Morning, morning
Second time lucky, I avoided for just seconds to get trapped on the central line yesterday when a signal failed and all the trains were stopped just a moment after I decided I was going to walk to the next stop and do a bit of exercise. So close...

Unlucky though, as Barcelona didn't win yesterday. Oh, well, we can still get the Champions and the League, it shouldn't be too bad...

We're getting our flat today, finally. We have a nice weekend in front of us with Tate (no so nice), bbqs, Doctor Who(m)... 4 nice long days to enjoy this summer time.

A question for you, then... well, probably nobody will start replying before 8:30, anyway... but let's see... I don't know, how are you feeling today? Glad about the holidays? Going somewhere special? Any nice plans?

Monty, why are you upset today?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:19, 101 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

When I finish at 5pm today
I am not going back til 9th May. And in a weeks time I fly out to Croatia for 10 days. Wooooofuckinghooooo.
I'm currently making hot cross buns for people at work. I'm too nice.
(berk, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:21, Reply)

That's great
the whole thing. The holidays, and the trip to Croatia (is tennis boy going with you?)

But best of all, you're doing hot cross buns? I want one! I don't know how to make them either.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:26, Reply)

No, I'm going on my own
I couldn't persuade anyone to come with me (nobody had the time, money or wanted to leave their partner behind....also I'm a terrible cunt)

Hot cross buns are a piece of piss to make. Its just bread with fruit and spices, really.
(berk, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:27, Reply)

I think I've never been on a holiday on my own
But I'd probably enjoy time on my own on a nice place. Sure you'll have fun.

Bread and fruit, eh? I might give it a try this weekend.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:30, Reply)

What do you make the cross from?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:36, Reply)

Flour and water paste.

(berk, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:37, Reply)

Thanks.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:50, Reply)

I'm feeling good.
I'm not on holiday.
No.
Yes.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:25, Reply)

You don't have bank holidays?
Where do you work?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:26, Reply)

I'm freelance, and deadlines are deadlines.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:41, Reply)

Seeing my partner tonight.
Tomorrow we may be ex partners. So, I'm feeling a bit low today. Not planned anything for the rest of the weekend yet, possibly dangling under a sturdy tree with 30 pieces of silver in my pocket.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:25, Reply)

Are you going to break up
or the other way round? Are you leaving your partner for money? I know times are tight, but 30 pieces of silver for a broken heart don't seem like a good deal.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:27, Reply)

It's a reference to Judas, I believe.

(berk, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:28, Reply)

I know, I got it
But why Judas? Is he selling her for money? Really?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:31, Reply)

Its Easter.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:32, Reply)

They don't have Easter in Spain.
They just push a donkey off a bell tower, or something.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:48, Reply)

Nah
They give that up for Lent
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:51, Reply)

You know nothing
Nothing.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:03, Reply)

He is from Barcelona.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:08, Reply)

I am from Barcelona

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Yup,
I think he has had a bad press.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:31, Reply)

There are cogent arguments that he was a key disciple.
After all, if you retarded enough to believe the farcical 'ACTUALLY he meant to be arrested, betrayed and killed ACTUALLY, that was the plan' hogwash, then the person entrusted with the 'other' key role in the enterprise was the betrayer and thus likely to be a top chap.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:58, Reply)

You are suffering from what we doctors call "Sausage fingers" today Monty.
*ducks*
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:05, Reply)

Mmmmm duck sausages.
Am I, though? How?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:11, Reply)

if you retarded
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:13, Reply)

I don't think either of us want to break up, but I think our relationship has run it's course.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:30, Reply)

There are worse ways of breaking up
If you don't love each other anymore, it's the right thing to do. Or you can give yourselves some time off, spend a month or so without doing much together, and then see how you feel and if you want to come back or not.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:31, Reply)

I hope the having a little time off, will be the way we go.
I suspect that everyting will be my fault, and I may just leave.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:34, Reply)

It worked for my sister
never worked for me, though. But you might find out that you miss each other too much. Or not at all, and then you won't want to be back together anyway. The problem is when one misses and the other doesnt. In that case... spend your silver coins wisely and get steadily drunk until the pain ceases.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:39, Reply)

I know we both miss each other anyway, during our normal relationship.
Biggest problem is when we are with other people, the mix just spoils.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:44, Reply)

Look on the bright side
You get to eat her Easter Egg
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:49, Reply)

Hahaha
I wouldn't dare.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:53, Reply)

Sorry to hear that mate
Don't kill yourself until I've bought you that pint. Surely that's enough incentive to keep struggling on?

If not, um... the final Harry Potter film should be good...
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:30, Reply)

When is it out?
June? July? I can't wait.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:32, Reply)

Not sure actually
Haven't even seen the first part yet. I am a massive failure
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:40, Reply)

You are the weakest link

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:48, Reply)

Awfully good of you to bring that up, old boy
*smugs*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:53, Reply)

I'm really nowhere near cracking up really.
I thought I would take a leaf from your book and do a little attention whoring.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:36, Reply)

Repitition of "really"
Otherwise very good. Obi Wan has taught you well.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:38, Reply)

You know things are bad when....
You get patronised by Darth.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:46, Reply)

Nah, I'd do that anyway
You only know things are bad when you feel it's justified
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:47, Reply)

I'm feeling really good.
I'm on holiday now - I'm back at home. Mum and I are going to the movies tonight to watch Paul, which'll be good. :)
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:38, Reply)

Paul?
No idea... I haven't been to the cinema in ages.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:40, Reply)

Paul is the new Simon Pegg/Nick Frost movie.
I haven't been in ages either, which's why we're going.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:42, Reply)

It's pretty good
I was slightly disappointed, but only because I had very high expectations. It's funny, just not Shaun of the Dead-level funny
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:42, Reply)

I watched Hot Fuzz last night at uni.
gooood times.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:46, Reply)

"I'm not made of hands"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:47, Reply)

No it won't.
Have you seen who's in it?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:47, Reply)

Yes and I have their two other films, I quite enjoy them. :)

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:00, Reply)

Last day at work until May 3rd..
...And I'm 'working from home' - I:E tossing about on the interweb between updating reports and calling customers.
All in all it's gonna be a good day!
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:42, Reply)

Your masturbatory plans might be best kept to yourself, I think.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:46, Reply)

Just heard a good stat on radio 5
Apparently 25% of 18-24 men think they watch too much porn on the internet
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:47, Reply)

Wankers.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:50, Reply)

Indeed
Some were watching 10 hours a week. Wankers cramp or what?

Labs?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:51, Reply)

Oh he's a 20+hrs a week man.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:04, Reply)

37.5 contracted wank hours

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:16, Reply)

10 hours?
Clearly it's not *good* porn, or they'd lose interest after about 5 minutes.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:26, Reply)

I was feeling good until the DVLA returned my
driving license which they want me to pay £20 to update the photo on. It has been returned as I didn't also send my paper one (with no photo on). I now cannot find the fucking paper one so I've basically got today to sort it all out as it expires next Wednesday when I'm on holiday, leaving me technically without a license. This means I will be able to drive there, but not back. CUNT
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:43, Reply)

Can't you just gaz them a photo of your cock?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:49, Reply)

I will try this at once
*gazzes*
*sirens*
*sound of handcuffs*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:50, Reply)

The zoom on his camera's broken.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:50, Reply)

I dont need no stinking zoom

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:52, Reply)

But you do need a macro setting.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:56, Reply)

My penis is like the Great Wall of China
It can be seen from (my)space
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:59, Reply)

I'll click that.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:03, Reply)

I'm upset because you said 'we' about Barcelona.
Unless you are actually a professional footballer - in which case I sincerely apologise - I have some bad news for you: you're not in the team.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:46, Reply)

You can't help yourself with this can you?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:46, Reply)

Yes and no.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:47, Reply)

You can help yourself but feel no urge to do so?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:48, Reply)

Precisely. I could have said nothing and nearly did, but then thought 'eff that shit yo'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:50, Reply)

I got something right!
That's my one for this week used up
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:54, Reply)

Barcelona is more than a club
and we are all part of the team, as the passion in our hearts gives them the strenght to play!

Well, no, really, I'm with you. Sorry about the "we", I always make fun of people who does it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:11, Reply)

I'm upset because, despite Man U dangling the carrot of a failure to beat Newcastle,
WE were unable to beat Spurs, and indeed were lucky to hold them to a draw in the second half.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:51, Reply)

Good game though, for the neutral
and MY fantasy football team
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:52, Reply)

Cracking goal from Huddlestone though

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:03, Reply)

I've not been keeping track of the El Clasico marathon - was it the Copa Del Rey last night?
Sorry to hear there'll be no treble this year. I think your players need a new challenge. How would Villa, Messi and Xavi feel about living in Nottingham?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:51, Reply)

About that same as everyone else, I'd imagine

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:52, Reply)

Excellent
They won't mind the 95% wage reduction then
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:55, Reply)

Saw an article on the BBC site
saying Spanish footballers earned an average of £6.8million at Real/Barca
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 8:56, Reply)

Hardly surprising, most of the Spanish players at Barca are also the Spanish national team
Wonder how much Messi earns a week
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:07, Reply)

Apparently he has scored 50 goals this season
and Ronaldo 42!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:08, Reply)

Don't want Ronaldo.
Because he's a cunt.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Yes, Copa del Rey
I don't know if they'd like the weather there. You can contact and ask, I don't know, send them a twitter or something.

I wouldn't want to live in Nottingham myself.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:16, Reply)

I'd say "join the club"
but we have run out of membership cards
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:20, Reply)

There are worse places to leave, really
But not many, I'd think.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:20, Reply)

Quick Darth question
Why move from the bustling metropolis that is Nottingham to the backward 6 fingered village of Norwich?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:22, Reply)

Came to Uni here
Wasn't my first choice, but I discovered alcohol during Sixth Form. Had I done better I'd have ended up in Birmingham and never met Ms Foxtrot
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:26, Reply)

My mate Chris ended up at UEA too
and met his missus there
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:27, Reply)

I was trying to think if I knew any Mackems called Chris for a minute there
Cos obviously it's really likely we'd have met...
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:29, Reply)

May I just say 'Dr Who(m)' really made me smile.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:06, Reply)

No, you may not.
Now fuck off.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Bye!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:11, Reply)

See Ya! Wouldn't wanna be ya*!

*the above statement does not apply to your relationship with Lusty
(Bazongaloid, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:12, Reply)

Eating a packet of Reggae Reggae peanuts for breakfast
wasn't a very good idea.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:17, Reply)

But were the nuts good to eat?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:19, Reply)

Yes, they were wonderful
But i'm going to have to run extra fast tonight to make up for it. Let alone the large pork pie I also purchased for my lunch.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:21, Reply)

If you're attacked by a mugger with a peanut allergy
you'll be set, though.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:24, Reply)

I had duck with armagnac pate on crackers. Bit too rich for 9am.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:29, Reply)

I'm feeling quite chipper today.
Off to see the awesome twosome tomorrow for bands, booze and beaches.

Three and a half weeks till Tenerife and then the bash. I also get to see my mate from New Zealand. How fabulous is that!

Edit - In fact there is so much going on next month it's scaring me. I may burst into tears.
( girlinthehole, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:23, Reply)

that is ace.
I hope you have a good time with them. Give them both a hug for me.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:27, Reply)

Will do : )

( girlinthehole, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 9:28, Reply)