49, Reply)

No. He played a posh detective a while ago.
Tall dark and handsome.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:50, Reply)

He was Sherlock Holmes in Sherlock

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:50, Reply)

No not him.

( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:51, Reply)

*confirms with google* Yep, that's the one!
Fucking fantastic series.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:52, Reply)

I'm thinking of a different guy you numpty.
This guy


www.bing.com/images/search?q=inspector+lynley&view=detail&id=D6CB2F5C034D71D4B2205964B6A7DAEF241C135F&first=1&FORM=IDFRIR
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:54, Reply)

I'm going to tell everyone I ever meet I've been compared to this guy.
He is a dreamboat.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 22:10, Reply)

I'd still be overweight.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:27, Reply)

Weight is just a number
I'm 10 and a half stone and still clinically overweight, but I'd probably look ill if I got much thinner.
(berk, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:40, Reply)

Don't even talk to me about scales. The bane of my life. I am the moon.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:22, Reply)

I'd love to see your dark side.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:23, Reply)

Is it even possible to put on around five pounds over the course of a weekend? It's not is it?
I might buy some new ones that don't cost £2.99 from Argos, they're giving me a heart attack.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:24, Reply)

Why not steal some nice ones?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:25, Reply)

When I was losing weight I'd vary by a kilo. They are analogue though...
Now, I just don't look.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:29, Reply)

i go by which trousers fit
my friend found out he had lost lots of weight yesterday because, while running for a bus, his trousers fell down
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:29, Reply)

Is your mate one of those 'yoofs' who go around with their pants on show?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:30, Reply)

no
he's just not good at keeping his trousers up. We're still awaiting news on whether he was wearing pants.

Another friend does where trousers like that and someone else told him to 'pull them up, or they'll fall down' followed by rugby tackling him and pulling them down for him. The bad news was his pants came down, too and the mother and baby standing there in front got an eyeful :(
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:33, Reply)

hahahaha
How are you this evening Crunchy? Any Cupid news?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:36, Reply)

no
but apparently the ex-b3tan has been on b3ta last night for a couple of hours. I assume /board, but I have no idea who it is. I don't know many /board regulars any more.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:39, Reply)

Alfonso Bongo?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:40, Reply)

no
he said he'd not been on for ages until last night
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:42, Reply)

Is it going anywhere?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:49, Reply)

I've no idea
I've only been mailing for a day! Slow down, man
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:50, Reply)

I don't know how these things work!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:56, Reply)

hell, nor do I

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:57, Reply)

Well we demand regular updates!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 22:00, Reply)

I didn't weigh myself for ages.
I went by notches on my belt.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:32, Reply)

I'm on notch 3 currently :D
I was on notch 1 when I started to lose weight properly, so I'm pretty happy!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:36, Reply)

COOKIE MONSTER!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:29, Reply)

ANIMAL

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:30, Reply)

C IS FOR COOKIE, THAT'S GOOD ENOUGH FOR MEEEEEE

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:30, Reply)

DOOF!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:35, Reply)

haha

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 15 Mar 2011, 21:38, Reply)