morning all
how be everyone?


for those of you who have a little freedom at work - what do you do in the office before you actually start working (as in after you are supposed to be working)?

generally I read through some webcomics, check the BBC Sport pages and then attempt to begin my work
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 8:44, 45 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

morning flesh
alright here, how're you?
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 2 Mar 2010, 8:47, Reply)

I make a coffee
and then procrastinate until 10am, which usually involves reading the news, checking facebook and offtopic. Then when 10am rolls around I make another coffee. I think my body requires two coffees to function.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 8:50, Reply)

I watched last night's Newswipe in the iplayer
Sets me up propper for the day.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 8:56, Reply)

Hmmmm.
It takes so long to log onto our systems that I have time for the following:

1. Breakfast
2. Coffee
3. Read Offtopic
4. Check ALL my mail accounts
5. Read BBC front page
6. Coffee.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 2 Mar 2010, 8:59, Reply)

I read Telegraph and Guardian online

Eat a bowl of Kelloggs Start and drink a strong black coffee, I may also do a poo
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 8:59, Reply)

I came across a couple of things that made me laugh this morning
first - Portsmouth FC - a team in administration - are offering financial advice to supporters families.

second - this
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:06, Reply)

I crank up the Bowie
and have a wank stood on the photocopier, whilst crying and screaming the Lord's Prayer.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:24, Reply)

Do you find
that the Lord's Prayer falls into rhythm with the Bowie song in question? Or, if it's Let's Dance, that you can't help but play a little air guitar with your wanking hand?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:29, Reply)

I tend to play Space Oddity
It's most apt as I have hideously malformed genitals.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:30, Reply)

I'm singing the Lord's Prayer in my head
to the tune of Space Oddity now

I should thank you, really, I've hd Don't Stop Believin' stuck in my head for the last three days straight
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:33, Reply)

Cheers, you bastard
No I'm doing it.
It works particularly well with the countdown bit...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:34, Reply)

I is in your brain
Strumming your metaphorical strings
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:37, Reply)

Do one!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:42, Reply)

Good job I know you're a Scouser
If you were a posh that might be interpreted as an invitation to make whoopie
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:45, Reply)

Hahahah!
I just said that like a rah-rah and I see what you mean!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:55, Reply)

Thank fuck for that
I don't want to come across as some kind of sex-obsessed lunatic who's constantly grasping at the barest of straws to bring shagging up in conversation

Too late?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 10:01, Reply)

Nah, that's me dude.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 10:01, Reply)

I knew there was a reason I liked you
:-)
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 10:04, Reply)

I was about to start a thread asking if anyone else was following the cricket on Cricinfo
which probably answers your question
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:25, Reply)

get in
check b3ta for any gazzes (there never are) and to read anything posted overnight, plough through any good footie blogs on the bbc, check the news then have a smoke and a cuppa and ready for the day

Although today i'm on holiday, and off out in half an hour or so for the day
(Halfy By light alone, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:27, Reply)

Yeah
that Tim Vickery blogs are da bomb. I do prefer the blogs on the Times and Guardian websites though. Less neutral that the BBC. Also Chick Young can fuck off.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 10:04, Reply)

To be fair to Chick Young
He's commenting on the state of Scottish football. The temptation to just compose every blog with the words "It's fucked" must be overwhelming
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 10:06, Reply)

Fair enough
but he's still a dirty bluenose always with an agenda.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 10:59, Reply)

Ah
You're a Celtic fan. What were your lot thinking putting a Sassenach in charge?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 11:27, Reply)

he's a Celtic man
simple
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 12:25, Reply)

Eh up!
I got in early and nabbed the seat on the counter where they can't see my screen.
You might have me around this morning...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:31, Reply)

OH YEAAAHHHH
Good morrow, young lady.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:32, Reply)

Morning mister
How ya diddlin?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:32, Reply)

I'm grand, thank you.
I made a reasonable fist of cleaning my flat last night so I feel slightly less like a homeless who breaks into derelict houses to kip in at night.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:39, Reply)

My flat is currently acceptable too
I love it. I hate it when the housework looms.
Gawd, let's stop with the Brenda and Audrey. Remember when you were a moaning old drug-addled cunt and I was a drunken hooer???
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:41, Reply)

Those were the days.

( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:45, Reply)

Don't worry.
I'm still a fucking mess with a bad temper and a short nmusical fuse.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:46, Reply)

I'm going to say a word to you and see what happens...
Waterboys.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:47, Reply)

My best mate
was asked to tour the world with them (on bass) for a remarkably large amount of money.

He said no because they were 'boring cunts'. You'd never guess that from their records, would you?

Oh no.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 10:02, Reply)

Whereas I've been listening to their 80s stuff all week
You'd never guess from my other choices would you?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 10:04, Reply)

Is it
your birthday Monty? Cleaning the flat, I don't know......
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 14:44, Reply)

I start immediatly, get all the important stuff out of the way, eat my porridge and then faff on here all day.

( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:32, Reply)

Do you have any Ready Brek?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:33, Reply)

No I has grown up porridge.
Ready brek is for poofs.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:34, Reply)

It's for me face!
I'll bring my own then.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:35, Reply)

Haha!
I'm sure your face is lovely even with a little redness here and there.
( girlinthehole, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:35, Reply)

My face loves that Ready Brek feeling though.
All cooling.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:38, Reply)

Start with a smoke
then a coffee, check a few comic news sites, read wrestling news then start lurking on here and wait for the calls to come in. God damn my work life is exciting!
(Pirate Monkey is not the goddamn Batman, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:38, Reply)

Sounds not dissimilar to my day
Except my bloody work firewall won't let me get XKCD so I have to make do with BBC Sport
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 9:52, Reply)

It sounds like we all have a nice little ritual
Normally I take the stairs up to my office as it's the closest thing I'm going to get to exercise all day.

Then turn the computer on, and since it takes a fucking age to boot up these days, I disappear over to the kitchen area to wash my coffee mug and fill my water bottle.

Then sit down and swear at the computer under my breath, usually in the form of a request for information pertaining to its current activity and involving the word 'fuck.'

Boot up Thunderbird and delete any vaguely important-looking emails.

Boot up Pidgin and see who's online.

Boot up Firefox to check other email accounts, including the gazzes that I rarely receive.

Consider work. What was I supposed to do today? Bugger me, I'm sleepy. Better make a cup of coffee first. Or possibly have a wank.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 2 Mar 2010, 10:34, Reply)