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(
rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Hey everyone, I'm not on holiday any more.I went to Milton Keynes yesterday, I know a lot of people like to joke about how awful it is, but really, having been there and driven through the "city centre" I have to say it really is one of the most awful, soulless, mind crushingly horrific places I have ever been to in my life.
Then as I was leaving I saw an old man running past a lake and I thought, actually, maybe it's not so bad, then I negotiated the 30th roundabout in 2 miles and realised that, yes, it was that bad.
So, other than posting the contents of your gaz box, what have you been up to the last couple of days?
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:24, 204 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
MorningDid you not take time out to look at the stone cows? MK landmark that.
Meetings most of yesterday, that and sweet talking the staff at Next to press a new shirt.
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:32,
Reply)
Woke up alone this morning with no recollection of going to bed.I instantly assumed I was in trouble of some kind or had been arguing but no, discovered a delicious wine last night and got so pissed with Lusty that she was, ah, 'taken ill' in the night and ended up sleeping in the sitting room as she kept having to get up.
In other news, my brother's going round that wanker from Jamiroquai's house this morning.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:32,
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JK? I hear hes even shorter than battered(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:34,
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Tell him to nick a car or two while he's thereMorning!
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:35,
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He's a better dancer than me as well. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:36,
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The first line needs to be sung in a bluesey manner.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:35,
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Drinking mainly, luckily got a night off tonightHow were your hols? Did you go to the Jorvik centre?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:34,
Reply)
I had a nice weekend mixing with the twin objects of your affectionsAnd have spent the last couple of days on an epic spring clean. Yay me. Only about 90% of the house left to go...
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:35,
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You spent the entire weekend playing with your breasts?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:36,
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I heard that B3th's are like spaniel's ears. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:45,
Reply)
I heard you once couldn't see a concert because a spaniel stood in front of you.(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:47, Reply)
I heard they looked like a dead heat in a zepplin race(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:47,
Reply)
I heard they looked like eggs nailed to a wall(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:07,
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I heard they the filling of an over stuffed bagel when you bite down too hard (it spills out the hole)(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:11,
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Morning AlNot a huge amount really, I watched The Green Hornet last night, that's alright. That's about as highly as I can compliment it though.
See, the roundabouts in MK wouldn't bother me, I'm used to them from growing up in Skem.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:36,
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Not too bad thanks, although I am rather tiredAnd my thumb is fucking killing me.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:53,
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No, I was playing football at the weekendI was in goal at one point, tried to save a ball blasted from rather close, slightly misjudged it, and had my thumb bent back in quite a painful way. Doctor there at the time told me to keep an eye on it, but if it keeps hurting, consider a hospital visit.
I know I probably should go to the hospital, but it feels stupid walking in with a sore thumb.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:01,
Reply)
You'd stick out like a sore thumb LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:04,
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Because of his deformed face.And because he would be listening to Green Day on his walkman and openly crying.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:05, Reply)
No chance, I haven't listened to Green Day in years, I quite like my Dad.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:06,
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MK has a stupid road grid system which is very annoying. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:37,
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I can only mention MK in a derogatory way.I'm glad I'm not the only one, as I'm sure Chompy takes it seriously.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:37,
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There's two 19th century pubs about 15 minutes walk from the town center(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:38,
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That makes up for the square miles of misery then(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:39,
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Sorry was I getting in the way of you be purposefully obtuse?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:42,
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mk is a conceptual 'city in a forest', beat that catford or where ever you live(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:46,
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It is a soulless wasteland for the most part, even you can't keep up arguing your point on thisNever been to catford, is it worth a visit?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:49,
Reply)
There are a lot of trees aroundbut I just don't like the number of dual carriageways you have to cross if you ever want to walk anywhere. It's a city designed entirely for cars.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:50, Reply)
trees provide excellent cover for stalking and rapes(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:52,
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The area where milton keynes now is has been inhabited since saxon times and there's an medieval abbey and Roman ruins around(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:41,
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That is so, and then it was decided to build up all around with monstrous concrete.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:42,
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there's also the achingly beautiful cycle network 'the redways'(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:44,
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It's OK in MKthat's what they rap down the Milton Keynes youth centre annual 'rap battle'
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:48,
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Am I the only person who gets this?I think I may be.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:49,
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i've ripped it off from a post from 2009(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:50,
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I caught a train to London from Milton Keynes once.True story.
Just waiting for an appropriate qotw to flesh this out a bit with tales of petty theft and unlikely sex.
The last couple of days have been no different from any other randomly chosen couple of days.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:41,
Reply)
Oh, I was hoping something fun might have happened and you could all have told me about itand it would have been fun.
I'm sad that dozy didn't come and find me after I told him where I was twice.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:43, Reply)
No he didn't he was at home less than finve minutes down the roadhe just said he didn't like me, which makes no sense because 1) I'm a lovely person and 2) he gave me all that advice about York.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:46, Reply)
Did you remember to thank him?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:49,
Reply)
Andrew says a lot of nasty things about mebut, he was the only person being nice the other evening when everyone thought my dad had died. So that means he secretly likes me.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:51, Reply)
we were all reaching out to al during this difficult time(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:53,
Reply)
I espcially like how you wanted to make sure you left the appropriate lenght of time for grieving.(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:56, Reply)
So were you pretending to have a dead dad?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:59,
Reply)
I never did any such thing.Quinten and I were having INTERNET BANTER ONLINE and someone else took it out of context.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:01, Reply)
Ah ok, just checking your not turning into a needy Internet lier(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:03,
Reply)
did you have a nice time in York?I expect nothing less than a point by point, pint by pint breakdown.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:51, Reply)
Yes I didapart from the sadness caused by not seeing you.
We went to the Brewery and the railway museum and we walked around the walls and we had some nice food and I drank quite a lot of beer.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:53, Reply)
We had a roast in the Royal Oakwe had some chips from the chip shop on that road, not Mr CHippys, but the other one. We had Calzone in that italian place on that other road near the Minster and we had afternoon tea in a little cafe which wasn't Betty's but was nearby.
We also had some food in the Cross Keys on the first night.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:58, Reply)
It's a reference to Dozer's 'alternative' leaningsand, I believe, a row he got into with Wilf Lunn about his credentials in that sphere.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:52,
Reply)
Wilf is a steampunk prick.Apparently I am 'mainstream' because I like electronic music and don't dress like a Victorian spastic.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:57, Reply)
In his defense he is high on lithium most of the time and gets run over by carsthat's pretty alternative
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:58,
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Good old Foggsy,always on hand with some poorly-thought-out patronising moral-high-ground whingeing.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 8:59,
Reply)
Oh him. Is Wilf his real name or is Wilf Lunn a historical figure who I don't know?(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:00, Reply)
TV 'personality' with a stupid moustache. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:02,
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Former tv inventor.Used to be on Jigsaw. Big tache.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:01,
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*points at nose**points at DG*
Gotcha*
* hasn't gotcha at all, but I assume this is just something that old people find hilarious so I'll laugh with you and let it go.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:04, Reply)
Calm down Noel Edmonds.(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:08,
Reply)
I've been reading about Shane MacGowan and thinking 'Hmm...maybe I didn't drink so much after all'and rueing that an office move has left me sitting next to my boss so I'm largely B3taless now.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:04,
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not really scarpobaz, cq, and now this
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:06,
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Well obviously I am by far the greater loss and really you ought to all just pack up and go home really, because it won't be the same anymore.(
scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:10,
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At the risk of pissing on your chips here.If Shane MacGowan is the best person you can look to, to find someone who drank more, then you probably did drink quite a bit.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:12,
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Well, yes, I wasn't being entirely serious...(
scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:13,
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YOU SHOULD MAKE THIS MORE CLEAR!When will you learn that we all take everything you say at face value?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:14,
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I took my little girl to her taster day at schooland made a couple of gallons of blackcurrant wine. Then I watched the Muppets movie. I also had a curry and a shag. I am reading the Wanted Graphic novel which is a quite different from the shit film and actually pretty good.
(
Peej, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:08,
Reply)
THE WANTED HAVE A GRAPHIC NOVEL?!?!!? OMG I HOPE ITS AS GOOD AS THE JLS ONE(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:11, Reply)
i can't think of a single one of their songs, but at least one of them is good looking(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:26, Reply)
no, you dirty middeni had this spare sock right, no idea where it came from, it was in with my washing, looked absolutely nothing like one of my socks (it was elasticated and long and thin like a ladies sock), so i put it on my bedside cabinet to see if the other one turned up
found it on monday, still not sure whose sock it is
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:15, Reply)
I've been noting our local serial killer.First that kid from the Rose's gig, well dodgy. Then next, this from the local rag. This fits in well, with the serial killer thread from yesterday.
menmedia.co.uk/manchestereveningnews/news/s/1583084_concern-grows-for-teenager-shane-carter-missing-in-manchester-city-centre
Hope they get the fucker, if it's connected.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:11, Reply)
I say he should be knighted and given a full pardon.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:13,
Reply)
I hope they move to London and target your daughter.And finish off with a nice big bowl of dry meat.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:16, Reply)
Rza has a martial arts film coming out soon. Co written with Eli Roth and presented by Tarantino. (
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:26,
Reply)
Oh wow tihs sounds totally amazing.There is no way that Quentin Tarantino would ever put his name to a substandard film.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:27, Reply)
In all honesty, I didn't enjoy Reservoir DogsBut I'm willing to give it another chance, as I was probably a bit too young to 'get it'
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:37,
Reply)
The films he actually directs, I generally think are pretty goodbut the ones where he just lets people say "Tarantino presents" while not actually having any input, are usually utter garbage.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:34, Reply)
Pulp Fiction was excellent.good acting, excellent direction and an interesting plot.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:36, Reply)
I didn't enjoy Kill Bill, and I haven't seen Jackie BrownBut I do fucking love Pulp Fiction, so I suppose it all balances out.
I've also just seen he was involved in Natural Born Killers, another fucking excellent film.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:38,
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Did I express an opinion on it? Or just provide info on something I thought monty might find interesting?(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:33,
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Rza knows his martial arts films though.I trust him not to put out a shit one and am consequently rather pleased about this.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:38,
Reply)
Have you ever seen 'Kung Fu Hustle'?Nothing to do with RZA, just curious.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:40,
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I have, I liked it but wasn't blown away.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:32,
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The trailer looks a bit shit but I am willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, plus the soundtrack will be boss(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:40,
Reply)
Any film with Batista in is not one I can take seriously.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:33,
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Yeah but you can take loads of sweets from the confectionary stand(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:41,
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call the police?call the fashion police, more like.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:23,
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Greedy bastardSpeaking of which, here's some good news for the day - www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/18792684
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:29,
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\o/Leavin' under a jet plane
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:31,
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Makes no difference to me, I wouldn't listen to Radio One no matter who they stick in front of the mic(
Peej, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:32,
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I'm willing to give his replacement a chanceThe guy that has replaced Chris Evans on Radio 2 is a right twat.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:34,
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My lift listens to radio 2 on the way inChris Evans still does the breakfast show doesn't he?
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Peej, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:36,
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He's off at the minute, I thinkHis replacement is some Irish cunt
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:39,
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Ryan tubridyeveryone loves him
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:42,
Reply)
god its been ages since i had a sausage sandwichthis italian near my girlfriends does amazing bacon and sausage sandwiches, I love that Giuseppe
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:31, Reply)
What on earth could possibly be rank about a sausage and bacon sarnie?Stick an egg on top and I'm in heaven.
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Peej, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:33,
Reply)
If you had cheese on that, I'd agree.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:39,
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it's FCUKEN BEAUTIFULhuge, doorstep thick bread, two sausages halved down the middle, a couple of bacon rashers, crispy as fuck, smothered in brown sauce and the sexed straight into your face
lovelyq
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:34, Reply)
Oh Q the least you can do is have a little wash first(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:43,
Reply)
it sounds like a fatty salty heart attackin stale bread
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:42,
Reply)
once ina while, its lovelyyou know, like sex, you remember sex, don't you swipe?
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:51, Reply)
A breakfast butty, or sex with with Swipe...Mmmm...strokes hairy chin.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:54, Reply)
Buttery sex with swipeala Brando
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:00,
Reply)
like a dog with two dickshappy as a quentin with two 'nanas
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:32,
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Much overtime and workingThis is a good thing as I've got bedroom furniture and carpets to pay for. I also had to bollock our apprentice yesterday as he fucked up big style
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:30,
Reply)
Carpet?Why would anyone put carpet down on perfectly good Oak flooring?
Oh, you don't have oak flooring? You poor thing, lets get this War on Povos kicked off quick!
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Peej, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:38,
Reply)
Ape has oak flooringWhy would I want it?
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:59,
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did he restart instead of turning it off and on again(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:42,
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How terrifying is a bollocking from sportscow really?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:42,
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he looks a bit angry, but he's got a piss streak down his leg so it all balances out(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:44,
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I'm just a big old softy really(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:58,
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I imagine it's all"Gies a hug. Aah cannat steah mad at ya, ya daft fucka"
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:01,
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Pretty muchBut with more cunt
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:05,
Reply)
'S one of those urban legends, innit?Reportedly, a pilot once said "Now, ladies and gentlemen, if you look out of to the left you'll be able to see Milton Keynes. Let me assure you, ladies and gentlemen, this is the best way to see Milton Keynes - from 35,000 feet with low cloud cover." ELLOHELL.
I have been doing as little as is humanly possible. Plus, running. How was your holiday?
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Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:44,
Reply)
It was nice thanksHav you got yourself a GPS watch yet? You'll stick out like a sore thumb on the Bristol half if you don't have a GPS watch.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:50, Reply)
my mate is running an ultra marathon on Friday40 miles...
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:52,
Reply)
come to think of it, he's not even your mate eitheryou just overheard it on the bus this morning
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:56,
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amazing insight here based on pure guesswork, well done(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 9:59,
Reply)
stop getting angry when I'm right(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:01,
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Woah.A friend of mine did a centurion (100 miles) in march. 20 hours, the mentalist.
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Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:06,
Reply)
So this means you're going to be one of the cool kids and come to Bristol and run the half?Go On! You know you want to!
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:11, Reply)
I will, I will.I just need to wait til payday to sign up for it. God, stop being so needy, man!
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Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:12,
Reply)
I too went to Milton Keynes yesterday Luckily I didn't have to stay long. It really is a soulless concrete wasteland.
In other news, my hangover has abated to the point where I might be able to eat a bacon sandwich.
(, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 10:04, Reply)
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