Tenuous
My most tenuous claim to fame is that my mother-in-law used to work in a Fish & Chip shop that Joe Longthorne used to frequent.

What's your most tenuous caim to fame? The more vague the better; your cousin once fitted a carpet for Barry Took - that sort of thing.

Edit: I just thought, my cousin once-removed was in the support band for a The Hollies tour a good while back.

Edit 2: I've promoted this to a QOTW suggestion. Surely it has scope to run for a week. Should it bear any relation to which suggestion gets picked, go here and click.

www.b3ta.com/questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post468149
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:12, 68 replies, latest was 17 years ago)

I used to live next door to JRR Tolkein's nephew
how's that?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:20, Reply)

I have 2.
When my dad was in the navy, the Queen came aboard the ship, to survey it or whatever the queen does, and my dad made the locker in which she stored her shoes. Beat that.

Oh, and I was once friends with a boy who knew Bernard from Bernard's Watch.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

Stan Boardman used to fancy my mother.
We used to live in a pub when I was a teenager and he would turn up to do a show before he was very famous. My mother being German would get the whole 'I hate the Geeeermans' banter.

Edit - Just remembered that my mum nearly went to one of the Nolan sisters wedding.
( girlinthehole, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

I was sort-of friends with the guys from British Sea Power when at uni
When I tell people this I often get 2 responses:

1) Who are British Sea Power?

2) Who are you and why are you talking to me?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:25, Reply)

When I was at primary school,
Gary Newman did an aerial acrobatics display in his plane for our school fête.
( Cawl, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:25, Reply)

The man who made the wigs (and won an Oscar for them) for Lord of the Rings
lives in my village
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:30, Reply)

While at uni I knew the girlfriend of the guitarist from the Cooper Temple Clause
I also knew the brother of Rhona Mitra.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:32, Reply)

I have 3
I went to school with Bloc party
I went to uni with the daughter of one of AC/DC
I shagged Alex from blur
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:33, Reply)

'Alex from Blur'
Ooo, nice.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:36, Reply)

Oh Becky! Alex!
I really hate you for that!
I managed to get into their aftershow in 1997 but he was with his girl at the time and probably wouldn't have done the rudes with me anyway :(
I went to see them on Friday and I almost fainted every time I looked at him. I'll always love him. *sniff*
How was it?????
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:43, Reply)

I hope it was during his fringey indie cool phase
and not his cheesemaking, country gent, Guardian wittering, twat phase.

Though bonus points if you got to taste his cheese.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 14:39, Reply)

Haha, it was just after they stopped being cool, so about 97/98 I think

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 15:56, Reply)

He was still cool then
He's still cool now. Argh!
Go on, how was it Becky???
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 17:06, Reply)

I have loads
My Gran used to feed Syd Barretts cat

My Mate went to the same school as the kid that plays Draco Malfoy

Another Mate is friends with the parents of the kid that plays Ginny Weasely

Philip Schofields brother ran a record shop in my street

After my band played a gig Roger Taylor came up and shook my hand but I didn't know who he was.

Theres more but I think my gran feeding Syds cat is the best.
( Peej, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:34, Reply)

phillip schofield's brother joined a company I worked with during my year out before uni
shortly after I left
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:42, Reply)

Now THAT is tenuos
Philip Schofield got married at a Castle near my house (Ackergill Tower, far North of Scotland) - nice place!
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:19, Reply)

A few years back
I got a strange phone-call from a soft spoken Irish-man (or was it a woman?) asking to speak to my mother. I responded with the standard nonchalant "huhhhhhhhhh?.... I'll jus geddherrr..." and then I went back to playing Football Manager or whatever I was doing.

A few minutes later my mum bursts into the room, all redfaced and dancing screaming "THAT WAS DANIEL O'DONNELL!!!!" to which I smiled and shrugged. Of course I know who he is, he may have sold over 10 million records but he's still a granny-grabbing sleazy cunt to me.

Anyway, it turns out that the official "worlds biggest Daniel O'Donnell fan" had popped her clogs, probably O-Ding on Danny O'Dee (nice!) or something. In her will she had left aaaaaalll her DoD records and memorabilia to the second biggest DoD fan on earth, which happenend to be my dear mother.

I may be stretching the extreme of tenuousness but it's a nice-ish story nonetheless...
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:34, Reply)

Oh my God
My mate's mother thinks SHE'S his biggest fan, and my cousin's little lad regularly gets his hair bouffanted at Toni & Guy so he thinks HE'S his biggest fan.
Whereas your mum really is his biggest fan, and that's official. Like royal lineage...

It's a bizarre phenomenon, the cult of Daniel.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:55, Reply)

I'm mates with the drummer from 12 sences and the singer from fallen to
but they aren't really famous anymore
( Peej, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:35, Reply)

I once
Looked after Claire Murray's son (she of Woman's Hour on Radio 4) whilst she was working with Dad on a radio show.

And my particular favourite... me.

When I was 16, and choosing a college to go to, my school of the time had an open day for all the local colleges to come in and show their wares, as it were- why people should study there and so forth.

One of them was Sheffield College- and their claim to being the best to go to was that three of the top journalists in the country (this was in 1999) had studied there. This included Jeremy Clarkson, some other bloke, and... my Dad.

When I noticed this on the pamphlet, I mentioned these names to the people on the desk. And then told them who I was.

I've never seen anyone from bored stiff to fawning sycophant so quickly.

So yes, you are in the presence of someone tenuously (and quite possibly tediously) famous.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:37, Reply)

I think you'll find...
...that's JENNY Murray.



Peasant.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:27, Reply)

I used to go out with someone
who was a support act for Paul Young's new (post-popularity) band's gig
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:38, Reply)

My sister
played a rat in the stage version of The Pied Piper, with Matthew Kelly in the lead role.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:40, Reply)

The Paed Piper?

( Cawl, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:50, Reply)

WIN!

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:51, Reply)

Why thank you.
I've won the internet, and it's before 10.
Life is good.
( Cawl, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:52, Reply)

In the epsiode of Blue Peter
where Caron Keating launched our village's lifeboat by smashing a carton of milk on it, I can be seen on the slipway in a blue hat and brown dufflecoat, looking bored.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:41, Reply)

I used to hang out with the singer from The Cazels
My neighbour growing up was Smart E's who had a hit with Sesame's Treet. A godawful early 90s hardcore version of the Sesame Street theme.

I sat next to Geoffrey the butler from Fresh Prince on a flight... Nice guy.
(MyFakeName, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:42, Reply)

The inventor of the barcode
lives in Sproatley. I occasionally delivered his newspaper when younger and covering someone else's route.
(Land of Green Ginger It's dreamy weather, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:43, Reply)

1 dimensional or 2 dimensional barcodes?

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:45, Reply)

Judging by the size of his house
Both
(Land of Green Ginger It's dreamy weather, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:01, Reply)

My job
used to have a lot to do with barcodes, like the different fonts and how to stop people making counterfiet ID cards and stuff. I'd loved to have met Monsieur Barcode!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:11, Reply)

I found out this weekend
that my grandfather's brother-in-law was a nephew or similar of David Dunbar Buick, he of the Buick Motor Company.
(Land of Green Ginger It's dreamy weather, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:44, Reply)

I met Jeremy Beadle on my 10th birthday and have the photographic proof
I met most of my musical heroes from the 90s by seeing that they were fans of other bands I liked

I trained Keef Richards puppy

Reece Shearsmith lives in my town and we wave at each other if we see each other at the tube station
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 9:54, Reply)

Stop knowing all of my crushes! : (

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:19, Reply)

You fancy Keef?
voms a little

Voms some more
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 15:56, Reply)

Oh you cheeky mare!
You know I meant Reece...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 17:07, Reply)

My grandparents
used to run The Dublin Castle pub in Camden. They were the first people to have live music there & well, I like to think that my family are a little responsible for Britpop (for better or worse).
(MyFakeName, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:00, Reply)

I once met
the dude who played R2D2 in Morrissons. Kenny Baker I think his name is. I was about 5, and I was still taller than him...
(berk, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:01, Reply)

I've met him too
He's tiny.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:27, Reply)

Ooh Ooh, how could I forget.
My cousin used to date the singer of Flowered Up singers of such hit as Weekender.

The college I went to used to have Mark Knopfler as an English Tutor & I used to have a saturday job with a lady who was in one of his classes. She was also mates with Jonathan & Paul Ross.
(MyFakeName, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:07, Reply)

OMG, remember the media tutor
HOWARD GOLDSHAFT? Best pornstar name evar
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:15, Reply)

Howie G
You don't forget someone like that.
(MyFakeName, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:21, Reply)

He was very awesome
Made me a copy of clockwork orange about 2 years before it was released mainstream.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:27, Reply)

My dad does the plumbing for Nigel Martyn's parents.
And if you don't know who NM is, then you're worthless and dim.
( thealternativefact, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:19, Reply)

My tutor at uni
Used to share a house with Nigel Marvin.
And he kept a blind cave salamander in the salad drawer in the fridge.
( Cawl, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:24, Reply)

Well now
I've been in a recording studio which is on land owned by the son of the author Rosamunde Pilcher.

Tenuous enough?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:28, Reply)

You know that episode of Only Fools & Horses when Damien in born?
The one that ends with Del Boy standing at the hospital window as the camera zooms out.

I was born in that very room.
(bill, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:29, Reply)

^ this
must be the winner surely
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:34, Reply)

Absolutely!
I can't wait to touch Bill now and absorb some of this fame.
*touches Bill*
Yes, it did have to be there.
( thealternativefact, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:37, Reply)

Well Hello!

(bill, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:45, Reply)

:D

( thealternativefact, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:58, Reply)

It's a baby!!!
*sniff*
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:37, Reply)

I saw Alan Davis in bar in edinburgh once
All alone, looking as miserable as anything. Offered to buy him a drink. He then expected drinks through the whole night and was busy slagging off everyeone and everything.

So I called him a cunt and left.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:35, Reply)

My uncle
farted on Shakin' Stevens whilst exiting a minibus while on holiday.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 10:46, Reply)

^ these just keep getting better and better
Sorry Bill, your OFAH claim has been beaten.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 14:17, Reply)

My Dad used to empty Carla Lane's bins
EDIT: He was a binman. He's not a raccoon.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:12, Reply)

Hahaha!

( Cawl, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:26, Reply)

thought I should clarify...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:35, Reply)

Well, naturally.

( Cawl, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:46, Reply)

Erm...
That was odd, I'll redo it.

My Dad grew up in Great Missenden, meaning that he used to see Roald Dahl almost every day at the train station.

Also, one of my high schools had two fairly well known rugby teachers. One ex-international and one current international

Those claims are pretty shit, aren't they?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:15, Reply)

Loads!

My second cousin - who works for the Beeb, has a desk opposite Jeremy Paxman's.

My second best friend at primary school's uncle is Melvyn Hayes: 'Gloria' from 'It ain't half hot mum'

My dad's best friend at school was the life-long partner of the guy that made the Queen's hats.

I was roadie for a band that performed at an all-nighter on the same bill as Richard Hell and the Voidoids.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 11:23, Reply)

I once...
...drove a train from Norwich to Ipswich, and Charles Clarke (at the time he was Education Secretary) was a passenger in 1st Class.

Other East Anglian celeb passengers include chat show host Trisha Goddard and TV chef Patrick Anthony (of Patrick's Pantry).
( Amos E Wolfe makes vinyl signs and things like that, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:43, Reply)

More tenuous
In the 1971 film "Revenge" the terraced house in High Wycombe that is seen at the beginning is next door to where my grandparents used to live.

www.imdb.com/title/tt0067248/
( Amos E Wolfe makes vinyl signs and things like that, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 12:47, Reply)

I once
Sold Kate Winslet a swimming pool... In a way. She faxed it in and I processed it

Beat that!
(Is this a good idea? ... Yes this is definitely a good idea, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 13:18, Reply)

Very tenuous
I knew the godparents of the British actress Victoria Tennant who was once married to the US actor/comedian Steve Martin.

They're dead now - the godparents.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 13:53, Reply)

My Dad
Is a Rambler. He goes walking as a pastime. Odd that. However it has lead to him rambling with Mike Harding no less. Top bloke apparently. Drinks Lama piss.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 30 Jun 2009, 14:25, Reply)

i have a few non-tenuous links to celebrity, but my favourite tenuous one is that:
my first ever girlfriend's dad knew jim broadbent to say hello to

also, i work with a girl who processed an insurance renewal for Edwina Currie
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:47, Reply)