World Book Day
So today the calves have gone to school dressed as Spiderman and a fairy. What were your favourite books as a child? As an adult?

Alt:
Opening lines of your book...
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 9:52, 102 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Fucking world book day can get fucked, the time-wasting prick that it is.
Little tangle went out dressed as some bent thing from fucking Minecraft, because that's a fucking book or something now, I don't know.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 9:54, Reply)

Also, what fucking book are spiderman and a fucking fairy in?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 9:59, Reply)

www.amazon.co.uk/Spider-Man-annual-2012-Annuals/dp/1846531497
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:00, Reply)

www.amazon.co.uk/Bedtime-Stories-Collection-Erotic-Fairy/dp/0425232573
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:07, Reply)

eggsactly.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:11, Reply)

Spiderman is a comic book
It has the word book in it so it counts.
( Peej, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:07, Reply)

by that logic a child could dress up as a driving instructor from the theory test book.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:09, Reply)

Is the driving instructor a character in the theory test book?

( Peej, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:16, Reply)

y

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:19, Reply)

n

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:21, Reply)

comic book is an Americanism
and thus shit and for cunts.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:09, Reply)

Ok well this counts
www.amazon.com/Spider-Man-The-Venom-Factor-Novel/dp/0399140026
( Peej, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:17, Reply)

Kids are so bent.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 9:59, Reply)

They're such needy spastics.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 9:59, Reply)

always crying and begging for the handcuffs to be loosened.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:00, Reply)

I recently found out that kids expect to be fed every fucking day!

( Peej, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:07, Reply)

Just Say No!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:08, Reply)

i don't book.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:00, Reply)

You can't just turn up unannounced

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:01, Reply)

i think you'll find i do what i want

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:04, Reply)

plus the dreaded.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:01, Reply)

incontinence pads are VAT exempt

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:04, Reply)

really? that's good to know.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:06, Reply)

so are airships

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:14, Reply)

Fave books as a child were the Narnia series and Stig of the dump.
As an adult I like Sci-fi. Especially classic stuff - Asimov, Heinlein, Pohl, Vonnegut et al. I also love William Gibson's stuff, not just the 'sprawl' series.

Alt: 'It's surprising how many household items you can use as weapons - if you have to'.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:02, Reply)

The Stig of the Dump series was fucking horrible

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:36, Reply)

spiderman?
I like comics, but I'm aware also that they are not a book. And really shouldn't be includes in this book day thing.

Alt: It sounded like a shotgun full of eels being fired at a bouncy castle when he came on her tits.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:03, Reply)

He's 5 innit
Altlols
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:36, Reply)

they should swap costumes on the way, confuse everyone
god, how long have you got?? famous five, anne of green gables books, jinny books, green knowe books, jill pony books, malory towers/st clares books, hardy boys, nancy drew, narnia, willard price adventure books, everything by roald dahl ever...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:04, Reply)

you were an incredibly middle class child for a northerner.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:05, Reply)

well we moved to buckinghamshire when i was 4
after the other children laughed at me for saying "plum" in a yorkshire accent, i sounded like the queen by the end of the week.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:07, Reply)

hahaha Yorkshire.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:09, Reply)

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahah
Backwards cunts.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:12, Reply)

i could take this if you weren't from SOUTH LONDON
what have you done for the world except sticking a few wriggly fish in some jelly, eh?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:25, Reply)

built the British Empire?
Greenwich Naval College, Deptford Docks and Woolwich Arsenal.

Fucking Northern Monkey.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:29, Reply)

they built those things IN south london because it was such a derelict wasteland
they were probably designed and built by northerners
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:32, Reply)

^^this^^

(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:36, Reply)

in fact, isn't the naval college one of christopher wren's?
he definitely wasn't from london, he was from ooh-arr wiltsharr
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:55, Reply)

alt: "at 10pm on stonecutter street the reuters wires begin to tick"

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:05, Reply)

nice metre

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:26, Reply)

it's called "the hourglass factory"
the plot sounds great, mixing suffragettes with the circus in 1912. i've only just started it, not quite sure the writing lives up to the promise of the plot, but it's very very readable nonetheless, would recommend.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:32, Reply)

I sent Clay Jr in as a Spock zombie holding a packet of fags

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:05, Reply)

So it is
My sprogs went as Alice from Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Tinkerbell from Peter Pan

I like too many books to list soz

Alt. He drove in his fast car, getting as much good sex as he wanted
( Peej, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:05, Reply)

alt alt
As he pulled up in his Honda Accord the International Supermodel Convention was immediately moist.....
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:07, Reply)

spider-mon not book

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:15, Reply)

Graphic novel

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:13, Reply)

I liked the Earthsea trilogy and pretty much anything else I could get my hands on
"Before I start explaining how I came to strangle Alan Titchmarsh, we should talk about the rumours of his ostrich fetish."
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:20, Reply)

Best opening line yet

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:47, Reply)

It's a dark comedy

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 12:10, Reply)

must......resist......temptation.......to ...say...gnnn....spider-man.....is ...not...book.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:21, Reply)

as a child it was probably The Twits
As an adult, Naked Lunch. Or Lolita.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:25, Reply)

I dont know about favourite as a kid I have fond memories of the Tripod series and I also liked Call of the Wild
as an adult I only read porn.

Alt: The found him, the wheezing rasp of his smokers lungs and the smell of pies where a giveaway
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:27, Reply)

I only ever read the Quran
I sent my children out dressed as the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him)
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:27, Reply)

Anyone saying "_________ isn't a book"
obviously hasn't been faced with "oh, by the way it's world book day tomorrow and I need a costume". Any vague tenuous connection you can make between what can be found in the wardrobes or dressing up box and a book/comic/annual/pamphlet/hastily written side of A4 is gratefully received.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:27, Reply)

^ sent his child to school in bondage gear in a 50 shades tribute

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:30, Reply)

*guiltily admits to considering this*

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:31, Reply)

More responsible parents are aware of these things with plenty of time to buy or prepare a decent costume.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:31, Reply)

Yeah, bunch of smug cunts

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:32, Reply)

Pyjamas, dressing gown.
Arthur Dent.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:58, Reply)

*takes notes*

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:14, Reply)

They had an Australia Day at my eldest's school a few weeks ago, with the instruction to dress in 'traditional Australian dress'
I looked this up on an Australian government website and they were pretty clear that they don't have a national dress.
So instead I stripped him naked, except for a loincloth, blacked him up and sent him in as an Aborigine.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:38, Reply)

My kids were sent as book characters and no-one commented
Just sayin'
( Peej, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:40, Reply)

She-Ra and Breha Organa are not books

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:45, Reply)

Why would they dress up as themselves?

( Peej, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:49, Reply)

DUURRR
As each other, THTUPID
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:51, Reply)

( Peej, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:57, Reply)

Deeply erotic stuff

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:59, Reply)

mini shambles made a fairy costume but I reckon it was just so she could stay up late
and micro shambles went as a lion with a witch's hat because she's menkle

Last year she wore a lab coat and fairy wings
(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:34, Reply)

alt: "Cleanliness is next to Godliness, Richard," quipped Hyacinth as she wet wiped Richard's muck off her fanny.

( $$ ✅, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:54, Reply)

Spunking up Appearances

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 10:55, Reply)

This has made me do a sad face
I hope you are happy
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:07, Reply)

:O)

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:09, Reply)

queefing up appearances

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:08, Reply)

Oh is that why my Facebook is alive with pics of stupidly dressed children?
I liked the Puddle Lane books ad a kid from what I remember. Then I moved onto Point Horror as a teen.

alt. Their dilated pupils met over a sweaty dancefloor.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:08, Reply)

That's what you get for friending Baggyfrock
tupid canti
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:15, Reply)

No, that's because you are a predatory paedophile.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:17, Reply)

Urgh. I'd sooner skin them alive than fuck them tbh

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:17, Reply)

Strange that you are 'friends' with so many on social networks

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:18, Reply)

They interviewed a nonce-catcher on the radio last night, but he kept using so many ghastly incorrect words and phrases, such as saying 'borrow' when he meant 'lend', that in the end I was on the side of the paedos.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 5 Mar 2015, 11:21, Reply)