*sits around waiting for a new thread to come along that I can join in without reading a load of stuff*
Oh look, here's one now !

In less than 2 days, I've made the most awesome thing I've ever made; on the internet. It'll be up online tonight for testing, and has made me lol a few times.

I don't think I got last week's job, but they said they want to keep me on as a freelance, so I'll have to see. Never mind, I got another tomorow I think.

So, erm, what's the point of YOU ?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 16:59, 107 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Me?
Fucked if I know Gonz, old boy.
( Kroney, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:01, Reply)

I'm not discussing my 'point' in public thank you.

(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:01, Reply)

What is it?
Good luck in your interview tomorrow gonz, and I hope you get good news about the one last week.

The point of me? To get my tits out in public.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:02, Reply)

*awaits the pandatron*

(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:03, Reply)

Everyone's used to it now.
It won't even cause a ripple.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:04, Reply)

I've retired him, it was getting old
AA gets him out ever now and again though, maybe he'll oblige.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:04, Reply)

I still have him bookmarked as well, although you really have to earn it these days.
You, Chompy and Vippers have raised the level of background pandering to unprecedented heights.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:07, Reply)

You mean by being nice to women?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:08, Reply)

Oooh and Monty, he's a terrible one since he got his end away.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:09, Reply)

True
"Ooo, women can all fuck off, except my daughter! Fie, I say, FIE!"
*explicit scene with semi-anonymous b3tan*
"Ladies are lovely and soft and gentle and should be loved by all!"
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:12, Reply)

beautiful
you should make a comic strip

the first scene can involve him squatting over something

and so can the second
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:15, Reply)

those corgis are real ladies

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:21, Reply)

It is rather sickening, isn't it?
I shall try to stop this forthwith.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:21, Reply)

No, I like this New You
It makes me feel vastly superior.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:22, Reply)

It's only a passing phase.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:30, Reply)

keep it up
it's puzzling people
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:31, Reply)

I really don't think I can.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:37, Reply)

Sorry for the delay, been a little busy

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:21, Reply)

Still, nicely executed.

A+ Would summon again.
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:26, Reply)

It's not online yet, but it's lolgutted.com
You can basicly search for things like "my dog died" or anything really, and it'll go through Facebook searching for pictures/statuses/videos/links(etc) for that. You can then rank them up/down as "LOLGutted" or "*Yawn* Borring". It'll also link you to them so you can 'like' their post directly. There us a top/bottom 10 of each one too, so you can find the most lolgutted person. There is commenting on the whole lot too.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:07, Reply)

That sounds brilliant gonz
I shall check it out when it is.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:10, Reply)

That sounds pretty cool, Gonz.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:10, Reply)

Yeah.
I like it.
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:12, Reply)

Will it automagically scrape public status'?
Or will it be user submitted? Or both?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:13, Reply)

Uses the FB API to get the data =)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:18, Reply)

This better be in the fucking newsletter on Friday, gonz.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:16, Reply)

Innit.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:22, Reply)

I love this idea
I was lolgutted-ing so hard at the search Chompy brought up with OMG LAD.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:19, Reply)

That was me.
I think. his was "beutiful children"
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:19, Reply)

sorry
it was awesome
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:28, Reply)

Eh?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:22, Reply)

no idea

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:23, Reply)

wait a sec
youropenbook.org/?q=omg+lad&gender=any
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:28, Reply)

Christ
Now I have to find my axe.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:32, Reply)

Ooh I took a smug croissant photo on mah balcony when I was away
I'll get it uploaded and we can be smug together.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:33, Reply)

Dear Christ, I have been contaminated by terrible people.
Take them away.

Edit: the story about the boy with the broken back was quite moving though.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:34, Reply)

"omg. cant belev that my litl girl school haz be talin 2 cort becos therv got a 23 year old lad. posin as a 16 year old. wots gowin on with the schools thes day."

Why should she care what's going on with schools? Clearly she's never been to one.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:40, Reply)

Hahaha very good/true.
Apart from going there to post burgers through the railings to her likkl angles.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:45, Reply)

evening Monty

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:47, Reply)

there was one yesterday where a similar muvver
had written that it was unfair her little girl was being picked on by the school because a boy had called her a name so she had kicked him in the balls and now she was the one in trouble. The woman was shocked by this. Obviously none of it was spelled correctly or written eloquently.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:57, Reply)

come on Kitty don't you know
violence solves everything. Teach them young I say.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:00, Reply)

sounds funny
in a schadenfraude kind of way
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:18, Reply)

I have no point
beyond providing low-cut toppage to the world
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:07, Reply)

*salutes*

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:07, Reply)

A noble vocation, indeed.

( Kroney, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:10, Reply)

I'm something for women to ogle at, I suppose. I am yet to find another use for myself.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:08, Reply)

Drunk punch lunge fat lol

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:10, Reply)

Drink punch, lounge, fart, lol

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:17, Reply)

My rasion d'etre,
is that I am a substitute for a border collie.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:20, Reply)

You're nice but a bit dim
And you like to chase sheep?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:22, Reply)

Collies are super intelegent, much more than any other dog.
and I do have fondness for sheep.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:26, Reply)

baaaaaaaad boy!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:28, Reply)

They won't split on me, so I'm fine.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:29, Reply)

Collies are getting thicker.
I read it somewhere.
Pedigree ones anyway, because the breeders consider slim heads and therefore skulls to be more aesthetically pleasing, so they're breeding them with smaller and smaller heads, resulting in smaller brains and thicker dogs.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:29, Reply)

Gutted.
:(

When I die, my partner will have to get a dog as stupid as me then.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:31, Reply)

*Lol-gutted

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:35, Reply)

*applause*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:36, Reply)

Oi Monty,
Why are you going to Leighton Bastard?

I'm stuck in Slough, and your in Bedders.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:38, Reply)

My brother lives there.
I call it 'Leightant Homosexual' to upset him.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:40, Reply)

it call is?
really Monty!
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:42, Reply)

Yoda speak.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:43, Reply)

MOVE ALONG PLEASE, NOTHING TO SEE HERE

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:43, Reply)

haha
ninja edit though. Kudos.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:44, Reply)

I'll have to use that as well.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:42, Reply)

Not sure yet
who really is?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:25, Reply)

Don't leave it until they nail the lid down on you.
Try to make something of yourself now.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:27, Reply)

I am training to be a teacher but I feel I have a greater destiny involving super powers

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:28, Reply)

Like America or China
is Russia still one?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:32, Reply)

Your destiny is to become IGNORAMO-MAN

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:36, Reply)

I doubt I could become more ignorant in your eyes Monty
But I am looking forward to taking that flat off your hands.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:38, Reply)

Mmmm, devilled kidney.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:39, Reply)

I am going to spend the next 3 years
ruining it just for you. Is there room for a dialysis machine anywhere in your pad?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:42, Reply)

Mother of my kid only has 50% kidney function.
She'll be on dialysis within a few years apparently.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:43, Reply)

I have been told by doctors that one can
survive with only a quarter of an actual kidney. However it would be rubbish. I am lucky that the one I have is functioning well. For now anyway.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:45, Reply)

So the bitch could have years left in her? Curses!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:47, Reply)

yeah but they will be pain filled miserable years.
Gloat
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:49, Reply)

That they will - she'll end up blind and limbless, all being well.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:51, Reply)

Due to syphilis?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:54, Reply)

Was it a lucky punch?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:46, Reply)

She did the violence in our relationship :(

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 17:47, Reply)

wahey got a text back
blah blah you're a great friend but I dont think of you that way blah blah still in love with her blah blah was with her last night and she saw your text blah blah
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:01, Reply)

Men are cunts
trufax
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:02, Reply)

it was a GIRL
*facepalm*

should've broken my phone or something so I couldn't text
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:03, Reply)

oh dear

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:05, Reply)

just shoot me
put me out of my stupidity
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:06, Reply)

*shoots*
POW! POW!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:07, Reply)

How dare you shoot a lady
without at least groping her first
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:08, Reply)

come closer, I'm getting nothing here

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:14, Reply)

*shoots again*
Just making sure, I think I saw her move.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:17, Reply)

I wasn't aware you were that way inclined.
Fuck it we've all done it. Chin up. Make a booty call.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:07, Reply)

not typically, I quite like penis
see what happens when you take a chance?
bother!
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:11, Reply)

yeah it feels all horribly and swirly inside
Booty call will make you feel better.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:13, Reply)

i can have better sex by myself

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:14, Reply)

I am here to make everyone else look better
I suspect dried fruit is muesli's raisin d'etre
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:11, Reply)

The evening shift has arrived.
How do, rCRI?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:13, Reply)

not so bad
got a new phone, a cup of tea and a whole shelf to myself at work. (Edit: and my students' homework is to watch that Wilderness Downtown things)

how's you?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:14, Reply)

Tired, otherwise fine thanks.
Still at work for a little while, then home in the rain.

People keep trying to impinge on my shelf here. I have to keep moving their junk onto the bottom shelf.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:18, Reply)

i had no shelves, then I made an incursion onto the tea shelf
but then after massive upheavals more shelf space appeared. And lots of grumping from other people. But I get a shelf, now!

I suggest putting your name on the shelf or painting it with flowers or something, then noone will want to associate with it
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:21, Reply)

Wish I could, but they are all brand new and spotless.
My boss has even started a "no papers on the desk when you go home" policy in our brand new office. I hate it, and as he has gone to Denmark for a couple of days, my desk is a tip.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:24, Reply)

what?
that suck. Creativity comes from an untidy desk
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:32, Reply)

i dont even know what colour my desk is

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:34, Reply)

I have to share my desk
I think one day the person I share with will actually kill me. I might try and claim one that looks like it might be free soon
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:35, Reply)

Proof that Vipros is a time traveller

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:14, Reply)

He looks more like Bear Pookie

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:51, Reply)

True
Bearpookie has a wonderful pair of silver jeans.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:53, Reply)

You may be onto something there

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 19:35, Reply)

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 1 Oct 2010, 13:00, Reply)