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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Fucking hell you're all even more shit than usual today.
I didn't think that was possible.

It's micro's 2nd birthday today. I'm not sure she'll remember it when she's older.

What's your earliest memory?
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:17, 92 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
fucking your mum up the arse

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:18, Reply)
I fucking love this site sometimes

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:29, Reply)
my brother "falling" out of the upstairs window

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:23, Reply)
Damn those Birmingham towerblocks with their faulty hinges.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:23, Reply)
OK "Lighty" Clapton

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:28, Reply)
My most vivid memory was going to a seafood restaurant in Cyprus, being ordered some fish or other, and crying when it appeared with a head and tail.
My knowledge of fish was probably limited to that of the finger variety.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:24, Reply)
+ I was 27 at the time.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:30, Reply)
About two or three I suppose.
I can remember shit from years ago well enough, but my short-term memories pretty bollocksed.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:33, Reply)
I can remember shit from years ago well enough, but my short-term memories pretty bollocksed.
Oh, wait.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:41, Reply)
About 5 minutes ago.

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:24, Reply)
What happened?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:25, Reply)
A highly intensive training session on language and computer use.

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:26, Reply)
One to tell the grandchildren there.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:27, Reply)
I was about 2 and living in Washington
I planted some apple seeds. They didn't grow
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:30, Reply)
FRUIT WOES

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:30, Reply)
I assume you then cut down a tree and didnt lie to your Pappy

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:53, Reply)
I thought this was clever

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:01, Reply)
A Man in a shellsuit, a big cigar and a medal at the end after a hefty fingering

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:31, Reply)
Jim'll Gay It

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:34, Reply)
Jim'll fist it

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:42, Reply)
Soz, I've been actually working today, sort of
on account of leaving early tomorrow and having the rest of the week off.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:32, Reply)
*bats eyelid*

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:37, Reply)
I say "working"
I've recently got addicted to Cndy Crush Saga like a girl.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:38, Reply)
Yeah Im on 245 or something stupid.
It gets nothing short of horrendous when you are stuck for weeks.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:43, Reply)
As soon as I get stuck on any games I just stop playing them
High end gaming would be pretty expensive me seeing as I'd only ever end up playing the first 4 levels for every game I bought
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:47, Reply)
Not to mention the hundreds spent on cosplay

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:52, Reply)
29 :((((

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:07, Reply)
This is a good thing, computer game scores are nothing to brag about

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:14, Reply)
Probably something from school I reckon, so I would have been 4 or 5

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:41, Reply)
Being buggered in the showers no doubt.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:51, Reply)
Nah, your dad didn't teach at my school

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:54, Reply)
My dads a teacher and he said he had you, and you were crap*
*he didn't really, I haven't spoken to him in years LOL
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:31, Reply)
I was scared and inexperienced : (

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:38, Reply)
Not now though, you damn dirty ape.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:41, Reply)
Haha lols

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:42, Reply)
I used to be*
Such a day dreamer that a few years back when the old dear was still breathing I recounted a tale of a family holiday that had never happened and existed solely in my head.





*may well still be
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:55, Reply)
You prolly should have waited for her to die. I mean why torture a sick old lady?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:58, Reply)
I know but fuck her

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 16:59, Reply)
I did
She was rubbish
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:02, Reply)
So are you going to post a picture of the cake you made?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:05, Reply)
There's one on FB, but it's got our faces in it.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:14, Reply)
I've seen your face, nothing to fear here

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:15, Reply)
I've seen yours as well. Your parents should be kicked to death.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:16, Reply)
Because I'm so sexy no one else has a chance yeah?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:18, Reply)
I have to say it was a novelty to be at a birthday party where all the mothers are glaring at you for being 'that bastard. Yeah that's him. She's well shut of him. The shit'.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:25, Reply)
Good times
She's told them all you have a small willy btw
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:28, Reply)
And probably a load of other lies as well.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:30, Reply)
Hahaha check em "lies"

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:35, Reply)
I hope he made the golly wog one

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:15, Reply)
My earliest memory.......
Is of treading on some toast and marmalade, I could only have been one or two, and my grandad standing me in the sink to wash my feet.
He's dead now LOL
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:29, Reply)

wash my feet

suck my cock
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:34, Reply)
I believe the correct thing to say here is
YOU NINJA CUNT

Amirite?
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:36, Reply)
Just cunt will do

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:36, Reply)
I thought that was a given.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:37, Reply)
Nah batterd is a taker

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:38, Reply)
How do you know? GAYER! GAYER!

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:39, Reply)
Euston station public bogs says so, why do you think he has 11k twitter followers?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:41, Reply)
I would imagine
10,999 are 'local sluts in your area' and the other one is you.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:43, Reply)
I'm not on twitter, cos its for cunts innit

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:44, Reply)
'Twatter' more like.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:46, Reply)
That it is. That why I assumed you were on there.
Posting pictures of your dinner and telling your 'friends' how bored you are.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:49, Reply)
You want Doctor Frogs grandad to suck your cock?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:02, Reply)
And he's dead. Terrible oral/necro type stuff.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:08, Reply)
I don't know entirely sure how that would work, how long dead is he? Would the maggots create a good texture in lew of bodily tissues?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:12, Reply)
I would guess about 25 years.
But if he wants to dig him up and skull fuck the long dead old bastard, that's his prerogative.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:19, Reply)

He just misunderstands what a boner's all about.
(Phudbree oh man, the Doric Yorick, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:23, Reply)
Skullolz

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:24, Reply)
You say that now, but you'd change your mind once the shovels come out.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:23, Reply)
Dunno where he's buried anyway. But good luck in the treasure hint.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:25, Reply)

Any grave in a storm.
(Phudbree oh man, the Doric Yorick, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:26, Reply)
Falling down the stairs when I was 2, probably.
I have recollections of doing a full cartwheel, smacking my head off the stair and splitting my head and nose open. Fun times.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:39, Reply)
Was it straight after this that you decided that you liked dr who?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:40, Reply)
I can't remember to be honest.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:41, Reply)
It seems plausible

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:43, Reply)
You parents were terribly disappointed that you survived.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:40, Reply)
I think they were,
they took me to a bowling alley a couple of years later where I proceeded to trip on a step and split my head open again. Coincidence????
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:42, Reply)
Hard to say. I will look into the case file.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:43, Reply)
Ooh, I remember sledging down the stairs on the toybox lid
and on arriving at the bottom at considerable speed being catapulted into the wall opposite with some force.

Good times.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 17:53, Reply)
Did you get £250 off You've Been Framed?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:09, Reply)

I did almost exactly the same. Ended up winded for the first time in my life and was convinced I was dying. My mother laughed and stepped over me.

But there are no mental health issues as a result. Probably.
(Phudbree oh man, the Doric Yorick, Tue 27 Aug 2013, 18:21, Reply)

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