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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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come on losers
let's get you talking about food. the government is going to ban consumption of one meat (or type of lentils for tangles). which should it be?

alt: are you a goody-goody or a wild-child? how do you rebel?

altalt: i have a cold, some fresh orange juice, some raw nuts and a file on my desk. what do you have?
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:17, 162 replies, latest was 11 years ago)


(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:18, Reply)
HAhahahahahahahaha!

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:18, Reply)
Splendid.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:19, Reply)
how long have you been waiting to use that?!
twunt
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:19, Reply)
Found it this morning, so maybe an hour?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:57, Reply)
click!

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:22, Reply)
It's a bit early for POTD
but fuck it.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:33, Reply)
They should ban halal meat #topical #edgy
alt: I'm having a kebab tonight.
altalt: A pile of May invoices to 'post and verify', a coke zero and a sore aching feet.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:19, Reply)
a chicken one

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:20, Reply)
No, I had Chicken Monday and yesterday

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:21, Reply)
ok falafel then

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:22, Reply)
I'm not eating that muck.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:23, Reply)
Theres a place here that charges £4.50 for a falafel in pitta with salad
Its fucking chickpeas and veg, theres no meat in it, it should be about a quid!
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:37, Reply)
#ripoffbritain

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:38, Reply)
I wouldn't even buy it for a quid.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:42, Reply)
If I had a falafel I'd throw it hard at a foodwrongs head.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:54, Reply)
Pete Seeger's early draft of lyrics was a little angrier than the finished version

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:59, Reply)
Fuck That.
The only butchers open when I'm awake or not in work are the Halal butchers.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:22, Reply)
***MUSLIM ALERT MUSLIM ALERT***

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:24, Reply)
A halal kebab?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:24, Reply)
No a proper Engerlish kebab mate

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:27, Reply)
Large mixed with halep sauce.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:29, Reply)
I'm thinking lamb spare ribs tonight

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:30, Reply)
I accidentally managed to ask for pork in a halal butchers last week.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:38, Reply)
Bit daft, but why should you be made to feel bad for asking for something most butchers sell?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:43, Reply)
Precisely. Particularly they didn't have the fact that they were halal advertised
and were about two doors down from a butcher who was marked as halal.

Still - got my pork from another butcher though - 2lb shoulder - fucking lush, it were. Had it with dauphinoise potatoes.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:49, Reply)
bushmeat
I have a second hand cat.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:21, Reply)
has it eaten the hamster yet?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:21, Reply)
no
She's not arsed about hunting. Too old.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:22, Reply)
something about wizened old pussy

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:23, Reply)
you'd know

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:24, Reply)
you wouldn't
^ hasn't had sex since 2003 ^
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:25, Reply)
^hasn't had good sex since EVER^

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:36, Reply)
not true
YM was excellent
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:39, Reply)
My mum says your cock is small bent and ugly and you don't know what to do with it.
She reckons that's why you got a BMW.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:01, Reply)
A black man's willy?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:01, Reply)
i don't even own an bmw

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:05, Reply)
Thats because your daddy buys you everything

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:06, Reply)
i wish this meme were true
i wish it hard
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:08, Reply)
You have a cold on your desk?
Use a tissue you dirty cow.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:21, Reply)
I have a coffee and painkillers.
Just need a cigarette for the full set.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:22, Reply)
Can we count fish as meat?
Salmon. It's a shitty overrated fish.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:23, Reply)
I agree
except on sushi.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:25, Reply)
Fuck off food wrong
alt. both
altalt. I have 4 macbook pros, a macbook mini, two ipads, a nexus 7, loads of usb drives and external hard drives, a copy of Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail, a cup of black unsweetened coffee and a Lenovo x100e laptop on my desk. I do not have a cold.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:24, Reply)
I don't have anything outstanding on my desk
as I do my job properly and promptly.

Typical ineffectual IT slacker giving the rest of us a bad name.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:29, Reply)
None of the things on my desk are outstanding.
They are the tools I use daily. I don't go around fixing other peoples crap. Thats for the techs to do.

So there.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:31, Reply)
Sure thing mate
Turn those fucking macbooks around, you utter disgrace.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:36, Reply)
Unfortunately the job they pay me for is a Mac Developer.
Loads of people here use Macs. The Systems need maintaining and developing and I need to use macs to do this and test. I know it won't help my case but at home I have 4 computers and one tablet and none of them are apple products.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:56, Reply)
Spac Developer, more like.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:01, Reply)
Go fix some computers IT Monkey

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:03, Reply)
A dell lattitude hooked up to a monitor and a keyboard.
A box containing 2 jars of bacon jam, out of date coffee and chilli sauce.
A tin of Yorkshire Tea.
The best of Suburban Base Records.
Bubblewrap.
Paper strewn all over the place like a mad woman's shit.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:32, Reply)
I don't care, tell Swipe its her boring altalt question

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:33, Reply)
Not rabbit, as it's delicious.
Picture1.png - Free Image Hosting by imgup.net
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:25, Reply)
I NEED to find a butcher that does game.
I have an urge to make a game pie, so nice.

I've got the filling of a steak and ale pie simmering away in the slow cooker.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:28, Reply)
The best part about game is going out and killing it yourself!

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:34, Reply)
I think it's time to start eating cats and dogs.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:25, Reply)
I don't understand why we don't eat dog
Its done in other countries, why not here, and horses and guinea pigs for that matter. I would happily eat all three.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:27, Reply)
Horse meat is delicious.
/ac.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:27, Reply)
I'd have a go on horse and dog.
Not cat, though. I like cats.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:30, Reply)
Budgie?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:31, Reply)
I'd eat budgie
but only swipey and froggles budgie
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:35, Reply)
What's the point? There's no meal on them.
Now, six budgies...now you're talking.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:37, Reply)
Four and twenty
Baked in a pie
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:37, Reply)
budgie actually means "good to eat"
apparently :(
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:05, Reply)
I've eaten dog before.
But I was a bit shit faced and silly.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:27, Reply)
That's not like you.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:29, Reply)
Have you experienced much without being shit-faced and silly?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:29, Reply)
YM.
It knocked me off the wagon.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:30, Reply)
She's quite a lady

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:30, Reply)
Now

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:32, Reply)
I'd eat it for my lunch today if it was on offer.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:32, Reply)
Human
Alt:
I used to be somewhat of a lunatic but I'm too fucking old and boring now

AltAlt:
Coffee, water, a family tree, the World Cup predictions chart and a Lego Yoda with a baseball cap on
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:31, Reply)
I think the consumption of human is already banned mate.
Good news for you!
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:33, Reply)
Fuck

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:33, Reply)
I thought it was what you wanted?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:34, Reply)
I DONT KNOW WHAT I WANT NOW!

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:47, Reply)
A phone. A puter. Water. A "Foods that harm , foods that heal" book. A mug with some pens in.
A pitcher of Carnival Crush.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:34, Reply)
That book sounds like a load of crystal hugging bullshit.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:37, Reply)
It is.
The fat bird I work with gave it to me and I didn't want to offend her.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:37, Reply)
Clearly worked for her then.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:39, Reply)
Hippy prick

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:37, Reply)
I'm fasting today
well, until I get hungry anyway.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:51, Reply)
I have povvo lunch of 20 "fishsticks"

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:51, Reply)
"crab" "sticks"

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:52, Reply)
Thats them

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:54, Reply)
Yuck.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:52, Reply)
For some reason, I really like them

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:54, Reply)
Surprisingly nice with lettuce and mayo in a sandwich.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:56, Reply)
Pevert.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:58, Reply)
I really like YM
But I wouldn't have her 20 times at lunchtime.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:59, Reply)
or would I?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:59, Reply)
I tried exercising last night.
Now I could eat all of the things. I've been hungry all day :*(

Exercising is nothing but trouble. I don't like it.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:59, Reply)
You shouldn't have got so fat then

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:00, Reply)
Tell me about it. The trouble is, booze and cake are just so delicious.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:01, Reply)
I reckon I could give up cake pretty easily

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:02, Reply)
Yeah, I don't give a shit about cake, to be honest.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:03, Reply)


(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:05, Reply)
Fookin disgrace

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:05, Reply)
It's a made up drug.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:07, Reply)
It's not made from plants, it's made from chemicals...by...sick bastards.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:11, Reply)
Chicken. Just to fuck up everyone's basis for comparison.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 10:55, Reply)
Ooo
Subversive. I like it
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:07, Reply)
I got some lamb chops from the supermatchgame
the other day that looked a bit suspect when I got them home. Upon nasal inspection they smelt like bad cheese.

Needless to say I had the last laugh and had Dalesteaks for tea.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:00, Reply)
You let dalesteaks in your house?
I would eat a whole sack of cheesy lambchops before I ate a dalesteak
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:02, Reply)
Pack of Dalesteaks, bag of oven chips and a can of beans.
Dinner of champions.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:06, Reply)
Fuck that kebab, I'm having this!

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:07, Reply)
wtf is a dalesteak?
yorkshire reared lambs?
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:08, Reply)
Delicious healthy fresh food!!

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:09, Reply)
They do a minted lamb version!!
www.dalepak.co.uk/dalepak.asp
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:11, Reply)
The Chinese Ribsteaks are an interesting and perfectly natural looking shape

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:12, Reply)
Nothing artifical about the colour either.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:12, Reply)
That's just the marinade of mysterious oriental herbs and spices.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:13, Reply)
+ RED

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:14, Reply)
powdered bug
cochineal I beleieve it's called.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:19, Reply)
I dont think they are allowed to use that now
It did used to be a crushed beetle, yes
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:21, Reply)
It is still used. Renamed as E120, but it's still the same thing.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:26, Reply)
Top Five London boroughs

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:28, Reply)
Did you go a bit 'Cher' in the middle of that sentence?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:25, Reply)
hahaha!

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:27, Reply)
Ooh they do shit veggie food too
www.dalepak.co.uk/dalepak-meat-free.asp
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:16, Reply)
their fb page is rather lol

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:19, Reply)
I bet you like 'stuffing balls' in your mouth
ha ha gay
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:24, Reply)
GAYlepak more like !!!!

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:26, Reply)
Dalepak make really fucking shit Grill"steaks"
They're minced up offel and shit cats of meat shaped to look nothing like a fucking steak. they leak gallons of fat when cooked and taste like shit.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:10, Reply)
shitcatlols

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:11, Reply)
I'm leaving it as I think it still works
I'd eat a sack of shit cats before I ate a Grill steak.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:12, Reply)
Dalepak Dale Steaks
Or grill steaks they are also known as. 6oz of your finest mechanically recovered beef.

There is more beef in cat food.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:11, Reply)
You know it's a quality product when you can buy it at Nisa.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:13, Reply)
mmmm jetwashed skeletons

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:13, Reply)
Fuck me, You're all foodwrongs.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:08, Reply)
maybe........
maybe your wife was right all along. IT IS YOU.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:16, Reply)
The beauty of it is that
it utilises all three areas of the cooker thus causing bepinnied french ponce Michelle Roux to admire your mad cooking skillz.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:09, Reply)
I'd add some tinned sweetcorn to that.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:07, Reply)
I've been informed that they work well on a BBQ
Wouldn't go near them myself, though.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:09, Reply)
Nah.
They're frozen. I wouldn't put them anywhere near a bbq, or my mouth.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:12, Reply)
No idea then.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:17, Reply)

steaks Winton
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:05, Reply)
I don't think I'd particularly miss having turkey.
Alt: I'm mostly well behaved.

AltAlt: Crumbs from breakfast biscuits, lots of polythene bags, about 300 pieces of paper, keyboard, phone, business cards, mouse, stacking trays, monitor, e45, and some ear plugs.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:05, Reply)

ear butt
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:06, Reply)
They wouldn't work too well, I'd say.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:07, Reply)
If you can only get an earplug up your arse
I'd say something's wrong.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:12, Reply)
Well, a butt plug wouldn't work too well in my ear, and vice versa.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:17, Reply)
E45?
Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:07, Reply)
Hand is a bit bollocksed at the minute, stops it from cracking.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:07, Reply)
Wankers claw.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:09, Reply)
I can't even claim 'wrong hand'
Tbh, think it's likely bad due to only having one properly usable hand for the last month, although I'm nearly back to full use now.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:10, Reply)
Too much of Fistina Palmer and her five lovely daughters?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:14, Reply)
You might as well fist it, you're addicted to love

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:16, Reply)
Broken bone in arm means that I have had little to no rotation in my left arm.
Not easy to rub cream in that way.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:17, Reply)
*gets the hose again*

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:17, Reply)
There are sunglasses on my dash board.
That's as close as I get to a desk.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:21, Reply)
plus old copies of the sun, crisp packets and old coke cans?

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:32, Reply)
Not on the dashboard no.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:38, Reply)
an extensive array of jazz mags.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:41, Reply)
Locks of hair from the murdered prostitutes.

(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:48, Reply)
No. We're not banning meat. Let's ban one vegetable instead.
Alt: Total goody-goody, but with a cheeky-chappie edge.

AltAlt: keyboard, 2 19" monitors, printer, paper, pens, empty Lord's mug and a Dilbert desk calendar.
(, Wed 18 Jun 2014, 11:43, Reply)

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