New armagoddamnmotherfuckinggeddon thread
Ms Foxtrot has the Norovirus. According to all the wise sources, my chances of avoiding the same are slimmer than Monty's pay packet after outgoings. What advice would you give me, of a non-DYAAKY nature?

Alt: Best/worst/funniest illness stories

AltAlt: Gay marriage law should get passed today, who wants an invite?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:27, 173 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Get it, lose some weight.
Although your happy pills won't work because your system turns into a two way drainpipe.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:33, Reply)

Am trying to get off them as it happens
Not opposed to some rapid weight loss but am borderline emetophobic so actually quite fearful of getting it.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

You'll be pretty delirious so you won't have much chance to be phobic.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:38, Reply)

I'd just lie in the bath with a hot shower running while vomitting and shitting it out.

( Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:40, Reply)

Nice
Al soup
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:40, Reply)

I wouldnt' have the plug in.

( Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:41, Reply)

For 72 hours?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)

Norovirus is actually quite a clever virus.
It has no intention of killing its parasitic host, merely use it as a vehicle for getting to the next one.
From what I gather, you could stand to go on the noro-diet, so suck it up.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:39, Reply)

up off
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:41, Reply)

psssst.
this is what all viruses do.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:43, Reply)

Oh.
I thought some would kill you.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:43, Reply)

Like the AIDS virus for example?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:46, Reply)

Damn those viruses masquerading as immune deficiency sydromes.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:48, Reply)

+n

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:51, Reply)

nah, I was talking about that Syd Barrett chap off of Pink Floyd.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:53, Reply)

Oh, yeah, sorry.
They will, I meant they all exist as parasitic vehicles to move from one host to the other. Actually, none of them give a shit whether they kill you or not. But some (ebola springs to mind) aren't quite as "good" because they tend to kill you before they can spread.

Although, drop a good dose of Ebola in central London and that might not quite be so true
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)

I shall take this advice on board, thanks.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:49, Reply)

Ebola does like to go out in a blaze of glory though
to try and maximise its range of infection...

Wasnt there some experiment with monkeys with an infected one at one end of a 30ft room and healthy at the other and with days it had mooched across the open and clean space.

Then of course it was explody time...
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:57, Reply)

Exploding poo monkeys?
Brilliant.
Why don't ITV make Saturday night programmes like this?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:59, Reply)

wait till the season finale
of splash... explody z listers
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:08, Reply)

SPLAT!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:09, Reply)

Admittedly I'm not a scrawny fucker like you
but I can remember the taste of steak
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:43, Reply)

what is it with all the pooves here on anti depressants?
Is life hard for proles or. What?
(quintsy, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:53, Reply)

Buttfuck her better

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:33, Reply)

This wins

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:36, Reply)

yeah, if you're turned on by this
www.travelblog.org/Photos/464541
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

That is quality
Sexy quality
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:38, Reply)

Award each bout of sharting marks out of ten for splatter, force and grunting

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:39, Reply)

lol

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:38, Reply)

hahahahahaha!
*click*
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:41, Reply)

Unblocking drains

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

treat her like a plague victim,
wear a medical mask, wash your hands after every contact with anything she might have touched in the last 3 days, don't share cutlery or cups or plates. In fact, just do what AW said.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)

Spray everything in sight with neat bleach, then jetwash it.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)

Clingfilm

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:38, Reply)

Over the toilet
wait as hilarity ensues.
( Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:40, Reply)

Or just clingfilm Mrs Darth

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:41, Reply)

It is mainly spread by the transfer of faecal matter by the hands.
So if you do get it, it is because your girlfriend is a shitty poo-hands.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)

^this wins the internet.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)

officecoffeesplutter

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:43, Reply)

oh lol
*orders new keyboard*
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)

There's fuck all you can do
if she's been diagnosed, if you're going to get it, it'll be quietly incubating already.

Noro's not particularly bad, just deal with it. Chopper says "harden the fuck up"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)

I'm hard

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:44, Reply)

+ in the boys shower.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:57, Reply)

textbook

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:09, Reply)

Top advice here from a science professional, no less.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:44, Reply)

It's not bad for normal people. But lets just say I expect him to be in an "at risk" group.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:44, Reply)

Immuno compromised if you will.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:46, Reply)

not enough fruit, or too much?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)

Wrong kind

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:49, Reply)

But it feels so right!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:51, Reply)

Time off work innit
The online advice is of much the same content, if not bedside manner. "Tough shit sunshine, you'll have 24 hours of spraying from both ends, drink plenty of water and flush it through"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)

See also:
Feeling like death
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:46, Reply)

Get her a pole-dancing lesson
and watch the brown-spraying Catherine wheel lolz ensue.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:44, Reply)

Get her outside on the rotary washing line
She could mulch the borders
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)

Brown girl in some pain
Tra la la la laaaaa
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:51, Reply)

Show me your motion
Tra la la la la
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:52, Reply)

She looks like a sprinkler's up her bum
bum bum
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:54, Reply)

lols all round chaps

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:55, Reply)

have a nice cup of tea and contemplate death

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)

altalt:


" This bill in no way makes a requirement of faithfulness from same-sex couples. In fact, it does the opposite.

In a heterosexual marriage a couple can divorce for adultery, and adultery is if you have sex with a member of the opposite sex. In a heterosexual marriage a couple vow to forsake all others ... A gay couple have no obligation to make that vow [to faithfulness] because they do not have to forsake all others because they cannot divorce for adultery. There is no requirement of faithfulness. And if there is no requirement of faithfulness, what is a marriage?"

Nadine Dorries is a twat.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)

Yeah and you can't divorce someone for having a gay affair.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:49, Reply)

T W A T

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:51, Reply)

Oh so you've met Chompy?

( Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:57, Reply)

:(((((((((((

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:12, Reply)

You needed some further confirmation of the fact she's a twat?

Actually, I dunno who it was, some Etonian backbencher I think, raised the twat bar to new and epic heights on the radio on this one yesterday. Something like "Marriage has been an insitution between one man and one woman for hundreds of years, and as a government, who are we to consider we have the rights to change such an insitution?"

Erm, you're the fucking government. Changing stuff is what you are FOR, you feckless prick.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:52, Reply)

Every fucking time one of those cunts starts talking they all say "I'm not against gay people"
It's the new "I'm not a racist but..."
( Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:55, Reply)

You should totally kick their wing mirrors off.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:56, Reply)

I would, but they get taxis everywhere.

( Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:56, Reply)

Y'know with all this poo talk, I'd forgotten all about the alts.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:52, Reply)

well,
as you see, I hadn't.
What is the vegetarian hippy stance in all this? Remember, you are speaking on behalf of your people.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:56, Reply)

Some cliched bollocks about 'any kind of love being alright'

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:57, Reply)

Wouldn't want them living next door to me, mind.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:58, Reply)

Alice?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:58, Reply)

he would answer
but by now tangles will be so weak from the lack of proper food the screen will be blurry
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:05, Reply)

Yes, yes she is. A massive fucking twat.
The second-best thing about this bill being passed will be hearing the excuses various fuckknuckles in the Commons give for selective prejudice.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:02, Reply)

I think they deserve to be as miserable as the rest of us fannymagnets.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:03, Reply)

My only objection to gay marriage is that it will lead to gay divorce
and THAT is going to get bitchy.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:04, Reply)

quote your sources

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:05, Reply)

"Tomatoes, Malt Vinegar (from Barley), Molasses, Glucose-Fructose Syrup, Spirit Vinegar, Sugar, Dates, Modified Cornflour, Rye Flour, Salt, Spices, Flavourings, Tamarind"

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:09, Reply)

This is a shit joke.
Sorry everyone.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:09, Reply)

You know what to do...

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:10, Reply)

*Heinz over the pun-baton*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:10, Reply)

And i have already told you to get to fuck sunshine
divvinie make me drive over there
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:10, Reply)

Blah, blah, sugar, more sugar, blah, actual sugar, blah, blah, blah.

( Kroney, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:11, Reply)

Thanks "Def Leppard"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:11, Reply)

Steve Gribbin, Glastonbury 2007, IIRC

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:09, Reply)

Ah I think I first heard
Jimmy Carr using that line
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:11, Reply)

I reckon Carr nicked it
Because if it happens the other way round, the poor cunt who no-one's ever heard of gets heckled to fuck
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:17, Reply)

Am I reading this correctly?
Say for example I was married to an actual woman and not to my Princess Leia RealDoll. If I bummed an actual man (and not my Han Solo RealDoll), my actual female wife couldn't legally divorce me for adultery according to this columnist?
( Kroney, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:05, Reply)

according to an MP kroney, nadine dorries is an MP.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:07, Reply)

You're going to tell me she's not in some sideline nuthouse party like the BNP as well, aren't you.

( Kroney, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:10, Reply)

She is sort of a Tory
but given that they've withdrawn the whip, she's kind of not really any party.
( Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:12, Reply)

She's a jungle cunt.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:13, Reply)

She's Goldie?

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:14, Reply)

G
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:15, Reply)

Heyyy, BK. Long time!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:17, Reply)

How do!
Yeah been a while. I spotted this thread on arse-spraying mayhem and couldn't resist.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:18, Reply)

You can't teach it, mate.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:19, Reply)

Too true.
How's yourself?
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:22, Reply)

Oi oi Keloid. Alright?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:22, Reply)

Not bad mate, you?

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:23, Reply)

In the pub. So good.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:26, Reply)

YO BK MY MAIN NIGGAH

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 17:13, Reply)

Pretty good knockers, for her age.

( Kroney, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:15, Reply)

this is true
See also:
Gillian Taylforth in the papers today.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:15, Reply)

Obg

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:22, Reply)

obg?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:24, Reply)

Old but good.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:26, Reply)

*notes*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:31, Reply)

It's old but gold.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:56, Reply)

What Al said.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:16, Reply)

Also don't touch her phone
Apparently there's more faecal bacteria on movies than on toilet seats
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:52, Reply)

I dont watch THOSE kind of films

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:53, Reply)

Stupid a/c predictive phone bollocks
*mobiles*
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:55, Reply)

well, some films are utter shit
but what's her phone got to do with it?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:54, Reply)

Alt:
My mate Angela turned a lovely shade of yellow many years ago (including her eyes) when she got a kidney infection. That was quite funny.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 15:58, Reply)

*benhardwicklols*

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:00, Reply)

I've known a couple of hardcore caners who had a yellow pallor.
Their kidneys had a lot to deal with.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:01, Reply)

She was banana yellow
and didn't like it when I called her steakand
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:03, Reply)

That's a pretty jaundiced view

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:05, Reply)

Are you sure it isn't their livers?
It sounds like jaundice to me.
( Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:06, Reply)

Yeah, you're right here.
Stupid sporto, going on about kidneys.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:07, Reply)

He really is an epic spastic of nearly nakers proportion.

( Bazongaloid, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:09, Reply)

Woooaahh
hang on there, I agree he is a bit of a Hawkins foot, but WTN thats harsh man, harsh
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:13, Reply)

No, I really am WTN

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:15, Reply)

I didnt want you to go full Gazza

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:36, Reply)

*strips*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:37, Reply)

Gets fishing rod and chicken sarnies

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:40, Reply)

Serious answer
Play the concerned partner routine and look after her, then when you need your arse wiped she'll be more likely to help
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:15, Reply)

Stock up on Imodium and MTFU
Alt: My mum, LOL.

AltAlt: No-one.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:16, Reply)

I think I'd rather shit it all out than bung it up with Imodium

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:17, Reply)

I backpacked Egypt and Israel when I was a nipper
and was eating this stuff as I was so ill. It is unpleasant to be ill and not be able to have a crap!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:19, Reply)

Yeah, if you are out somewhere then get the cork in
At home, shit like a boss
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:19, Reply)

/\ rule of life

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:22, Reply)

And on work's time if at all possible.

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:22, Reply)

With a poo calculator so you know how much you earned.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:23, Reply)

Particularly satisfying if you're a 99'er.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:26, Reply)

Mr Whippy shitty?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:37, Reply)

That said, I would definitely do some freaky scat with Darth's Mrs.
Just sayin'.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:23, Reply)

hahahaha!
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1853766
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:24, Reply)

I can't tell whether to be flattered, repulsed or appalled.
I'll have to settle for aroused.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:24, Reply)

Is there any other type of scat?

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:24, Reply)

Weee ba da da da daaaaa

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:25, Reply)

I wanted to make a joke based on this
but, appropriately enough, everything I came up with was shit.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:27, Reply)

Worse than mine?
Really?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:31, Reply)

Afraid so
A bunch of laboured "John" puns
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:36, Reply)

*shakes head*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:37, Reply)

I have.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:27, Reply)

Hahahaha course you have sweetheart
You are most likely the last person on this board she'd fuck. Unless you were wearing platform shoes
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:28, Reply)

Fuck nose how he'd reach

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:30, Reply)

It wasn't a problem.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:33, Reply)

Because she was unconscious on the floor.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:47, Reply)

Yes.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:52, Reply)

gave her the full on Cyrano treatment

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:39, Reply)

Best comment in my FB feed about the gay marriage debate:
"Homosexuals are entitled to make the same hideous mistakes as the rest of us"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:40, Reply)

Excellent.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:41, Reply)

Gonz, is this anything to do with you?
I seem to remember you mentioning something like this years ago

www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-21335032
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:41, Reply)

Poor old BGB
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-21340238
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:43, Reply)

Fuck
That is grim
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:44, Reply)

Don't be 'orrible to BGB.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:48, Reply)

Funnily enough, I was planning on texting her this week to see how she is.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:51, Reply)

Good man.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:53, Reply)

Haven't seen her since Brizzle.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:55, Reply)

I haven't even seen her post anything.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:55, Reply)

Would have been if my bosses at the time wasn't a bunch of criminals.
I never got to launch my product, which would have to be re-developed to release to market these days (on the basis of standards changing; although the theories on how to charge are all tight).

I'm more one of the " half a dozen similar ideas were already on offer to the capital's taxi and minicab users.".
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:50, Reply)

you'd have needed black cab drivers on board
not that shower of minicab cunts you'd worked with
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 17:35, Reply)

Or you could hail a cab in the street which won't cost anything.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 5 Feb 2013, 16:55, Reply)