In a demonstration
that there really should be a 'Are you SURE you want to buy this item?' button on ebay, I am now the proud possessor of a suede coat that looks remarkably like something a seventies pimp would wear. What purchase have you regretted lately?

Alt: It's too early for lunch even for you fuckers, so tell me anything you like, preferably that puts you in an awful light on the internet
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:25, 135 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

How do you respond to someone telling you "I smoked a lot of crack when I was younger"?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:27, Reply)

Calling them skanky is apparently bad.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:27, Reply)

How about whore?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:27, Reply)

It doesn't show?
or

I licked a bit myself?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:27, Reply)

Probably the same way
I reacted when a very academic friend of mine, shyly told me she was going out with an ex heroin addict. She added that he'd relapsed 'but it was all better now'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:28, Reply)

Did she break his legs?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:30, Reply)

So basically sort of pull back with a look of disgust?
I'm pretty open about drugs but crack/heroin just make me think "scum"
(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Stone face it
because there really is nothing you can say that doesn't sound judgemental
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:31, Reply)

I couldn't :(
Standard sarcastic response sent, this is why I'm single.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:38, Reply)

Oops
More restraint needed next time
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:41, Reply)

She was telling me some bullshit "what if we're just percieving everything wrong"
philosophy that she couldn't really explain, but it might have been related to her smoking crack when she was younger.
I said there's a reason crack smokers aren't known as great thinkers.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:44, Reply)

Most great thinkers preferred opiates, didn't they?
But you were right to be dismissive I think.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:47, Reply)

You mean apart from the clicking of the button and the confirmation before the bid is accepted bit?
You mong!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:27, Reply)

It looked ace
and in some ways it looks even better in the reality, apart from the fact that it is a '70s pimp that should be wearing it, not me
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:29, Reply)

fo' sho
*rubs finger on teeth*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:30, Reply)

*slaps ho*

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:31, Reply)

you gotta keep your pimpin' hand strong.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:33, Reply)

I bought the worst chair in the world because of the lack of that button.
Only I had to rent a van to go and pick it up. Just for an added kick in the teeth, you understand.
( Kroney, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:28, Reply)

Naturally. The postage was the kicker on mine
given that it's a suede and fur knee length coat
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:31, Reply)

It sounds awesome.

( Kroney, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:35, Reply)

In one sense it really is
superb condition, only cost me £6.50 and it's incredibly warm. I just don't think I have any clothes that can be worn with a pimp coat
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:37, Reply)

Best go out buck nekkid underneath it then

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:40, Reply)

Jeans and boots would do, wouldn't it?
Listen to me, I sound like Barry.
( Kroney, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:41, Reply)

Needs MOAR violence and feuding

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:43, Reply)

Pics please!

( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:42, Reply)

Did you mean to post this under sportscow's response above?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:43, Reply)

No because Amberl will know I mean the coat.

( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:50, Reply)

Oh ok...
*dries sweaty hands*
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Not the best picture
will try and get one where the colours come out right- the coat is a lot lighter on btth the fur and suede bits tinypic.com/r/2hqf1iw/7
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:54, Reply)

Haha! it's not a pimp coat.
I can see it suiting you.
( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:55, Reply)

Looks alright to me
And I'm no pimp
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:56, Reply)

Worryingly my hair is a similar colour
it's quite a small fit because it has a heavy lining as well I think.

Edit: it also has a fur lined hood haha
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:59, Reply)

I b ought the wrong CD for my wife once!
2 birds, one stone, bosh!

EDIT also, she is a supermodel/porn star
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:29, Reply)

An 8 string, Goldtone mandolin,
on e-Bay. I can't play one, knew nothing about it and haven't touched it since it came out the box.
Basically, drunkenness and a credit card.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:32, Reply)

I thought a mandoline was a type of orange?!
LOL
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:34, Reply)

Kidnapped in Portugal?

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:36, Reply)

do they make oranges in portugal?
I've never seen an orange factory lol
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:36, Reply)

It can't be that hard to learn
Give it to me if you don't want it.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:34, Reply)

I once bought a girlfriend tickets to a gig it turned out she couldn't go to
That set me back quite a bit of money.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:33, Reply)

I've always wanted a rocking chair.
I bought a second hand one with a winged back to put in the loft bedroom. I forgot to check that it would actually fit up the narrow stairs of my terraced house. I just got it up to the spare room upstairs with scratched walls all along the landing and there was no way it was going to fit up the loft stairs.

Next time I re-decorate the hallway I have to decide whether I want to keep the chair or not before I do so.
( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:34, Reply)

We did this with a 2 seater settee that we got stuck halfway up the stairs on moving in day
When it came to getting it back out, I sawed it up
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:38, Reply)

Can't decide if this is true
Or an obscure Douglas Adams reference.
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:43, Reply)

It is true!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:46, Reply)

You are Richard MacDuff
AICMFP
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:49, Reply)

I've bought a couple of cars that I've eventually kind of regretted
but I can't think of anything I've instantly regretted.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:36, Reply)

Haven't regretted a single purchase from Ebay*
However, I do regret buying some cheese from a country fair a few weeks ago. Just rediscovered it in the back of my fridge, opened the packaging and nearly vommed myself inside-out from the smell. Good job it was in sealed packaging - bad idea to open it!

*Just scored an 84" remote control electrically operated screen** for my projector - £25.20!

**Awaits strike-throughs and humorous sex toy gags.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:38, Reply)

Haven't regretted a single purchase from Ebay* BUM POO WILLY BUM POO
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:40, Reply)

The key point here was "humorous"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:41, Reply)

It made me laugh!

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:41, Reply)

It was too obvious

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:42, Reply)

I did worry that everyone else may write the same, but I thought I'd risk it.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:44, Reply)

me too
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:42, Reply)

Me too.

( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:50, Reply)

I've never regretted a single purchase from ebay
mostly because I've never bought anything from there.

With the exception of shoddy chinese electronics which will probably break in a week, almost anything any sane person could want from there can be bought new, from a reputable shop, for less than you can pay second-hand on ebay.

I genuinely don't get the attraction. Unless you are actually after something you can't get anywhere else, of course, a la pimp-style inside out sheep.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:43, Reply)

I think the exception to that is clothes, they're fairly reasonable on Ebay
but I'm always suprised how much stuff is more expensive on Ebay than it is on ebuyer or amazon.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:46, Reply)

You might be right about clothes, at least second-hand stuff
I just don't think I could bring myself to buy second hand clothes that I'd only seen pictures of, and charity shops are still way cheaper than ebay. admittedly, that involves, y'know, going outside and talking to people, which is a problem for some people, but still.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:52, Reply)

I don't like charity shops.
They smell funny.
( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:52, Reply)

what, as opposed to second-hand clothes bought from internet shut-ins? ;)

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:56, Reply)

Well yes they smell funny too but I wash them first.
Got some really cheap Camper shoes and boots also.
( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:57, Reply)

Girls are different though aren't they, they'll buy something and never wear it then ebay it for half the price.
Because they're spastics.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:57, Reply)

^this
*shames*
( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:59, Reply)

I like clothing from ebay
I mostly buy coats and dresses and it's very rare anything isn't in excellent condition. But I'm a very cautious buyer with the obvious exception
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:57, Reply)

^this
I only really buy clothing from Ebay.
( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:52, Reply)

I very reguarly search on ebay for saxaphone =S

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:39, Reply)

Do you want an 8 string, Goldtone mandolin?
See my above posting. £400.00, and it's yours.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:47, Reply)

No way, I think aside that captain canderel fella, _nobody_ has gotten themselves laid due to their mandolin playing skills.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:50, Reply)

The sugar free version

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:54, Reply)

And how far are you getting with a lack of mandolin playing skills?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:55, Reply)

Slightly less,
than with one.
Go on, £350.00 cash and it's yours.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:57, Reply)

I'm probably going to get a bouzouki rather than a mandolin.
It was going to be a mandola, but they seem a bit pricey...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:02, Reply)

I bought a mandola from Ebay
It was wrongly listed as a mandolin - got it for £30.00 inc postage. I'm learning a few basic chords - sounds ok so far!
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:21, Reply)

That's a good price
I may have to come round and steal it...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:26, Reply)

excellent sales technique here

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:57, Reply)

Going once, going twice...

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:00, Reply)

Yeah', but £400 can do a lot of journeys, in both a metered or unmetered cab.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:00, Reply)

No good if you've got nowhere to go though

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:01, Reply)

Add the cost of the crack whore, say £50 .00,
and it's still a bargain.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:02, Reply)

I've heard Chompy's friend is free on Saturday

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:03, Reply)

"Heard",
meh.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:04, Reply)

I was trying to keep your girlfriend anonymous :(

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:12, Reply)

She advertises in phone booths, so it's not really an issue.

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:17, Reply)

Nononon, you're both getting it wrong, the cab journeys are a euthanisum for sleeping with a prostertute, weather they're charging by time or by act.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:19, Reply)

euthanisum?
You're not meant to kill them, just a bit of bareback anal.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:22, Reply)

I missed that subtlety
I don't know about the pricing range for prostitutes, but I'm pretty certain you get charged each time. The mandolin could impress more than one girl more than once.
Actually I don't know why I am presenting the case for you to buy it. It is nothing to me.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:34, Reply)

You're on 10% commission mate.

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:39, Reply)

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
'All literature started here' to paraphrase Hemmingway.

That's as maybe, but I can't get beyond page 2.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:39, Reply)

I wouldn't go as far as Hemingway,
but it's still a good book.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:46, Reply)

I'm sure it is
and I know the problem lies with my inability to adjust to informal way it's written, but I just can't get into the right mindset to persevere with it.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:47, Reply)

My earlier iPad mishap springs to mind.
Spread betting on ebay? Bad idea. Managed to sell them all on for a profit though :)
(The Luggage is haunted..., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:46, Reply)

All six parts of Winston Churchill's autobiography.
Never started to read them since I bought them seven years ago.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:49, Reply)

Even the most interesting of lives, which his surely was, can't require 6 volumes without some tedious filler, surely?

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:50, Reply)

I watched a film about him. He led a very full life from early on so I can see it needing six volumes.

( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:51, Reply)

He was in the last charge that the British ever did on horseback apparently.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:52, Reply)

His mum was a bit of a goer apparently.

( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:53, Reply)

He was a Druid and a bricklayer too.
I know some useless shit.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:55, Reply)

How long was the film then?
Was it the one I saw? With the pterodactyls and flying cars?
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Churchill: The Hollywood years
give you all you need to know about the man.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:11, Reply)

You should read them on the beaches

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:52, Reply)

Never has so much been written about so little.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:55, Reply)

for so long

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:57, Reply)

eBay is for second hand records
Well, I mean, I've heard there are other things available, but I've never really got beyond the records.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:08, Reply)

+ t-shirts, sweaters and fleeces.
Now that I am old enough not to give a fuck about wearing designer stuff, e-bay is where I get all my best clothes.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:14, Reply)

Not Burtons then?

( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:19, Reply)

They don't do my fat bastard size!!!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:20, Reply)

Wut! you're not that big and they do large sizes.

( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:21, Reply)

I am.
42 waist and 34/36 leg, most places do short leg and big waist. or long leg and smaller waist. Not both together.

Won't somebody think of the taller, fatter gentleman!!!?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:27, Reply)

They did.
they thought long and hard about it, and then went "either stop eating pies, cut your legs down, or you're on your own, sonny"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:29, Reply)

I NOE!!
It's glandular, ACTUALLY!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:30, Reply)

Gland pie

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Cake retention

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:54, Reply)

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:31, Reply)

This is a picture from a cartoon of some kind.
Perhaps it is relevant in some way, but I can't see it.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:35, Reply)

It's from an episode of Family Guy where Stewie talks about opening a clothes shop for big and tall men

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:38, Reply)

Oh right, I lost interest in cartoons since institutional racist and sexist shocker 'Tom and Jerry', that shit was edgy

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:41, Reply)

Do you smell of mildew as well ?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:34, Reply)

Lavender.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:53, Reply)

42" waist?
BGB is wrong, you are big.
And screw the taller, fatter gentleman - I'm tall and skinny which means I can either buy trousers that are long enough, but far too wide or the right width, but far too short.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:40, Reply)

But I'm ALL man.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:54, Reply)

man lard
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:59, Reply)

Sponge bob monopoly, was not expecting it to be a pc cd rom. Always read the fine print!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:16, Reply)

why would an adult buy that?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:24, Reply)

Because children can't own a paypal account?

( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:25, Reply)

why would you think Bobby is an adult?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:28, Reply)

this is a fairly adult forum silly

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:37, Reply)

Never bought anything on eBay
I did regret spending £200 on a coat off the internet but since it arrived I love it.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:19, Reply)

A good coat is always worth the money.

( girlinthehole, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:20, Reply)

Like a good frying pan.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 11:20, Reply)

Or a good mattress

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:00, Reply)

^wise words.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:01, Reply)

Or good bogroll.
Nothing worse than a rough shit-ticket.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:13, Reply)

Frying pans need to be good and heavy.
All the better to hit someone round the head with.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:01, Reply)

A good heavy gauge
That's them telt!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:02, Reply)

I always get a funny look
When swinging a frying pan in a shop. Makes me look like some kind of murderer or something.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Wed 12 Oct 2011, 12:11, Reply)