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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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New thread for girls.
Lets talk about boys and how horrid they are.

Lets face it, they are rather crap.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:00, 202 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
F5 works a lot slower up north I guess.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:01, Reply)
I saw their posts and wanted to do my own.
Just for shits and giggles.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:02, Reply)
i can agree
Though there are plenty of exceptions they're all nonsexual
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:02, Reply)
Nope! every last man Jack of them should be lined up against the wall and shot.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:03, Reply)
With your love gun

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:05, Reply)
There's nothing lovely about my weapon.
It's deadly.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:06, Reply)
it's certainly not unique to boys
it includes some men too.

but some are lovely, like my friend who sent me the nicest email about missing his wedding, phew!!!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:04, Reply)
It was a ruse to make you think he was lovely.
He'd rape you in an instant if he thought he could get away with it.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:05, Reply)
He already has
But she was unconscious at the time
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:06, Reply)
every man is a rape-machine
/lesbian seperatist
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:06, Reply)
yeah, we are constantly going equipped to rape

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:07, Reply)
I fucking hated those bus adverts

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:12, Reply)
Which ones?
I quite want a "WAKE UP TO RAPE" T-shirt.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:20, Reply)
The "Every man is a potential rapist" ones
I just don't see the need for the word 'Potential'
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:22, Reply)
I can't remember the exact wording, but the one that infuriated me the most said something like:
BAD NEWS! People get raped. A lot.
GOOD NEWS! There's a telephone helpline!

Really? That's enough, is it? That's going to make it all better?
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:25, Reply)
Wasn't the helpline just Chompy's mobile number?
That way, he could get sloppy seconds...
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:27, Reply)
Sneaky.
The "hair of the dog" approach to rape counselling.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:29, Reply)
hahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:32, Reply)
*applause*

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:32, Reply)
he wouldn't need to, he's gorgeous
and an exception to the ginger rule!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:07, Reply)
I'd like to point out that just because your experience is with crap ones
that not all of us are.

I, for example, am fucking awesome. I suspect there are others on here too.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:05, Reply)
You are crap by default of not being lovely to me.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:07, Reply)
relatively speaking, I am lovely to you

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:07, Reply)
Not lovely enough.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:08, Reply)
this weak logic has made your entire "boys are crap" argument look spurious

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:11, Reply)
Did I say it was logical?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:12, Reply)
if it isn't logical then it is irrelevant
admitting you know it is illogical makes it even worse
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:21, Reply)
I can live with it.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:22, Reply)
I'm afraid the rest of us can't allow that to happen
RELEASE THE VELOCIRAPTORS!
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:23, Reply)
What's he done now?

(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:06, Reply)
Who?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:07, Reply)
Whichever gentleman it is that's prompted this thread?

(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:10, Reply)
Just generally feeling unloved.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:11, Reply)
Well don't
it's nonsense and it's making you grumpy. Loads of people love you :)
(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:15, Reply)
Not in the biblical sense.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:16, Reply)
Perhaps, when I'm your age
I will think differently, but frankly I'd rather have a bunch of really good friends and a vibrator, than a boyfriend (or lack thereof) who makes me miserable.
(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:18, Reply)
So, you'd rather shag Michael J Fox?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:20, Reply)
This from a woman who is fighting them off with a shitty stick : D

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:21, Reply)
I'm really not!

(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:24, Reply)
So hot-bloke hasn't texted you this morning then?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:21, Reply)
Nope
Wasn't expecting him to. I shall text him on wednesday and see if he fancies seeing a film.
(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:25, Reply)
Oh yeah.
One of your *special* films to get him in the mood, eh?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:26, Reply)
I don't think they show those at the cinema...

(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:27, Reply)
Depends what cinema you use!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:33, Reply)
I don't think so somehow
sexy films just make me feel faintly embarrassed.
(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:36, Reply)
Sex scenes in films you're watching with parents are horrific

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:38, Reply)
Particularly if they're the stars of said film.

(Cave Duck, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:42, Reply)
hahaha!

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:43, Reply)
Oi! I said that.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:48, Reply)
Just after I did.

(Cave Duck, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:49, Reply)
Two great minds think alike.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:50, Reply)
But that contradicts the thread subject, surely?

(Cave Duck, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:51, Reply)
I said boys are crap.
Not boys are thick.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:52, Reply)
My apologies.

(Cave Duck, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:03, Reply)
Sex scenes with your parents in them are even more horrific.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:43, Reply)

Like so?
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:50, Reply)
Whereas girls are perfect yes?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:06, Reply)
Shouldn't you still be in bed?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:07, Reply)
No.
I need to get back to the land of the living and try and crack on.

I'm still coughing though.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:10, Reply)
I was talking of you drinking last night.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:13, Reply)
The drink doesn't normally hit me that hard
I exposed myself to a hangover having had a week of the ale. Thankfully, last night was my second consecutive night with alcohol, so I'm back to my fighting weight.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:17, Reply)
*puts on the gloves*
*ducks and weaves*
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:19, Reply)
How are you today Blousie?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:22, Reply)
More family trauma.
More hormonal urges.
More crap weather.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:24, Reply)
Do you live on Albert Square?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:24, Reply)
Nope!
Emmerdale.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:25, Reply)
I forgot you were northern.
Have a nice day calling everyone 'duck'.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:26, Reply)
That's Leicestershire, not Yorkshire.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:29, Reply)
And Derbyshire

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:31, Reply)
Snakes with tits Jeff, snakes with tits.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:09, Reply)
You are clearly a wise, wise man.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:11, Reply)
I'm fucking fantastic
As are most of the males on here.

It's most of the women who are a pain, just not BGB.

*whistles*
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:06, Reply)
Pfft!
*strikes name off next years bash list*
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:10, Reply)
Why are you being so cruel?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:12, Reply)
Don't talk of cruelty to me young man.
You know nothing.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:13, Reply)
Kinky bitch

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:15, Reply)
Women have been nothing but lovely to me.
It's men who have been devious, spiteful, irrational, cruel and violent toward me.

Or...is it the other way round?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:11, Reply)
Yep
You've been nothing but lovely to women, but devious, spiteful, irrational, cruel and violent towards men.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:12, Reply)
And how is your ex?
Morning Monty.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:13, Reply)
'sup, niggah?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:16, Reply)
Word.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:18, Reply)
gaaaay

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:13, Reply)
I don't even trust the gay ones.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:14, Reply)
You shouldn't
They're ghastly! Did you know they can vote now?

*faints*
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:19, Reply)
*bums*

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:23, Reply)
^ SEE! THEY'RE DOING IT AGAIN, MUM!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:15, Reply)
i actually like everyone
With some exceptions. Like people who take me up on my polite offer of tea.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:15, Reply)
What's wrong with that?
If you offer tea, you should be prepared to make the stuff.

Oh, and 'morning all.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:21, Reply)
s'up Crow?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:25, Reply)
Wotcher Al
I have been esconced in The North this past weekend and was surprised by a distinct lack of whippets.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:26, Reply)
Coal? Poverty? Desperation? Colliery brass bands?
Outdoor lavatories? Counterfeit trackwear?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:30, Reply)
incorrect names for baked goods?

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:31, Reply)
Pigeon racing?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:34, Reply)
Lots of people talking funny
And lots of fields, occasionally containing sheep.

And two excellent breweries in Masham. Which is, according to the locals, not pronounced "Mash-uhm" but "Mass-uhm," which made me think of "Mass Ham" and the extended absence of Wet Ham Man.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:35, Reply)
RIP

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:35, Reply)
one thing I noticed when I was in the Peak District was that rather than going "baaa" as sheep normally do
the ones up there go "yeeaaaaah"
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:36, Reply)
I thought they went 'baaaa.....rm cake'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:36, Reply)
Oh dear!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:38, Reply)
Most people are awful
so it stands to reason that most men are awful
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:16, Reply)
This is correct.
People who separate the world's imbeciles by gender are themselves imbeciles.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:18, Reply)
Precisely this!

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:18, Reply)
*hhhnnggggghshhshhhsssss*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:20, Reply)
see also: race

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:22, Reply)
Racism to me is one of the funniest things there is
"Your skin is a different colour to me, therefore I'm better!"

...Hang on, what?

I know it's to do with the in group/out group and all that shite, but I can't help but think it's funny.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:23, Reply)
I agree
until I read something like that website mabazaritchie was on, which makes me ask "what the blithering fuck?"
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:24, Reply)
That site made me feel quite nauseous

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:25, Reply)
Yeah, many men have that reaction to meatspin.com

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:29, Reply)
Meatspin doesn't bother me as much as it used to
I used to go on a forum where it was linked every 5 minutes, like horses on here. I've seen it enough times now where it's just close the tab, rather than panic and spazz out.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:31, Reply)
Regardless of initial appearances
The vast majority of women are in fact, hatchet faced joy thiefs.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:22, Reply)
thieves.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:27, Reply)
Either or.

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:38, Reply)
Well let's have an internet amnesty and ask "How nice/nasty are you?"
I'm slices of niceness served on a bed of sentimentality and drizzled with piquant anger.
(Cave Duck, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:23, Reply)
I'm a very nice person in real life
I think having poor manners should be an arrestable offence, and that everyone should be free to live their own life in whatever way they please.
Unless they're gay. Or black.

However, I have the capability to be extremely cruel if I need to be.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:25, Reply)
nom nom

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:25, Reply)
ALWAYZ IN R HEATS

(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:32, Reply)
I am a seething ball of rage and hate
wrapped in a pleasant, grinning mong.

mong gollum
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:28, Reply)
I would classify myself as the archtypical friendly old duffer.
Not a bad bone in my body. Really.
Except for the tendency to fly off the handle at little things and flail madly about me with a machete.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:34, Reply)
If other people get in the way of the machete, then that's their own silly fault.

(Cave Duck, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:36, Reply)
I'm usually quite nice
However there was a time when my sister used to mockingly call me Dr House
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:02, Reply)
Can I sleep with you Blousy?
I promise not to steal the duvet or put cold bits on you (in fact I am rather hot in bed).
Don't expect sex though. I'm old and lazy.
I'll watch if you fancy having some on your own though.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:27, Reply)
Haha!
Ever the gentleman.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:28, Reply)
Watching a woman flick the bean in front of you is greatly enjoyable
Alternatively, she can paddle in her tuna canoe.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:29, Reply)
Suitably encouraging cheers would be forthcoming.
Anything to help.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:32, Reply)
You are the male Aberracion
AICMFP
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:36, Reply)
I am a nasty bastard
It's official
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:38, Reply)
Show me the paperwork.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:39, Reply)
Not what I've heard off others

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:39, Reply)
Well that's what my ex says
I'm a nasty piece of work who mentally abuses her by calling her a liar and a cheat when she hurts me :(
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:41, Reply)
Just tell her to fuck off!

(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:42, Reply)
Fookin hell
She's a cunt.

All exes are, the secret is to break them mentally, then watch them flail through life, realising that everything is empty, until they drive to a hotel, drink a bottle of vodka, then hang themselves.

Alternatively, just ignore her? Evidently she's spiteful.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:43, Reply)
my exes are fine.
I was friends with them before, and am friends after.

They were fine shortly after the break up even.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:51, Reply)
Relieved mate,
relieved.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:52, Reply)
The word is either 'ecstatic' or 'overjoyed'.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:00, Reply)
or accompanied by "so" in italics
I am so relieved
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:05, Reply)
I've only ever had issues with one ex of mine
They carried on for quite a while. We're friends again now, but there was months of us just not getting on afterwards.

This was compounded by me telling her that she was fat, to her face. Whoops!
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:54, Reply)
Maybe she'll stop calling you names if you stop calling her names
or something.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:47, Reply)
You've got a nine-year old girl's hoody.
It's official.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:42, Reply)
How old is Maddie now?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:43, Reply)
If you stopped going on dates
with mentalist unsuitable women who tell you this, then you would probably not think it's the case.
(berk, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:42, Reply)
It wasn't them

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:50, Reply)
my new cousin is a boy and he's fantastic
so nur
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:39, Reply)
My newest nephew is awesome
Granted, he can't do much yet, but he's still ace.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:41, Reply)
Ditto
But he goes "Click Click" with his tongue when he wants a bottle.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:43, Reply)
That's a dolphin, Roots, not a boy.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:47, Reply)
SPECIESIST

(Cave Duck, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:48, Reply)
We've been calling him Dolphin Boy
And 'Jazz Hands' because he does this little shuddery thing.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:48, Reply)
Different genders
with different brain chemistry and architecture in not thinking the same way shocker.

You are right, though. Most men are bastards. I'm a particularly large one.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:41, Reply)
There's good and bad in everyone.
The people who've been the most unkind to me this year have been women.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:44, Reply)
The brain chemistry and architecture are almost identical.
To the point you can't tell the difference between two dead brains without running a DNA test.

or. you know looking for boobs.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:44, Reply)

brain chemistry and brain architecture pituitary gland.

I should know by now to stay away from science.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:48, Reply)
Necrolols

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:48, Reply)
I'm on my teabreak here

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:47, Reply)
What you havin hon?
Besides tea of course.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:49, Reply)
Flu Max capsules and trapped wind :(

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:50, Reply)
I hate trapped wind.
It fucking hurts.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:51, Reply)
I've been rubbing my belly and bringing my knees up all night.
It's right under my diaphragm.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:52, Reply)
*sadface*
I think there's tablets you can get but I don't know if they're any good.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:53, Reply)
I think I'm being poisoned by the Russians, Blousie

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:55, Reply)
Have you been for sushi in the West End lately?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:56, Reply)
Check the teacups!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:10, Reply)
Net!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:57, Reply)
Have a nice big fart
that should sort it
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:53, Reply)
That's the whole point silly.
She can't. It's trapped.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:55, Reply)
Well release it then
RELEASE THE KRAKEN!
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:56, Reply)
apparantly mint helps

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:05, Reply)
Boys can be pretty horrible
I myself have been horrible many, many times over my life.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:52, Reply)
Until the safe word was spoken surely.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:54, Reply)
Sadly
not. I was a bit of a cock when I was younger.

/\ Strikethrough heaven there!
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:57, Reply)
does anyone know
how to convert a PDF into word???????????

help!

ta...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:53, Reply)
Could you not just copy and paste it if there's no quick convert?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:54, Reply)

translatorbar.com/fileconverter.php
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:54, Reply)
thanks but my work computer has blocked that site...
argh, stupid costs provisions, why do they put them in PDF in the first place???? have a court deadline in about 2 hours...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:55, Reply)
Can you e-mail it to someone with
Adobe Professional?

Otherwise, why not see if you can download a free trial of Adobe Pro?

Failing that, your marketing people will probably have a full version of it.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:58, Reply)
someone in the firm must have done one before
but it's just not coming up on a doc search.

i am resorting to hand amendments and bribing my secretary i think.

and killing myself with stress.

i hate computers, i truly hate them.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:00, Reply)
Learn how to use them then.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:06, Reply)
You're doing the computing equivalent
of changing a light bulb.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:13, Reply)
Doing most things on computers is easy.
WHEN YOU KNOW HOW TO DO IT.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:15, Reply)
It's not hard to learn how to change a lightbulb.
The attitude that they're too difficult to learn how to use and that it's just easier to get somebody else to do it for you is a pretty lame one.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:21, Reply)
Then why bother with an IT department?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:22, Reply)
We're here to make sure that the network runs properly,
to install and maintain equipment, not to teach people how convert one file type to another. I'm not in the Training department.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:24, Reply)
Sorry, nope
I can only do word to PDF
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:55, Reply)
the whole point is you can't really
select all then paste will get the text if that's all you need.
Otherwise there's places online that can convert it but I wouldn't upload any sensitive files via them.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:56, Reply)
no it's all set out in tables
and i don't really have time for my secretary to copy type it.

thanks anyway!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:58, Reply)
tables should be fine.
open the pdf.
Edit: copy file to clipboard
open word
paste.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:02, Reply)
my secretary understood this
and it helped, ta.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:35, Reply)
CTRL-A
CTRL-C
CTRL-V
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:57, Reply)
I think you and I should have a pint this week.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:59, Reply)
I would love to
but I'm horrendously busy and completely booked out already.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:03, Reply)

busy and completely booked out already gay
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:13, Reply)
You missed a CTRL+C in the middle.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:59, Reply)
Fuck
So I did.

How are you this morning?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:01, Reply)
On the ball obviously.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:02, Reply)

ball game
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:03, Reply)
*finger pistols*

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:03, Reply)
"Is that the onlyyy chemistryyy, between us"

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:02, Reply)
PDFs are, by nature, protected.
If you've got the full version of Adobe Acrobat, you can just save to Word. If you don't, you're not doing anything to it. I guess something like Textbridge might be able to help, but if you're at work and your company won't fork out for Acrobat, you're probably not getting anything that might be able to crack it, either.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 10:59, Reply)
Print the PDF, then scan it and save as a JPG and paste into Word
You wont be able to change the table, but you can type lawyer type stuff above and below.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:05, Reply)
using print screen or the image select in Adobe Reader would be an easier way of doing that

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:06, Reply)
I thought there might be an easier way

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:19, Reply)
I am starting to reminisce fondly about the waterproof trousers thread now.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:14, Reply)
hahaha!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:16, Reply)
Come on Monty, try and help
if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the pricipitate
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 8 Nov 2010, 11:21, Reply)

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