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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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FFS MomentsHave a rant here. Mrs Cow has just texted me to say she'd bought sauce for the chicken but not bothered to look if we actually had chicken. We dont have chicken
Our development team have come up trumps again and managed to fuck up two patches in the last week, and tried to blame us lot for it
Alt:
JOY Moments, lunch, whatever, just not fucking Friends
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:08,
149 replies,
latest was 11 years ago)
He is from the North East mateThat's practically cordon blue cooking up there
(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:18, Reply)
You fucking posh cuntSometimes it is possible to eat food that has been partially prepared by others
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:32,
Reply)
I always buy pasta sauce if I'm having pastabut last time it expired before I got round to having the pasta - but I did have a thing of chopped tomatoes and a bunch of other stuff so I made my own.
Pain in the arse, will buy in future.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:34,
Reply)
I am aghast, tomato sauce is possibly the easiest thing in the world to cookjar sauce is nasty
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:38,
Reply)
Cooking for yourself is shit when you can pay someone to do it for you(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:48,
Reply)
that me!Hey, i left two green tomatoes in the fruit bowl with some bannanas and they've ripened to a nice red colour
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:39,
Reply)
Between you and me mate standards are just rock bottom as to what constitutes posh round here x(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:42, Reply)
by using the "posh" you automatically highlight yourself as not being "posh"(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:43,
Reply)
Well quite, if "tea" isn't "chips and mushy peas" from the "chipper" you're virtually the Duke of Westminster.(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:48, Reply)
If it helps I've got some chicken thighs in the freezer(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:14,
Reply)
If you could have any animal in the world as a pet, what would you have?Sperm wahle I rekon
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:15,
Reply)
you keep your children like pets?Yiou monster
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:43,
Reply)
feels likle the insiode of my head in here(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:16,
Reply)
There are only a couple of minor annoyances about my new mobile telephoneOne being the lack of notification light for texts and emails, the other being that the exciting new 4G thing is great but where I spend most of my time, work and the half-flat, are both 'black spots' if that's the correct term, which means I get one less G most of the time. If I cross the road outside work I can get the extra G, but not here.
Also Begginflock has 2.0'd me again :((((((
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:17,
Reply)
I was going to try and help but I see you are being a spoonhanded bumface so I shall remove my offer(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:20, Reply)
Bloody Americans...Every time I hear "cellular" I think that it's been implanted in the owner's neck, like a bad episode of the X-Files.
(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:21, Reply)
How come in films and televisions americans never have an audible ringtone, just the vibrate thing? Also they never say hello, they press just the answer button and the other person immediately starts talking.(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:23,
Reply)
Perhaps they have it on vibrate because it's implanted somewhere else?(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:24, Reply)
I never have an audible tone But that's cos I am one of the cool kids
(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:27, Reply)
I turn sound off at work, hence me liking having a light thingy(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:28,
Reply)
don't the messages pop up on scereen? Will that do?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:29,
Reply)
Only if you see it, which I dont always, then if the screen goes dark there's nothing to tell you until you press buttons to make it light up again(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:31,
Reply)
Rumour has it that you do have a light "thingy" hahahahaThis is funny because it refers to a small penis
(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:30, Reply)
ACTUALLY IT'S FAIRLY COMMONwww.buzzfeed.com/katienotopoulos/14-women-tell-what-its-like-having-sex-with-a-micropenis#2xt4wr1
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:32,
Reply)
most tv americans don't say goodbye before they hang up eitherand they rarely finish drinks in bars which annoys me.
(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:28, Reply)
There is a setting you can use that'll use the flashlight for notifications, I think it's under Settings -> General -> Accessiblity (but google it if it ain't).(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:24,
Reply)
Nois problemos amigos(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:42,
Reply)
Around 5lbs of your bodyweight is made up from th eweight of bacteria in your stomach (, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:20, Reply)
Alt: The BBC have put all of the listingsFrom the Radio Times online, you can now take a look back to yesteryear and work out what you'd have been watching on the tellybox decades ago.
I do like a bit of nostalgia.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:27,
Reply)
www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/tvandradioblog/2014/oct/16/what-was-on-tv-the-day-you-were-born-bbc-genome
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:34,
Reply)
They did this too, which is quite interesting for a moment or twowww.bbc.com/earth/story/20141016-your-life-on-earth?ocid=socialflow_facebook
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:57,
Reply)
there are only 1500 Pigmy elephants left in Boneo :((
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:06,
Reply)
this is exactly how I feel about katie meluazzzzzzzzzzzzz(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:09,
Reply)
"A famous supplier of dog food was today rocked by an accusation that it grinds up critically endangered species to feed to dogs"(
Kroney, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:17,
Reply)
I drank too much diet drink and it gave me the shits yesterdaythen I got a headache cos I am dehydrated, then I took two co-dydramol for the pain but I took them on an empty stomach and now I have ebola.
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Peej, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:58,
Reply)
I drank too much diet drink and it gave me the shits yesterdaythen I got a headache cos I am dehydrated, then I took two co-dydramol for the pain but I took them on an empty stomach and now I have ebola.
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Peej, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 13:59,
Reply)
See, if you ate before 7pm this wouldn't have happened(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:00,
Reply)
Having the shits doesn't stop you from eatingunless you shit out of your face
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:13,
Reply)
Zactly Just take a bowl of curry into the shitter and *sings* its the circle of life
(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:16, Reply)
MeThe kids always want fed before then
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:14,
Reply)
Why not just feed the minicoos and then eat later?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:21,
Reply)
I cant be bothered to cook twice(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:44,
Reply)
Dont they do like a pedigree chum for kids these daysOr maybe a bakers complete kibble just lob it in a bowl and add a splash of water... it will give them bright eyes and a glossy coat
(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:58, Reply)
This'll teach you for binning your facebook, you'd get tons more attention if you kept it.Look at how much #Pray4PP got.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:07,
Reply)
5 or more likes can cure it(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:14,
Reply)
You binned FB? Where am I going to get updates on how great your wife is now?(
Kroney, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:16,
Reply)
Good job we saved all those Snaptwat pics from her, eh?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:17,
Reply)
They are also laminated onto the bog walls at work(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:20,
Reply)
His trying to get some action through public flattery and Nakers' desperate pandering to D-listers on Twitter have been the highlight of my online socialising for a while, now.(
Kroney, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:25,
Reply)
Just had a look, couple that with his needy attention seeking on here last night and you begin to see a man falling apart(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:33,
Reply)
We all should have seen the warning signs when he and his wife first appeared on awful reality show "Gogglebox"(
Kroney, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:37,
Reply)
About an hour ago I officially handed my keys back to my landlord and parted ways before remembering I'd left a bottle of Banks's in the fridge.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:09,
Reply)
Which will result in a £50 deduction from your deposit for 'removal of tenants possessions'(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:34, Reply)
The spare room full of shit I couldn't shift already saw to that.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:35,
Reply)
The only cunts bigger and more useless than developers are project managers.(
Kroney, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:15,
Reply)
I shall leave this hereb3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2389096
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:17,
Reply)
Without looking, I'm going to guess that this link is to my post on how I'm going to start more project management work.(
Kroney, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:18,
Reply)
^^^^I had another project failure today when the upgrade I had scheduled in by the PM ahdn't had any licences ordered. She really is getting rather good at fucking it all up
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:18,
Reply)
Hey, my upgrade workedThey just cant use the system
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:21,
Reply)
I'm not part of your system, I am a free man(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:23,
Reply)
We (just you and me) have a right laugh here(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:30,
Reply)
Not letting people use the system would stop nearly all support issues.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:42,
Reply)
Choices: Out of date, unsupported software or massive corporate piracy. How would you like me to grass you up, love?(
Kroney, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:22,
Reply)
I always let some other wetty worry about the licenses.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:36,
Reply)
The problem with being a developer is that you're constantly being made to look useless by the prick before you.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:37,
Reply)
It's the Server Boffins that do my head in.It always takes like 4-5 emails to apply a simple change in settings - Just give me WHM/CPanel and you can have the day off.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:43,
Reply)
I had to do frontline monkey work at an oil company.A lot of it was processing requests etc and I'm sure our only purpose was to give managers somebody to shout at whilst it went through so many pairs of hands (usually involving people who'd actually left) the person at the end of the approval list was so far removed from the work they might as well have been on the moon.
It's DBA's I feel sorry for. Having dicked about with Oracle doing very simple things should work, but don't for no discernible reason, I can understand why they are such miserable bastards.
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Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:47,
Reply)
Its the Tefal Boffins that do my head inI mean with their massive foreheads and non stick tech.
(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:48, Reply)
I'm a developerI am also a PRINCE2 Qualified Practitioner. THe level of uselessness I have achieved is hard to beat but the pays OK and I can work from home.
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Peej, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:49,
Reply)
Have we done today's socks?
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:29,
Reply)
That does look like you have one of those built up "special" shoes (, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:30, Reply)
I wore my Paul Smith stripey ones yesterday because nakers is all about the brand, but totally forgot to post them(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:32,
Reply)
No, just one Heel.#DoYouSeeWhatIDidThere
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:47,
Reply)
expensive Gordon Jones shoes ackshullythey're about 6 years old at this point.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:46,
Reply)
Gordon Bennett more likeahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahah Wheeze Ahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahaha
(, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 14:50, Reply)
Woah, have you seen that people have been threatening to rape Richard and Judy's daughter after Judy made those non violent rape comments?Sick sick freaks! Have they even looked at her? I wouldn't rape her with Ch*mpy's
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Peej, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:03,
Reply)
After an exploratory Google image search, I probably would.(
Kroney, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:15,
Reply)
HI GANG!!!Fucking hell man, this week has been so busy. pray for me!!
I've got some chicken if you want Sporters. I will post it up.
There's an actual swarm of ladybirds in the office. We are on the 6th floor and they are literally all over the windows.
It's end of days and it's pretty gay.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:08,
Reply)
HELLO CAN I HAVE A NUTSHELL OF THE WEEKS EVENTS THANKS(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:13,
Reply)
LOL"comedy" racism and sexismpeople mocking other people's chavvy taste in socks, shoes and watches
frog has a new phone.
dozer isn't dead yet, sadly.
that's about it.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:15,
Reply)
Thrilling,I have cheap work shoes too. Well, quite a few pairs.
dont really care whats on my feet for work.
People still use watches? what's wrong with looking at your phone?
Thanks!
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:19,
Reply)
i have designer high heelsthat hurt too much to walk anywhere beyond the photocopier, so i end up having to sneak chavtrainers in my bag and change when we go anywhere, which drives my boss INSANE.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:21,
Reply)
Watches are cooland don't involve taking my phone out of my pocket, waking it up, looking, putting it back to sleep, putting it back in my pocket.
It just involves the looking step. Clearly the superior solution in every way.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:58,
Reply)
You forgot Monty changing his name to ..........................(
Peej, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:27,
Reply)
Boredom, dehydration, aneurysm or other?(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:19,
Reply)
I dunno. I'm not a doctor.I have spent the last two days cleaning my gaff with various chemicals though.
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Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:20,
Reply)
I leave it to linger.When I was back at my mums I deliberately did a smelly hangover shit then shut the windows and door 'cos I knew she'd be having a bath soon.
I'm a great son, me.
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Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:23,
Reply)
Heres FFS momentMy new line manager just commented the Samsung doesn't sound like a very Japanese name.
No, no it doesn't.
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Peej, Thu 16 Oct 2014, 15:26,
Reply)
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