The general public of Britain
for almost universally adopting the policy "it isn't affecting me right now this instant as we speak so why the fuck should I care?".
(StapMyVitals wouldn't mind a bit of that, Mon 27 Dec 2010, 12:55, 7 replies)

You
Yes, you :P
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Mon 27 Dec 2010, 11:29, 1 reply)

Ginger people
freaks
( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Mon 27 Dec 2010, 11:21, 5 replies)

Whoever it was that gave me the 'flu
despite paying £12.99 for a 'flu jab. I hope you enjoyed the sweats, shivers and sleepless nights as much as I'm doing.
(rogerzilla, Mon 27 Dec 2010, 10:25, 4 replies)

The People of Wooton Bassett
wheel a Tesco trolley down the high street full of Iraqi and Afghani child sized coffins once in a while you smug cunts!
( cakeburglar still bored with Freebase, Mon 27 Dec 2010, 4:56, 50 replies)

Simon Cockwell... i mean Cowell
For continuing to rape the soul of music year in year out.
(Squid83, Sun 26 Dec 2010, 22:39, 2 replies)

pigeons
evil bastards that they are. oh, they may look stupid, but that's just a cover for their nefarious scheme to TAKE OVER THE WORLD!
look at trafalgar square! that's an army, people! they've infiltrated our everyday lives, learning about our strengths and weaknesses, just waiting to attack us when our defences are down!
you take it from me, one day, those feathery little cunts will be our vermin-riddled overlords, using cats as their generals.
NONE OF US ARE SAFE! BEWARE! BEEEWAAAAARE!!!!!!!!

*froths*
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 26 Dec 2010, 18:07, 6 replies)

The Mongs.
for causing that nice Mr Boyle so much trouble this year.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Sun 26 Dec 2010, 16:22, 3 replies)

The blacks.

(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Sun 26 Dec 2010, 14:00, 10 replies)

Clarkson
For that is his name.

Another year of raking it in from a volume of the anthologized ghost written newspaper columns, while not so subtly trying to continue living like a public schoolboy, with a 'Hamster' up his arse and bullying the 'slow' kid.
(Monchberter Can't go wrong with Doom, Sun 26 Dec 2010, 8:57, Reply)

Professor Mayhem
Surprised he hasn't been mentioned yet. Using his orbital seismic ray to cause the eruption of Eyjafjallajökull and grounding air traffic for nearly a week is reason enough to nominate him, notwithstanding its continued attacks on Indonesia and the rocket strike on the Deepwater Horizon. And, most damning of all, he's a majority shareholder in News Corp. Evil! Pure and simple!
(bergec is filled with inertia, Sun 26 Dec 2010, 5:59, 1 reply)

Jesus
Or whoever decided that extended far flung family should get together to eat a festive meal on Dec 25th to celebrate the birth of some mythical deity would be a good idea.
Goodwill to all?
Ive experienced less stress being chased by baton weilding blood lust crazed coppers
(insomniac-surfer oh go on then, just this once, Sun 26 Dec 2010, 1:10, 7 replies)

Festy toilet hands.
Sometimes know as sloepoke. He gets my nomination this year for injecting more drugs into himself than his little body could handle and thus dying.The week before Christmas. On the last day of his job that he had worked for 11 years in & had quit to go and do something better. A month before him, his missus and kids were supposed to go for a holiday to the UK. 2 weeks after my birthday.

Miss you, love you & if there is an afterlife hope Satan's poking a pitchfork up your jaxxy you selfish wanker.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sat 25 Dec 2010, 23:31, 6 replies)

It's just past midnight here in Sweden....
.....on the 25th Dec.

The missus is in bed now - has been for 15 minutes, and thinks she's going to get some cock now.... but I reckon there's some reading to be done on b3ta.

*strokes the White and Grey* Marlington*






* Only Bond Villains can afford pure-white cats you know
( Humpty Dumpty was Pushed Is unaware of having any limits., Sat 25 Dec 2010, 23:15, 3 replies)

Bill McLaren
For calling me a tit and 'accidentally' standing on my foot, but mostly for being inconsiderate enough to die back in January.

Not that I was a rugby fan or anything, but he was so vocally enthusiastic, knowledgeable & passionate about something that it could grip most viewers.

Not like these twats of late that seem to think that raising their voice when they think something exciting is about to happen constitutes valid & engaging commentary.
( SpackyWomble, Sat 25 Dec 2010, 20:22, Reply)

Clegg
and his 30 pieces of silver.

I hope he gives everyone who voted for him a share
( Fire & Forget it's the only way to be sure, Sat 25 Dec 2010, 20:02, Reply)

Head of Entertainment on BBC1
For green-lighting Dr Who.

In 1963.

I just sat through an hour of nonsensical, cripplingly embarrassed actors and actresses wanking away my license fee.

That Matt bloke already looks like he's had his face beaten concave, so there's nothing we can do to harm him! Nothing!!!
(Monchberter Can't go wrong with Doom, Sat 25 Dec 2010, 19:35, 8 replies)

santa
For not bringing the slippers I wanted
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Sat 25 Dec 2010, 15:07, 1 reply)

Barack Obama
For being the hero we deserve, but not the one we need.
(WordsMeanThings, Sat 25 Dec 2010, 13:10, Reply)

Herman D's Jedi's
For being right bastards (and amusing me all year round)

Hurrah!
(mr-lizard Hell's teeth man!, Fri 24 Dec 2010, 17:09, Reply)

Bruce
Forsyth for being an oxygen thief.
( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Fri 24 Dec 2010, 16:45, 1 reply)

Whoever it was
who came up with this and made me laugh far too early in the day.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Fri 24 Dec 2010, 16:28, 4 replies)

Cesar Millan
Sleazy, greasy, self-satisfied fuckwit cunt who thinks by winning the ladies over with his creepy latin smarm can tell everyone about how dogs tick and charge $35,000 per half hour for the privilege.

An utter wanker: He hits dogs, has dangerous methods (which will come back to literally bite him in the arse), hasn't got a clue what he's talking about with his dodgy, unscientific wank bollocks and has put back dog training 40 years. Well done you prick.

Just because you managed to creep into America from Mexico doesn't mean you don't have to work fucking hard and get into debt get a behavioural science degree like the rest of us.

I so wish that the electric fences on the border could have got you before you had time to put electric collars around thousands of dogs' necks. I wish you a slow, painful one in 2011.
(gspgirl Sleeping with Prince Valium, Fri 24 Dec 2010, 16:13, 11 replies)

David Cameron
I know there's not a lot of love for Cleggy-chops at the moment, but let's not forget whose party actually proposed the grossly misdirected round of cuts in the first place. He's getting all of the most disgusting cuts to welfare, the rape of student finances, and the fudging of figures with the NHS out of the way early while the Lib Dems are too scared to complain and lose their (limited) grip on power.

The real schism in the Coalition will come over something far more trivial, like a 5p rise in garlic prices, or an 'unsustainable' level of Observer readership. Or something.
(zeppelin boy, Fri 24 Dec 2010, 15:51, 1 reply)

Jan Moir / Richard Littlejohn...
...for constantly reminding us that, whilst we all may act the cnut at times, it takes years of tireless dedication to the art to be a complete, and utter, cnut!

Plus every Tory politician, Lib-Dem sell-out, banker, city trader and Rupert Murdoch - just for good measure.
(minimalist ..., Fri 24 Dec 2010, 15:49, 7 replies)

To hell with the topic, have a Christmas disaster
Years ago, my driving instructor, Brian (for that was his proverbial) was going out with the landlady of a pub. Yay for him, the spawny get. Anyway, late one Dec 24th evening, a particularly loud group of 'barely 18' punters finally left at kicking out time. Well, ejected really as they had tried their hardest to induce some sort of lock-in.
After 5 mins, they had buggered off and Brian was helping tidy up when he noticed a flickering outside. He looked out of the window and noticed a fire across the road in the churchyard.
"Bastard!" he thought and assumed the kids they had kicked out had decided to set something ablaze in spite. He grabbed a long hose and dragged it out of the pub across the narrow lane, shouting back to the landlady to "Phone the fire brigade!"
He started hosing down the fire, which he had caught quite early as it was still quite small. Just then, the church doors opened and the vicar was standing there along with a good dozen or so members of the Midnight Mass congregation, watching Brian suddenly realise that there were no arsonists after all and that he had in fact just extinguished and thoroughly soaked the Yule Log.

He wasn't very popular after that.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Fri 24 Dec 2010, 14:29, 2 replies)

Scaramanga
Best Christmas villain of them all.

Merry festiveness one and all :-D
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Fri 24 Dec 2010, 13:12, Reply)

Douglas Adams
for still being dead
( Steerable_forehead Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration,don't fail me now, Fri 24 Dec 2010, 12:58, 3 replies)

Whoever it was who gave me Norovirus.
They can fuck right off.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 24 Dec 2010, 12:39, 1 reply)