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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Titles
What titles do hold/have you held, or could you reasonably lay claim to?

Me:
Currently, "Best Potato Masher In Our House"
Formerly: "Longest Undetected Linear Garden Hop Down Our Street 1976" (held jointly with my mate Gary.)
"Hull & District Under 8's Swearing Champion 1972 & 1973"

Obviously not everyone's are going to be as impressive as mine, but don't let that stop you from posting them.
(Cave Duck, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:22, 249 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
Best Lady Whistler in Liverpool

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:29, Reply)

d Whistler
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:33, Reply)
I hold the regional title for that

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:36, Reply)
Heh heh. Fast, cheap, and dirty.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:37, Reply)
That should be on the famly crest.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:42, Reply)
That's Hobbes for the 21st century.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:49, Reply)
You're Too Young To Rememer That, Surely?
I've held that since 2007
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:32, Reply)
I've just added stupidiest person on here to my titles.
As I was looking at this thinking "but who is he addresssing the question to, what event is he on about,is there a post I can't see? Before eventually realising that that was the title.
(Cave Duck, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:41, Reply)
'Oldest B3tan'
And before any of yez does the strikeout thingy with 'Oldest' for 'Dullest' - there are others more deserving. You know who I mean.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:32, Reply)
but he's in Glastonbury

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:32, Reply)
Then, he cannot be old nor dull.

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:34, Reply)
no, Glasto isn't at all filled with old dull wannabe hippies

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:53, Reply)
Of course not
Only the coolest of the coolest go there. The only reason I'm not there is because I don't have more holidays.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:05, Reply)
The only reason I'm not there
is because Psychochump is.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Is he too cool for you?
Maybe if you go together with your other you, your combined cool factor will be enough to be allowed to talk with him.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:19, Reply)
- and dreaming of you. Or the other one.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:35, Reply)
@ Kitty
Don't you love not having an identity here and being always interchanged with "the other one"?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:38, Reply)
It's not too bad, means we can double team people when they insult one or other of us
*cough* Larry *cough*
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:54, Reply)
You and Applebite for Destruction
Are going to double team Larry?
Lucky sod.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:57, Reply)
i'm liking the use of Applebite for Destruction already

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:58, Reply)
Me too.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:01, Reply)
I choose you Applebite!
*Applebite uses Destruction*
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:20, Reply)
Like that Indian Godess
Only with less arms.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:22, Reply)
I suppose it has it's advantages
But I rather be myself and fight for my own!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:59, Reply)
Fucking yeah.
Don't mess with us, ok?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:02, Reply)
Just wait til we get doubles shit going on the pole
We can lay the smackdown.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:19, Reply)
Oh yes mate.
No one will mess with us then.

I ordered mine last night *excites*
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:21, Reply)
*jealouses*
My teacher said she's going to have a play on a spinning pole and then give us some lessons, I'm well excited, although the spinny poles are really fucking hard.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:59, Reply)
How old is oldest?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:33, Reply)
For you, anything above 19.

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:34, Reply)
Ha Ha.
I'm 22!
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:36, Reply)
Old! You are old!

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:37, Reply)
Ah - 22, The memories!

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:39, Reply)
But if you can remember being 22
then I may be challenging you for oldest B3ta poster, Larry.
(Cave Duck, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:43, Reply)
Born in the year
Nineteen hun'erd and fifty two.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:47, Reply)
My!
Did the world exist back then?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:49, Reply)
Freshly dried out from the flood.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:50, Reply)
Your even older than me.
And Porkylips too.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:53, Reply)
combined

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:55, Reply)
If only.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:55, Reply)
Right. So I'll be treated with appropriate respect in future then.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:59, Reply)
I had no idea you were such an old bastard...

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:01, Reply)
I like to think I bring a certain balance to the board.
Just as I lose my own.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:04, Reply)
a noble cause
I salute you
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:05, Reply)
Not a chance grandad.
Edit: I see you are not a member of the oldies club, so I reckon you're only 15 or someink.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:03, Reply)
Hi dad.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:50, Reply)
Who's that? Come into the light where I can see you better.
one of my Dad jokes - when the kids call 'Dad' I answer "who's that?". Every time. When I remember to.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:56, Reply)
when my sister or I phones my dad
we both say "it's me" so he waits until we've been talking for a while and said something that reveals which one we are and then goes "oh it's you, hello dear".
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:21, Reply)
You see, that 'Hello dear' not 'Hello Kitty' shows he still isn't sure.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)
Memory Like An Elephant Champion 2010 - Mr Larry Vest

(Cave Duck, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:50, Reply)

memory hung
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:51, Reply)
That, we'll have to see.

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:53, Reply)
wooooooooooooo

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:55, Reply)
Rather hopeful of you, young lady.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:57, Reply)
Hopeful?
It's just scientific interest. Nothing else.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:07, Reply)
Ain't that the truth.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)
The truth will be unveiled
And we'll all see it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:41, Reply)
I had never thought of this, but I suppose:
Formerly: Best singer and guitarrist player in my school.
Currently: Best thinker of great ideas too lazy to put them in practice.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:36, Reply)
And best Spanish person on B3ta, don't forget that.

(Cave Duck, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:38, Reply)
Thank you very much
It's an honour to receive this tittle.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:49, Reply)
Any prizes for modesty?

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:38, Reply)
I don't think I'd say no :)
But none of the titles are unmodest. You should have heard us singing at school. It wasn't very good, and I was the choir leader. And for the other one, I'm calling myself lazy.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:48, Reply)
You realise you've set yourself up to duet with Roota?

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:53, Reply)
GET IN!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:04, Reply)
Really?
I'm too shy, and I know not songs in English (you might have noticed how I by-pass all the music related questions)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:07, Reply)
also because they're boring.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:21, Reply)
I'm glad you say so
I thought it was only me.

5 lucky b3tans are getting a CD full of Spanish songs (and 3 in English and 1 in Japanese)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:24, Reply)
At work I'm The Rabble Rouser
Which I'm not particularly pleased with, it's not like I'm some stuck up union rep threatening management with strike action, I just like to draw attention to problems and injustices in the workplace. Ok, once I did try to form a standing army, but that was only a joke. Kinda.
As for on here? No idea.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:45, Reply)
You are
Most Lovely, maybe even a little bit too lovely if that's possible which I think it just may be, On B3ta 2010.

I'm going for "Most ridiculously long and fairly pointless, going in to tangents halfway through, did you see that tv show the other day about the really small girl?, thread starter 2010
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:23, Reply)
Most Appropriate Use Of Ian Dury Lyrics On The Internet - 2010

(Cave Duck, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:47, Reply)
Yorkshire's Best Plumper-Upper of Pillows 1998 (Runner Up)

(Cave Duck, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:52, Reply)
"lousiest drunk"

(I helped save b3ta! whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:54, Reply)
Is that current or former, Finn?

(Cave Duck, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:00, Reply)
Tipton St John Primary School 50m Skipping Race Champion 1990-1991

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 12:54, Reply)
that's not at all gay

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:00, Reply)
I was 10 (or possibly younger)
and there were 5 people in my year at primary school.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:01, Reply)
So that's 4 kids behind you, pissing themselves laughing.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:05, Reply)
you forget that they were also primary school children on sports day
and were engaged in trying to win the above title.

3 of them were girls so really they should have been better at skipping.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:08, Reply)
I forget a lot of things.
The girls probably coulda beat ya - just wanted to watch that boy skip.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:12, Reply)
probably
I was king of the school after all

(by virtue of being the oldest boy by all of 3 days, and being the only boy in my year not a freakish inbred midget)
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:15, Reply)
being the only 24 year old
in primary school would explain all those things. They weren't midgets, they were normal sized children
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:20, Reply)
why 24?
if I was 24 in 1990 or 91 that would make me 44 now
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:40, Reply)
I think I was just
being generally insulting
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:47, Reply)
You bastard
You had me laughing in the middle of the office.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:08, Reply)
2009 second runner up of 'Battle of the bingo wings' at my local gym.
Only B3tan to have gained her hostess badge from the Girl Guides. This should come as good news for all those travelling up this weekend.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:01, Reply)
Formerly: Queen of the Paedos
for my penchant for deflowering 15 year old boys.
Currently: Hilarious Drunk, Least Dark Member of the Dark Trio, B3ta Bicycle
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:01, Reply)
Dark Trio?
Explanation, please.
Edit: And now I have "Paedo Queen, young and sweet, barely turned fifteen" stuck in my head.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:03, Reply)
It's a tragically sad EMOWANK thing
don't encourage her.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:04, Reply)
It does sound a bit LOLTwilight, doesn't it?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:06, Reply)
Why am I now an emo?
fuck off, you painted bumder.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:11, Reply)
my two best friends
we're like Charlie's Angels, except we piss in alleys and vom in cups.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:09, Reply)
You sound like horrific human beings

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:11, Reply)
I don't want to hand around with people like this anymore

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:12, Reply)
We have done some bad things.
I think only Crow has met one of them, but they're fantastic people.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:13, Reply)
I used to deflower guys, as well
But they were usually around 25-30. Very sad. I didn't do it knowingly, but for 10 years of my life it seems I could only pull virgins :(
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:10, Reply)
How many b3tans is it now?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)
Most under achieving student in middlesex 1964 to 1976
Most annoying employee in the field of electrical engineering 1977 to 2010.
Owner of the dustiest flat in Luton 1988 to 2010 (excluding dead tenants).
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:02, Reply)
Fastest breast stroker of all the local schools 1988 and 1989

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:03, Reply)
I like mine stroked slowly.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:05, Reply)
What a coincidence.

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:08, Reply)
You too?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Best band EVAH!

(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:13, Reply)
Did the girls line up?

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:06, Reply)
That's no challenge.
He could have just run along the line with one hand out.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:09, Reply)
If the girls were anything like Amberl
I wouldn't have wanted to insult them by only using one hand at a time.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:11, Reply)
Next time al sees a line of women
This is what he'll do.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:11, Reply)
I'm going to have to avoid bus stops

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:13, Reply)
If you do it in slow motion
I'll stand behind you humming "Chariots of Fire".
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:14, Reply)
love the name change.

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:14, Reply)
Ta very much

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:16, Reply)
I might change mine to Appetite
really confuse them.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:22, Reply)
If you did that
then RapeyChomp will have a spontaneous orgasm in a field in Glastonbury
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:25, Reply)
Haha! Do it.
Larry's head might implode with the confusion of trying to work out which one of us he's meant to be insulting.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:27, Reply)
A4D / KoH . I know who you are. And which one is which.
And I have never insulted either of you. Except the skinny bint.
(I helped save b3ta! Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:36, Reply)
But did you do any swimming?

(Cave Duck, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:06, Reply)
it wasn't until you posted this that I considered he could have meant anything other than stroking breasts....

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:08, Reply)
You filthy pervert

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:09, Reply)
No, I was too busy with sex and drugs and rock and roll

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:09, Reply)
hit anyone with anything?

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:09, Reply)
I had a stick for a while
I used to be able to keep pretty good time with it.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:10, Reply)

sex and drugs and rock and roll homework and twisting his dreads.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:10, Reply)
This was pre dreadlocks

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:11, Reply)
I think you should grow them again.
It would make you interesting.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:13, Reply)
I'm doing a sadface right now
that really hurt.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:14, Reply)
*punches on arm in matey fashion*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:19, Reply)
YOU HAD DREADLOCKS?
POIDH.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:15, Reply)
If only there was a way you could look at photos of me.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:15, Reply)
I keep almost typing the name of the person i want to stalk into the status box instead of the search box on facebook
this is not good
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:17, Reply)
haha I bet that looks well creepy

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:29, Reply)
I haven't actually done it fully yet
but it is only a matter of time...
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:30, Reply)
holy shit
you did have full-on dreads!
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:18, Reply)
Wasn't he cute : )

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:19, Reply)
What the hell?!
You can see the pics but I can't? OUTRAGE!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:19, Reply)
I thought the same
but click on his profile pic and there is one in there

lamentably, he still looks better than I did with long hair
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:21, Reply)
Your FB profile has hidden photos from me :(
*sadface*

Edit: Have seen the dreads pic now. Impressive!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:18, Reply)
It shouldn't be

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:21, Reply)
I couldn't see a Pics of Al thing
But was forgetting the Profile pics.
Here's a pic of my dreads
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:24, Reply)
You look like a girl

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:25, Reply)
Really? A fucking ugly girl
Not here though
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:27, Reply)
I think I've shagged her....

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:29, Reply)
You still look like a girl.
I know a lot of ugly people.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:29, Reply)
Your face looks like a girl
YEAH
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)
I've seen her face and you're right
it looks totally girly.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:36, Reply)
I should bloody well hope so.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)
he meant like a whole girl
your face looks like a whole person, with limbs sticking out of it
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:38, Reply)
I was going to be mean
But couldn't bring myself to do it.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:38, Reply)
do it.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:58, Reply)
I've totally seen you at InFest

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:30, Reply)
Here I am at InFest many moons ago
Here
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)
It appears that access to your friends breasts would be severely restricted by the metal cage
I think you should inform her that this is going to hamper my attempts at stroking while I run past.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)
She gets them out often enough
So you'll have no hardship there.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:34, Reply)
I'll dig out my pic of me looking like a hippy when you get here.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:36, Reply)
WOOO!

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)
blue, nice
no dreads, but long hair

and for some reason a witches hat...
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:27, Reply)
You look like a girl

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:28, Reply)
Oh. Right
This is a new thing of yours. Like "Who sang this?" for Rapey.
Good luck with it.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:29, Reply)
Nope, genuinely looks like a girl.
Or meatloaf.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:30, Reply)
YES! Meatloaf
that's who it reminded me of.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)
In my youth I did not take well to being called Meatloaf
in hindsight, cutting my hair and losing some weight would have been sensible.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)
Nice, but I prefer the mohawk.
It makes you look well ard.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)
I prefer the mo too
More manly
*doesn't want to admit that Applebite was kinda right and I looked a little girly*
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:34, Reply)
The mo is definitely a better look to be rocking.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:35, Reply)
*disappears to facebook*

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:19, Reply)
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Please grow them back. Please.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:20, Reply)
Laziest person at Oxford 2009
also strongest contender for 2010

Also second best consumer of Kettlechips
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:12, Reply)
Best Breasts in Oxford 2010
and strong contender for fastest gin drinker.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Your breasts aren't that great, Al.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:16, Reply)
It's true

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:17, Reply)
It didn't help
that I had taken double pain meds that night to cope with any walking that needed to be done, so was already pretty gone on that
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:18, Reply)
Pain meds make your breasts bigger?
That's fucking awesome.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:21, Reply)
indeed it is
an unusual side affect to be sure
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:25, Reply)
I'll get this out of the way before anyone accuses... but with my own (accurate) twist
Gayest man to be having regular sex with a woman more beautiful than most humans have ever met on B3ta

Also:
Best hung person in my place of residence
DJ of most successful alternative night in East Anglia
Human punching bag du jour
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:15, Reply)
I suspect George Michael held this title once.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)
d'an

(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:35, Reply)
Warden of the Marches.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Best taker of MASSIVE DRUGS on off topic

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:16, Reply)
A lofty accolade if ever I heard one.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:25, Reply)
I suspect not only off topic but the whole of the internet.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:29, Reply)
Mainly the Goose Step.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:18, Reply)
I'm not good enough at anything to have a title.
Except when we play 'Most likely'. I fucking hate that game.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)
I think you probably win
best skinny emo boy shagger 2010

and

most likely to show her breasts to strangers 2009-2010
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:35, Reply)
Shame you weren't a stranger, eh al?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:36, Reply)
Yeah, all he got was a bit of thigh.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:39, Reply)
I have a feeling that was enough

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:40, Reply)
When the tents a rocking, don't come a knocking

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:41, Reply)
But then it got really cold and he gave me a hoodie
Which I wrapped around my legs, so he didn't even get that.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)
But he got the hoody back?
Did he clutch it to his face, inhale deeply, his leg twitching like a shitting dog?
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)
Yep.
And the chair I was sat in.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:48, Reply)
He's proper wrong that one

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:50, Reply)
Yes and No
I have enough problems with feeling guilty without having to deal with looking at a young girls breasts.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:40, Reply)
At the end of the day,
I AM 10 years younger than you, you old fart.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:53, Reply)
Exactly
It's one thing to talk about it, but the reality is just a bit creepy. Much like Rapey.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:55, Reply)
Don't put yourself down.
You'll never be that bad
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:05, Reply)
Actually, it's more like 2006 - 2010.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)
Hottest B3tan I've Seen In Their Underwear
I don't think Amberl stripped off :(
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)
You're lucky
she might have had someones eye out
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:40, Reply)
they're not that big
it's not I'm like Jordan. People just think they're big because I'm not a massive fatty, just a half-hearted one
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)
I like this description.
I'm a half-hearted fatty too.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:51, Reply)
Amberl really does have big boobs
However much she likes to protest.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:55, Reply)
due to a lack of competition
No3L is top of my hottest B3tan I've seen in their underwear list.

*sadfaces*
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:41, Reply)
I'm the hottest b3tan I've seen in undies
*even sadderer face*
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:42, Reply)
shit, I just basically said that I'm not as hot as No3L....

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:42, Reply)
You didn't think that through

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)
Or that you're so fat that you've never actually seen your own underwear

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)
I've never been that fat fortunately

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)
Ha!

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)
Haha!
In one blow you complimented her, then said "Yeah, but Amber's hotter".
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:41, Reply)
Amber has got much much bigger tits.
So I don't mind.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:42, Reply)
*goes to happy place*

(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:42, Reply)
to be honest
I think I've said this twice. But I would 100% swap my tits for her legs. Obviously not in exchange of place, but just generally
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)
Haha!
Leg tits! Someone photoshop this.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)
I was going to Paint Smash it
But thought AmberI might not appreciate having a pic of her on here.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)
do it anyway
bert paintmashed a pic of him and hitlercock jizzing over my mrs and that didn't bother me
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)
go for it
just don't use a hideously ugly photo
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:59, Reply)
*debates being mean or not*
hmmm.....
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:03, Reply)
you're just going to say
all my photos are ugly. I've heard it before :P
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:05, Reply)
*pouts*
you're no fun
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)
There are NO decent pics of Applebite for Destruction's legs
None that fit a pic of AmberI anyway. And no profile (as in, side on) pics of AmberI either, so can't use the pole dancing pics...

I shall persevere.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)
Yes there are, go further back.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:15, Reply)
Eh, it'll do, wasted too much time already

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:18, Reply)
Foot fetishists on the web explode!

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:21, Reply)
You said you'd switch with me too
so that means we'd have to have a breast each whilst you got four legs. Not a fair deal Amberl The Centaur!
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)
MONOBOOBS

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:57, Reply)
haha!
I'd swap with either of you to be honest, because you both have great legs and I don't. Maybe you could do a boob-share between you? Like a time-share but better
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:00, Reply)
Tits aren't everything
Roseanne Barr has bigger tits that you.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)
Everyone has bigger tits than me.
Al probably has bigger tits than me.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)
Woe is you

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:46, Reply)
Nah, I love it.
According to a random survey done by my friends at Download, my breasts are the perfect size.

Sadly, I have a feeling many of the people they asked just wanted to get into my knickers.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:52, Reply)
I can't believe people would lie about breasts just to get into a 19 year old girls underwear.
I'm shocked at the state of humanity.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)
Outrageous, isn't it?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)
Part of the survey involved them copping a feel.
So it is highly likely they were all lying.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:57, Reply)
I like the scientific approach

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:59, Reply)
They probably did
I haven't met you, so can't comment, but my lady's are actually perfect. Best breasts I've ever seen in the flesh.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)
I think there may be some kind of bias
because I'd say the same of those belonging to my mrs.

although, not my ex. hers were too big :-/
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)
I think there is some bias, but still my point stands firm
Too big is never good, but better than barely-gropable.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:57, Reply)
I'd agree with that

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:59, Reply)
I don't think I do.
We can meassure them if you want.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:46, Reply)
A challenger eh?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:51, Reply)
Pfff
You have clearly not met me yet. I'm never defeated!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:06, Reply)
Oh Yes!
Get in! :D
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)
yes, I would like to get in... To your pants.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:01, Reply)
smoooth

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:01, Reply)
Well, it's not the worse chat up line I've been on the receiving end of.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:04, Reply)
true
it's not the worst by any means
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)
I think I changed my shirt
you just missed it haha
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)
I feel bad for Lampito now.
EDIT - Hang on, what the fuck is that "lol" doing at the end of that post? WE ARE NOT A HOME TO SHIT LIKE THAT.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:48, Reply)
I'm so glad it wasn't just me who thought this
I was barely able to contain myself.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)
I wanted you to spasm
and twitch uncontrollably as you cried
Edit I'll edit if it'll make you feel better
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:50, Reply)
I was voted most likely to fail at being a lesbian.
Edit - and a heterosexual.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 23 Jun 2010, 13:47, Reply)

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