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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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New thread is new, shiney and unsullied.
Try and shock me.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 12:53, 205 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
No

(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 12:55, Reply)
Gwan!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 12:56, Reply)
I'm very charming and witty.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:21, Reply)
I said shock me, not lie through your teeth.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:27, Reply)
*Throws a 3 bar electric fire into your bath*

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 12:59, Reply)
Can you still get them?
*frazzles*
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 12:59, Reply)
Yeah.
Although other bacon flavoured crisps are available.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:01, Reply)
I said shock me, not amuse me.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:02, Reply)

muse rouse
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:03, Reply)
I've thrown an electric fire in your bath, that should be shocking.
What sort of thing were you expecting?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:03, Reply)
Some information on yourself or a famous dude that may make my jaw drop.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:05, Reply)
Neil Buchanan is in a heavy metal band called Marseilles

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:06, Reply)
*falls asleep*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:08, Reply)
Don't worry, that's purely there for Monty's sake

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:10, Reply)
Apparently.
John's not mad.

Fuckin' Nescafe
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:07, Reply)
*applies electrodes*
I just came back from the pub
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:00, Reply)
You're starting early today.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:01, Reply)
Good work.
You a bit tipsy?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:01, Reply)
nah
that was just to shock blousie. I was there for a tute and drank only coffee
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:02, Reply)
Why on earth would I be shocked at you in the pub at lunchtime you little student alkie you.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:04, Reply)
In my student bar
you could smoke bongs at the tables. So we did, at nine o'clock in the fucking morning sometimes.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:07, Reply)
LIES
Students up before 9 in the morning?

I don't think so.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:08, Reply)
Yes if they never went to bed.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Like me
I got an hour in my chair this morning, then up and out walking by half ten to get there for eleven
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:10, Reply)
Or they had to do the walk of shame.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:11, Reply)
Haven't done that for a long while.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:13, Reply)
That's because you have no shame

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:14, Reply)
Nah! it's because I always used to go back to my place.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:16, Reply)
And lock them in the cellar.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:18, Reply)
I don't do shame walks
the last time I was shamed though was half nine this morning when my scout looked at me with loathing as though to say 'you disgust me you filthy brat'
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Your scout?
Have you been dib-dib-dibbling?
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:18, Reply)
scout = cleaner

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:20, Reply)
Why are they called scouts?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:20, Reply)
Just a nickname from Victorian times I think
I'm pretty sure it has military connotations en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bedder
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:23, Reply)
They have badges on their arms?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:30, Reply)
I like wine.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:01, Reply)
*faints*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:02, Reply)
"All this wine nonsense!
You get all these wine people, don't you? Wine this, wine that. Let's have a bit of red, let's have a bit of white. Ooh, that's a snazzy bouquet. Oh, this smells of, I don't know, basil. Sometimes you just want to say, sod all this wine, just give me a pint of, mineral water."

"Can I just shock you? I like wine. Despite what I just said earlier. At any one time I have nine bottles of wine in my house."
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:04, Reply)
Erm.........is this from some TV show?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:06, Reply)
Alan Partridge

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:08, Reply)


(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:09, Reply)
a-ha!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:11, Reply)
'Yeah, give me a second series ya shit'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:13, Reply)
"Smell my cheese you nobber!"

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Mathew Kelly is happily married and not gay.

(Cave Duck, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:01, Reply)
Nor a peado I hear.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:01, Reply)
Blimey, I'm shocked now.

(Cave Duck, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:03, Reply)
I'm actually a nice person

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:02, Reply)
You know I could
so I won't even try.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:05, Reply)
Hahaha!
You know so little about me despite what I say on here.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:07, Reply)
Aha, I could easily say you know
so little about me...
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:07, Reply)
I have an inkling.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Mine's bigger.

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:16, Reply)
I don't doubt that ; )

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:17, Reply)
He fucking could.
I can tell you for FOR DEFINITE.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:10, Reply)
I think he should

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:15, Reply)
I have been left open-mouthed and aghast at some of the things that boy has had to deal with
in his work.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:17, Reply)
I'm not sure what he works as
But I know Lab will have had to deal with some of the sickest shit there is, that frightens me
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:18, Reply)
Yeah, but I'm good at it, and it keeps the cunts off the streets/internet
Plus frees those wrongly accused. I'd say that's worth the toll it takes on me, at least until the day I flip out and pull a Moaty.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:21, Reply)
You are Judge Dredd AICMFP

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:22, Reply)
More chins, less epic jaw line
I AM THE LAW!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:22, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=glUf4PQ-vuU
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:31, Reply)
We had CP
the other day. Luckily it's very rare but still horrible when it happens.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:29, Reply)
CP?
Child porn?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:32, Reply)
That's what it stands for in my line of work...
*concerned face*
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:33, Reply)
eek
Not good
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:35, Reply)
Not good....GREAT!!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:40, Reply)
Not good at all
We reported it as we usually do.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:57, Reply)
Good good
*manly handshakes*
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:16, Reply)
Corporal punishment?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:34, Reply)
Presumably you went to The Filth?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:40, Reply)
What do you do??

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:42, Reply)
I read that in a 'budda-boom-budda-bing New York 'wise guy' voice

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:44, Reply)
Pop quiz, hotshot!
What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:46, Reply)
He's your dad's secretary.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:45, Reply)
hahaha!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:45, Reply)
Yes but you're a delicate little soul despite how undelicate your life is.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:18, Reply)
You're fucking with my rep here.


PS 'indelicate'
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:21, Reply)
TPS reports mid month?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:23, Reply)
MORE SHOCKING EVEN THAN THAT.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:25, Reply)
Double ply toilet roll instead of tripple?
EXCEPT, he bought tripple and stole one of the plys for his own nafarious use.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:27, Reply)
Steady on, old boy - nothing THAT heinous.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:34, Reply)
I think Lampito should tell the barefoot story, as that's supposedly shocking

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Today I am not tired
This has certainly shocked me


*boo*
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:10, Reply)
there's no "e" in shiny
is that shocking enough?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:18, Reply)
I thought so but I'm not in the mood to be careful today.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:19, Reply)
I spent more time than I'd care to admit
pondering on the spelling of 'fiery' the other day. It's all wrong isn't it?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:24, Reply)

fiery feiry firey fierey on fire
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:25, Reply)
"ablaze"

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:26, Reply)
"conflagrated"

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:28, Reply)
HE'S ON FUCKING FIRE!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:28, Reply)
"burny"

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:45, Reply)
*likes*

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:48, Reply)
the ones that always get me are
twelfth (why is that f in there? why?) and eighth (never ever looks right)
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:47, Reply)
An eighth can sometimes look extremely right.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:53, Reply)
as always
you are right
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:55, Reply)

Wellgroomedwookie wrestles sharks under the name The Vortex
Labia Majora's tattoos were done by his Mum using a Letraset kit left over from the seventies.
Rachel Swipe only likes pink as a result of a tough love intensive therapy intervention brought about by her family to cure her of the intense gothiness that blighted her teenage years.
Althegeordie has Britain's biggest collection of Little House On The Prairie memrobilia.
(Cave Duck, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:23, Reply)
*is shocked*

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:24, Reply)
Hahaha!
But the last one is general knowledge on B3ta.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:25, Reply)
G'night Al!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:31, Reply)
That was the Waltons, though, wasn't it?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:56, Reply)
I haven't got a clue, to be honest
Ask Al
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:57, Reply)
*is finally relieved that the truth is out*

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:26, Reply)
Saying that, it was the iron on Letraset

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:29, Reply)
She's very good.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:30, Reply)
Not bad considering she's 60 and gets pissed on a single glass of wine
She used to be a nurse though, so is good with needles.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:32, Reply)
I'm not on here much this week as I'm off to Egypt.
They tell me there's a problem needs fixin'.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:28, Reply)
i don't just like pink for the hell of it
and the only pink clothes i really wear are underwear.

what i like are random object that have been uniquely bred in pink and therefore make me laugh - eg fridges, vintage radios, ipods, cameras, iphones, etc!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:46, Reply)
It also means your flat will only be burgled by women and gays.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:50, Reply)
I don't think I really could without revealing stuff on here that I don't really want as common knowledge.
I suppose I own an entire shopping centre, true story, does that count?
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:26, Reply)
Intriguing rather than shocking I'd say.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:27, Reply)
Here's a photo.
sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs289.snc3/28102_10150168251320627_532685626_12294831_4535454_n.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:30, Reply)
Lacoste!
I love their cologne...
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:33, Reply)
Monty Boyce - Sub editor of Marxism Today.

(Cave Duck, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:31, Reply)
Now THAT would be shocking.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:38, Reply)
Has it got a sushi place?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:29, Reply)
Obviously not
otherwise he'd not have to spend so much on it
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:30, Reply)
It should of had 2 restaurants and a bar, but there was some problems.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:31, Reply)
:(((:(:(:(::((:(:(:(

(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:40, Reply)
hi
did i ever mention that i am a property lawyer?

or how amazingly gorgeous i find you?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:42, Reply)
I got an email from a former principal of a strict catholic school, he apparently likes to spank.
wait...that's not so shocking after all...
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:33, Reply)
I find David Bowie at worst mildly irritating.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:42, Reply)
Fuck, no.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:43, Reply)
LIES!
You dont find anything mildly irritating
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:43, Reply)
This shocked me when I first saw it
urbanlegends.about.com/library/bl_breast_larvae.htm

Still makes me rather ill.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:42, Reply)
Aha, 'seed pod tits'.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:43, Reply)
I know it's fake
but even the source image makes me vaguely nauseated.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:52, Reply)
My boobs hurt now.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:51, Reply)
I wouldn't say hurt so much
but my immediate reaction was to rush to the loo and check them. Bleagh. Silly really, even I can see that that image is doctored - and if you had larvae living in your boob the rest of it would be a lot mankier than that, all swollen and oozing....
I'm really not helping myself feel any better here, am I?
(berk, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:04, Reply)
I listened to a Radio One podcast this morning
and I liked it :/
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:42, Reply)
Ugh.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:43, Reply)
It was the punk show that they do at about 2 a.m.
They played X Ray Spex. It was awesome.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:45, Reply)
*loves X ray spex*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:47, Reply)
Exactly. You can't hate something that plays 'Oh Bondage, Up Yours'
Don't worry anyway, I am safely listening to Ian Dury for the foreseeable future now whilst beavering away trying to convince myself I'm being remotely useful.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:50, Reply)
I do like his earthy humour

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:53, Reply)
bizarrely while searching for the above urban myth
by searching "wormy breast" on google images, the first image I checked turned out to be a comment on a blog post about "Germfree Adolescent".

Small world.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:58, Reply)
Ooh that's a bit odd

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 7 Dec 2010, 13:59, Reply)
It's all the work of the Illuminati
EVERYTHING'S CONNECTED!
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:06, Reply)
I read this yesterday
www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2010/dec/05/olympic-games-2012-alien-conspiracy-theory

It kept me amused while I waited for a bus
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:10, Reply)
I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:01, Reply)
puuuure disgust here Monty

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:02, Reply)
You went to Burger King?
*jaw drops*
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:02, Reply)

busy bummed
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:03, Reply)
cleaning the toilets?

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:04, Reply)
That's right: WITH YOUR HAIR.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:07, Reply)
You're not a very nice lady.

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:19, Reply)
'I'll eat up all your crackers and your licorice
hey yo fat girl, c'mere--are ya ticklish?
Yeah, I called ya fat.
Look at me, I'm skinny
It never stopped me from gettin' busy
I'm a freak
I like the girls with the boom
I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom
I'm crazy.
Allow me to amaze thee.
They say I'm ugly but it just don't faze me.
I'm still gettin' in the girls' pants
and I even got my own dance.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:05, Reply)
That's a Whopper.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:05, Reply)
I used to work in McDonalds
you would be amazed at how many people used to shag in the disabled toilet. Always chavs though - Monty, I'm surprised at you, stooping so low!
(berk, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:05, Reply)
It's a shame it wasn't a KFC berk
I could have made a crass 'finger lickin' good' comment.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:07, Reply)
*sigh*
actually I have been known to pretend I'm Nigella Lawson whilst making cakes, that filthy finger licking minx.
(berk, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:11, Reply)
Do you do the "looking through your hair" thing
and the breasts?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:17, Reply)
I do have a fringe
I can peer sexily through* but I'm afraid I do not have her norks. Or probably even half!

*NB, this may actually just make me look myopic
(berk, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:20, Reply)
I dont think many women do!
Peer away!
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:22, Reply)
I would RUIN that woman

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:18, Reply)
Double mastectomy?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:19, Reply)
hahaha

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:24, Reply)
I actually pondered before posting that
Then I remembered where I was
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:26, Reply)
could be POTD, that.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:31, Reply)
Ta!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:32, Reply)
How dare you.
She is MINE.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:25, Reply)
Has NO-ONE here heard of Digital Underground?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:08, Reply)
Peter has
and you
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:09, Reply)
Heard of an artist you like?
Highly unlikely.
(berk, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:10, Reply)
No

(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:10, Reply)
I've just been annoyed by the Internet
I've just received an email from bunches.co.uk reminding me 'it's been a while' since I last used their service.

What a nice way to be reminded you're single. Being spammed with 'you've not sent anyone flowers in a long time'.

Cunts.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:08, Reply)
You have reminded me to buy my good lady wife some flowers
Think of it as public service by proxy
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:10, Reply)
Have 25% off if you use bunches.co.uk
Discount code: K1W6R9G1F5Z

I won't be using it.

*Sobs*
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:13, Reply)
Hahaha!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:14, Reply)
You've changed.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:16, Reply)
Are you surprised?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:17, Reply)
No.
You ALL change, it is a fault with the breed.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:19, Reply)
Perhaps your right.
*shrugs*
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:26, Reply)
Send some to blousie!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:15, Reply)
I don't like flowers.
I prefer plants.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:17, Reply)

l
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:20, Reply)
how do you feel about teddy bears?

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:21, Reply)
No thank you.
I've never been sent flowers, chocolates or teddy bears. I was given a small cadburys cream egg with a knitted duckling by an ex girlfriend once.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:25, Reply)
Of those three I have only sent the first.
Teddy bears are strictly for face-to-face noncing, I find.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:27, Reply)
I have only ever been sent flowers once.
I was at work and I still rank it in my top five most embarrassing moments of all time. If anyone ever gave me a teddy I think my head would fall off or something.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:32, Reply)
Nothing says 'I think you're a bit retarded' better than sending a stuffed toy to an adult.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:34, Reply)
This, exactly
Flowers die, and I hate chocolate. It's all terribly unimaginative too.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:36, Reply)
oh yes, unimaginative, that's what I said to a guy once that asked me to go to the movies and bowling
I told him to be more original.
I totally hurt his feelings.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:39, Reply)
I don't understand why anyone would want to go to the cinema on an early date
You can't talk. It's dark. It doesn't make sense.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:43, Reply)
my gran had about a thousand of them
my grandfather drove a tractor trailer and brought them back for her
it was really gross, they used to cuddle all the time, my gran would sit on his lap and run her fingers through his thinning grey hair and look at him like she wanted to jump his bones right there
yeurgh!
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:38, Reply)
I always seem to end up with people who don't like sending gifts.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:34, Reply)
They are called tight fuckers
and not in the good way either!
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:35, Reply)
I hate teddys and chocolates. I don't mind flowers as long as they aren't roses. Or carnations ffs. Ugliest flower in the world.
I really really don't like roses.
I once got a dozen red roses before a date. I was thoroughly embarrassed and disappointed, which is a bit rude I reckon.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:35, Reply)
To quote Blousie a few posts previously.
"Hahaha!"
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:17, Reply)
*ZING*
pwned by spam - unlucky!
(berk, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:10, Reply)
You say 'unlucky'
But I'll bet you are really pissing yourself laughing.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:14, Reply)
I may have experienced
a momentary feeling of schadenfreude, yes. But it passed quickly.
(berk, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:17, Reply)
What? When you realised no one has sent you flowers in a while?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:18, Reply)
Yeah, pretty much

(berk, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:19, Reply)
I have got my boots back from the cobbler's!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:15, Reply)
Cobblers.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:16, Reply)
are they all shiny and new?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:18, Reply)
They will be when I've used my polishing skillz on them.

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:25, Reply)
Italy, as a unified country, has existed for less than 100 years.
The last area joined after WWI.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:18, Reply)
I'm watching New Moon
now that's shocking
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:20, Reply)
Shame on you.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:24, Reply)
yeah
says the Burger King man
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:25, Reply)
Yes but in your case
it wasn't a quote from someone else WAS IT?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:28, Reply)
I reckon you're covering up your shame
by claiming it's a song. I heard you were the inspiration for that song.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:29, Reply)
Yes dear.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Dec 2010, 14:33, Reply)

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