My ex is now telling me I should sell my records to cover her rent increase.
This isn't a reasonable request, is it?

I need to know as I'm about to tell her to get fucked.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:34, 9 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Bitches be kerrazy

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:35, Reply)

This one is. Despite my constantly claiming otherwise, I've never actually hated anyone in my life other than her.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:37, Reply)

What, not even *gasp* David Bowie?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:37, Reply)

Nope - he's filed under 'extreme dislike'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:42, Reply)

*is stunned*

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:45, Reply)

No you're not - I've met him.
You're Davros' Granddad you senile auld bastard.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:46, Reply)

Pffft.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:47, Reply)

And now you've shat yourself.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:50, Reply)

I suspect that would actually be you
What with the fifteen angry black men bumming you every Friday. I imagine your arsehole must be about as retentive as a sieve by now.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:53, Reply)

It's like a pink sock with no elastic in it.
My poos look like cow pats.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:56, Reply)

Monters
It makes me sad to hear this.

I would definitely buy some of your records though. ;-)
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:46, Reply)

a sphincter says what?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:01, Reply)

hate requires way too much upkeep

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:46, Reply)

I think you can tell her to get to fuck
with a clear conscience
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:35, Reply)

No.
Why the fuck should you cover her rent increase?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:36, Reply)

Woo! DG.
Train booked and looking forward to the weekend after next. *glees*
( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:37, Reply)

Woo hoo!

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:38, Reply)

WOO MOTHERFUCKING HOO!!

( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:38, Reply)

WOO, but also a large helping of HOO.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:43, Reply)

It would depend on how much she gets off you now.
I'm assuming it's enough. So tell her to get to fuck.
( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:36, Reply)

£260 a month. It's what has tipped me into insolvency, actually.
Of course I don't begrudge her a penny of it but there is literally no more I can give her. I need my loo fixing and a new oven (I've not had a working one for a long time now) and cannot afford either.

This is not a 'woe is me' post but an 'I am broke' one. And before any high-horsers stampede in here I don't pay for my MDs.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:41, Reply)

Sexual favours for your dealer is it?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:46, Reply)

Yes.
I get bummed by fifteen huge angry black men every Friday but I think it's worth it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:48, Reply)

I heard you look like an earthquake victim in a yop factory afterwards.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:41, Reply)

How much are your records worth?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:40, Reply)

That sounds mental.
Tell her to sell her drugs to pay for it. Or her body.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:38, Reply)

She'd get good money for that. It's the only non-repellent thing about her.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:42, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:43, Reply)

Nope
and be glad you never married the bitch. She, or rather your daughter, but lines can get blurred, is entitled to about 15% of your salary and not much else.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:38, Reply)

Oh I am indeed glad.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:46, Reply)

You should be.
Hold on to the little crumbs of comfort when life if being shit to you Monty old boy.

That fact and your lovely daughter should be two. Your flowing locks and Dorian-grey-like ability to not look as crap as you deserve too should also be on the list.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:56, Reply)

She's three, actually.
LOL

Jesting aside, thank you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:57, Reply)

Hey, I may not agree with you stance on The Best Band in the World
The Sultans of Ping FC if you have to ask, but I'm impressed with your fathering ability. You do better than I do and under harder circumstances.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:01, Reply)

Sultans of Ping ? hahaha!
I haven't heard them for ages. I'll have to get them on youtube tonight.
( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:16, Reply)

They are so piss-poor that there's an appeal on Somalian TV to raise money for them.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:22, Reply)

And the irony is
I'd forgotten all about them until you brought them up.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:23, Reply)

I never forget.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:26, Reply)

and that is your tragedy

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:28, Reply)

If you have a cassette player
I can lend you the album.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:22, Reply)

Unfortunately not.

( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:23, Reply)

*Check's phone*
Seems I have them on MP3 too *smugs*
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:24, Reply)

I think you should give 'Check' his phone back.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:26, Reply)

I nearly got married once.
I'm very, very glad I didn't.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:59, Reply)

I did
the party was good, but it went downhill after that
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:00, Reply)

It tends to
Be glad you avoided sprogging. Children are lovely but they tied you to someone for a very long time, possibly forever.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:02, Reply)

I am more glad
than you could ever imagine.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:03, Reply)

Given what I know of your ex
I imagine rather a lot.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:06, Reply)

I can't commit to a box set of Sopranos, never mind kids.

( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:05, Reply)

Oddly enough I have no problem with comitment
Just the people I choose to commit to. To quote Dave Lister(and annoy Monty): "they're either heart-breakers or moral garbage on legs"
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:08, Reply)

Relationships are different.
I don't want someone depending on me like a child does. I can't stand neediness.
( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:11, Reply)

Children are awesome
but very hard work. I'm too much hard work myself to relish the through of having to help another human being survive 24/7. This may just be after the fact rationalisation, but I am happy with it.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:13, Reply)

I love my nephew to bits but I'm glad I can give him back to his mum at the end of the day.

( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:15, Reply)

*Depends*

(The Luggage is haunted..., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:25, Reply)

She started off nice enough, but turned into a loony.
I really hope I had nothing to do with this. Then again her mother was/is batshit insane.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:05, Reply)

Usually the way or else you'd neve get sucked into their life.
Same with bastards.
( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:09, Reply)

Well thanks for saving me from being the voice of misogyny once again.
and for those that don't know me, I'd like to add that must as I support the proposition "bitches be crazy", I'm equally a believer that "all men are bastards".

I think I may have to clone myself.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:15, Reply)

In short: 'people are ghastly'
I am not gender-specific in my distaste for human beings.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:30, Reply)

This is true.

( girlinthehole, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:32, Reply)

*curmugeonly fives*

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:33, Reply)

Screw you, I'm the voice of misogyny here.

( Kroney, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:34, Reply)

Not only can they get blurred, they can get snorted too.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:35, Reply)

Now I'm no lawyer but...
tell her to fuck off.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:58, Reply)

This I have done.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:59, Reply)

Tell her you'd be willing to have full custody of your daughter so she may move into a cheaper place.
And she should pay you child support.
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:03, Reply)

This is an excellent idea.
Not dissimilar to my response to her bleating about her lack of a social life etc: I will pick my daughter up at 7pm each Friday and return her to you at 7am the following Monday – every weekend, with pleasure.

No? Shut up and fuck off, then.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:19, Reply)

This may have been covered before, this is a big sub thread
but what are her justifications for you paying her way?
( Kroney, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 14:36, Reply)