Lost and found
I lost my ipod back in June, 80gb nearly full. I lost it about the same time the pc itunes was on died and couldn't be fixed. I was just about resigned to the fact I would have to shell out a significant chunk of my savings to repopulate my new itunes and phone as I have no clue about illegal downloading. When this morning my old man rings me asking if I had left him a 'gadget dooda' in his car. The plucky old bastard found my ipod. What have you lost and found?

Alt Q: what have you lost and never found?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 9:48, 192 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Anyone who pays for tunes on iTunes they have already bought
is a moron.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 9:49, Reply)

they have already bought
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:06, Reply)

on iTunes
( Kroney, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:08, Reply)

or a law-abiding citizen
who doesn't want to see the music industry collapse, bereft of its diamond encrusted limousines?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:09, Reply)

Poor old Metallica.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:10, Reply)

The thing with Metallica
is that they are already outrageously rich. Those cunts.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:22, Reply)

Quite honestly
I really dont give a shit.

I'm happy to buy CDs straight off bands who have paid in order to have them pressed and whatnot. I'm happy to support bands. I am not happy to support the music industry. Adapt to survive. Bands have in the past proved themselves capable of starting their own record labels.

Frankly, I find the argument that you should pay the music industry because the musicians don't have an alternative to be utterly farcical.

Edited for idiotic spelling.
( Kroney, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:15, Reply)

Does that apply to publishing books too?
you think that all authors should just find the money to print their own books and negotiate contracts with bookshops?

There's a big flaw in your argument, because while bands can release their music without a record company, they will struggle to promote it. Or tour.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:19, Reply)

It will do as eBooks become more popular
at the moment the cost of printing is prohibitive.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:21, Reply)

still doesn't deal with the promotion part of it.
Still doesn't handle touring for music.

/also, as an aside, eBooks are not going to do for books what mp3s did to music, because too many of us simply don't like reading things not written on paper.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:23, Reply)

i hate the very idea of ebooks
they are really offensive. books are one of the most tangible pleasures in life - you can spend hours in a bookshop browsing and choosing, and they are lovely things to have around the house. (although i may have a few too many for a flat). also they would make my eyes feel funny, it's bad enough staring at a computer at work all day.

ban the e-books.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:28, Reply)

books
vinyl
/same argument, you can't stop progress swipe
(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:33, Reply)

this is regression
not progression
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:39, Reply)

Whats wrong with writing on the cave walls anyway?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:44, Reply)

how is it regression?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:47, Reply)

Me too.
I can't imagine ever using an e-book. I love the smell of old books too.
( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:44, Reply)

k t
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:45, Reply)

because i say so
keep up, vipros!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:50, Reply)

*wrong post is posted wrong*
( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:51, Reply)

at least I can reply in the right place ;-)

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:51, Reply)

She's going to tipex it off now
because editing is too regressive.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:54, Reply)

my first ever mistake
and i get pilloried to the point of flouncing...

bgb - shame on you, i thought we were friends, how could you.

vipros - you used a smiley. thus you are below contempt and your opinion is dead to me.

psychochomp - overall generally below contempt and should be dead anyway.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:04, Reply)

first ever mistake?
I suspect not.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:06, Reply)

sad but depressingly true
first mistake on here, then.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:11, Reply)

That was your first mistake.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:11, Reply)

this post makes no sense?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:12, Reply)

That was your second mistake

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:14, Reply)

it does
and it's amusing
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:15, Reply)

don't encourage him to think he's funny
it's much more amusing when he has to explain himself.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:19, Reply)

I reckon they will, sooner or later, especially as the technology improves.
Some reasons they haven't taken off yet - competing formats, DRM, readers being expensive. If I could get an e-book reader I can read on a night bus without too much concern that I'm going to get mugged for it, I'd have one already.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:29, Reply)

I wasn't that bothered about them
Until they brought out iBooks. I loaded it up for a browse, found the quality and readability of the free book (Winnie the Pooh) to be excellent, so thought I'd by some ebooks for my holiday.

The iBooks store were charging 17 quid for a Charles Stross book, same again for Christopher Brookmyre, both of which I bought new as paperbacks for about 3 quid each on Amazon...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

I just read the girl with the dragon tatoo, for free.
It was advertised, slightly annoying popup which you had to click about twice a chapter. It didn't bother me that much though.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:35, Reply)

tattoo

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:38, Reply)

It's the swedish spelling.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:40, Reply)

did you read it in Swedish?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:57, Reply)

Of course.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:05, Reply)

the iAd framework has so much potential, to do what AdWords did for webpages, only for Apps.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:48, Reply)

With the greatest respect
this is the wrong place to gauge opinion. this is a website of, what, 100,000 mostly geeks? (not meant negatively, it just is)

It's not going to happen in the real world. Too many people LIKE books. I'll 'fess up if it turns out I'm wrong, but I doubt it.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:34, Reply)

it's 10,000 with 10 log ons each.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:36, Reply)

I LIKE books, I doubt I'll ever stop buying them,
but I would certainly use an e-book reader as well, if only to save on luggage space on holidays and such.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:41, Reply)

that's my view
I intend to try one out when I get the chance, but even if I got one it wouldn't stop me wanting to own as many books as possible.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:46, Reply)

that's the only reason I'd consider it.
But it would have to cost about £25 for me to risk it in my luggage.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:47, Reply)

Promotion of a books is a strange one
because it's so dependant on word of mouth. It depends what you want though, you're obviously not going to ever have the big blockbuster 20,000 in a day sales that large scale promotion wants and in fact needs to sustain itself. There's nothing wrong with pushing for a gradual increase of sales through submitting it for reviews in blogs/newspapers/magazines/book clubs.

To your aside, I think it's going to head towards eBooks in just the same way as mp3's have. The kindle etc are actually quite nice to read from, nothing like a normal screen, and the iPad has to make a difference to the market. It's just going to take some time.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

http://www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post864674

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:36, Reply)

www.guardian.co.uk/books/2010/jul/20/amazon-ebook-digital-sales-hardbacks-us
(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:39, Reply)

So? No-one buys hardbacks.
Also, "Amazon in being completely honest about sales figures and not massaging them"* yeah right. Have you met my good friend Lord Lucan?

*/I've got to go and lecture now so I don't have time to look, but I'm willing to bet you £20 right now that what Amazon have done is they've compared book titles directly for those figures. i.e the number of eBooks of "dragon tattoo" vs number of hardbacks of "dragon tattoo". Which will be about 11, as it's been out in paperback for years. It's not lying, but it's massively misleading. There's no way they've just added up "total eBooks" and "total hardbacks"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:46, Reply)

I'll check the fiqures and get back to you.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:48, Reply)

I think the biggest problem with the iBook store is that it's not really any cheaper to buy a phsyical book over an eBook.... but you have to outlay £400-500 for the reading equipment.
However, Kindla have an store I've not tried where the prices are quite a bit lower.

Where these devices come into their own though, is with law and medical students, and to a lesser extent every other student or academic, who have to carry around huge books.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:47, Reply)

This.
I am a huge book reader, but can't "read" a book on a screen. It just doesn't have the same feel or ease as printed paper.

I'm probably all of TEH WRONG and old fashioned, but to that I say... meh.
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:55, Reply)

I read an awful lot too
have read a whole book on CRT screen before and it was awful. I'd need to have a week to see how I got on with an ereader I think
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:57, Reply)

If a viable alternative came along
and the publishing companies banded together to try to hang on to the more profitable past rather than trying to work out how to use the technology to their own benefit, then certainly.

The music industry essentially tried to destroy a new form of technology because they a) couldn't work out how to harness it properly and b) had got used to keeping the vast share of record sales money for their own profits.

If mp3s and internet mean anything, it means that bands can release music, accept payment and film gigs for internet release completely without a music labels input. I'm not against paying for music at all.
( Kroney, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:24, Reply)

That is true.
But where I suspect we differ is that I don't regard failure to adapt or the music companies failings as reason to download illegally.

I do disagree a fair bit about music companies input. Without some input, we'd spend our lives searching through utter utter dross to find even capable musicians, let alone something we liked. I don't have that time. There needs to be some form of weeding of dross. I'll happily pay just for that. How many 16-18 year old idiots did you know who thought they would be the next big thing when they could barely hold a guitar the right way up, for instance?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

a lot of those idiots are in the charts

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:33, Reply)

"The charts" are hardly the only thing that music companies promote.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:35, Reply)

I am aware of that
but I was pointing that a lot of shit comes down through the music companies anyway.

I'm not disagreeing with you. I gig quite a bit and am all too aware of how many shit bands are around who think they are the bollocks. Not us though, we know we're shit.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:38, Reply)

Aye, and I'm not disagreeing that the music industry needs a kick up the bracket.
watch out though for the fine line between "shit because it isn't my taste" and "actually shit because they have no musical talent" - a lot of chart stuff is former rather than latter
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:41, Reply)

that is a fine line
there are a lot of fuckers with very little musical ability around though.

The main reason I hate U2 so much is because their more recent songs sound like they have been written by children.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:45, Reply)

Very different thing.
The overhead in publishing tends to go on stuff like editing, without which the product would likely be rubbish. Hence why e-books cost about the same as hard copies - the actual production costs of a dead-tree book are trivial. Quite a lot of self-published e-books are turning up these days, but they're rarely good (more here).
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:25, Reply)

The collapse of the old order
is the best thing to ever have happened to the music industry, in my opinion.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:19, Reply)

there's an excellent video of Dick Dale offering advice to young bands about self-promotion and stuff

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:23, Reply)

And a great article/interview with Trent Reznor
Regarding his breaking away from the music industry in order to release music on the Internet, and what new bands can do to get their music out there.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:34, Reply)

people can learn a lot from the likes of Dick and Trent
I think they should form a duo
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:35, Reply)

Trent's too busy making music with his immensely hot wife
I think Trent summed it up nicely by saying that if you want to be in a band to get rich and famous, sign with a record label. If you want to make the best music you can and share it with others, the Internet is your friend.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:39, Reply)

hard to get rich and famous these days.
I don't even care if anyone hears my music, I just like making it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:41, Reply)

You have musical integrity
Countless thousands don't ;)
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:50, Reply)

not sure it's integrity.
realism perhaps.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:53, Reply)

if you got rid of the music industry
there'd be a lot of unemployed people. i'd rather give the cash to warner than the dole Q!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:21, Reply)

That
is were you and I suffer a difference of opinion.
( Kroney, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:25, Reply)

This is why when I go to ASDA or Marks'n'Sparks, I walk out with my trolly, fucking fucks trying to charge me when they're already rich.
They should give me shit for free 'cus they got more money than me.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:30, Reply)

Ah now here I disagree.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:10, Reply)

I don't even know where to begin downloading stuff for free
and then getting that file on my iphone? zero chance of me being able to do that without tuition.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:12, Reply)

I have no idea and care even less.
Vinyl and me will always be the dearest of friends.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:16, Reply)

Vinyl is good for certain albums or when you just want to listen to one thing but ipod, amp and huge
speakers is quick and convenient.

I only have 11 records on vinyl. Not a lot.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:21, Reply)

Also, vinyl at parties gets ruined by cunts.
see also: cunts that think just because they are 1200s they are fitted with needles that allow you to try and "scratch"
cunts that think it's really funny to pour vodka into the vents of a running power amp
cunts that discover bass ports on missions are exactly the right size to shove sausages up (actually that was quite funny)

Actually, turns out I know a lot of cunts.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:27, Reply)

everything at parties gets ruined by cunts

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

I lost my heart to a starship trooper......

(Pirate Monkey is not the goddamn Batman, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 9:50, Reply)

Flashing lights in outer space?

( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 9:51, Reply)

I've lost my mojo : (

( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 9:52, Reply)

Here you go

(Cave Duck, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 9:57, Reply)

It's OK mate, seriously, if you want to eat loads of sweets, it's nobody's buisness but your own, you go right ahead.
Here, how's this for an idea, big fella, you could make one of your collarge art thinggies with the wrappers ! Here's some prick-stick and some cardboard, knock yourself out, really express whatever you want. And don't worry, dispite what I think, I shall always be proud of you.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:03, Reply)

Thanks, your continued support is invaluable to me.
In other news we had apple pie made from our home grown apples last night.
(Cave Duck, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:07, Reply)

Haha, good man !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:16, Reply)

My dignity

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 9:58, Reply)

So who did you have sex with then?

( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:09, Reply)

Sex? I'm a male b3tan!

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:10, Reply)

Yeah, 'with yourself' doesn't count.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:11, Reply)

Even though I'm convinced every night it feels a little bit more like the way I imagine Christina Hendricks' clopper might...

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:12, Reply)

Frothing?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:24, Reply)

Erm...dry and slightly calloused
Edit: Is it possible to froth at the wrists?
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:28, Reply)

*sands down notches on bedpost*

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:28, Reply)

Tell me about it
My bedpost looks like a stepladder built by the Borrowers
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:30, Reply)

Why, where's it gone?

(berk, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:10, Reply)

If I knew that, I'd be able to find it, wouldn't I?

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:11, Reply)

Pedant.
Have you tried down the back of the sofa? Perhaps a better question would be 'why has it gone?'.
How was your gig?
(berk, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:12, Reply)

Gig?
Shit, was I supposed to be playing a gig last night?
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:13, Reply)

Didn't you have to carry a big bass amp someplace?
I assumed that meant giggage...
(berk, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:15, Reply)

Oh, sorry, with you now.
I was moving the amp up to the pub in advance. Gig's not until Thursday, but I managed my delivery on the train and my back, arms and floppy wrists have all lived to teapot another day.

Just got confused as there was the possibility I would have also been playing last night with a different band, but the drummer pulled out on Sunday. Even if my dignity hasn't really gone, my sense of self-organisation disappeared long ago...
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:16, Reply)

Good grief, man
how many bands are you in?
(berk, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:18, Reply)

Erm...
*counts*
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:19, Reply)

Between 3 and 6, depending on whether you count those that aren't doing anything at the moment

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:20, Reply)

Talented git
Do you play bass in all of those or other stuff too?
(berk, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:21, Reply)

Bass guitar in 5 of them
Acoustic guitar in the 6th.

It's not so much 'talented' as 'in demand due to choosing an instrument that fewer people want to play.'
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:23, Reply)

our bass player seems to get all the attention
in spite of him being a mildly retarded ginger scotsman.

I don't know what it is about my band, whether it is just us or not, but people seem to think it is fine to try and hold conversations with us while we are in the middle of playing a song. Or that every time we finish one shouting "bass solo!" or something similar is a nice way of showing your appreciation.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:25, Reply)

Well, obviously everybody loves a good bass solo
Except the feller who runs the blues jam I go to. But I'll eventually teach him otherwsie.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:30, Reply)

I like a good bass solo as much as the next man
in fact, probably more so, but it is fairly disheartening when all your audience does is shout for them, rather than acknowledge that you've just finished a song as a band.

It'd make me slightly happier if people asked for more guitar solos, but I don't think I could fit any more in.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

There comes a point where you have to just tell the crowd to fuck off
Give him a song with a dedicated bass solo in it, then when they beg for another you can say he's already had one and that will be all, thank you very much.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:36, Reply)

he plays like Flea on a double bass for the most part
the whole set is a bass solo!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:40, Reply)

So why's my triangle career stalled so badly?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:26, Reply)

You've got to learn how to use the other two sides of it.

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:28, Reply)

Fuck that shit.
I just want the GLORY AND FAME
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:38, Reply)

I believe Gene Simmons took the same approach to music
(And yet has still achieved far greater glory and fame than me to date...)
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:42, Reply)

I hate that cunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:05, Reply)

He is an unbelievable cunt
Or 'CUNT' as the fans insist on spelling it.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:27, Reply)

If he could do that he'd be promoted to bass.

(Cave Duck, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:42, Reply)

BAND SLAAAAAG!

( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:24, Reply)

It's true
I am a complete and utter basswhore at the moment.
Edit: Though if it makes you think any better of my musical whoring, I am still playing with that Sensational Alex Harvey Band Tribute Band
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:28, Reply)

b

too easy
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

As am I at the moment, it would seem.

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:34, Reply)

*rapturous applause*
BASS SOLO!
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:37, Reply)

*obliges*
www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcYdqCUM5bg
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:39, Reply)

Excellent

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:39, Reply)

my ability to ejaculate more than twice in 24 hours.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:00, Reply)

virginity?
before anyone else says it.

i am forever remembering songs from ages ago, looking at the jumbled mass of about 500 CD's that are all in the wrong boxes anyway, thinking "fuck it" and dowloading them from i-tunes.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:02, Reply)

I didn't lose mine
I had it forcibly removed from me.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:03, Reply)

I'm playing a new game where evertime you mention that you owe me a fiver
So far you owe me 30 quid.

I don't take cheques
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:08, Reply)

I'm playing a game where everytime you are a cunt you owe me a penny
You owe me 86 trillion pounds.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:19, Reply)

*checks pockets*
I'm a bit shy at the moment... can I pay you in hugs?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:22, Reply)

Yes you can

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:23, Reply)

huhzar

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:23, Reply)

I keep losing and finding my health
I'm crap today again. If I didn't know that it's important that I finish what I'm doing, I'd have stayed at home today. Buf.

I don't usually lose things, as I'm quite organised.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:05, Reply)

My faith in the human race.
Cheers, 'life'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:07, Reply)

Lost loads of things
but the good thing about that is you're given a pleasant surprise when you find them again.

I used to run across a few banknotes stashed inside particular books, from where I'd hidden them and forgotten about them
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:08, Reply)

Bloody hell
that's an excellent idea, I'm going to start doing that whenever I have spare notes.
(berk, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:11, Reply)

it caused me a lot of grief
as a child. I'd get present-money, and either spend it like water or fold it into a book and lose it
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:12, Reply)

Did you see that, over there in the corner?
That was me losing my religion.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:08, Reply)

religion anal virginity to a 20-stone Turk.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:09, Reply)

sometimes monty
the inside of your head is a dark and twisted place, mein lieb.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:10, Reply)

I just reckon he's pyschic
he doesn't even know what he's saying is the truth
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:12, Reply)

he's one of those mental prophets
he doesn't live in a flat, he lives at the top of a pole in the desert
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:21, Reply)

It's true.
Costs me a fortune in cabs after the pub.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:23, Reply)

don't worry about the money
worry about the fact that your subconscious mind is choosing to home in on poor DrTugnut's ordeal
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:26, Reply)

ordeal arse.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:31, Reply)

Not as dark and twisted as my ringpiece after that massive turk bummed me.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:12, Reply)

Officelolz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:13, Reply)

Sometimes?
You besmirch my goodly name!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:12, Reply)

apologies
i did not mean to imply that you are a blot on your family's escutcheon.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:16, Reply)

Fabulous word there.
*bows with a flourish*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:21, Reply)

i try!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:26, Reply)

you couldn't miss it
what with the squealing.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:15, Reply)

Customer service
Lenovo are now saying that things like RAID cards and hard drives are now customer replaceable parts. They think it's reasonable for recruitment consultants to be opening desktops, laptops and servers in order to replace parts.

Most of these people are incapable of switching their computers on in the morning without having their hands held by us.
( Kroney, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:12, Reply)

My wedding ring.
Although, that proved irrelevant shortly afterwards.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:14, Reply)

I recently, for lack of a better term, lost the will to live
I don't mean I wanted to die, there was just so many times I just thought of how much easier it would be to not wake up the next day. This has been going on for a couple of months now, but there's light at the end of the tunnel.

I'm moving back into my parents, for 2-3 months. That will give me time to pay off debts, overdrafts, etc, and give me a fresh start. I hope.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:22, Reply)

eeeeeeeemmmmmmmmmmmmmooooooooooooooo

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:23, Reply)

Supportive as ever, haha
I think you owe Labs another penny
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:27, Reply)

Only if I'm a cunt to him
it's free to insult you
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

He's not that specific

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:33, Reply)

Not in the post but I have been emailed the exact T&Cs
so bad luck fuckface
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:36, Reply)

Shit.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:37, Reply)

'moving back into my parents'
has produced uncomfortable images in my brain. I'm doing the same before moving to Wales. It's a bit of a nightmare to be honest but you will love the cash injection.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:26, Reply)

Get your head down for a nap
We'll wake you in two and a bit weeks.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:26, Reply)

*bullying, sneering laugh*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:28, Reply)

Fuck off Bert.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

My musical innocence
after watching this www.youtube.com/watch?v=N8F5YSA1Oz0
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:27, Reply)

Oh good god, why would you bother?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:28, Reply)

I just wanted you to know there are always
depths below where you're at.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:30, Reply)

Charming.
Give this a listen, it's my favourite track of the minute, pretty damn ace.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

I like this :D
Favourited
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:34, Reply)

Is it Al's song?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=MAO95Q5IiYY

For those without sound it starts along the lines of
The first love of my life, was not a girl it was my bike
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:38, Reply)

Haha, sounds good, shall have a listen later
Nah, it's a strange combo of irish music and bhangra, cracking tune.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:48, Reply)

I've no sound at work, thank God.
Al first alerted me to these oafs but I have still not dared give them a listen. They sound GRATE.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:29, Reply)

They are wonderful
Band of the millenium.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:30, Reply)

Righto.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:46, Reply)

God! I hate young people.

( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:32, Reply)

But we all love you!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:33, Reply)

How low is this threshold?

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:35, Reply)

There are exceptions.
But not many.
( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:38, Reply)

I'll assume
I like fuck ups and mothers.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:44, Reply)

But you are a young people.
And raather attractive to boot.
*Terry-Thomases*
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:40, Reply)

You're just another guy with low standards : )
But thanks anyway.
( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:43, Reply)

There's nothing wrong with men having low standards

(berk, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:46, Reply)

It would be nice to be flattered by someone with high standards though.

( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:48, Reply)

you're never going to see that happen
unless you stop assuming that everyone who compliments you has low standards.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:53, Reply)

It doesn't matter anymore.
Besides, my mummy says I'm beautiful : )
( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:56, Reply)

that's the main thing.
my mrs refuses to accept that she is gorgeous, despite being told repeatedly, not just by me either.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:02, Reply)

I think you're awesome

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:05, Reply)

You too : )
Although I think you're at your best when taking the piss out of Lab.
( girlinthehole, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 11:07, Reply)

Wife says no matter how tall you are she's going to totally nut you in the kneecaps.
THAT'S how low my standards are. Snort.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:48, Reply)

What the calamitous shuddering fuck?
I want to do unspeakable atrocities to them.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:37, Reply)

Slap some NIN on, go to your happy place

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:51, Reply)

UR Darth Foxtrot AICMFP

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:59, Reply)

Bastard.
I'd forgotten about that. Luckily I'm a quick rememberer when prodded.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:39, Reply)

I love it.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 Sep 2010, 10:42, Reply)