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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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That thread is spluttering like Darth after the sixth stranger of the night "completes"
Anyone into photography? What equipment do you use? Who do you admire? What styles work well for you? hints and tips?

Alt: Kate Humble or Michaela Strachen?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:38, 223 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
way to offer some really wide scope for discussion apey...

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:41, Reply)
That's alright
we'll just bait you until you get angry again.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:41, Reply)
*pokes bobby with stick*

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:43, Reply)
DOES NOT PLAY WELL WITH OTHERS
you cunt
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:44, Reply)
When i do that i get lambasted for not asking a specific quetsion :s

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:42, Reply)
He was obviously punning genius
Bobby's a man of greater depth (of field) than you imagine
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:44, Reply)
Bugger...

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:44, Reply)
it'll be fine
just see what develops
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:46, Reply)
Look, just f.stop this right now

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:48, Reply)
could you make a pun that was
any obscura?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:48, Reply)
Yes
I'm sure I can find one - there's an App(erture) for that
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:49, Reply)
and you can shutter up too

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:51, Reply)
Do you have your own photography business?
If so, pick me up some cheap booze at Macro
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:56, Reply)
you are shit at this

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:57, Reply)
I really am
Punning is at the opposite end of my ability scale from knowledge of useless trivia
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:00, Reply)
would this pun down
be easier for you if we enlarged the criteria?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:58, Reply)
I'm Neutral (Density) towards the idea
Fuck me I am awful at this
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:04, Reply)
you need a better pun filter

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:09, Reply)
You'll be relieved to hear I've run out of ideas
I can't even manage a bad pun based on my being punished by being fired out of a Canon

Oh, yes I can! Cos if anyone can...

(yes this is deliberately meant to wind you up as a Nikon user)
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:13, Reply)
YOu're just nikon the good ideas from the internet

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:22, Reply)
I really am done now

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:25, Reply)
Come on.
Focus.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:49, Reply)
I SO think you're being a little difficult

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:50, Reply)
Ah, so there is a silver of hope for you

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:51, Reply)
it's ok Apey sooner or later
the real answers will start to sepia through
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:48, Reply)
no
alt: Susannah Reid
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:41, Reply)
Fuck off

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:49, Reply)
I would fuck you to fuck her!
win.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:52, Reply)
I would fuck you whilst you were fucking her
and just close my eyes
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:52, Reply)
Hey wait a fucking second here, there's a queue for Susannah
1.Me
2.Sportscow
3.The rest of you fucking mingers
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:15, Reply)
you are welcome to the full range of average looking tv presenters
leaving the actually hot women for the rest of us with some taste.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:31, Reply)
Neither! I'm not keen on blondes.
Oh and my camera has an idiot mode on it.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:44, Reply)
I'm not sure the carpets and curtains match on Strachean

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:45, Reply)
She's still a skinny bitch and I really have never got what men see in her. She's fugly.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:47, Reply)
me neither, I just saw humble on Spring Watch last night and need an alt

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:49, Reply)
And I agree on the crisp thing but don't tell Al.
Love cheese and love onions but cheese and onion crisps are the nasty.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:50, Reply)
Good decision
i also liek them in their natural state, but not in their processed state.
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:53, Reply)
I agree, too

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:53, Reply)
the main question I think everyone knows the answer to for me
and I have: a Nikon D300, D70, F60, FM20, an Olympus MJU II, Olympus tough 6000, some practica I don't know the name of, Halina 35mm, a Lubitel and a beer can with a hole I passed my masters with.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:45, Reply)
I'm sort of into it. Enough that I take care with my photos, but not enough to invest serious money into it.
I have a superzoom that approximates a lot of an SLR's settings and I'm mostly into macro stuff with occasional urban landscape.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:45, Reply)
macro poos...gross

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:46, Reply)
Humble all the way
Strachan is mental
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:50, Reply)
I have a Canon Ixus something or other
it takes pictures.

I like pictures of breasts.

alt: Kate Humble, Strachan is getting on a bit
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:50, Reply)
it doesn't take pictures, you do
don't be a slave to the machine!
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:52, Reply)
ok, it facilitates the taking of pictures, by me

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:54, Reply)
better
now write me your 500 evaluation and hand it in to faculty office by 3pm tomorrow
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:59, Reply)
pah
I wouldn't have done that even when I was still in education
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:59, Reply)
seriously?
500 words is nothing
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:01, Reply)
I'm a busy man

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:02, Reply)
Money spinner, right.
A picture of your woman's boobs every year, thus charting their slow, inexorable descent. Get it put up in the Tate entitled "Entropy" or "Inevitable Disappointment", or something equally as mysterious and sell it for millions of pounds, Emin style.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:59, Reply)
Entropy is a good name for it

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:20, Reply)
Not really, can't afford a decent camera.
Alt: Kate Humble. There's something really saucy about her smile, despite all the jolly hockeysticks.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:51, Reply)
Nah! she's strictly a quick finger and then the missionary position.
Maybe a cheeky cowgirl on your birthday.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:53, Reply)
delivered as if by someone who is actually in the know

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:54, Reply)
Woman's intuition innit.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:55, Reply)
God, how boring.

(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:58, Reply)
The only element of excitment you'll get is the fear that Bill Oddie will be hiding in the corner
of your bedroom, watching you and Humble go at it hammer and tongs through his binoculars.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:00, Reply)
"birdwatching"

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:01, Reply)
"got a couple of good shags
but then it took a tern for the worst"
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:02, Reply)
Put the heating on otherwise she'll have blue tits.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:03, Reply)
Where are you planning on putting the hockey sticks?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:54, Reply)
Round your fucking face you shit-thread wanker.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:57, Reply)
Afternoon Boyce

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:02, Reply)
It is indeed.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:02, Reply)
No wonder Monty hates you.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:54, Reply)
Innit.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:55, Reply)
er hem
b3ta.turb0t.net/questions/offtopic/post1223724
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:56, Reply)
I was lying. I hate your fucking guts.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:57, Reply)
think happy thoughts methuselah

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:00, Reply)
I am.
They feature the mutilated corpse of NakedApe, me, and some jolly dancing.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:02, Reply)
goose stepping whilst shitting on his corpse?

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:06, Reply)
I was thinking more 'Scottish sword dance' but using NA's severed limbs in the place of swords.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:09, Reply)
Will you be sporting a kilt so he get's to see your wrinkly genitals before he dies?

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:11, Reply)
Monty might just fancy doing a spot of tea-bagging.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:14, Reply)
*something about 'the Ring'*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:15, Reply)
I'll put you back on "the list" then *sigh*

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:02, Reply)
heeeeeeeey my friend has just started a photography business with the camera her parter bought for her!
I don't know anything about cameras but look at this!
she's going to make loads of cash!
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:58, Reply)
Tell her she needs to not take pictures of ugly people
and that she needs to not use really shit fonts badly laid out on top of them
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:59, Reply)

youarenotaphotographer.com/
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:00, Reply)
hahahaha
exactly
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:01, Reply)
there are so many people who think they are photographers at the mo, it's quite irritating
have you seen all the dull photos people put on the /board where they've just HDR'ed the bastard out of it and everyone is like "oh, that is so lovely" WHY THE FUCK DID I BOTHER TRAINING IN THIS SHIT?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:04, Reply)
I do like nice HDR photos
but I get your point. I'm so far from being a photographer it hurts.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:04, Reply)
HDR is not necessarily a bad thing
but it's like people fear shadows in pictures at the moment. There's also rehashing of old photography arguments, hence my last coll3ctive post. I feel the need to be the grumpy old woman of photography putting down all the upstarts.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:08, Reply)
you've got the knowledge
it is your right to be all grumpy about it and put down upstarts. I'd do the same about surfing and guitar playing
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:10, Reply)
Yes, you would if you were any good at either of those things.

(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:12, Reply)
you can't see it
but that made me do a wry smile, because those are two of the things I am actually good at
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:14, Reply)
You can't see it, but that actually made me spit water all over my desk.
Am I still getting an invite? I'm keeping the day free especially and I'm going to make you an awesome card that says "With cards this awesome, who needs expensive wedding presents" because I'm not going to get you an expensive wedding present. Probably just some bacon or something.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:17, Reply)
oh man, bacon would be sweet
I haven't mentioned it to the mrs, but I strongly suspect that if I said I'd like to invite a few people from here then she wouldn't mind.

it'd have to be to the evening bit only though, because we are tightfisted.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:18, Reply)
I'm getting you less bacon now.
But if you invite CHCB and catface then we can all chip in and get you some awesome bacon. I had some the other day that was cured with treacle. It was great, when you cooked it, it looked like you had burnt it really easily, but it was just caramalised.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:20, Reply)
that sounds pretty good

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:24, Reply)
I wish someone would tell her this.
I want to bash my face into a wall every time I see her talk about it.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:07, Reply)
Gaz me her number. I'll do it right now.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:08, Reply)
it's taking everything I have not to send you her number

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:16, Reply)
Holy shit
is that second photo Maladicta?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:03, Reply)
She's certainly malformed.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:05, Reply)
the "love is not something blah blah blah" one?

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:05, Reply)
Or 'the SECOND ONE', to use another method of identification.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:07, Reply)
what I was getting at
was that it clearly isn't her in that photo, so I was making sure he wasn't being retarded and calling another picture the second one.

you stupid old cunt
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:09, Reply)
It does look a bit like her
Are you thinking of a different midget ex b3tan?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:12, Reply)
wasn't Maladicta a bit on the massive side?

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:13, Reply)
Sideways
not up and down.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:15, Reply)
You should have more faith in your ability to count to two.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:15, Reply)
it was Al's ability that I was doubting

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:15, Reply)
And that she should send me a tit-gaz as a matter of urgency.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:00, Reply)
How fucking backward is the place you live?
We have COLOUR photographs over our way.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:01, Reply)
She's being "artistic". She also has some one of a baby in black and white and the pacifier is pink! It's like magic!
It's inspired me to start my own video recording business.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:03, Reply)
colour highlighting has been a function of a lot of digital cameras for a long time
if she is using that then she shouldn't be setting herself up as a photographer
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:04, Reply)
it's better done in Photoshop
but it's still quite frequently shit
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:05, Reply)
Really?
I thought it was something she learned to do at the photo processing center at WalMart!
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:05, Reply)
either way
it's fucking easy, and it screams amateur
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:08, Reply)
Like the Stone Roses performing at the BBC

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:09, Reply)
One of the most pathetic bits of footage of any band ever shot, ever.
In the history of the world.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:14, Reply)
also
they are shit.

crap music for peasants
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:14, Reply)
^ online facts, freely available to all
'Best British album of all time' my fucking shitter.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:20, Reply)
It screams, "I have as much taste as a Northener who has inexplicably come into some money"

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:09, Reply)
really, I know this, but no one here realises it
there's a shit ton of people on her facebook page saying things like "oh that's so nice, how much for you to do my kids?!??!!"
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:11, Reply)
I'll do them for free

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:11, Reply)
ah I see
well, the key to a successful business is being adept at conning loads of money from idiots, so it sounds like she is off to a good start
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:12, Reply)
I'd like to cunt punt her and everyone stupid enough to buy her photos
I am almost willing to bet money that she gets them printed at the pharmacy.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:14, Reply)
you are awesome

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:16, Reply)
I don't know why it makes me so angry but it does.

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:19, Reply)
please do
I sucked at running a photograph business, though, because I spent ages doing stuff properly
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:19, Reply)
It's inspired me to start my own imbecile killing business

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:04, Reply)
:(

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:04, Reply)
I got a new digital video recorder for Christmas!

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:06, Reply)
Betamax-tastic!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:08, Reply)
Oh dear, I do hope you haven't invested?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:07, Reply)
nah, my parents bought it for me
but I'm going to start recording things like bunnies eating and deer walking in my back yard, just to show I can do it!
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:09, Reply)
I meant in your friend's business
get a tripod, seriously
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:10, Reply)
No. But the sad thing is that I would probably make a profit, people around here are so dim, not only does she believe they're good, backwater redneck retards believe it too.
It's insulting to the people around here that actually have talent and skill.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:12, Reply)
I'm pissed off that my wedding photographer sold herself partly on ther ability to produce amazing albums
when in the end me and the wife ended up doing it all ourselves. Literally using software on her computer that I had never seen before because I was more capable than she was.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:14, Reply)
That is really really poor, my mates were all awful. She misse the important bits, cut of heads etc
unbelieveable really.

We have ours printed into a book rather than pictures stuck down
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:17, Reply)
The album in the end was fucking excellent
and well worth our hard work. But at the time I was fucking furious.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:22, Reply)
Had you already paid?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:25, Reply)
I can fucking imagine, that's bullshit.

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:26, Reply)
we'll be going with the printed book idea I think

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:25, Reply)
Our album is like a Medieval tome
It is fucking massive
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:27, Reply)
ours will most likely be elegant and stylish
like everything with which I am involved
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:30, Reply)
With a croissant covering

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:31, Reply)
no

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:33, Reply)
That would just be fucking stupid.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:39, Reply)
I know
hardly a lasting memento.

what was he thinking eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:41, Reply)
It would go mouldy within days.
What an idiot.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:43, Reply)
I suppose you could be careful to dry it out and preserve it that way
but why would you want to?

it'd just flake all over the place.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:46, Reply)
what a cunt
a mate of ours is doing our photos, and won't accept any money. Not because he's shit, but because he's nice.

He's not a photographer any more though.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:17, Reply)
Ugh that sucks!
I wonder if people actually still develop film old school style.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:17, Reply)
helllo!
that would be me
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:20, Reply)
I'm impressed.
I don't know anything about photography at all, but I think a lot of it is too digital.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:21, Reply)
it's all fun
I teach darkroom, still, and I used to print black and white for a living. I've done colour handprinting, too, but it's expensive to do yourself and hardly anywhere has the facilities .
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:25, Reply)
Shit!
That is terrible. Our wedding album was excellent
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:19, Reply)
Way to rub it in.

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:20, Reply)
I thought so

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:22, Reply)
people often see wedding photographers charging lots and think
"well that's easy" and do a shit job when they realise it's harder than they think. Makes me proper cross. Not that I'd ever do weddings, it's a bastard of a job
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:21, Reply)
our son in law is a photographer
and does a lot of weddings. He did our wedding photos too, which is why he isn't in any of them.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:23, Reply)
that's the advantage of being a photographer
you don't have to be in the pictures.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:28, Reply)
it's like watching the winner of the X-factor makes loads of money
while talented singers and bands are stuck playing shit hole pubs with Blue Haze
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:15, Reply)
haha blue haze, le sigh

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:16, Reply)
They also play festivals, supporting bands such as Simple Minds, consisting of two past members of Simple Minds, and not really Simple Minds at all

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:19, Reply)
Not sure if Noel and I can make it, sorry.
Labs is a maybe.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:13, Reply)
No I'm not. I use my phone (Nokia N8) which is apparently the best camera on a phone on the market.
I admire Hitler. '70s roadie style' works well for me. Here's a hint and a tip: you should fuck off, but also die.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 15:59, Reply)
HAHA you have a shit phone

(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:04, Reply)
Oh ZING.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:06, Reply)
I really thought we were making progress
I guess it's back to relationship counselling again
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:05, Reply)
Yup. You get onto the other members of the council and see if you can set up a meeting.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:06, Reply)
I don't see what local government offcials have to do with this

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:08, Reply)
You, earlier:

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:13, Reply)
Has Ape got polio?
He seems to have legs borrowed from Ian Dury
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:15, Reply)
He seems to have borrowed a 'noticeable absence of any talent whatsoever' from Dury as well.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:16, Reply)
I thought that was Al earlier?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:17, Reply)
I can't see pictures I'm afraid

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:18, Reply)
There's nothing to be scared of

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:18, Reply)
I can't see dead people

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:21, Reply)
It's a picture of a retard eating his own shit.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:22, Reply)
Or a mirror for Apey

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:23, Reply)
I can only use my little compact Panasonic
because I shake like Michael J Fox on a rollercoaster, and it's the only camera with a decent enough image stabilisation.

mr b3th is the photographer in our house. I couldn't tell you what he has, but there's a lot of them, and lenses to boot, and takes absolutely awesome portraits. Except of me, because I am quite literally the most unphotogenic person in the world.

Alt: neither, thanks. I'll take Matt Baker if you're offering though.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:16, Reply)
Nonsense
Who took your profile photos on Facebook? They are excellent
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:17, Reply)
That's very sweet of you to say.
but that's approximately three good pictures out of hundreds. The other half likes to take 'candid' shots, which basically translates as me looking gormless with slack-jawed idiocy.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:19, Reply)
I do not photograph well

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:20, Reply)
Are you Albanian?
'I do not photograph well. Only horse.'
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:22, Reply)
Haha!
Horse take shit pictures with magic box
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:22, Reply)
I only have skill to create transportation device using wood
I no have ability to mix copies of "Tom Sawyer" by Rush to create "Break Beat"
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:24, Reply)
do you like Rush?
assuming the answer is yes, have you heard their newest release?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:25, Reply)
BU2B?
If so, yes, I really like it, if not, No.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:28, Reply)
no idea what it is called
they've been playing it on Planet Rock. If it is the same one, I really like it too
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:29, Reply)
It's short for "Brought up to believe"

(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:30, Reply)
I think that is it
it's good
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:31, Reply)
That makes two of you

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:25, Reply)
'Is future of rockandroll, yes?'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:26, Reply)
is most important musical type since jazz, yes?

(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:28, Reply)
Yesh
Schteve rocksh and you will be rolling, yesh
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:28, Reply)
"I'm just not photogenic"
WAKE UP THAT'S HOW YOU LOOK.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:25, Reply)
I NO RITE
:o(
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:26, Reply)
yeah because photographs
always show things as the look
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:27, Reply)
oooooooh get all artistic on his ass, Queen Crunchy

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:27, Reply)
This exact defence has got Chompy off a number of charges

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:28, Reply)
You are Roxette AICMFuck off you fucking wankers

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:28, Reply)
*narrows eyes and gives The Look*

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:30, Reply)
YOU'VE got the AIDS

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:37, Reply)
well some people have the reflex of shutting their eyes, or pulling a face when trying to smile for a camera

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:27, Reply)
Poor Joey Deacon :(

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:30, Reply)
Haha
He actually looked completely normal, you know.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:36, Reply)
That happens to me too.
There's only one person who has ever managed to get a decent photo of me, and that was with my own camera.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:18, Reply)
I don't want to turn this whole thing into a discussion of my epic body dysmorphia,
but even on the rare occasions I will look in the mirror and be happy with what I see, any photgraph taken at exactly the same time will be hideous.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:20, Reply)
How did you manage to have such a sexy sibling?

(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:29, Reply)
I look like my Dad in a frock
He looks like our rather better-looking, photeginic mother's side of the family.

But thanks for helping with the pain Al.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:31, Reply)
That's alright
Maybe you could photoshop your brothers face onto any photos you get. That way you'll always look HAWT!
(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:35, Reply)
You could photoshop my tits onto his body
and you'd be a happy man.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:36, Reply)
I know the feeling.
I try to keep my chins up, but you know...
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:31, Reply)
Post it on here, now, so we can decide for ourselves.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:21, Reply)
If you really are a cube....

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:21, Reply)
Haha, nice try.
Besides, it got lost in a hard drive crash about six months ago. Perhaps I should get a facebook so I can back all this shit up.

But here's a bad one, all the same.

bit.ly/kxRoDk
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:29, Reply)
Or perhaps you should get a dry cleaner for your impressive scarf collection.

(Bazongaloid, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:29, Reply)
felching scarf collection

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:30, Reply)
I don't own any scarves.
Wouldn't mind a big long one for the winter though. A Dr Who one would do quite nicely.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:31, Reply)
was it a magic camera like the ones at Glamour Shots??

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:25, Reply)
No, but I'm considering photoshopping my photos in future.

(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:38, Reply)
I got the theme tune from Supergran in my head and I don't know why.
As you were.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:38, Reply)
Not a day goes by that I don't instruct Superman, Ice-man, Spider-man, Batman and also Robin to stand back.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:40, Reply)
I don't even know the theme to that, so I'm grand.
This however, took forever to get out of my head.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLsJyfN0ICU&feature=fvst

Especially when they were playing it on loop at the new shopping centre just across the road.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:42, Reply)
oh man, this is so cool

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:45, Reply)
It isn't.
It really, really isn't.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:47, Reply)
oh but it is
it is now on the fb wall of my pirate loving buddy
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:50, Reply)
They'll hate you for it when they can't get it out of their head.

(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 2 Jun 2011, 16:51, Reply)

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