It's a mix
Just as some people are nice, and others brave, and others smart, and others racist, and others cruel, and others dishonest - so are the police. In general they're alright, although their disregard for established case law when I disputed a speeding ticket irked me somewhat.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 13:51, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

would this "established case law" be you trying to weasel your way out of a conviction for something you clearly did?
and you wonder why they wanted to disregard it?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 13:53, Reply)

Clearly your lawyer wasn't expensive enough.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 13:55, Reply)

Haha.
The lawyer I used when I was taken to court for speeding was actually quite expensive, but was a mate so it didn't cost me owt. However and I made no attempt to weasel out of it.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 13:57, Reply)

funnily enough
i've never had a single client complain that i am "not expensive enough".
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:02, Reply)

YANAL, maybe?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:05, Reply)

You are not Anal enough?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:05, Reply)

Indeed.
And you can't even post a reply in the right place, so that's proving something.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:05, Reply)

If you weren't weaseling out of it
why did you need to go to court?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:03, Reply)

Because if you're going fast enough
you get taken to court anyway, so that the punishment can be set higher.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:04, Reply)

My dad didn't have to go to caught
they handed him a massive fine, but he didn't actually have to appear.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:05, Reply)

Ah, right, yeah.
No, I didn't appear, I used a solicitor to plead by letter. So, of course, I could have done it without a solicitor, but obviously I wanted advice on whether it's advisable to show up or not, as you do get a summons.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:07, Reply)

This, obviously, being one of the very few occasions
where I figured "asking b3ta" probably wasn't a sound plan.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:08, Reply)

Yeah, my dad just sent a letter.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:08, Reply)

I heard you can go whatevr speed you like as long as it's a prime

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 13:56, Reply)

It was a technicality
The law states a fixed penalty notice must reach you within 14 days of the offence, mine took 16 days.

I pointed this out, they said "no, we have to send it within 14 days".

I pointed out that was not in fact what the law said, and referenced a case where that was the decision.

They said, "no, we're right, let's go to court - or you can just take the fixed penalty". At which point I caved.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:10, Reply)

It states the rules re. service on the back of the letter you know. Citing case law as a lidl value Nick Freeman must have caused loads of lols
you knob
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:14, Reply)

And those rules agreed with me!
I just didn't want to take a day off and stand in front of a judge with my crappy excuse for why I shouldn't pay sixty fucking quid.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:17, Reply)

Probably wise. Since those are only the rules for fixed penalties.
I'm fairly sure they can do you for speeding at their own leisure, without bothering with a fixed penalty. It's just designed to save courts and the police and you time.

So even if you were right, the fact the fixed penalty wasn't done correctly is probably no barrier to them taking you to court for speeding anyway. Whereupon the fine would be means-tested rather than fixed and the court would have your balls for being a bit of a prick about it.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:25, Reply)

i got caught twice in two days, in the same place
fucking sneaky hiding pig bastards
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:27, Reply)

They were hiding when they caught me
which, bizarrely, is legal in Scotland but supposed to be not allowed in England and Wales.

However, I was going a bit quick. So, fair cop.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:36, Reply)

they were hiding a mile down the road beyond a speed camera that everyone slows for
it's a 40 limit on a dual carriageway ffs, stoopid westcountry yokels
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:37, Reply)

The problem here is that those whose job it is to uphold the law have little to no training in law.
That and the fact that you were caught speeding, which is one law even a copper can understand.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:00, Reply)

The devices used to register speed have varying degrees of error

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:01, Reply)

yes.
But the margins are much smaller than the leeway you are given above the speed limit.

And people who try and use shit like this to get off something they are demonstrably guilty of are, frankly, cunts.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:03, Reply)

do you mean leighway, tmb?

(quintsy, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:11, Reply)

no, I'm pretty sure I mean leeway.
as in from the space allowed for ships to drift. But I could be wrong, wouldn't be the first time.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:16, Reply)

lee·way/ˈlēˌwā/
Noun:

The amount of freedom to move or act that is available.
Margin of safety: "there is little leeway".

Also has 7.7 million google hits compared to 132000 for leighway which appears to be a place in or near Staines.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:19, Reply)

The A436, renamed after Lee Donovon was tragically killed in a bizarre white van/veal truck accident
4 eva in R hartz
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:22, Reply)

*cough*BOLLOCKS*cough*

(Bazongaloid, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:03, Reply)

I get this all the time, I killed someone for littering once by mounting the pavement, but managed to get off in the end having cited the 'batman defence'
fucking pricks totally wasting my time
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:01, Reply)

you know what
in criminal cases, death by driving is hard to prove. you have to prove their was intent or dangerous driving.

what i'm saying is if you want to kill someone do it with a car, sentences are lighter than outright murder and you may even get away with a motoring offence rather than a conviction

that's all
(quintsy, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:02, Reply)

max sentence for DBDD 14 years, you'd serve seven
that's all i'm saying
(quintsy, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:03, Reply)

WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TAKE THE HINT AND RUN THAT PRICK PLMDZR OVER FOR ME PLEASE?

(quintsy, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:03, Reply)

hello comedy person

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:06, Reply)

it was about bloody time somebody started some comedy around here

(quintsy, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:09, Reply)

hello

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:06, Reply)

its just me quinton, no shakes

(quintsy, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:09, Reply)

ITS QUINTIN !

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:12, Reply)

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

(quintsy, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:14, Reply)

Or is it?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:14, Reply)

Check his DNS address and IP signature

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:14, Reply)

re-route the mainframe! somebody get the CPU on the motherboard!
dammit man, we're running out of KUDOs!
(quintsy, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:16, Reply)

I've missed you the most Q

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:23, Reply)

Could you please explain what those things mean, for those who don't understand as well as you do?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:16, Reply)

*sits back with popcorn*

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:19, Reply)

I had some cake

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:20, Reply)

He doesn't have a DNS address, he's a person behind a private router, not a website.
*bites*

*kicks self*
( Kroney, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:24, Reply)

Can still be traced
they manage to find naughty pirates OK.

*kicks Kroney*
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:29, Reply)

He said DNS and IP
IP is valid, man! Stop kicking me :(
( Kroney, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:30, Reply)

*stops kicking*
*searches for bentspastic.Co.UK*
*search returns naked_ape*
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:35, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1737073
(quintsy, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:14, Reply)

there's more comedy accounts out there ? I'm totes out of the loop man

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:15, Reply)

Honda accord?

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:04, Reply)

with vtec stickers

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:08, Reply)

Fuckin' Justice!

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:09, Reply)

I was charged with public order offences
but I pointed out that I had said "Cheers" afterwards so they let me off since the Legless defence if legally bulletproof.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:04, Reply)

I once got a school bully raped once, needless to say she later killed herself rofl

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:07, Reply)

That's the last time I do you a favour btw.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:18, Reply)

Can you just tell us what you've done with Barrys remains? There's a poor mother who just wants to bury her son and you've stuck him into the footings of a new superwarehouse in romford or some shit. The jokes over man

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:24, Reply)

RIP Barry.
I bet he was looking forward to the bash too, loads of thieving opportunities.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:26, Reply)

Never!
Barry will never RIP.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:27, Reply)

Similarly, I got off several rape cases
since the victims admitted I had shouted "surprise!" immediately beforehand.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:07, Reply)

does anyone know what the required conditions for cutting off a drug dealer's head is?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:16, Reply)

The police aren't interested in investigating this sort of crime.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:18, Reply)

Does it need to be raining?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:19, Reply)

It can't hurt
nobody likes standing around in the rain.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 24 Sep 2012, 14:20, Reply)