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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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That's enough pulling of teethMy new boss is in the office today. He's a gay. Middle management here I come! Ever used sex as a weapon? Ever flirted your way to the top? Ever HAD sex? Be honest.
Alt: Which b3tan would you most like to be your boss? Or your employee?
AltAlt: Boris Johnson eh, WORRALEGEND, hahahahahahahahahahaha
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 13:59, 191 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
I've had sex two timesBut it didn't take. Won't be trying it again.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:02,
Reply)
It's overrated.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:03,
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Make this moist, stick that in there, pump so-and-soI mean...who needs it?
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:06,
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I hate people that brownnose, or promote their friends.It was endemic in the massive insurer I worked for.
Alt- I'd genuinely like to work for Battered.
Alt alt- he's a prickster.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:02, Reply)
Worst job application ever.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:07,
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Does beating bears to death with your penis count as using sex as a weapon?if so, that.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:03,
Reply)
then that.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:07,
Reply)
Are you asking me permission to post something?This is quite a change in the existing dynamic
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:10, Reply)
I wouldn't employ any of you. I know how workshy you all are from the amount of time you spend pissing about online.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:06,
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you'd be lucky to have me as an employee, genuinely, I'm awesome(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:10,
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If I ever need someone to come to the office & lick all the windows I will let you know.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:16,
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but seriously I'm eminently employableyou'd be lucky to have me, tbh, I doubt you could afford me anyway
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:21,
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Oh come onYou'd give me a job in front of house staff cos I'm SO PRETTY
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:10, Reply)
You'd spend all your time in the gents handing out all sorts of other 'jobs'.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:13,
Reply)
Bill Gates said he always assigned the most complicated tasks to the laziest engineers, as they'd find the easiest way of doing something.(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:30, Reply)
I'd love to have a boss like you.If I left a packet of biscuits right at the back of my desk there's no way you'd be able to reach them to nick them.
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Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:01,
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I'm prepared to withhold conjugal rights, if necessary, in order to get my own way.Alt: No thanks.
Altalt: Tory turns out to be a nasty piece of work? Well I'm surprised.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:06,
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Every boss I've worked for has ended up hating me after a couple of years.So I guess all you B3tans are already my boss.
If only I cared.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:08,
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child I have stalked
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:10,
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Or alternativelydietitian I have talked to
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:12,
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There's a really clever joke to be made here about your homicidal intentions towards ancient Roman scholarsbut I'm too stupid to make it
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:15, Reply)
I have never used sex as a weaponor ever even had any outside of a stable, long-term, committed relationship. The rest of you people disgust me.
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Kroney, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:14,
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KRONEY FUCKS HORSES
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:15, Reply)
Only benders get hangovers.Real men keep drinking.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:24,
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Never.Having said that, I'm a shameless flirt and will happily use it to my advantage if I need to.
Alt: I wouldn't trust any of you spastics with anything work related.
AltAlt: he's a twat. Unfortunately, he has enough power and education to be really dangerous.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:18,
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don't let Monty put your prices ointo ebay(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:19,
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they'll work, and when it gets warm you can work in the garden(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:22,
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Might work in reverse"This not even slightly limited edition Geordi La Forge toy, removed from packaging with clear doggy bite marks, is a snip at just two million pounds and fifty pence"
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:22, Reply)
I wish I had a cuppa.I'm fucking freezing.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:19,
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secondedhigh ceilings, triple aspect and flat roof equal cold flat
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:20,
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Extension with massive french windows is just as cold.Still, we're going out to visit a friend in the hospital later. That should be fucking roasting.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:21,
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Even incurable pancreatic cancer has it's up sides \o/(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:22,
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?she's got a bad kidney infection. I've been there, done that, had the morphine.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:23,
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someone should punch it out of her, that'll sort it(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:24,
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I've heard sex is messy, and i don't relly like mess.
alt: I'd like b3th to be my boss, so I could put all my hours on in the morning, but not do any work and she's never notice because she's not out of bed till 4.
altalt: I didn't see the interview, how bad was it? I sort of feel it's a bit unfair to drag up stuff from his past that he's already been through at least twice, on his 2 succesful bids to be mayor of London.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:25,
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i love the morning, I feel funny being in bed all day.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:28,
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I'd rather be going to bed at 5am than getting up then.(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:28,
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what if Mr B3th's heart needs restarting in the wee hours?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:29,
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see, this makes no sense to me, nothing is happening at 5am, there are no good films on, or pubs open, or stuff to go and do, it's dark and generally cold. If you're up and about by 9ish, you can do all sorts of stuff. I mean, sure, you can hang out with your mates at 5am, but if you do it at a normal time, you can also spontaneously fuck off to a pub, or pop down to the river and take a boat ride, or go to the cinema. everything good happens before about 2am these days. maybe 3 am if you've had a late start on the booze.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:31,
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What you're forgetting hereis that I have no friends. my friends all live on the computer and in the television.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:34,
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so you're a vampire?(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:39,
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That would be pretty cool.Better than being a zombie, I suppose.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:42,
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b3th is really a cat burglar They based that film "Entrapment" all on her and the Sean Connery lookalike Mr B3th
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:36,
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It was pretty excruciatingEddie Mair has a fantastically chilling delivery. I agree up to a point but Boris trades so heavily on his affable twat image that he can hardly complain when he gets his cage rattled.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:30, Reply)
Hasn't he said it was a fair cop, or something?(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:32,
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there;s only one fair cop in this crazy world, Sheriff John Burrnell*WOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Bodyform, bodyfoprm for yoioooooooooooou*
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:35,
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well, he was put through the ringer by all and sundry both times he has stood for mayor, from the article i read, both the big talking points were brought up back then, and still, the majority of londoners preferred him to the other candidates. He's done it now, lets focus on his behaviour since the election, not everything else.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:34,
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I think it's a bit unreasonable to hold politicians up to standardsthat we don't hold other people to. I bet that Mair bloke has said some unpleasant things on the phone, too. To insult somebody on the television is just out of order.
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Kroney, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:30,
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I agree with that last point, what Boris says to his mates when no-one SHOULD be listening is nobody's business but his ownAs regards things like marital and professional honesty... I don't think a bit of integrity is too much to ask from our potential future PM. Winders makes a good point about that ground having been raked over before though.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:38, Reply)
If you have to go back to 1990 to find something unpleasantthat somebody else once asked from him, then that's probably not too bad, really.
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Kroney, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:40,
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The more I think about this the more unreasonable his treatment isEspecially since, again now I think of it, the interviewer hardly touched on anything current.
Nonetheless, live by the sword of modern mass media...
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:44, Reply)
flirting in court used to help, with old crusty judges, but these days half of them are wimmenbloody equality
alt: i get asked regularly about referrals for clients looking to employ people, or people with ideas that clients could back. i don't recommend cunts though.
altalt: boris would still get it.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:30,
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how was your date, or have we covered that already?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:31,
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He cooks beefso she had to bin him immediately out of fear that he might actually be properly male.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:33,
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haha. I'm liking this meme even if I missed it first time around.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:34,
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... and the horse you rode in on.darling.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:34,
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it was a FANTASTICALLY gay horse, though.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:36,
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another great sig for badger....a FANTASTICALLY gay horse.
darth would be trying to mount you all day.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:51,
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Trying? Bitch pleaseGay men love me, I can only assume this also applies to horses.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54, Reply)
ask badgerbadge, would you let darth mount you, you rousing stallion of a man?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:57,
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I'd go full dressage for him, baby.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:01,
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dullhave another one tonight, cousin of a different friend, but he has a kid. i'm not sure about that. nieces and nephews are bad enough.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:34,
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It saves you having to have one for him(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:36,
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which is relevant because?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:39,
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You hate everyone don't you?(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:43,
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my trainee has been sneezing solidly since moving into this seatit drives me mental. utterly mental. there is no cold, and no allergies, so WHY THE FUCKING SNEEZING?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:53,
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Because he's a fucking cunt and needs to be murdered.Preferably viciously.
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Kroney, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:59,
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it's bizarre how something so apparently innocuous can be so fucking annoying(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:00,
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Is it the dust from your disused mimsy?(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:17,
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I'm with you there.They're kind of like religion. Like your own, if you have to, but don't parade it round me and expect me to like it too.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:40,
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no it doesn'tit means holidays having to be planned around school and money set aside for caring for it, and getting on really well with it until it gets to be about 13 and then yells that i'm not its real mum and can't tell it what to do... sigh.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:52,
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Not necessarily I have always gotten on really well with my step father. Mainly because he isn't a cunt
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Peej, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54,
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maybe he isn'tbut you most certainly are :)
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54,
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Whoa whoa whoa! Thats a bit uncalled for!I'll put it down to that firey temper your gingers have
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Peej, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:55,
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woah, wait..is this you saying you WILL have his child? I'm no expert, but probably you should see how the first date goes, eh?
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:59,
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noi'm saying if you choose to have crotchfruit, then you are choosing all this shit that comes with it. if you choose not to, then you don't want it by proxy!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:01,
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yeah, yeah, denial is a river in Egypt etc(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:03,
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it's truelet's face it, if you didn't have kids, why would you ever choose to go on holiday during school holidays? twice as expensive and the pools are full of other people's spunkbubblets!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:04,
Reply)
that is undeniably true.However since I've never had the slighest interest in going on holiday to places with other people there (with the possible exception of ski resorts, and even then..) then that doesn't worry me unduly.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:06,
Reply)
ThisI have two darling hellspawn and I still wouldn't go on holiday either in the school holidays or anywhere where there will be kids. The exception being Disneyland which was for the kids not us. We went to Tunisia without them.
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Peej, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:09,
Reply)
I suspect that the only one of you that would be any good working for me is Poppet.And I'm not sure I trust her not to accidentally bring deathspiders across in her luggage.
I don't really "do" having bosses so that's a moot point.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:31,
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:((
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:31,
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I have to say I dunno what you do, so I can't really judge. Soz.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:32,
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Stay ABOUT from my Yorky bar(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:37,
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i missed the memo on this stay aboot thing(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:57,
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I'm quite low on vacancies for that.Got a scholarship PhD starting in sept if he's interested in the physical properties of cells undergoing epithelial-to-mesenchymal transition, though?
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:38,
Reply)
I'm not sure how well marketing works in my fieldbut give it 10 years and it'll probably be necessary. Which is quite fucking depressing really.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:35,
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OG is in marketing.It strikes me as being mostly making things look pretty. Which, surely, is a pink job.
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Kroney, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:38,
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It's convincing people they can't survive without something that they actually have no need forMy brother's terrifying good at it.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:40,
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who's OG?marketing is a broad church, my part involves A LOT of data and insight and evaluation and no very little pretty things. aside from me obvs
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:40,
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A lot of people get marketing and advertising mixed up.It's a lot more analytical than people think.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:41,
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OG mostly tarts up/brands properly the branches childlike efforts, from what I gather.Sounds bent and makes me believe marketers just play at colouring in all day.
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Kroney, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:45,
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I'd love to get a job colouring in.I'm ace at colouring in.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:50,
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Yeah, me too.But I still love colouring in.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:51,
Reply)
It's not really totally getting them "mixed up" thoughis it? because they blur into the same thing in the middle.
At the end of the day, it's the group of people that are concerned with convincing customers to buy things or services, just done in different ways.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:47,
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Marketing is identifying a need and fulfilling it.Advertising is trying to sell something that already exists.
Slightly different sides to the same coin, I guess.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:49,
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surely you can "market" a product that already exists?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:49,
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semantically, no.As 'marketing' isn't the same as 'taking something to market'.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:50,
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semantically, it's all a load of horseshit though, so that's not really that relevant.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:51,
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Well, that's alright then.Anyway, I'm no expert. That's Battered's field.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:52,
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neither am II just struggle to see there's any distinct divide if you need semantics to separate the two.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54,
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I could always write you a facebook app that'll warn you when your bunson burner gets too hot.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54,
Reply)
I'd be a fucking brilliant Ballroom dancing/useless quiz trivia ConsultantEvery University needs one of those
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:39, Reply)
You wouldn't even be in the bottom 50% of most pointless employees in the University if you took on that role(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:51,
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what do you do badger?(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:40,
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I'm an academic.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:41,
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He likes to keep abreast of whats happening(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54,
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i know a few of those, well, i have a few regulars that claim to be academics. They seem to drink an awful lot.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:47,
Reply)
A lot of them do.It's a fairly fucking depressing line of work in many ways.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:49,
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I reckon I could do well by you as me boss.You'd have to explain everything to me in metaphores so you can totally House up in the yard.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:49,
Reply)
I have never used sex as a weaponbut I did once pretend to be religious to get a shag
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Peej, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:42,
Reply)
tee hee(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:44,
Reply)
I've not used sex as a weapon, but I've used a weapon for sex.May not be true
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Frisbee OG wanker, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:45,
Reply)
alright Frisbee.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:47,
Reply)
all the better for seeing you old boy. Any stupid sports news?
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:56,
Reply)
ESPN are going to start covering US Ultimate.Probably on 'the Ocho' or something silly
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Frisbee OG wanker, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:03,
Reply)
sex is like spreading butterpossible with a credit card, easier with a knife
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:49,
Reply)
POTD.(you need to capitalise the F though)
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:52,
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I have not used a frisbee, yet.I fear it may not end well
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Frisbee OG wanker, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:54,
Reply)
(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 14:56,
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10(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:00,
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1/100?it was shit but it wasn't that bad, don't beat yourself up too much, eh?
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:04,
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Yeah ......but.......you........well......errrmmmmmmmmmmmCries
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:06,
Reply)
IT'S ALRIGHT EVERYONEMY THREAD HAS HAD MORE REPLIES THAN NAKERS' ONE
WE CAN STOP PRETENDING IT WAS WORTH REPLYING TO AND START A NEW THREAD NOW
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:06, Reply)
I've run out of fags, I know if I go out now then the TV delivery will turn up...God i hate couriers.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:08, Reply)
I think I might go for a cigarette right now. I've got a full pack. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:10,
Reply)
Who's is the courier? and do they not have trackers on them(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:11,
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Exactly(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:12,
Reply)
City link, and yes but only "it's on a van" not it'll be there at this time.(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:13, Reply)
Prioritise, man.What kind of an addict are you?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:15,
Reply)
It's ok, I have some chocolate cake and ice cream.The manliest way of dealing with this.
(, Mon 25 Mar 2013, 15:16, Reply)
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