I reckon I would do the same thing with Ansley Harriot, a foursome, me, ansley harriot and andi peters and...ermm.... I think b3th would like to join us, I doubt she's had jewish or black willy before, so it would be an experiance.
The trouble is that I know for a fact, out of the four of us, I would have the smallest willy, but Andley and Andi seem like a good sort who wouldn't tell everyone that, in comparison to the black mamba and black pudding, that I'm tiny.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:11, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I think I could make a good case though of being the one to get the bum, because I don't think b3th has much experiance with bum-fun...
... so in order for her not to really be hurt or put off, a comparsivly small one would be best suited for that job.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:13, Reply)

you know you're typing this, don't you?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:13, Reply)

In a way, it stops me looking so weird with the b3ta slashfic.

(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:14, Reply)

Does it.

( Kroney, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:33, Reply)

There is no shame in saying you can't compete, willy size wise, with Andi Peters or Ansley Harriot.
That's like saying you can't compete, car racing wise, with Louis Hamilton.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:15, Reply)

you're only assuming cock size
it could be they have tiny ones are are compensating
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:16, Reply)

I've shaken hands with ansley harriot before, it was like a putting a normal person holding a cadbury's creme egg next to a gorilla holding a mini-egg.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:16, Reply)

Ainsley Harriott has a tiny cock, though.
And I doubt you could get Andi Peters up a vajoo even if drugged and forced.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:18, Reply)

Nah',
tinyurl.com/TheLaughOfAManWithABigPenis
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:20, Reply)

I bet they called him 'Acorn Ainsley' in the PE showers at school.
That and 'that God-awful bellowing brute Harriott'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:20, Reply)

I reckon Brute is the gayest word there is.
One day I'm going to use it without being sarcastic, this'll be my misson.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:22, Reply)

1. Ring up Acorn Ainsley
2. Call him a brute
3. Hang up
4. ?????
5. PROFIT.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:24, Reply)

Well
This is awkward.






*tumbleweeds*
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:29, Reply)

Poor B3th, did the nasty Gonz upset you?
*offers consoling hug which no ulterior motive what so ever, honest*

*is lying*
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:35, Reply)

On re-reading it
and god knows why I bothered doing that, it seems that Gonz is implying I will have a larger willy than him.

I can assure you that this will not be the case. My willy is tiny.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:37, Reply)

No, he's implying that when he, Harriot and Peters take you airtight
he'd need to be the "tail-end charlie" as his insubstantial member would cause the least botty damage.

I'm almost sorry for explaining this. Almost.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:42, Reply)

Now I'm really not hungry.
That is such a disturbing image on so many levels.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:44, Reply)

Have you ever sought psychological help?

(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:13, Reply)

And if not, please don't.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:14, Reply)

You are so tiny you couldn't stick your cock in Ainsley's mouth and
"tickle those tastebuds"?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:14, Reply)

Give him a mouthful of 'Susie Semen'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:16, Reply)

Oh fucking hell.
you've got me thinking about the annoying cunt now.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:19, Reply)

Do you wiggle your bum and do a flaminco dance every time you add a bit of percy pepper or sally salt?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:25, Reply)

What did you speak with Ainsley about when you shook his hand?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:28, Reply)

I hope to god he said 'I really liked that song of yours 'You Sexy Thing'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:30, Reply)

Followed by 'I was so sorry to hear about you and Dawn French splitting up'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:31, Reply)

Then 'you should never have left South Park, that chef character of yours was brilliant'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:32, Reply)

Dawn French is single?

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:32, Reply)

Hahaha!
Now that Dawn French has moved out, Lenny Henry says he's going to convert her bedroom into a games room.

Which I imagine would just be a tyre on a rope...
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:33, Reply)

I would expect it's more likely to be a pool table or something
but then I'm not a massive racist.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:37, Reply)

As long as you get the black down at the end.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:40, Reply)

Fuck off, we're not impressed.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:43, Reply)

You should try some of those built-up shoes.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:42, Reply)

Acorn, hot chocolate etc.
Can't be bothered.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:31, Reply)

I can't remember, it was such a long time ago.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:47, Reply)

Yes. Then I neck a bottle of 'Covooonia' and then shit myself whilst looking like a sweaty malteser.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jul 2011, 13:29, Reply)