
Freddie Woo tells us: "We used to lock kids in the toilets at school just because we could." But why would you do such a thing? Why would you give teaching such a bad name? Tell us about times when events have taken a turn for the harsh.
Suggested by Munsta
( , Thu 18 Jul 2013, 16:06)
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Cheers, Dad & Mum.
( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 20:32, 84 replies)

I don't think you're trying hard enough, pet.
( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 20:36, closed)

And the rental of the hallway cupboard in your Bristol property is fucking scandalous.
You turmeric minged munter.
( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 20:44, closed)

who go out begging every day and wash car windscreens, then go back home after stealing your taxes to pay for their unwashed kids in some nouveau riche gypsy fannypalace.
( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 21:05, closed)

I send that sort of applicant to the paddy idiots who bought in LS9.
( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 21:19, closed)

I think you're doing it wrong.
( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 21:09, closed)

Don't know what to do with it like, but at least it's something to brag about.
( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 21:16, closed)

( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 21:23, closed)

he was dead by then, and I could afford to make the solicitor forge the will
( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 21:26, closed)

( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 21:31, closed)

now Captain Autism will probably roll up and post this link again
probably
( , Sun 21 Jul 2013, 21:39, closed)

I think this S S S S S S S S S S chap is a life loser.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 20:16, closed)

Inherited house/money (sold house, invested money very carefully), paid off mortgage on 1st house. Leased to a good friend at a very friendly rate. Bought current home outright (no mortgage or debt ever again. Ever.) Own both cars.
10 years later, investment dividends provide nice annual income by "skimming the cream" without having to touch the capital - the missus and I only work because we choose to.
Insure your parents and make sure you have a good alibi.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 1:26, closed)

if what I have to say so annoys you that you must post rude and disrespectful responses to pretty much each and every post I make - have you thought of maybe putting me on "Ignore"?
I'm sure it would save you a lot of aggro and upset.
Unfortunately for me it would mean that I couldn't post these glib replies that seem to enrage you so much... But, I can live with that. That being said if I'm logged out and happen to come across one your seething, boiled-piss posts I may have trouble not commenting - but just think, everyone apart from you would be able to see it.
That's got to be better than all the diazepam and vodka in world, right?
NB.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 5:57, closed)

Having relatives die and living off their money is the only thing that's keeping the poor fat fuck off the breadline.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 7:58, closed)

I don't really get why you are trying to goad me into being pissed off about my mother dying.
Trust me, after watching her manage to get her PhD whilst the cancer spread from her lungs to her brain - anything you say is lightweight.
I say this sincerely - if your parents are still alive, I hope they die peacefully asleep in their beds.
If not, well keep trying to goad me. And enjoy your break from here.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 11:08, closed)

It's allowed you to maintain the lower middle class life you'd never have achieved on your own.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 11:19, closed)

Boring post about house ownership aside, McUglywife is right about not wanting to watch your parents die of cancer. You really don't.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 15:51, closed)

But thanks like.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 15:59, closed)

EHRMAHGURD!!1! MODS!!!1
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 11:29, closed)

that takes showing off to ridiculous heights.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 13:15, closed)

and gave her something to do while she developed the cancer cover story and took her own life.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 14:11, closed)

Nice try, Ringo, but you're no LIEmallow.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 9:51, closed)

He's not a porky poshboy immigrant living off mummy's pennies.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 10:04, closed)

"living off" & much more than "pennies".
Remember that when you are sitting there at work. :-)
My mum would be well proud, and she was a stingy bitch!
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 10:15, closed)

Could you maybe drain your pool, then fill it with all those pennies and swim about like Scrooge McDuck?
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 10:23, closed)

Huey, Dewey and Louie at the next bbq for all attendees.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 10:30, closed)

I may have to try it on the barbie
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 11:41, closed)

Magret is too fatty. You can griddle it but if you lob it straight on the grill it'll shoot flames eight foot high. And legs need slow cooking.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 11:44, closed)

might be an option then in a nice sauce.
Though 8 foot high flames sounds fun
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 11:58, closed)

in what Guinness have officially recorded the most middle-class arson EVER.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 12:03, closed)

As I sit here making the world better I'm constantly wishing I was a chinless underachiever who's satisfied with a life more mediocre than the one he was born into.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 10:29, closed)

Finally a benchmark that I can work towards.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 10:31, closed)

until he went bankrupt from the pressure of having to fund his son when he went and joined that Wacky cult thing. The worst of it was he wasnt even his real dad!!!
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 11:43, closed)

all his mates came round and got stoned but there wasn't enough food in the house and all he had to feed them with was cod in breadcrumbs
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 11:59, closed)

I bought my first house in 2007, and now 6 years later I still own that house plus I have a metal garden shed and a gazebo too, but the gazebo isn't waterproof sadly.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 6:03, closed)

"They're not making anymore of it boy, so always invest in fudge."
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 6:39, closed)

You're clearly just a work-shy prole with no ambition further than getting drunk on a Friday after work and impregnating some easily-impressed local womb.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 8:45, closed)

but then I wouldn't be able to make my mortgage payments.
Tragic, really. I don't even own an imaginary coffee machine.
( , Mon 22 Jul 2013, 9:05, closed)
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