Lots of rubbish pet names:
When I was very little we had a golden retriever I called Woofy. Apparently I once completely covered him in vaseline... We went on to have a budgie which I named Peter after an uncle I didn’t like much (yes I detested the budgie hence the name).
Other childhood pets were cats called Mister Tumnus (after the faun in the lion the witch and the wardrobe) and Cassie (no idea why, but at least it was a normal name).
I now have a very fat cat called Oakie – he’s called this just because he was given to my folks by a bloke that did Karaoke in their pub.
(duchess, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:49, Reply)

Precious
A black, norwegian, dwarf, lop-eared rabbit was so named after that stalwart of Blue Peter, Precious Mackenzie, who was a Weight Lifter from Mauritius. Rabbit was so named because, he too, was small and black.
( TheCockwellInn, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:48, Reply)

Three Pet Mice
Called Ted, Jack and Dougal, for reasons that should be obvious.

Except that they're all female mice, and it confuses my friends muchly. Dougal seems to have a penchant for dangling from the bars at the top of the cage and will clamber around like that for ages. Dunno why.

Any future pets will have their species misnamed rather than their gender just to really confuse them. A cat called "Mouse", a small dog named "Rhinocerous", etc.
(Glis, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:48, Reply)

nice one sis...
We have a tropical fish tank with loads of little tropical efforts (guppys, neons etc) and one huge plec. One day my sister spies some (what she considers) 'cute' albino frogs in a pet store... buys two and pops 'em into the tank. For a start they are NOT fucking cute. They are FUCKING ugly. You can see through the fuckers. She decides to call the larger of the two 'Brian' and then apparently rapidly running out of inspiration she calls the other one 'Frog'. Brian and Frog have a great first few weeks by proceeding to happily munch their way through the plethora of fishies in the tank, then one dies, leaving us now with one fucking ugly frog and one huge plec.

To rub it in, she then leaves home. I assume the two incidents are unrelated..

Just remembered... Whilst on the subject of our fish tank, my mom calls the plec 'Big Boy'. I have tried to discourage this sort of behaviour, but no joy. Nobody else in the family sees the issues with this name... *shudders*

Mom: Phil, will you feed big boy please...
Me: *shudders*
(clothtoucher, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:47, Reply)

Fishy names
Some of the names of my fish (of which I have many) are called Caligula, Don Giovanni, and the late great, eaten-by-a-bleeding-heron Spicy Beef. God I miss him.
(Caligula, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:45, Reply)

My Friend
Had a goldfish called Pinky Tractor

wotta bumgay!
(Midas, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:44, Reply)

I was a geeky child
I went through a really-liking-history phase (dont we all) and was particularly interested in explorers of the world.

So when I got a cat it was called Columbus Nina Pinta Santa-Maria. That's *obviously* Columbus and his ships.
I refused to abbreviate for a while.
(elegans, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:42, Reply)

We were getting a black Labrador and we couldnt decide what to call her
me and my Dad wanted to call her Black Death. My mum wouldnt let us : (
Also when I was about 8 or 9 I had a hamster and as I was a big fan of the Tin-Tin books, I wanted to call it Rastapopulos. Once again I was foiled by my mum who wouldnt' let me.

Also I once met a Tortoise who was simply named: little Sod
( the_fabulous_dancing_yak You like game? You come see 5punk.co.uk. You like!, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:41, Reply)

My mate
Had a cat called suzacat, because it was generally suicidal. It'd jump down from the roof onto his open window, the only way of getting him down was to close the window and let the poor bugger drop a storey.

It used to do it on a regular basis, much to the amusement of us.
( CowJam, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:34, Reply)

big paws, little paws
and mrs pussy have all been names my mum came up with for our family cats when I was growing up. Oh, and kitten. that one took ages.
(little paws was stolen by some people from up the road when we went on holiday. they lured it with fresh tuna and salmon, as opposed to the whiskas the neighbour was feeding it. thieves. the cat turned into a big fat thing. not that I'm bitter.)
(mrbeans is felching, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:33, Reply)

Pet names
We had a dog called Spider, named by the breeder (he was a pedigree, dontch'a know. He was the 8th born in the litter, and was the only all-black pup.

There was a family round the corner from us at the time, who had a dog called Fly, so Spider & Fly would go for walks together. We'd joke about Spider eating Fly, except our dog was terrified of most other dogs....

And my sister has originally named her Ginger tomcat Ginge.

My cats are D&G (although I was going to call the timid one Scaredy, and the jealous one Jellybags - I'm oh so original)
(ricky_darkholer is blonde on the inside, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:32, Reply)

As children my sister and I
kept pet mice. She had a thing about ROmancing the Stone, so one was called jack, and the other Colton. I objected to my mousebeing called colton, so it got changed to cotton.
(Flower has a new job!, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:30, Reply)

I have a cat...
His name is Martin. We didn't feel it was fair to give him a "fluffy" name. My first pet was a guinea pig called Baldrick, which really embarrassed me in those "what's your porn star name?" conversations.

My dad as a kid had a hamster called Bun Bun (because his sister thought it was a rabbit). Simple children.....
(Vernie, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:30, Reply)

my kitten was called "great prophet zarquon"
but it ran away or died or something :(
anyway, i got a new one. it's called "knötchen", which is a... fluffier form of knot.
(synthacon9 likes white wine and nutella, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:30, Reply)

...extra bits kitty kat...
my little bro got a kitten and called it Anna..until it got a bit older and realised it was'nt a girl...and called it spanner because it had nuts...

*I thank you*
(MrE, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:28, Reply)

Jointsworth
was another cat of my friend. He was a stray that had been left so we adopted the poor lil' bugger.

He got his name because, 1) We where a bunch of stoners, and 2) He was tiny - like a joints worth.

Indeed - he grew into a big fat lovely git :) Turned into more of a nine-bar !
(JBoom, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:28, Reply)

Deoji
The dog's name was Deoji. Sound it out. :)
(inKryptic, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:24, Reply)

my rat
was called the 'curly burger'. she had curly hair and was so sweet i wanted to eat her in a bun. (er...)

also, my girlfriend has a pet name for my penis. she calls the old fella 'mr wiggly' coz it wiggles.
(magictorch, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:24, Reply)

Squeeky The Pig
I once had a pet pig named Squeeky - Then I ate him!
(Mrwoody123, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:23, Reply)

Sambo
My father, in his infinite wisdom, decided to name our blacker than black dog Sambo....oh you can imagine the situations that got us in....
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:21, Reply)

Wilma Blackbeard Fit
That's the name of my cat. I wanted to call it Blackbeard, but turns out she was a girl - so we bunged Wilma at the front. That way I can stand on my doorstep and shout "Wiiiillllmaaaaa" when she goes missing.

We added the "fit" part later, as in "Will my Blackbeard fit" - hurhurhur. It was the beers fault. Sorry cat.
(JBoom, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:20, Reply)

Cat Deeely & Cat Stevens.
Named in our online kitten naming competition by Spunky Backpack and later featured in the now defunct 'Amy's I' column in the mirror. Woo.
(tomsk, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:19, Reply)

Steve the Fish
my name is Steve and I have a fish called Steve the Fish. I am his dad.
(wooden_toy, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:18, Reply)

I used to have a cat called Diesel
so called because he purred like a London Taxi.

He was completely mental,
he could detect a packet of cheese and onion crisps being opened from half a mile away (note: only cheese and onion)
He once managed to fight his way into my oven and remove and eat a whole roast(ing at Gas mk 6 ) chicken.
He'd also run headlong into glass doors.


Also. Not mine, but a mate had a Rottweiler called "Arnie" but it was soft and stupid so got renamed "Fluffy" - he seemed much happier with his new name !
( The Mighty Gusset Doesn't Care - And Doesn't Care Who Knows It !, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:18, Reply)

My brother Patrick had two fish...
Oscar and Fingeryboots -- no-one ever found out why. Fingeryboots died of some kind of swimbladder disfunction, which involved swimming in a circle for three days before exploding.

Hmmm, Patrick, -- I have just realised you are probably reading this! Get a job, you gangly great oaf.
( Micro Prawnvica, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:15, Reply)

When I was a kid
the family that lived next door to us were called the Cox's. They had a rabbit called Floppy that was always getting getting ill. At our local vets they used to call animals in to see the vet by their pet name and then the family name, so whenever it was Floppy's turn the receptionist would call out "Floppy Cox"!
(DJ Travelcard, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:14, Reply)

You just do not want to know this...
...but our entire menagerie has been named after a gang of hardened criminals. Mrs Duck despairs of me:

* Robber Rabbit - the evil mastermind who even has his own web site. He's a rabbit, and he's a robber.
* Getaway Driver Hamster and sidekick Ryan "Killer" Minogue
* Genial Harry Grout (who is an extremely cute West Highland Terrier)
* Gangster's Moll Cat, who'd take your face off given half the chance.

oh, and...

* Norman Stanley Goldfish, habitual criminal and scrote.

I am not mad.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:14, Reply)

We had a hamster called Squeaky
when she died the next one was called Squeaky B
after that we had a grey dwarf hamster called Graham
after that, back to form with Squeaky C, whose testicles would pop out when he went to bed and he'd wake up with what looked like a bright pink bum.
( High Lord Phanty, Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:05, Reply)

My cat.....
... was called Abby, which is short for abnormal... because she only had three legs.
( Lord_Floaty Hooting gladly., Wed 25 Feb 2004, 14:03, Reply)