Apparently
Roota's up the duff. I can't think of a more frightening combo than a bastard half scouse half jock hybrid. With that in mind then, what should we name the little blighter?

Alt Q: if you were to purge yourself away from facebook completely, taking all your lovely personal "content" with you, what would you miss most?
( djtrialprice, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:36, 108 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Nothing facebook sucks I never go on there anyway
and for stomping my thread I'm going to stomp you in the testicles
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:37, Reply)

someone told you that I love that?

( djtrialprice, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:55, Reply)

I'm her BFF, so Vipros or my real name
being able to perve on kitty look at people's photos.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:37, Reply)

:D

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:44, Reply)

I'd miss winding up middle age mothers on the Loose Women page.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:38, Reply)

I want 'in'.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:38, Reply)

Wee Jock
or possibly Marzipan


Alt Q: I'd miss being reminded when people's birthdays are.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:38, Reply)

The calendar on the front of my phone
has been shouting about someone's birthday tomorrow ;)
( djtrialprice, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:54, Reply)

sadly yes
I'm growing old
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:36, Reply)

Piston_Broke

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:39, Reply)

Jock Calmdown McLa has certain ring about it and is in no way promoting stereotypes.

(Cave Duck, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:40, Reply)

WINNER

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 14:10, Reply)

If it's a girl, Crowsephine, after me
If it's a boy...well, if "Phoenix" can be given as a name these days, call it Minotaur.

Alt Q: The endless stream of australopitheci losing control of their lower jaw before grunting "OMG! How are you not on Facebook?!?!"

Edit: Speaking of Facebook, is it just me or does creator/alleged plagiarist Mark Zuckerberg have an incredibly punchable face?
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:40, Reply)

Oor Woolie

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:40, Reply)

Dave, everyone needs a Dave in their life.
Alt Q: Writing passive aggressive abuse on my friends pages and stealing status updates from here and sickipedia. and the wire
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:41, Reply)

If it's a girl, Roota and if it's a boy. DJ. Obviously.
Alt q: stalking the ex.
( girlinthehole, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:45, Reply)

I would miss looking at whatever event I have created
seeing everyone write stuff like "this is going to be awesome!" and feeling popular.

I wouldn't miss much else to be honest, it's more annoying than it is useful or entertaining.

I told a pregnant woman at work what I would name my hypothetical child and she stole it and pretended she never heard me say it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:46, Reply)

Maybe you should steal her child in return

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:48, Reply)

it's ginger.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:51, Reply)

A doctor comes back into the delivery room
and says to the woman who's just given birth
"I'm afraid I've got some good news and some bad news"
"Give me the bad news doc" she says,
"I'm sorry to be the one who has to tell you this but your son was born ginger"
"oh.. that's awful, what's the good news?"
"He's dead"
(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:54, Reply)

You heartless bastard telling jokes like this.
And Roota up the duff and all.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:56, Reply)

You heartless bastard telling jokes like this.
And Roota up the duff and all.
lol
(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:57, Reply)

that's offensive.
My mum's ginger.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:11, Reply)

That IS offensive.
Poor you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:12, Reply)

I reckon if I have a kid it'll be ginger
I've got ginger skin.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:15, Reply)

My father grew a ginger beard once.
He had black hair all his life until he went silver.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:19, Reply)

that was interesting.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:23, Reply)

Upon reading that
This was all I could think of

Sorry for the shitness, I've only got Paint here!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:31, Reply)

I've only got Paint
I pull off masterpieces with it.
masterpieces myself in massive fits of ego-wankery
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:35, Reply)

and yet you wouldn't make me a badge
:( :(
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:41, Reply)

It's an awesome joke.
Your mum's shit.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:12, Reply)

that's not what, er, you said last night.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:15, Reply)

Even your stuttering jokes are shit.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:16, Reply)

Drunken facebook chat conversations with people I haven't spoken to in years.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:49, Reply)

people I haven't spoken to in years girls I want to rape
(Bazongaloid, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:55, Reply)

"So what are you wearing?"
"Oh, I'm just sitting in bed in my underwear."
"Don't lie to me. I can clearly see you're in the living room in a distinctly frumpy pair of pyjamas..."
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:57, Reply)

I'm going to fuck your fucking cunt off you twat

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:59, Reply)

Quote Inbetweeners much?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:10, Reply)

Only the once today.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:10, Reply)

Want a prize?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:19, Reply)

I want you to fuck off if that helps?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:23, Reply)

It helps make me sad

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:24, Reply)

If it's a girl, B3thany, or a boy, B3rtram
Insist on the 3 when you get the little bugger registered.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:52, Reply)

I love the name Bethany

(Bazongaloid, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:55, Reply)

you would, you creeper

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:08, Reply)

No one cares, Al.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:25, Reply)

you're not allowed numbers
did you not read about that couple who wanted to call their kid 4Real? They wouldn't allow the number so they called him Superman.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:13, Reply)

lol the poor

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:14, Reply)

lol you

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:18, Reply)

I just lol'd at that.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:22, Reply)

The law could be changed if we start an internet petition.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:24, Reply)

Name it Dixie
According to the blues, that's a boys name too!

Alt Q: There's a group on there called 'You Laugh, You Lose', full of stupid pictures. It keeps me amused, so I'd miss that. I'd also miss the updates from my friend in Singapore.

EDIT: And although I'm sure I'll be branded as gay or emo, I've already chosen what I want my eldest daughter to be called.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:55, Reply)

Yes, and get it a rebel tattoo too.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 12:57, Reply)

You laugh you lose is a 4chan thing.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:27, Reply)

Doesn't seem that shit

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:32, Reply)

Name it Bert PopeHaterIncestSex
Alt: Facebook? Fuck off.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:04, Reply)

I bet you are playing Farmville right now.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:05, Reply)

If that's a euphemism for 'fucking a goat', then yes.
Yes I am.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:10, Reply)

"Hello, my name is Monty Bo-o-o-o-yce"
Sounded far better in my head...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:13, Reply)

I really don't get this at all, old bean. Sorry.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:17, Reply)

I think it's meant to be a play on Baaaa
you know sheep, goats?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:19, Reply)

But why would the goat be
a) talking and
b) claiming to have the same name as me?

OR

Does one acquire the vocal characteristics of animals (or, specifically goats) by shagging them?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:23, Reply)

Stop applying logic to b3ta.
It does not become either of us.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:35, Reply)

I think it is a bleating sound.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:19, Reply)

It's meant to be a goat bleating
But I just couldn't get it quite right. I've basically just stolen a Stephen Lynch joke.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:20, Reply)

and my stuttering jokes are shit?

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:22, Reply)

I just wanted to see if you'd respond telling Chompy to shut it
It's happened a few times, and amused me greatly
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:27, Reply)

If I have the misfortune of ever having a child
I'm calling it "Rage", regardless of sex.

Alt Q: I'd miss having the lazy option of FB messaging someone who I couldn't be bothered to email or text.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:05, Reply)

I think the first name 'Precious' would be mildly entertaining with your RL surname

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:06, Reply)

Is his surname McKenzie?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:09, Reply)

or Matthews?

(Grange Hill reference)
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:11, Reply)

If I'm going to give my child a ghetto name
I'll go the whole hog and call it "Alopecia Rwanda Fo-Quee-Quee"
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:09, Reply)

I very nearly did a small wee, so hard have I 'lolled' at this.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:17, Reply)

Did you see that horrifically racist website linked the other day?
With the animated GIF of the black woman headbobbing? Picture that while saying the name.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:20, Reply)

Damn I missed that.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:25, Reply)

Just imagine a website devoted to ignorant, racist cunts of the highest order
Bellowing racial slurs and hatred like they're going out of fashion.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:29, Reply)

it's called chimps out
and it's one of the worst things I've seen on the internet.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:29, Reply)

that's a strong statement
considering the kind of porn I assume you watch
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:30, Reply)

I mean it,
I didn't think I could be shocked by the interwebz but it shocked me.
And stop thinking about me watching porn.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:32, Reply)

I was fairly aghast
but if you believe in freedom of opinion etc and an unregulated internet, you'll get that sort of thing. won't you?

It's full of 'yeah I went into a shop and there was one of them in there they have silly hair lol' isn't it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:35, Reply)

Yes, but I don't believe in the right to incite hatred.
I could live in a world where that shit was banned.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:37, Reply)

I couldn't
you fucking Nazi

/gets that in there early
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:42, Reply)

I wonder if the internet gives tthem some sort of release.
Would they be more inclined to lynch people if they couldn't fill the internet with their racist bile?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:44, Reply)

Oh I've been on that when Mabazritchie raised his simple head

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:34, Reply)

That's exactly what it was in reference to the other day too

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:34, Reply)

With a name like that it could be a wrestler.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:07, Reply)

just the distraction I suppose
you should name it roota djtrialprice shae elizabeth michelle settle the third
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:18, Reply)

I can't believe you're having a go at me like this DJTP
YOU'RE A DICK!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:19, Reply)

Hahahaha
What a bastard I am ;)
( djtrialprice, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:27, Reply)

Strange post is strange.

( girlinthehole, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:27, Reply)

Does she have Scouse and Jock parents?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:29, Reply)

(I'm referencing WBM's last spaz)

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:29, Reply)

Oh!

( girlinthehole, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:31, Reply)

I wish she'd come back, I could do with her paying my rent for a few months.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:33, Reply)

me too
my bastard tenants haven't paid me yet
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 14:48, Reply)

Ha that was brilliant
She blatently forgot what account she was signed in on and what signature she had,

Did we ever comfirm if Mrbigstuff was her?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:41, Reply)

No but it totally fucking was

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 14:13, Reply)

Emerson Stranglewank III
Genghis Fuckhands.

I'd miss freedom and the outside world and not being buggered on cell block 4, since abusing you lot is what probably prevents me going all "Falling Down" in real life.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:26, Reply)

So the child is half Scot and half Scouse?
Chances are it will go through adult life being called 'the accused'.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:41, Reply)

Wise words Tuggers.
I think we should all chip in to buy DJTP a vasectomy.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:46, Reply)

Maybe a charity single?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:53, Reply)

+ he shouldn't impregnate
single case
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 13:59, Reply)

And it will beat you up as soon as it can stand

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 14:15, Reply)

Rootaanddjtrialpriceschild's anagram name is JOLLIER, SHARP, CANDID DICTATOR
I have spoken.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 14:09, Reply)

I want to call it Spike

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 14:14, Reply)

as in what it dodged?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 14:17, Reply)

Hahah yes!
No, it will be named after my favourite tuatara. See, really, we don't want a baby, we want a tuatara.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 14:20, Reply)

Maddie, for a girl.
Baby P for a boy.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 8 Oct 2010, 14:46, Reply)