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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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 That's enough pulling of teeth
	That's enough pulling of teethMy new boss is in the office today. He's a gay. Middle management here I come! Ever used sex as a weapon? Ever flirted your way to the top? Ever HAD sex? Be honest.
Alt: Which b3tan would you most like to be your boss? Or your employee?
AltAlt: Boris Johnson eh, WORRALEGEND, hahahahahahahahahahaha
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 13:59, 191 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
 I've had sex two times
	I've had sex two timesBut it didn't take. Won't be trying it again.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:02, Reply)
 Make this moist, stick that in there, pump so-and-so
	Make this moist, stick that in there, pump so-and-soI mean...who needs it?
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:06, Reply)
 I hate people that brownnose, or promote their friends.
	I hate people that brownnose, or promote their friends.It was endemic in the massive insurer I worked for.
Alt- I'd genuinely like to work for Battered.
Alt alt- he's a prickster.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:02, Reply)
 Does beating bears to death with your penis count as using sex as a weapon?
	Does beating bears to death with your penis count as using sex as a weapon?if so, that.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:03, Reply)
 Are you asking me permission to post something?
	Are you asking me permission to post something?This is quite a change in the existing dynamic
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:10, Reply)
 I wouldn't employ any of you. I know how workshy you all are from the amount of time you spend pissing about online.
	I wouldn't employ any of you. I know how workshy you all are from the amount of time you spend pissing about online.(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:06, Reply)
 If I ever need someone to come to the office & lick all the windows I will let you know.
	If I ever need someone to come to the office & lick all the windows I will let you know.(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:16, Reply)
 but seriously I'm eminently employable
	but seriously I'm eminently employableyou'd be lucky to have me, tbh, I doubt you could afford me anyway
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:21, Reply)
 Oh come on
	Oh come onYou'd give me a job in front of house staff cos I'm SO PRETTY
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:10, Reply)
 You'd spend all your time in the gents handing out all sorts of other 'jobs'.
	You'd spend all your time in the gents handing out all sorts of other 'jobs'.(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:13, Reply)
 Bill Gates said he always assigned the most complicated tasks to the laziest engineers, as they'd find the easiest way of doing something.
	Bill Gates said he always assigned the most complicated tasks to the laziest engineers, as they'd find the easiest way of doing something.(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:30, Reply)
 I'd love to have a boss like you.
	I'd love to have a boss like you.If I left a packet of biscuits right at the back of my desk there's no way you'd be able to reach them to nick them.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:01, Reply)
 I'm prepared to withhold conjugal rights, if necessary, in order to get my own way.
	I'm prepared to withhold conjugal rights, if necessary, in order to get my own way.Alt: No thanks.
Altalt: Tory turns out to be a nasty piece of work? Well I'm surprised.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:06, Reply)
 Every boss I've worked for has ended up hating me after a couple of years.
	Every boss I've worked for has ended up hating me after a couple of years.So I guess all you B3tans are already my boss.
If only I cared.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:08, Reply)
 There's a really clever joke to be made here about your homicidal intentions towards ancient Roman scholars
	There's a really clever joke to be made here about your homicidal intentions towards ancient Roman scholarsbut I'm too stupid to make it
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:15, Reply)
 I have never used sex as a weapon
	I have never used sex as a weaponor ever even had any outside of a stable, long-term, committed relationship. The rest of you people disgust me.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:14, Reply)
 
	 KRONEY FUCKS HORSES
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:15, Reply)
 Never.
	Never.Having said that, I'm a shameless flirt and will happily use it to my advantage if I need to.
Alt: I wouldn't trust any of you spastics with anything work related.
AltAlt: he's a twat. Unfortunately, he has enough power and education to be really dangerous.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:18, Reply)
 Might work in reverse
	Might work in reverse"This not even slightly limited edition Geordi La Forge toy, removed from packaging with clear doggy bite marks, is a snip at just two million pounds and fifty pence"
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:22, Reply)
 seconded
	secondedhigh ceilings, triple aspect and flat roof equal cold flat
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:20, Reply)
 Extension with massive french windows is just as cold.
	Extension with massive french windows is just as cold.Still, we're going out to visit a friend in the hospital later. That should be fucking roasting.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:21, Reply)
 ?
	?she's got a bad kidney infection. I've been there, done that, had the morphine.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:23, Reply)
 I've heard sex is messy,
	I've heard sex is messy, and i don't relly like mess.
alt: I'd like b3th to be my boss, so I could put all my hours on in the morning, but not do any work and she's never notice because she's not out of bed till 4.
altalt: I didn't see the interview, how bad was it? I sort of feel it's a bit unfair to drag up stuff from his past that he's already been through at least twice, on his 2 succesful bids to be mayor of London.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:25, Reply)
 see, this makes no sense to me,
	see, this makes no sense to me, nothing is happening at 5am, there are no good films on, or pubs open, or stuff to go and do, it's dark and generally cold. If you're up and about by 9ish, you can do all sorts of stuff. I mean, sure, you can hang out with your mates at 5am, but if you do it at a normal time, you can also spontaneously fuck off to a pub, or pop down to the river and take a boat ride, or go to the cinema. everything good happens before about 2am these days. maybe 3 am if you've had a late start on the booze.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:31, Reply)
 What you're forgetting here
	What you're forgetting hereis that I have no friends. my friends all live on the computer and in the television.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:34, Reply)
 b3th is really a cat burglar
	b3th is really a cat burglar They based that film "Entrapment" all on her and the Sean Connery lookalike Mr B3th
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:36, Reply)
 It was pretty excruciating
	It was pretty excruciatingEddie Mair has a fantastically chilling delivery. I agree up to a point but Boris trades so heavily on his affable twat image that he can hardly complain when he gets his cage rattled.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:30, Reply)
 there;s only one fair cop in this crazy world, Sheriff John Burrnell
	there;s only one fair cop in this crazy world, Sheriff John Burrnell*WOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Bodyform, bodyfoprm for yoioooooooooooou*
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:35, Reply)
 well, he was put through the ringer by all and sundry both times he has stood for mayor,
	well, he was put through the ringer by all and sundry both times he has stood for mayor, from the article i read, both the big talking points were brought up back then, and still, the majority of londoners preferred him to the other candidates. He's done it now, lets focus on his behaviour since the election, not everything else.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:34, Reply)
 I think it's a bit unreasonable to hold politicians up to standards
	I think it's a bit unreasonable to hold politicians up to standardsthat we don't hold other people to. I bet that Mair bloke has said some unpleasant things on the phone, too. To insult somebody on the television is just out of order.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:30, Reply)
 I agree with that last point, what Boris says to his mates when no-one SHOULD be listening is nobody's business but his own
	I agree with that last point, what Boris says to his mates when no-one SHOULD be listening is nobody's business but his ownAs regards things like marital and professional honesty... I don't think a bit of integrity is too much to ask from our potential future PM. Winders makes a good point about that ground having been raked over before though.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:38, Reply)
 If you have to go back to 1990 to find something unpleasant
	If you have to go back to 1990 to find something unpleasantthat somebody else once asked from him, then that's probably not too bad, really.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:40, Reply)
 The more I think about this the more unreasonable his treatment is
	The more I think about this the more unreasonable his treatment isEspecially since, again now I think of it, the interviewer hardly touched on anything current.
Nonetheless, live by the sword of modern mass media...
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:44, Reply)
 flirting in court used to help, with old crusty judges, but these days half of them are wimmen
	flirting in court used to help, with old crusty judges, but these days half of them are wimmenbloody equality
alt: i get asked regularly about referrals for clients looking to employ people, or people with ideas that clients could back. i don't recommend cunts though.
altalt: boris would still get it.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:30, Reply)
 He cooks beef
	He cooks beefso she had to bin him immediately out of fear that he might actually be properly male.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:33, Reply)
 another great sig for badger....
	another great sig for badger....a FANTASTICALLY gay horse.
darth would be trying to mount you all day.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:51, Reply)
 Trying? Bitch please
	Trying? Bitch pleaseGay men love me, I can only assume this also applies to horses.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54, Reply)
 ask badger
	ask badgerbadge, would you let darth mount you, you rousing stallion of a man?
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:57, Reply)
 dull
	dullhave another one tonight, cousin of a different friend, but he has a kid. i'm not sure about that. nieces and nephews are bad enough.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:34, Reply)
 my trainee has been sneezing solidly since moving into this seat
	my trainee has been sneezing solidly since moving into this seatit drives me mental. utterly mental. there is no cold, and no allergies, so WHY THE FUCKING SNEEZING?
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:53, Reply)
 Because he's a fucking cunt and needs to be murdered.
	Because he's a fucking cunt and needs to be murdered.Preferably viciously.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:59, Reply)
 it's bizarre how something so apparently innocuous can be so fucking annoying
	it's bizarre how something so apparently innocuous can be so fucking annoying(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:00, Reply)
 I'm with you there.
	I'm with you there.They're kind of like religion. Like your own, if you have to, but don't parade it round me and expect me to like it too.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:40, Reply)
 no it doesn't
	no it doesn'tit means holidays having to be planned around school and money set aside for caring for it, and getting on really well with it until it gets to be about 13 and then yells that i'm not its real mum and can't tell it what to do... sigh.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:52, Reply)
 Not necessarily
	Not necessarily I have always gotten on really well with my step father. Mainly because he isn't a cunt
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54, Reply)
 Whoa whoa whoa! Thats a bit uncalled for!
	Whoa whoa whoa! Thats a bit uncalled for!I'll put it down to that firey temper your gingers have
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:55, Reply)
 woah, wait..
	woah, wait..is this you saying you WILL have his child? I'm no expert, but probably you should see how the first date goes, eh?
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:59, Reply)
 no
	noi'm saying if you choose to have crotchfruit, then you are choosing all this shit that comes with it. if you choose not to, then you don't want it by proxy!
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:01, Reply)
 it's true
	it's truelet's face it, if you didn't have kids, why would you ever choose to go on holiday during school holidays? twice as expensive and the pools are full of other people's spunkbubblets!
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:04, Reply)
 that is undeniably true.
	that is undeniably true.However since I've never had the slighest interest in going on holiday to places with other people there (with the possible exception of ski resorts, and even then..) then that doesn't worry me unduly.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:06, Reply)
 This
	ThisI have two darling hellspawn and I still wouldn't go on holiday either in the school holidays or anywhere where there will be kids. The exception being Disneyland which was for the kids not us. We went to Tunisia without them.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:09, Reply)
 I suspect that the only one of you that would be any good working for me is Poppet.
	I suspect that the only one of you that would be any good working for me is Poppet.And I'm not sure I trust her not to accidentally bring deathspiders across in her luggage.
I don't really "do" having bosses so that's a moot point.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:31, Reply)
 I'm quite low on vacancies for that.
	I'm quite low on vacancies for that.Got a scholarship PhD starting in sept if he's interested in the physical properties of cells undergoing epithelial-to-mesenchymal transition, though?
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:38, Reply)
 I'm not sure how well marketing works in my field
	I'm not sure how well marketing works in my fieldbut give it 10 years and it'll probably be necessary. Which is quite fucking depressing really.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:35, Reply)
 OG is in marketing.
	OG is in marketing.It strikes me as being mostly making things look pretty. Which, surely, is a pink job.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:38, Reply)
 It's convincing people they can't survive without something that they actually have no need for
	It's convincing people they can't survive without something that they actually have no need forMy brother's terrifying good at it.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:40, Reply)
 who's OG?
	who's OG?marketing is a broad church, my part involves A LOT of data and insight and evaluation and no very little pretty things. aside from me obvs
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:40, Reply)
 A lot of people get marketing and advertising mixed up.
	A lot of people get marketing and advertising mixed up.It's a lot more analytical than people think.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:41, Reply)
 OG mostly tarts up/brands properly the branches childlike efforts, from what I gather.
	OG mostly tarts up/brands properly the branches childlike efforts, from what I gather.Sounds bent and makes me believe marketers just play at colouring in all day.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:45, Reply)
 It's not really totally getting them "mixed up" though
	It's not really totally getting them "mixed up" thoughis it? because they blur into the same thing in the middle.
At the end of the day, it's the group of people that are concerned with convincing customers to buy things or services, just done in different ways.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:47, Reply)
 Marketing is identifying a need and fulfilling it.
	Marketing is identifying a need and fulfilling it.Advertising is trying to sell something that already exists.
Slightly different sides to the same coin, I guess.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:49, Reply)
 semantically, no.
	semantically, no.As 'marketing' isn't the same as 'taking something to market'.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:50, Reply)
 semantically, it's all a load of horseshit though, so that's not really that relevant.
	semantically, it's all a load of horseshit though, so that's not really that relevant.(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:51, Reply)
 Well, that's alright then.
	Well, that's alright then.Anyway, I'm no expert. That's Battered's field.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:52, Reply)
 neither am I
	neither am II just struggle to see there's any distinct divide if you need semantics to separate the two.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54, Reply)
 I could always write you a facebook app that'll warn you when your bunson burner gets too hot.
	I could always write you a facebook app that'll warn you when your bunson burner gets too hot.(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54, Reply)
 I'd be a fucking brilliant Ballroom dancing/useless quiz trivia Consultant
	I'd be a fucking brilliant Ballroom dancing/useless quiz trivia ConsultantEvery University needs one of those
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:39, Reply)
 You wouldn't even be in the bottom 50% of most pointless employees in the University if you took on that role
	You wouldn't even be in the bottom 50% of most pointless employees in the University if you took on that role(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:51, Reply)
 i know a few of those,
	i know a few of those, well, i have a few regulars that claim to be academics. They seem to drink an awful lot.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:47, Reply)
 A lot of them do.
	A lot of them do.It's a fairly fucking depressing line of work in many ways.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:49, Reply)
 I reckon I could do well by you as me boss.
	I reckon I could do well by you as me boss.You'd have to explain everything to me in metaphores so you can totally House up in the yard.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:49, Reply)
 I have never used sex as a weapon
	I have never used sex as a weaponbut I did once pretend to be religious to get a shag
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:42, Reply)
 I've not used sex as a weapon, but I've used a weapon for sex.
	I've not used sex as a weapon, but I've used a weapon for sex.May not be true
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:45, Reply)
 ESPN are going to start covering US Ultimate.
	ESPN are going to start covering US Ultimate.Probably on 'the Ocho' or something silly
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:03, Reply)
 sex is like spreading butter
	sex is like spreading butterpossible with a credit card, easier with a knife
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:49, Reply)
 1/100?
	1/100?it was shit but it wasn't that bad, don't beat yourself up too much, eh?
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:04, Reply)
 IT'S ALRIGHT EVERYONE
	IT'S ALRIGHT EVERYONEMY THREAD HAS HAD MORE REPLIES THAN NAKERS' ONE
WE CAN STOP PRETENDING IT WAS WORTH REPLYING TO AND START A NEW THREAD NOW
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:06, Reply)
 I've run out of fags, I know if I go out now then the TV delivery will turn up...
	I've run out of fags, I know if I go out now then the TV delivery will turn up...God i hate couriers.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:08, Reply)
 I think I might go for a cigarette right now. I've got a full pack.
	I think I might go for a cigarette right now. I've got a full pack. (, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:10, Reply)
 City link, and yes but only "it's on a van" not it'll be there at this time.
	City link, and yes but only "it's on a van" not it'll be there at this time.(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:13, Reply)
 It's ok, I have some chocolate cake and ice cream.
	It's ok, I have some chocolate cake and ice cream.The manliest way of dealing with this.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:16, Reply)
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