haha seconded
One person I went out, said it after three months and there was nothing I could say at all. Especially since he was levelheaded enough that I'd never thought he would
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:27, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Why did you go out with someone for three months if you weren't into them?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:29, Reply)

because women are psycho hosebeasts

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:29, Reply)

"he paid for meals"

(PsychoChomp, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:31, Reply)

probably worryingly accurate

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:31, Reply)

not if you are the higher earner
you feel guilty and like a moocher if you don't pay.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:40, Reply)

I'm totally gonna let you pay for dinner when we go out, don't you worry.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:44, Reply)

thanks al
you always know how to make me feel special
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:46, Reply)

He still respected her in the morning

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:32, Reply)

He had a nice car

(PsychoChomp, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:32, Reply)

he bought her nice things

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:34, Reply)

He had a penis so big that i could hide behind it in the event something really scary happened in a film.
Or use it as a weapon in a worst case sinario.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:38, Reply)

Alright Gonz,
What's the latest on the job front?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:39, Reply)

I liked him a lot
he was a great friend, he was okay looking. That doesn't mean I'm going to claim to be in love with him, just because he said it to me.

Also fuck off with 'he paid for meals' no-one can afford the amount I eat
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:40, Reply)

first time mrs v said it to me
was her birthday, she was really drunk on gin and was crying because I had started smoking pot again*.

That was a great experience.

I no longer let her drink gin.

*at least, that was the one reason that came out in a way that could be understood. I imagine there were other reasons.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:29, Reply)

I totally pictured your Mrs as Fran from Black Books then

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:31, Reply)

she is not dissimilar to fran from black books

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:32, Reply)

Oh god I love her now
can we be a thruple?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:32, Reply)

I'll look into it

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:34, Reply)

looks or personality?
cause either why you are prob onto a winner.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:33, Reply)

bit of both
less skinny and less crazy
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:33, Reply)

Nice touch I am resigned to ending up with a women who
will be nothing less than a Manny/Bernard hybrid.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:36, Reply)

I got lucky I think
mrs V is just my type.

she could only be better if she could skin up.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:37, Reply)

I've tried to do that a few times
my nails get in the way though and it's always baggy in the middle.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:43, Reply)

the skin on mrs v's fingers is too slippery
you may have seen wiggy blow on, or lick then dry his fingers to get more purchase on the papers?

sometimes your skin will get smooth or slippery for some reason and you can't roll the paper properly. mrs v is like that all the time
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:45, Reply)

Get her to wear rubber gloves
hehe
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:56, Reply)

that would be weird

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:57, Reply)

The trick to this is not to lick your fingers
Can cause to paper complications. Instead one should gently rub the finger tips behind ones ears or in the crease when you bend your arm. Picks up enough dead skin, oils, whatever to give instant purchase back on the paper.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:58, Reply)

I find that gently exhaling on my fingertips works for me

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:00, Reply)

I just tried that in the office. It's nice.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:03, Reply)

you are a strange man

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:06, Reply)

I am a man with no shame

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:07, Reply)

shame penis
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:12, Reply)

I was expeting clue or friends
but see you even do better than me on that!
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:14, Reply)

can't be helped
try not to swell my already over-inflated ego
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:19, Reply)

Having seen a photo
in the dim and distant past, Mrs V is my type, too. If you and Kitty run off together, let me know and I'll see what I can do to soften the blow.

/creepy
( Kroney, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:45, Reply)

I'm afraid Roota has dibs

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:46, Reply)

Damn that randy scouser
I'm not softening any djtrialprice blows.
( Kroney, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:50, Reply)

you say that now

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:54, Reply)

If?
IF?!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:57, Reply)

I'm still not convinced by your level of commitment

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:02, Reply)

How about if I get a penguin tattoo?

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:07, Reply)

perhaps

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:08, Reply)

I tried to make Wiggy give up pot
he tried to make me give up coffee.

We've reached an agreement.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:32, Reply)

she tried to make me give up pot
in return I got her to start again.

I WIN!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:34, Reply)

That is a win for all stoners everywhere.
You are Howard Marks AICMFP
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:35, Reply)

based on results
one of my best skills is getting people to smoke pot.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:38, Reply)

Vipros
I'm a little worried to be honest that you may turn out to be a nicer/cooler/more successful/interesting/happy version of me.

You could at least live in Trinidad or something not fecking Exeter.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:40, Reply)

I apologise if this does turn out to be the case
and will happily share a spliff with you to commiserate.

I'm going to be in Bristol tomorrow, but unfortunately am getting the train there, going to the thing I have to go to, then getting the train back immediately afterwards.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:42, Reply)

Am now planning some sort of life switch which involves the real you being locked in a coal shed at T
Templemeads and me squeezing into your clothes, growing 4 inches (wahey) and getting back to a house in Exeter.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:45, Reply)

I think we'd all prefer it if that didn't happen

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:59, Reply)

agreed

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:03, Reply)

dealer.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:37, Reply)

pusher thanks

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:37, Reply)

I was going to say that but it sounded a bit harsh

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:42, Reply)

One guy in my A-level biology class I barely even spoke to confessed his "burning love" for me
That was horrific.

One of the reasons why I got rid of the puppy was because after TWO DATES he asked me if we could "be in a relationship" and that he wanted to "do his best" for me. blegh.

Cunt-ex said I love you after three months as well, and possibly thrown off track by my horrified and disgusted face then made it worse by saying "I wanted to say it two months ago, but I thought it would make you run away" TOO FUCKING RIGHT MATE.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:38, Reply)

if he didn't ask you then he wouldn't know when it was ok to update his facebook status
give him a break!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:40, Reply)

After two dates?
That's a strike out, right there.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:43, Reply)

After two dates
The girl's still someone hot who is stupid enough to talk to me, not a girlfriend.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:45, Reply)

He was a virgin, bless his little cotton socks.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:48, Reply)

I bet he would ask if you were ok
Constantly during sex.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:51, Reply)

Some of us have to do that.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:57, Reply)

Some of us don't care

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:59, Reply)

There's a rapist joke here,
But I can't be bothered to make it.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:05, Reply)

It was a boast about the size of my penis.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:06, Reply)

it was subtle
I would not have been able to guess that was what you were saying
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:08, Reply)

that's because
you suspect it's more of a lie than a boast.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:13, Reply)

I assumed it's because the women he sleeps with are usually crying

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:16, Reply)

Or gagged...

(Miraclefish How appropriate, you fight like a cow, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:40, Reply)

I got rid of him before I had the chance to de-virginise him.
Probably a good thing. I don't cope very well with virgins.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:04, Reply)

"Burning love"
sounds like something you'd need to get tested for.
( Kroney, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:41, Reply)

At the start of our relationship Wiggy and I used to say meloveyoulongtime
and then one day he said "loveyou" and I looked a bit frightened and said "you forgot to say longtime" and he said "yeah I know.....is that ok?". It was pretty sweet.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:42, Reply)

your life is an Indie movie.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:43, Reply)

I bet she has a burger phone

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:46, Reply)

A shit indy movie
where none of the characters are likeable.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:46, Reply)

Isn't that all of them?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:51, Reply)

I liked Napolean Dynamite.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:53, Reply)

it's a great film

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:58, Reply)

Agreed

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:59, Reply)

There was, recently, heavy internet talk
of a sequel/prequel being commissioned. I think that would be a bad idea. First one was good but not excellent.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:00, Reply)

it would be a bad idea
and I think the first is great
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:02, Reply)

oi!
stop being horrible when I'm being so nice.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:58, Reply)

I thought you meant Indiana Jones then.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:49, Reply)

I have thought about her with a whip before

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 15:56, Reply)