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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Best of 2009
Come on then, what were the best records, books and films of 2009?

I've not been impressed by any new music or films at all. Revelation by CJ Sansom was my favourite book - it's been a while since an author has consistently written stuff that kept me up reading til stupid o'clock in the morning because I simply couldn't stop, but this fellow is a superb storyteller.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:26, 139 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
District 9 was probably the best film I saw.
Juno also, but that came out before this year I think.

War of the Worlds was just about the only book I read this year.

Okami was the best game I played. That's been out for years.

I'm just realising how behind I'm getting. All you hip youngsters with your flat top fades and your Sony Walkmans.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:43, Reply)
Record: Slayer: World Painted Blood. or 69 Eyes: Back In Blood.
Film: Dead Snow.
Book: Malcom Pryce: From Aberystwyth With Love.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:49, Reply)
Alright!
Hmmm...

Well I would say that the best film I saw this year was Inglorious Bastards, mainly because I was initially quite sceptical and ended up loving it!

Best book for me was probably The Strain by Guillermo del Toro and Chuck Hogan - it was an amazing book and I can't wait for the next instalment.

Best album... I'm not really sure what's new in music anymore, but my most listened to album of the year was probably Face to Face - How To Ruin Everything.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:52, Reply)
Not much to see in 2009 to be fair
Best Album - Abramson Singers, Leah Abramson
Best Film - Antichrist, Lars Von Trier
Best Book - Never read any that were written in 2009 unfortunately, best I did read was The Yage Letters by William Burroughs

2010 brings the new Gaspar Noe film, Enter The Void. A drug soaked visual interpretation of what it is like to be shot whilst high on DMT and the subsequent struggle to disengage from the living world. One for all the family i think!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:52, Reply)
Rated PG. Includes mild peril.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:54, Reply)
What about
brief nudity?
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:57, Reply)
If you're offering.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:58, Reply)
I'm not offering
I'm demanding!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:00, Reply)
*flashes*

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:02, Reply)
Crumbs
*is all of a flutter*
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:06, Reply)
To the best of my knowledge
It includes scenes of actual sex, full penetration with extra spunky fireworks. In fact, I think there is a scene of an internal ejaculation....so maybe it might be a 12A after all.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:05, Reply)
Hehehe
You can have a click for 'extra spunky fireworks'
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:07, Reply)
CJ Sansom
DiT has read them all and really enjoyed the books so I think I'll have to get involved when I've finished my current book and see what all the fuss is about! Aren't they making the books into a film too with Nicholas Cage!?
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:53, Reply)
Well if DiT threw a book off a cliff would you read it?

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:59, Reply)
Nope
it would be all wet if it went off a cliff and fell in the sea. As he has kept it on our bookshelf, I feel more inclined to give it a go! :D
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:01, Reply)
Yeah... exactly!

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:03, Reply)
This is a joke. Tell me this is a joke because you know I hate him.
I read that Kenneth Branagh was due to star in a TV adaptation. That's bad enough, thank you very much.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:00, Reply)
Hehehe panic not
its a joke!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:04, Reply)
DON'T. DO. THAT. TO. ME.
Please. My heart can't cope with the trauma..

Do you want a man's death on your hands?
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:06, Reply)
Apologies
I am sure he is going to be starring in some film soon (which has been adapted from a book I like) which I am annoyed about... I just can't remember what it is exactly!?!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:09, Reply)
The House at Pooh Corner.
He's going to be Christopher Robin.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:15, Reply)
Nothing would surprise me when it comes to that horsefaced balding cunt.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:19, Reply)
Sorcerer's Apprentice?
As I recall, even the trailer caused an argument...
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:51, Reply)
Oh yeah
Because it looked rubbish! Hahaha
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:46, Reply)
It is a joke...
But the Branagh thing you mention is right - he owns the rights to it. Seeing as he was fantastic in Wallander, though, I'll reserve judgement...
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:50, Reply)
Hmmmmm
Record: More of a discovery, Jace Everett
Book: Zafon: The Angels Game.
Film: Never go to cinema so will need to wait for purchase of DVDs.
Always behind but I don't mind.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:54, Reply)
Are you making one of those top 100 clip shows full of cunts?
Do your own reasearch, I'm not your bitch.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:58, Reply)
Alright captain happypants
Did you have a nice Xmas?
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 9:59, Reply)
It was pretty good thanks,
at home there is currently a morrocan lamb stew bubbling away in my new slow cooker.
Either that or my flat's on fire, we'll find out when I get home.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:00, Reply)
Fuckin nom!

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:02, Reply)
There'll be some interesting vomit this evening to be sure.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:05, Reply)
My mate made me a lovely moroccan lamb stew a few weeks ago
Ooh slow cooked the lamb will just fall apart. Gorgeous.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:10, Reply)
Did you put out?

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:40, Reply)
No.
I had a bloke at the time, and he knew that, so I don't think he was hoping the lamb stew would make me stray.
I hope not.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:49, Reply)
Oooh very nice too!
I'm sure your flat is fine. I know a few people who use slow cookers while they're at work, and all their houses are flame-free... for now anyway!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:05, Reply)
Are you threatening me?

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:06, Reply)
Maybe
*looks at feet*
*puts away binoculars*
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:09, Reply)
*fortifies home*

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:11, Reply)
I can't believe no-one's twigged that I'm Jimmy Carr until now.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:03, Reply)
It's the face punching
Carr is more of a receiver than a giver.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:07, Reply)
I've heard that.
In spite of my hating his fucking guts, he has cracked some pretty amusing gags in his time.

I didn't like him when he was in Lloyd Cole and Commotions though.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:11, Reply)
OBSCURE POST OF THE WEEK

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:16, Reply)
He's way more cheeful than you

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:08, Reply)
Morning!
I enjoyed the Hangover.
I went to see Blur and the Waterson Family live (separately) and got emotional.
I can't remember anything else.
Oh, despite my best efforts, I thoroughly enjoyed Paolo Nuttini's new album.

I loved trees and sky and water and snogs the best.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:06, Reply)
Ooooh
I need to get Paolo Nuttini's new album - is it all good?
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:10, Reply)
Honestly, Spotify
It's completely different from the last album. Seems like they all just sat in a room and jammed happiness.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:11, Reply)
Ah good plan Batman
I will investigate tonight! :D
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:13, Reply)
I can help with this.
No. It's fucking shit.

He has the most affected voice I've heard in years - why does he sing like a witless spastic with a frog in his throat?. That's not his normal voice. And his 'stage act' seems to involve pretenting to be a blind autistic flid.

I think he's trying to appear 'soulful'. If I saw him his face would have a sole-full I can tell you. Ooh, I'm so into this fake-voiced shit I'm singing that I've lost the power of sight!

Give up.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:15, Reply)
He's only a boy. Leave him be.
His last song sounded like The Bear Necessities and there's a nice one about his dad.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:16, Reply)
He's from Paisley
A piss soaked ghost town in which I used to live. His music is well vanilla though, and I think he is trying to sound like Frankie Miller most of the time.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:19, Reply)
He sounds like Fozzie fucking Bear.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:21, Reply)
Steps were trying to sound like Abba
and failed miserably. Their music still brings me joy in my heart.
There are more imprtant people to criticise than a nice young man from the chipshop that wants to be a proper singer from the old days.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:22, Reply)
Why does he pretend to be blind? What's wrong with him?

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:25, Reply)
Dunno, ask Joe Cocker and Stevie Wonder the same question

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:26, Reply)
Joe Cocker always looked like a disabled.
I most definitely would ask him why he was doing that shit, too. Before punching his grizzled lights out, of course.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:31, Reply)
Stop fighting, Mont
Just stop, let yourself rest. You've been fighting so long...
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:34, Reply)
It's in my blood. I just can't help myself.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:35, Reply)
I didn't know the heirs to the Mr Kipling cake empire
Were fighters.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:37, Reply)
well now you do.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:40, Reply)
I KNEW that was you!!!!

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:41, Reply)
Aww
Don't be a bummer, I like him. His music is fun and happy! :D
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:25, Reply)
Did you really just call me a bummer?

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:26, Reply)
*looks*
*checks*

Yup!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:27, Reply)
Is a bummer
a step up or a step down from a bender?
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:31, Reply)
I'm too aghast to think straight.
A bummer indeed.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:32, Reply)
just one of many straight things that you don't do

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:13, Reply)
Well
I meant to call him a bumhead, but I wrote bummer instead... and then was too lazy to change it.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:33, Reply)
EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING
MONTY'S TELLING US WHAT'S WRONG WITH SOME SORT OF MUSIC
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:32, Reply)
I'm out of my depth here
I don't know what music I'm supposed to dislike!!!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:33, Reply)
EVERYTHING!
(that's the only way to be sure)
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:34, Reply)
Just ask me. I know everything.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:34, Reply)
You are afterall
the voice of reason as always
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:35, Reply)
You need to follow Montys 3 step plan.
1. Wait until someone says something about music.
2. Write a patronising 6 line reply about why not only is that music bad but anyone who likes them is the worst kind of scum.
3. Go to 1
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:36, Reply)
'worst kind of scum'?
Is he Jeremy Kyle?

YOU'RE SCUM, YOU'RE ALL SCUM!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:38, Reply)
GET OFF MY STAGE

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:39, Reply)
YOU SICKEN ME
YOU VILE SCUMMMMM!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:40, Reply)
My nephew said that to me
pretty much the whole of yesterday
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:41, Reply)
Hehe
What were you doing on his stage, were you outshining him?
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:43, Reply)
God knows
He kept saying it, pointing like Chris Griffin's monkey, then collapsing into giggles.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:44, Reply)
How very strange

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:46, Reply)
Not really
When you consider he's related to me by blood.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:50, Reply)
Ah you're lovely and
perfectly well-adjusted! :)
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:54, Reply)
Tenner's in the post
;)
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:57, Reply)
Wicked!
Thanks!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:57, Reply)
It's much easier to say "Not my cup of tea, pal"
and move on
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:38, Reply)
It's actually even easier to say nothing.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:39, Reply)
Prove it.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:41, Reply)
Subtle

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:44, Reply)
Noice.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:45, Reply)
I never take the easy way out.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:45, Reply)
You could always take 'the coward's way out'...

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:49, Reply)
I think you should be the OFFICIAL MOD OF OT
Its clearly the job you're meant to do!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:42, Reply)
How will that work?
Will he naughty step himself?
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:43, Reply)
Only once a year
to maintain the careful balance he will have created.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:45, Reply)
I'd read everyones gazes.
THAT'S A SCARY THOUGHT ISN'T IT YOU BUNCH OF PERVS
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:46, Reply)
Hahaha
You probably read them anyway, seeing as you have mad interwebs skillz. I bet you have a list of everyones passwords and you snoop around our mailboxes when we're not online.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:51, Reply)
That thought just made me go *gulp*

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:51, Reply)
Me too actually
*runs away to delete the entire contents of mailbox - just in case*
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:53, Reply)
THERE'S STILL BACKUPS FLIM-FLAM
or should I say Mistress Pain
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:54, Reply)
Hahahaha
You nutter
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:58, Reply)
I wonder whos mailbox would be the most interesting to read.

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:07, Reply)
Not mine
It's really boring. Don't go near it.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:10, Reply)
Hahahaha
*sings smooth operator*
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:13, Reply)
Haha
Do you sing that at drunk men who try to chat you up?
I do.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:15, Reply)
I may have been
known to do that... maybe...
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:21, Reply)
Hell no,
that'll be like reading the fetishes /qotw with the added horror of knowing what you lot look like.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:52, Reply)
Hehe
That is a scary thought indeed.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:53, Reply)
You cheeky bastard
I'm delicious and so is Flim, and well you know it.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:55, Reply)
*nods head*
HARD!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:58, Reply)
I would rule with an iron fist
and my reign of terror would last for a thousand aeons.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:50, Reply)
I would ban you for not understanding how replies work
BAN YOU HARD
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:51, Reply)
See you're already power hungry
I think you'd be great!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:52, Reply)
oooh
Books - its a stand up fight between 'Best served cold' by Joe Abercrombie and 'Transition' by Iain Banks (honourable mention to The Boys graphic novels) was mildly disappointed with unseen academicals but have merrily romped my way through the Neil Asher back catalogue

Music - Hahahaha probably the closest I have got to a new album was Sacrement from Lamb of God (very good) and Death Magnetic by Metallica (just give up boys, about half a dozen good tracks since Master of Puppets album 20 odd years ago!)

Fillums - Didn't see any films released in 2009 I think, but really liked Eastern Promises and A bittersweet life that I saw this year
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:37, Reply)
*points at musical opinion*

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:39, Reply)
*points at your chest*

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:43, Reply)
I'm proud of my moobs!

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:47, Reply)
aha
if you looked down I was going to slap your chin.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:48, Reply)
okaaaaaaaaaay...
best book: the broons/oor wully annual
best film: the simpson's movie or the wrestler
best record: bob dylan's christmas in the heart.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:41, Reply)
the simpson's movie?

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:45, Reply)
dvd for £3.
bargain.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:46, Reply)
It's on Channel 4 in the next few days.
Bargainer!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:53, Reply)
it's been in our dvd player for months.
weeblaireau luvs it.
keeps her mesmerised so i can lash into the gin without fear of interruption.

bargainer: great wordage!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 10:56, Reply)
I gave it 10 minutes
then switched it off. It's like all the shit new tv episodes. Only worse.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:00, Reply)
Ahhh you're using the "how much this film will help me get drunk" rating system
that explains why you think it was one of the best of the year.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:06, Reply)
is there any better rating system?
it's the same with the dylan christmas album, the bairn loves it.
put it on repeat and was able to sneak out to the pub for 3 hrs.
fantastic.
don't tell the mrs though, it can be our little secret.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:16, Reply)
I assume that is a joke?

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:20, Reply)
kinda.
well yeah.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:29, Reply)
kinda?
well you either did or you didn't..
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:38, Reply)
of course i didn't.
i'm achly a loving and attentive father.
and i don't drink anything like as much as folks probably think.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:40, Reply)
Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh, I get it....
It's the "Exasorate the problem in order to hide the underlaying truth" thing, I get it.

I should point out that I have no idea about your personal life, and don't really care if I do or don't, just that you seem to be going on about being a drunk quite a lot lately.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:25, Reply)
i'm just replying in kind, really.
i have finally realised that everything said about me on the interweb is true.
it must be cos it's on the interweb, yeah?
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:33, Reply)
I watched it off the internet
Bargainest!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:00, Reply)
WITHOUT WIRES ?!?!?!

(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:26, Reply)
so..
Music - Them Crooked Vultures with Honourable mention to Mastodons 'Crack The Skye' - thanks to the geeks on here for recommending.

Books - do comic books count? Batman & Son was ace and Grant Morrison can do no wrong at the moment.

Films - The Transformers movie was superb as well as Le Scaphandre Et Le Papillon (The Diving Bell and The Butterfly) - Julian Schnabel is the man - if only the fecker would make more films!

rafter
baz
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:03, Reply)
Transformers was awesome
Megan fox is just well I would. ;)
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:14, Reply)
ah they didnt overdo the Megan Fox stuff -
the first movie was too much about her and not enough robot footage whereas this one was total robo-awesomeness overkill. Absolutely geektastic!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:20, Reply)
Death album 2?
Also I did enjoy district 9.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 11:07, Reply)
Whoa, whoa, a music thread's been going for 3 hours?
I need to step up my vigilance. Where would all be without MY OPINION??!?!?!?

Most music has been shit this year. The best stuff's come out of the blues scene, viz. Ian Siegal's Broadside (excellent follow-up to, though not quite as awesome as, Swagger) and Joanne Shaw Taylor's White Sugar is a superb début, though that may be partly my bias in favour of any cute blonde girl who can play the guitar like Stevie Ray fucking Vaughan.

Oh, yes, almost forgot: Emily Loizeau's second album (Pays Sauvage) was an absolute blinder as well.

Best book I read was Bad Science by Ben Goldacre. Not sure if that was published this year or last, but we desperately need more people like him.

Didn't see that many films this year, but I did enjoy Coraline. And District 9.
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 12:35, Reply)
Bestest
I am pissed, so apologies before:
Bestest fillum: Avatar. Loved it, was lost in it for ages in t'cinema.
Record: The New Foo Fighters Album- superb
Book: Unseen academicals- even though Pratchett cant type, just as insane!
(, Thu 31 Dec 2009, 19:44, Reply)

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