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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I just did a bunny hop on a Segway over Steve Jobs' rotten corpse

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:12, 154 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
iLie

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:13, Reply)
Why would google have Steve Jobs' corpse
THINK Boyce, THINK
See me after class, you can think about what you've done then
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:16, Reply)
Steve Jobs = obsessive lunatic

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:17, Reply)
android are slaying apple and have been gloating

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:17, Reply)
FINE your detention is cancelled

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:18, Reply)
the fake grass seats have signs on them.
signs which say 'keep ON the grass'! They're just turning traditional thinking upside down! The utter, utter benders.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:16, Reply)
Are you working in some sort of hipster commune today?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:17, Reply)
yes

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:19, Reply)
THANKS FOR THE EXPOSITION

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:26, Reply)
YOU SHOULD SMOKE SOME GRASS
TAKE THAT, SOCIETY!
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:17, Reply)
Waqqi bastards.
Are you imagineering solutions to problems?
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:19, Reply)
He's attending the "How To Use Amazon For Dummies" starter class

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:20, Reply)
roffle

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:22, Reply)
Let's hope they don't ask him the difference between what he has in stock and the price!

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:22, Reply)
No, thats on the difficult exam at the end of the day
Before they get their party bags and jelly
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:23, Reply)
I was insentivised towards an outrageous new paradigm
I flew it up a flag pole, a few users saluted it, so we blue skied the whole deal! Long story short, we were back in Zurich in time for croissants and mochaccino!
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:21, Reply)
Mr Boyce please head upstairs to meeting room 1B
BUT WAIT the meeting room is on the ROOF and it's outside!
A man in a suit and shorts says 'Welcome, to the dreamatorium'
The table is made of jelly
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:20, Reply)
I like this

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:21, Reply)
I'd like to work there
or at least, have a birthday party there. Although, I said the same thing about McDonalds.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:22, Reply)
wow are you here too?
come and say hello. I'm in the segway room
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Sorry man can't stop to chat
Wacky Greg has some ideas he wants to run past me, about putting a search engine in a roaming robotic cow, that stops at street corners to moo the top searches in that postcode at passing cars
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:27, Reply)
I@M IN!

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Shut it Patpepetaptaptpepaptptitis

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:36, Reply)
Really?
Because if you say you did, I'll believe you.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:17, Reply)
I totes did

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:18, Reply)
Monty = My new hero

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:20, Reply)
Steve Jobs didn't work for Google.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:20, Reply)
Oh for god's sake

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:22, Reply)
He worked for apple, and pixar
NOT google
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:23, Reply)

apple, and pixar One Stop
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Have you read his biography?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:24, Reply)
NO
any cursory read of a newspaper or light reading magazine article will have revealed his working background
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:25, Reply)
He truly was a nutter
Refused treatment for his cancer in favour of eating vegetables until it had spread through his entire body.

Used to only eat apples for a week

Shit like that
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Fair point on the aversion to medical input on a treatable cancer until it was too late.
The rest of his life was more 'driven'. Beats being sat on his arse as a drone in an accounts office or whatevs
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:29, Reply)
To the point of excluding his family most of the time

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:34, Reply)
Is it inspiring?
Will it make me hate liver too?
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:26, Reply)
No, just weird
He was basically a 3 year old kid running a company. Used to scream and shout at people then burst into tears. Wouldn't eat properly.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:28, Reply)
He looked like a bit of a cunt.
I am not normally wrong about these things.

People like that, with that much power and influence, often need a punch in the head. Just to remind them they are physical beings and that you can fuck their shit up at will.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:31, Reply)
I think this may have helped

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:33, Reply)
It was the polo neck sweaters that did it for me.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:39, Reply)
Not enough cardigan, eh?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:42, Reply)
Didn't he disown his daughter, tell everyone he was sterile for years, then finally say 'lol no actually she's mine'

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:36, Reply)
Pretty much, yes

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:37, Reply)
I like his style

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:38, Reply)
Why are you pretending to be in the Google offices today Boyce?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:23, Reply)
I'm at a Google conference

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:25, Reply)
A "goonference"?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:25, Reply)
OYAH MY LUG 'OLE!

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Ying tong ying tong Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:29, Reply)
Exactly

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:29, Reply)
Watch you don't fall in the water

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:30, Reply)
I bet you're fucking loving it.
They better have good wifi connections in their offices.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:26, Reply)
Amanda Thatcher is not too bad looking.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:21, Reply)
Are you fucking kidding me?!
She looks like ANDREW MARR
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:22, Reply)
I dunno.
She's just made "the list".
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:25, Reply)
Evangelical Christian as well.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:26, Reply)
They are fucking FILTH.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Therefore is filthy?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:28, Reply)
Of course she has, she's female.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:43, Reply)
Are you on a lot of Acid right now?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:25, Reply)
Alright, bender?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Morning you lanky bastard

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:55, Reply)
NO :o(

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:29, Reply)
Not a lot, no

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:33, Reply)
just a normal working amount

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:36, Reply)
Are you at a job interview at Tangles' place or some shit?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:34, Reply)
Ask them if the office runs slower
After they've had the glaziers in.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:36, Reply)
Depends if they have chrome frames.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:46, Reply)
^tech jokes

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:52, Reply)
I see no jokes

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:00, Reply)
You need to be able to see hidden jokes

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:06, Reply)
I've been to "Innocent Towers" which is similarly wacky
got lots of free smoothies though
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:40, Reply)
I like Innocents packaging
It is actually interesting to read
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:42, Reply)
Northerners literature here ; )

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:43, Reply)
lol

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)
Innocent Towers....
Current occupants, Bartleby, Stuart Hall and Kevin Webster.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:13, Reply)
Has anyone heard from Frank today?
After the relentless bulling yesterday Iā€™m worried about him
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:47, Reply)
Momo is currently picking away at his distended anus that pink socked out when he hanged himself

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)
Excellent imagery

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:49, Reply)
That is not a nice image to promote this close to lunch

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:49, Reply)
Why? Were you planning on eating distended anus today?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
nom

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:52, Reply)
Someone pulled *his* pork, and no mistake!

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:52, Reply)
B3th please ewwwwwwwwwww
*reaches for the mindbleach*
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:53, Reply)
No McDonalds for HH

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:54, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:55, Reply)
A "chicken McSphincter"

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:57, Reply)
With anal rings

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:57, Reply)
and a muck flurry

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:59, Reply)
80

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:58, Reply)
80 chicken McSphincters for Harters.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:59, Reply)
With goatse cheese

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:01, Reply)
ARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :(

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:04, Reply)
2 girls served him but he only got 1 cup

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:11, Reply)
MAKEITSTOP MAKEITSTOP MAKEITSTOP

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:15, Reply)
IMAGE MARRS!!!!!!!!!

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:50, Reply)
Ha ha. Yeah. Check he's still alive. Ha ha yeah.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:49, Reply)
check em

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
we have a laugh round here don't we

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:57, Reply)
I hope you had an iWank in their wacky bogs

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)
I had a wank into you mum's eyes if that helps

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:49, Reply)
I just repaired my vacuum cleaner.
I am a GOD in this house right now.

Except that I can't destroy worlds; just edit ones that already exist.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:49, Reply)
was it clogged with chicken bones?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:49, Reply)
Why would it be clogged with chicken bones?
You really are a bent spastic.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:50, Reply)
because in some kinky geriatric Weston sex game you shoved the nozzle up a chicken's poop chute and sucked out it's skeleton

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
That would SHIRLEY have to be a horse

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
I also repaired my vacuum cleaner last weekend
*highfives*
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:50, Reply)
We should totally get together and talk about manly DIY type stuff.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:50, Reply)
I'm reading this as "soapy titwank"

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
That sucks
tee hee
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
groan
Why did I laugh at this?
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:52, Reply)
Because you're still thinking about soapy titwanks.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:53, Reply)
Always

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:54, Reply)
Because.....I put it to you.....
That you sir, are easily impressed.



*rests case*
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:54, Reply)
I hoover up shit like this

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:55, Reply)
You're Dyson with death
with gags like that
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:56, Reply)
cyclols

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:56, Reply)
You can't argue with the vax.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:57, Reply)
Henry MOAR gags like this
and I'll report you the B3th when she wakes up
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:59, Reply)
haha all you had to do was to put 50p into the lecy meter !!

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
Oh, Rory.
I've missed YOU most of all.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:52, Reply)
chicks dig my sartorial elegance babygirl

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:52, Reply)
Oh cool, are we bullying Dozer next?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:56, Reply)
i don't see why not

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:58, Reply)
Count me in

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:58, Reply)
it probably needs a thread all of its own

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:00, Reply)
I think it will backfire on us
And he would only revel in the fact that his name is being mentioned


Best we all just put him on 2.0
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:03, Reply)
I dunno if our vacuum cleaner works, the Irish woman who cleans for us is the only one who uses it
She's not complained though so it's probably fine
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:57, Reply)
Mine was clogged up with bits of plaster and piping

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:58, Reply)
Did you murder the Venus de Milo?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:03, Reply)
he gave her polonium 210
administered, wait for it, wait for it ... intravenusly
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:09, Reply)
GRONE
we do have a laugh here
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:11, Reply)
Hahaha yeah.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:11, Reply)
hahahahaha yeah hahahahaha

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:12, Reply)
Yes

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:10, Reply)
That poor, 'armless statue...

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:10, Reply)
haha, we have a right laugh here don't we

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:12, Reply)
Women am puttee in his hands.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:14, Reply)
haha, we have a right laugh here don't we

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:55, Reply)
\o/
WE DO NOW
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:55, Reply)
check em

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:56, Reply)
how is your anus?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:56, Reply)
Franky.....do you remember me

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 11:57, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTXKkq_Bwhc
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:06, Reply)
WTF

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:11, Reply)

i.imgur.com/20RrPlZ.png
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:12, Reply)
he looks like someone i met from here once
except slightly hotter
(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:14, Reply)
ARGH!

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:15, Reply)
STEVE JOBS IS NOT GOOGLES

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:02, Reply)
I for one am glad you have cleared that one up Gluey

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:03, Reply)
erm what

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:04, Reply)
GOD Y U KNO NOTHIN?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:18, Reply)
YES HE CUNTING WELL IS

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:07, Reply)
i just did a new thread

(, Wed 17 Apr 2013, 12:13, Reply)

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