Reading that last thread it occurred to me that I have barely picked up a guitar in fucking months
This made me feel rather sad.

What do you enjoy, that you've not done for ages? MY MUM AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA shut up

One thing I am doing a lot more of (IS YOUR MUM AHAHAHAHAHAHAH shut up) is drawing. I'm really not bad at all at it but prior to having time with my kid I barely did any post-school, apart from rubbish graffiti outlines.

Alt: what have you got into recently, either for the first time or for the first time in a while? MY MUM AHAHAHAHAH REALLY IT'S HILARIOUS AHAAHAHA shut up
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:42, 149 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

YMs
To all answers
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:45, Reply)

*sigh*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:45, Reply)

125/4

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:45, Reply)

woah, you've got a kid?

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:45, Reply)

well, kind of
Assuming by 'kid' you mean 'massive penis'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:46, Reply)

no, i mean child that you have made with your massive penis

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:50, Reply)

Put it this way, I've had no complaints!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:52, Reply)

No they all go straight to the Old Bill

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:53, Reply)

that doesn't really answer my question

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:53, Reply)

I have a 5yr old daughter.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:54, Reply)

IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:54, Reply)

like a five year old daughter holding an apple?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:03, Reply)

DO I?!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:08, Reply)

well its nearly a full grown goat but still

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:47, Reply)

Alt: wanking.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:46, Reply)

Go on I will offer a reply
Slight gay, but I used to really enjoy singing and I haven't done so for many years I would love to do choral stuff again but it normally involves church folk and they fuck me off.

I am fucking shit at drawing though, my head and hand don't seem to be connected

Alt Gardening, for the first time I have a house with a garden and so far I have built a patio and am slowly getting the lawn sorted, It is a surprising pleasure to potter with the plants
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:46, Reply)

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Church singing!!!!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:47, Reply)

Shhhhh its only so I can entice a vicar to touch me

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:48, Reply)

CHURCH SINGING CHURCH SINGING CHURCH SINGING

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:49, Reply)

watcha gonna do?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:49, Reply)

Kick 'is fackin nuts off

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:50, Reply)

watcha gonna do when the vicar gropes you?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:50, Reply)

Bongle

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:51, Reply)

bad boys bad boys, watcha gonna do, take out my cock and stab your poo!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:53, Reply)

Ha ha

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:54, Reply)

hahaah you said poo!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:54, Reply)

Have beers with HimJim been confirmed for this week?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:55, Reply)

They have not.
I cannae do Thurs.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:56, Reply)

I can't do Wednesday.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:56, Reply)

I can't do.....YOUR MUM AHAHAHA YOUR MUM GEDDIT

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:57, Reply)

There are never enough YM 'jokes' on /OT.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:59, Reply)

How about tonight?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:12, Reply)

I am too fucked to do tonight Lighty, soz mate

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:14, Reply)

Which leaves tuesday or friday

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:16, Reply)

I could do either

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:17, Reply)

+YM or YD

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:18, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2022887
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:20, Reply)

i had suggested friday to lusty
she was waiting for her work rota
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:28, Reply)

I think she's off Fri - I think.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:39, Reply)

i had a plan
i text you...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:50, Reply)

Alt: Grow stuff you can eat. It's really good eating your own veg. oooer.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:48, Reply)

The power of yoga.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:49, Reply)

Frankie goes to hollywood's zzzz........

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:51, Reply)

Doing an 'Erb garden

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:50, Reply)

rosemary grows like a weed so start small on that.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:51, Reply)

And mint spreads like YM's herpes.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:52, Reply)

GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY. GAY.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:50, Reply)

I read this in the style of 'Mel and Kim'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:05, Reply)

I can take or leave this post

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:09, Reply)

"You ain't never gonna be bumsexable"

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:11, Reply)

Soprano yeah?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:51, Reply)

Baritone to bass ASHERLEY
I have a mans voice, I aint no squeaker
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:52, Reply)

yeah whatever castrato

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:54, Reply)

My beardless face is so pretty

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:59, Reply)

i've not been on holiday in ages

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:52, Reply)

You won't want to hear about my upcoming 3 week holiday in California then.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:54, Reply)

not even a little bit

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:55, Reply)

Been not doing much photography or photo-manipulation.
But I'm going to the states for a couple of weeks soon, including Monument Valley, so I'm looking forward to getting back into it.

Also: SP YM
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:55, Reply)

SP
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:56, Reply)

I try to ensure that I do the things I enjoy regularly.
I find it really helps to break up the tedious cycle of work/sleep/work.

The one thing I really struggle to find the time to do anymore is: nothing.
In the days before I had kids I could easily spend an entire weekend doing absolutely fuck all.
I kind of miss it occasionally.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:58, Reply)

nothing would be lovely

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:59, Reply)

I like to look at maps and talk about how hip hop changed the world and stuff.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:02, Reply)

You sound well cool
What are your views on trainers
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:03, Reply)

I consider trainers to be important.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:03, Reply)

Very Important.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:04, Reply)

I'm grinning like a mong on nitrous at this
for no appaarent reason
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:13, Reply)

It's because of all the nitrous

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:14, Reply)

apaaaaaaarently not

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:17, Reply)

There is a great map shop on the Fulham road

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:05, Reply)

That is in a part of London that I don't think is as good as another part of London.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:08, Reply)

well it is fulham, so full of tossers

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:11, Reply)

some very nice pubs in fulham

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:27, Reply)

I nearly bought a fucking massive world map at the weekend
but it was £100
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:10, Reply)

You sound like a right prick, no offence

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:07, Reply)

YD.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:03, Reply)

whoah there - an unexpected development here!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:06, Reply)

I didn't fancy sloppy fifty-seconds :(

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:10, Reply)

He's not in my top ten "attractive rappers" list

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:12, Reply)

"Making Fiddy sloppy" was probably Byrne's career low point.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:26, Reply)

I rarely pick up my guitar but I am meeting a mate tonight to discuss
GETTING THE BAND BACK TOGETHER!
( Peej, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:06, Reply)

i have seen a picture of your singing in your band
you had an eyebrow piercing leading me to believe that you exclusively played covers of popular boyband F5ve
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:10, Reply)

I have two and a lip piercing. I do not know any f5ve songs though, sorry

( Peej, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:21, Reply)

slam dunk the funk?
Get on Up?

These are classics PJ!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:23, Reply)

I have googled f5ve and am getting some rapper

( Peej, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:26, Reply)

He means 5ive

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:29, Reply)

turns out it is "spelt" 5ive

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:29, Reply)

yurk prick

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:30, Reply)

They look shit

( Peej, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:32, Reply)

how many top ten singles have your band had?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:38, Reply)

7

( Peej, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 15:14, Reply)

THERE AIN'T NO PARTY LIKE AN S-CLUB PARTY

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 15:16, Reply)

I see the logic here
She used to suck my cock when I played in a band, maybe if the band gets back together she'll suck it again...?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:11, Reply)

Textbook

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:12, Reply)

he should probably have a wash as well

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:14, Reply)

Nah, its reached the point where I am thinking "what will get me out of the house for a couple of evenings a week?"

( Peej, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:21, Reply)

I hear ya, brother.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:24, Reply)

two more /OT marriages in the fast lane to divorce-ville : (

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:25, Reply)

Don't be daft.
I can't afford a divorce
( Peej, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:26, Reply)

I would never be so lucky

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:30, Reply)

OK Kylie

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:30, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2023006
I You
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:31, Reply)

Well, for cvarious reasons I've hardly cycled this year.
I'm having a stabb at getting back into it as it's good fome in many ways.

Alt: Making/modifying airfix kits, with a steampunk flavour, obviously.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:08, Reply)

*drinky hand gesture*

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:09, Reply)

drinky lithiumy
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:14, Reply)

Just found this:
On www.guardian.co.uk you can click "republican?" near the top and all the royal baby stories disappear.

\o/
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:11, Reply)

I've been seeing screengrabs of that on facebook all morning.
I didn't realise it was a real thing.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:13, Reply)

Oh yeah, Facebook is real alright.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:14, Reply)

That led me to this
www.guardian.co.uk/society/2013/jul/22/domestic-violence-boyfriend-jailed-campaigner
"Tina Nash – who had her eyes gouged out by her previous partner – was assaulted by Roland Alli in front of her child"

There comes a point where you have to point out the common denominator in someone's failed relationships.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:18, Reply)

£10 says she's really fucking annoying

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:19, Reply)

Yeah right
£10
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:29, Reply)

I actually changed my comment from that
Genuinely changed "Christ, she must be really fucking annoying" to "there comes a point..." because I thought it was a bit harsh.

Great minds, Monts, great minds.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:54, Reply)

true, 'victims' of domestic violence nearly always bring it on themselves

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:20, Reply)

Its nearly always the kids fault.
The parents were fine till the little brat came along.
( Peej, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:25, Reply)

That was near me. It was pretty vicious
He kept strangling her and the resuscitating her so he could do it again. How he didn't get done for attempted murder I can't work out.
( Peej, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:24, Reply)

Which in turn led me to this:
www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2013/jul/18/ballet-porn-tamara-rojo-headlines-women

I didn't read it, but I can't help thinking that if ballet was like porn I'd probably watch a lot more of it.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:27, Reply)

That lead me to read this:
www.guardian.co.uk/books/2013/jul/22/girl-least-liz-jones-digested
Is Swipe Liz Jones?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:47, Reply)

Yes.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:48, Reply)

well, that's that sorted then.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:48, Reply)

liz jones: best. troll. ever.
only an idiot would believe she means what she-

yep. proving my point here ^^
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:48, Reply)

that artticle comprises probably 70% of all I know about her.
it just sounded eerily familiar, true (of her) or not.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:52, Reply)

you're a funny one
you sound like you should be all intense and have good ideas. but... sadly it's all fart and no poo.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 15:03, Reply)

SQUASH
blah blah my new racquets are staring at me most reproachfully, how can it be this hard to find a court, blah blah.

you should take her to a kids/parents art class. then she can enjoy herself and you can piss on all the other kids' artwork.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:15, Reply)

I read this in the style of Queen's Flash Gordon theme

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:20, Reply)

hahaha

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:20, Reply)

oh fuck
now i can't stop singing that
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:26, Reply)

EARWORM EVERY ONE OF US!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:28, Reply)

Afternoon hippy.
Sort of an answer to alt, thinking of doing a part-time law degree. It's only 2 evenings a week, over 4 years, apparently Manchester Met's a good place for it. Not for job shit, or anything like that, just for pleasure. Recent college course gave me a kick up the arse re education.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:31, Reply)

of course, fuck getting a job

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:33, Reply)

Blimey you're up early today B3th.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:36, Reply)

probably pound a pint day at the union

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:37, Reply)

believe me
there is nothing pleasurable about studying law. you don't learn the interesting bits.

try philosophy or psychology or english or art if you want something fun but meaningless...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:40, Reply)

i think bear pookie has enough meaninglessness in his life already

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:40, Reply)

Driving for fun, it's been just commuting for years.
However, I shall be driving to St Ives at the weekend and then to Scotland in the first bit of September. Then around Easter next year, I'm going to drive to Florence.
( Kroney, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:44, Reply)

but in what!?!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:45, Reply)

That's why there's been so much umming and ahing.
I want a good one!
( Kroney, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:46, Reply)

if you want one that will drive thousands of miles without dying on you
you might want a new one
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:49, Reply)

or an old one, that is simple enough to fix by the raodside

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:51, Reply)

You're like one of those chimp toys with a pair of cymbals.
I don't like new cars, I never have.
( Kroney, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:55, Reply)

so would you have liked the old cars you like now, when they were new?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)

Impossible to say, really.
I liked the Audi coupe that the S2 is based on when it was new-ish.
( Kroney, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:57, Reply)

Nice one, take my word for it make sure you are on the A30 by 8.30am
so that you are in St. Ives by 10-10.30 the traffic starts backing up like a bastard a bit later and most people leave their accommodation at 10am which creates a bit of traffic.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:54, Reply)

We'll be leaving Uxbridge by 6am at the latest, I've no intention of sitting in avoidable traffic.

( Kroney, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:55, Reply)

are you going on some sort of retreat?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:55, Reply)

Weekend by the sea.

( Kroney, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:57, Reply)

Is that near Southend?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 15:00, Reply)

hahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 17:48, Reply)

I made that mistake once and sat on the A30 for three hours it was only about 8 miles to St Ives

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 15:16, Reply)

AA levels of cool story here.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 15:18, Reply)

Thanks TuiB coming from you that means a lot

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 22 Jul 2013, 15:19, Reply)