food tred
I've just had a lovely salad with spinach, chikins, and loads of other stuff that isn't really worth mentioning. Other than feta. Lovely lovely feta.

How do you like your salad?
Tossed?
Not me, I like mine cut up and stirred gently. Like my bodies. Phwoar.

Alt q: if you were approached by a tourist in your home town what would you tell them they need to see?
I'd say you'd need to see the Belle Boyd cottage because it used to harbor an OMGspy.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:06, 100 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

The road heading away from my town and south to Edinburgh

( djtrialprice, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:08, Reply)

Almost exactly this, except North

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:16, Reply)

It's nice to visit every now and then but
I'm glad I escaped. Did you manage to bone your ex on Friday then?
( djtrialprice, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:32, Reply)

That's a horrible way to put it!
Yes.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:35, Reply)

down with this sort of thing

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:43, Reply)

Careful now!

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:55, Reply)

DOWN WITH THE SLEEPING WITH THE EX
yeah I said it
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:04, Reply)

I know, maybe wasn't clever
It was very nice though.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:06, Reply)

at least it was nice!

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:10, Reply)

She's a very sweet lady
But that was the last time, her decision more than mine sadly.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:15, Reply)

oh complications!
I hate them.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:16, Reply)

Yeah, this makes it simpler
And time I moved on. *mans the fuck up*
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:20, Reply)

I totally manned the fuck up today too
*manning the fuck up fives*
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:22, Reply)

*fives back*
I feel good for manning up. Now I've got the first of three mega birthday piss ups in a row this weekend. Might as well, only 30 once!
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:24, Reply)

I've decided not to drink. Instead of drinking I'm going to work out.
So I say now.
I'll probably be drunk by 6
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:28, Reply)

I was going to point out that it's half seven now
D'oh! *facepalms*

I always like to reward a nice workout with an even nicer beer.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:32, Reply)

smothered in some sort of cheese (feta or goat or parmesan ftw) and nuts
and dressing. always with the dressing. it is possible, with sufficient effort, to make a salad have more calories than a big mac.

my home town i would tell them to go and laugh at the tangerine tinted tarts trying to pick up footballers. in london...... the walk over waterloo bridge at night. most romantic of all the walks.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:19, Reply)

but it tastes soooooooooooo much better than a big mac
surprisingly no one hangs out around our town anymore
when I was growing up the cool places to chill were the carwash parking lot, taco bell parking lot and farmer jack parking lot
can you imagine how amazing that was
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:27, Reply)

whereabouts in the states are you?
i feel like i should know this but i don't!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:40, Reply)

Virginia

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:42, Reply)

i have been there!
v v pretty. and the men have sexy accents. you have done well.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:47, Reply)

didn't really have a choice in the matter
and I guess cause I live here I don't recognise an accent
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:04, Reply)

My actual home town is Nottingham
and everyone knows what they want to visit before they come to Nottingham, so I'd be wasting my breath. I would, however, tell them where not to go - Forest Fields, St Anns, The Meadows - because they shoot you there.

As regards Norwich, there's some beautiful walks and some areas where the locals are more sparse than others, but watch out for tractors and pitchforks fucking everywhere
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:52, Reply)

I used to go to Nottingham to visit the Gypsum mines.
Fuck, are they dusty.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:48, Reply)

Are they still there?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:11, Reply)

British Gypsum are still based there.
East Leake and Barrow upon Soar, and even Gotham.

I used to design their process heating systems. Even on the surface the dust in your teeth was apalling.I used to take a toothbrush with me.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:27, Reply)

I would love that

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:29, Reply)

You like getting dusty?
There are huge trucks driving around underground. Its very weird.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:31, Reply)

I think I have a deficiency
I have dreams I'm eating marble, alabaster, gypsum, the White Cliffs of Dover, sometimes whole, sometimes all dusty. It's why I love Sherbet Fountains.
Also, my favourite flower is gypsophila (means love of chalk or gypsum), my great aunty Valerie said I am made of alabaster and my mother has a severe calcium deficiency.
All these things seem to have a nice connection.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:43, Reply)

I wish I knew you when I was younger
How far would you go for a bag of plaster?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:45, Reply)

Ha!
I'm not the Sharon Bott of dust!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:56, Reply)

I notice that Sharon Bott represents the underclass of England
Are you sure she was not based on yourself?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:35, Reply)

There are some similarities...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:02, Reply)

These places.
www.friendsofoakwellhall.org.uk/
www.bronte-country.com/redhse.html

Granted, the first one's in/near a different town (Birstall) but all the towns round here are so close together it hardly matters.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 18:55, Reply)

oooooooooh Red House looks lovely

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:11, Reply)

if you get stuck in crewe station
just stay there, you are missing nothing.

I like chip salad
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:23, Reply)

What dressing do you have on your chip salad?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:51, Reply)

vinegar
and polyfilla
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:00, Reply)

I suspected as much.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:20, Reply)

In my home town I would recomend they see an optician.
Then they should jump on a number 61 bus and go to Dunstable.
They have an enormous sugarloaf in the shape of an enormous sugarloaf.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:47, Reply)

yay for going to Dunstaple

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:58, Reply)

Its the new Las Vegas.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:20, Reply)

Exeter Cathedral
www.google.co.uk/images?hl=en&q=exeter+cathedral&um=1&ie=UTF-8&source=univ&ei=3gYhTJyAAoyy0gTyxeHhDw&sa=X&oi=image_result_group&ct=title&resnum=5&ved=0CE8QsAQwBA

or the underground passages
www.juicygeography.co.uk/Princesshay/photos/passage.jpg
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:55, Reply)

or this place
maps.google.co.uk/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=Bridford,+Exeter&sll=50.726023,-3.542156&sspn=0.032274,0.090895&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Bridford,+Exeter,+Devon,+United+Kingdom&ll=50.643746,-3.685613&spn=0.016274,0.045447&t=h&z=15&layer=c&cbll=50.641964,-3.68875&panoid=PCdoThtqWT3FZS6nwHr2Fg&cbp=12,336.86,,0,5
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:57, Reply)

Have you got owt that does owt?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:12, Reply)

oooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhh *sighs*
that's lovely
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:06, Reply)

I would like to explore your passages.
Fnarr fnarr
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:23, Reply)

I like that the URL has both the word
'juicy' and 'passages'
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:26, Reply)

It tempts you, then delivers a hole in the ground.
Big caves and mines are cool though, not the type where you have a million tons of rock balanced on your head.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:30, Reply)

I read that as big caves and minges

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:33, Reply)

I like minges almost as much as caves.
So long as they are not as old as caves.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:37, Reply)

I misread that as 'calves'
and assumed you had some sort of weird bovine fetish
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:02, Reply)

They do have big longing eyes
Just so hard to resist.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:30, Reply)

Yeah
I love sticking my cock in veal
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:38, Reply)

And farm friendly now
So its not cruel anymore.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:39, Reply)

I like it more when it's cruel
you can taste the bitterness of the animal welfare institute
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:42, Reply)

Only a couple of things to see in Guildford
but it is sometimes quite fun to walk up to St Martha's Hill, look west and laugh at Woking.

/snob blog.
( Kroney, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 19:56, Reply)

OHMIGOD
That's near me, we should totally get together and have a mutual-masturbating mini bash
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:57, Reply)

that's so fucking sexy I just puked on my shoes

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:01, Reply)

I think that now
you have to fuck a goose
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:01, Reply)

Is this in some sort of rule book I know nothing about?
typical!
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:05, Reply)

Nope
it's just that the other day I said that I'd shit in my shoes and rape a duck if K2k6's post didn't get onto the popular page.

I assumed that puking in yours would naturally lead to Goose-rape, such is the manner of things
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:11, Reply)

now now, I didn't puke in them
I puked on them.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:18, Reply)

Ah, I see
you should have taken them off first, it's like standing in warm vegetable soup
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:23, Reply)

oh eurgh

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:26, Reply)

I hope you kept to your side of the bargain.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:32, Reply)

Disappointingly, the post got on the popular page
so I fist-fucked a stoat instead
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:37, Reply)

A poor substitute.
I clicked until I got cramp.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:38, Reply)

Then it's YOUR fault
if you hadn't clicked, right now you'd all be staring at photos of me, guts deep in a mallard, wearing shit-filled shoes
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:43, Reply)

Damn, another mis-read post
I thought you were going to do these things if it got on the popular page. Apologies to everybody.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:13, Reply)

Ah, Guildford, famous for Ford Prefect pretending to come from near there
And a castle where nothing happened.
Some nice places to go for a walk though.
I am also from around there, can't really think of anywhere to point a tourist, maybe dapdune wharf, or just to the train into London.

Oxford on the other hand has a ton, loads of museums, all the various colleges, and punting.

Our college even had a tourist visit once. He was lost.
( Tedium Alduce me to interlow myself., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:24, Reply)

OHMIGOD
Three-way-mutual-masturbation-mini-bash!
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:25, Reply)

I went to a college near guildford for an interview
they didn't employ me. Also I bought some Magic cards there once.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:50, Reply)

At Guildford Games + Comics (Or Avatar ages ago)?
That shop's closed now *sadface*, was a great place for geekdom.
( Tedium Alduce me to interlow myself., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:22, Reply)

I'm just up the road from Stratford
Which is a nice place albeit obsessed with Shakespeare.

Oh, and I don't suppose anyone on this board would be interested in Cadbury World. Or Tolkien's house.

When I have salad I substitute spinach for lettuce - 5 times as nutritious and much tastier. Woo!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 20:53, Reply)

I hate lettuce, it's pointless, it's all water and blah.
Spinach ftw!

I have no comment on anything else in your post.
Sad, really.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:04, Reply)

chocolate and fantasy
best things ever
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:23, Reply)

I like salad kept away from my real food because it contaminates it with its saladyness.
I live in London, so if they don't know why they should come here, then they can fuck off.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:30, Reply)

WELL THEN
Now I know not to visit that london.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:32, Reply)

It really is the best city in the world

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:36, Reply)

I'm not going until Girls Aloud go on tour again. Dammit.

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:38, Reply)

Yaaaaay!
Can I come? I want the orange irish one, Cheryl Cole can go fuck herself
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:41, Reply)

I quite like Sarah Harding

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:06, Reply)

ing

Yeah, she's ok. I just wish that she'd grow her hair back
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:07, Reply)

I got my hair cut like hers. I hadn't cut my hair in 2-1/2 years, saw hers and was like oooh want

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:08, Reply)

Each to their own
but I've still got my special kit for giving the irish one a bit of forced penetration
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:10, Reply)

Nope, I'm too old to understand that.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:41, Reply)

Make it so, I wants me some Kristine over here.

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:42, Reply)

you just want to take pictures of me making out with Lampito

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:54, Reply)

Dear god no.

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:00, Reply)

She'd like it too much.

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:05, Reply)

She hasn't been around since her night of passion, has she?
I hope she's not embarrassed or anything
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:37, Reply)

why would she?
it was all a laugh
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 23:06, Reply)

best most feculent, pus-ridden, diseased, crime-ridden, polluted

HTH!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:00, Reply)

You're thinking of Reading

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:09, Reply)

It's a fair cop
I have to go on a course there next month. Ugh.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:17, Reply)

With these attributes, it still manages to be the best.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 22:10, Reply)

Hmm
I like my salad with chicken.

Alt Q: I don't really have a hometown. But universityw ise, based on today go punting!
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 21:42, Reply)

I was slightly depressed
When I realised that the answer would probably be "The really, really old house".

We also have a 750 year old church, and the oldest ----- Monastery in the country...
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 23:44, Reply)

You are Shakin' Stevens AICMFP

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 8:34, Reply)

Alt Q:
'some puppies'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 23:51, Reply)