new qotw
i think ive figured out what that question is!

mine would be:

"third time lucky with the nicer lady instructer instead of the bloke that only passed the ladys"
(mr ruffles, Fri 11 Mar 2005, 8:27, Reply)

But Humpty....
.... That means that all the world will benefit, as with no QOTW to mull over maybe we'll all get some work done rather than arseing about on the net all day.

Or maybe not...

How about this for QOTW? Insert your own answer and let everyone guess the question?
Mine would be, "With a fish buttie in my right hand in my dads ford sierra in 1987".

njoy
( ogwen69 has returned from Reddit, Fri 11 Mar 2005, 8:12, Reply)

First time...
....that a friday morning has revealed a distinct Lack of new QOTW...

I feel sordid and used...

EDIT: Wierd how you get so used to something, and start to depend on it. kind of a geek-addiction I s'pose.

might have to go find a left handed website while I wait for the new QOTW.
( Humpty Dumpty was Pushed Is unaware of having any limits., Fri 11 Mar 2005, 6:58, Reply)

Boxit>>I know what u mean mate, but there is hope
Just a note to let you know boxit, I too have been a magnet for headcases. However, your stated desire of a woman is out there, as I have met the most fantastic woman only this week and not a moment too soon as was beginning to lose hope.

Fear not my man, ur damsel is there, go get her!!
(McPhisto, Fri 11 Mar 2005, 0:21, Reply)

I hasten to prefix this with a big NOT ME BUT A FRIEND
a rather portly chap [think John Candy in Uncle Buck]. He was very shy and still a virgin at 22. In university he becomes *friends* with this slightly removed, shy and studious girl. Their dating is bland and pure until one night they go to the infamous Sankey's in Manchester.

This night they throw caution to the wind and decide to test ecstacy [the drug, not the emotion of pleasure - and i add i do not condone their choice].

Having danced in a fury until the wee hours they returned to his place at about 6am. All loved up they decided to offer themselves to each other. What happened next is the stuff of legends;
Her on top, he enters her and starts thrusting away. Unfortunately they both blacked out and the experience was somewhat limited. The next afternoon when he awakes my friend awakes to find the remains of his girlfriends virginity staining his crotch, as well as her fecal matter

Yes, she had shite herself. On top of him. She had done the chivalrous thing and fled. So, covered in a mix of blood, sweat and shite he proceeds to stand up out of bed only to slip in the mess and knock himself out on the bedside table. His appearance in the doorway, shit stained and covered in blood [his and hers now] , I hate to admit provoked only tears of mirth. He recounted the story and by the time we had him washed off and in the emergency room for stitches his story was already enshrined in infamy.

His come down was not pleasant
(monkeyseemonkeydo, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 23:07, Reply)

Oh boy.....
I was 17, he was a little younger (like 'em young - my hubby's four years younger!), did "it" in the middle of watching Quantum Leap while my parents were downstairs. My two friends arrived almost immediately afterwards, and the following morning, one of them dragged me off to the family planning clinic. All clear!

Aaaah....young love.
(CryptJo, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 22:28, Reply)

Have you ever seen me dancing? Like, really dancing!
Nearly managed to lose mine with a lass (F) I was going out with for a while when I was 15 (she was 13), we both wanted to, but it never happened (I was too shy to stick it in - it was a month before I even kissed her FFS!). Her mum broke it off when F came back home one day with "love bites" on her neck - the mum wouldn't let me see her again and I was too scared to go behind her back. Fuck, I quite liked her too.

Eventually though, about a week before my 17th birthday I was out at the bestest rock club in England - The Mayfair in Newcastle, which has since been ripped down and turned into some piece of crap poncy bar, restaurant and cinema bollocks, bastards. There I was dancing away with a big bunch of my mates, there she was in said big bunch of mates (well when I say mates, some of my lot knew people, who knew people, etc. and we were all dancing in one group). Anyhoo, there's me headbanging away and she comes over to me and says "I like yer dancin'". So I turn and start dancing with her for a bit. At the end of the night we leave that place and as I do, I wander whichever way people are going, end up getting in a taxi with her and a mate, head back towards her's, dropping her mate off on the way. After a bit of chatting etc. (can't remember what the etc. was - it was ages ago) we end up getting nekkid in bed and started getting down to business. I can't remember the whole details, but it lasted for fucking ages (my fault really as I decided that cumming the once wasn't enough - just kept it in and kept pumping away). After a while I was wondering how much longer it was going to take. Anyhoo, I eventually unloaded my man juice for a second time and we fiddled up and went to sleep.

I saw her a few times after that in the nightclub, but not gone back with her for "health reasons". About nine months later - eight months after dropping a sprog (apparently she was already up the duff when I had a go) I ended up going back to her's again for another go. She had aquired a colour TV by then (previously she'd had a black and white one).

Did I mention she was a bit of a nutter? On the way back to her's the first time she told me how she had been arrested for throwing crockery at the police and how she'd recently got out of an asylum or something. Then the morning after the second time the Jehovas Witnesses came round for her regular visit, but they didn't stay as she had company.

What is it with me attracting nutcases? ...along with older women, lasses already in a relationship, gay blokes, lesbians, etc. (please note, just because I attract them, it doesn't mean I do the dirty deed with them - although I did de-virginise a lesbian once).

Are there any sane, single, gorgeous, young lasses out there looking for a bit of good loving and maybe a bit of the kinky stuff? or maybe I'm too picky?

I've never had any complaints and I've had several complements recently.

Length, girth, apologise? Bollocks to that.
(boxit, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 21:39, Reply)

Military College + Nurse + Finger = Mayhem
South Carolina, an all-male military college. We constantly cruised the neighboring co-ed schools College of Charleston and the Medical University of South Carolina...one night I pulled in a big way.

She was a nursing student, absolutely beautiful and oozing the Southern Charm you think only exists in movies. I met her and KNEW I was in love. So, fast-forward to our first date...pizza and some beers at a Chinese Take-Away called "the Magic Wok" where you could get served if you were 8, as long as you were wearing a Citadel uniform.

We go back to her apartment and get nikked. As I am removing my trousers, I remember a caution from a mate at school: "with a nurse you have to watch out for errant fingers." He said it just like that. Matter of fact.

Well, I hit my stride...I am hammering away, assisted by a certain lack of sensitivity brought on by alcohol and I feel the most hideous thing I have ever felt in my life. While I was happily hammering away, School fight song (Dixie) in my head, visions of a special parade, just for me..she had slipped a finger into the old bunger.

I was so geeked out I politely removed myself from atop the beautiful young thing and got dressed, WALKING back to campus. I was ashamed. My rear had been penetrated. I felt like a circus freak. Until my buddies admonition came back to me...so I told him and he laughed so hard I thought he was going to piss himself.

Next Day: Standing at formation, orders being read over a loud speaker to roughly 2,000 other cadets. "Corporal ----- is advised that taking a finger in your ass does not make you gay." Cue hilarious laughter amongst 2,000 fellow cadets and my face, as red as the Soviet flag.

I still havent talked to that 'buddy' since.

Barstard.

Sic Semper Tyrannis, I make no apologies for length.

Sean
( Citadel Because the world needs less morons, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 21:35, Reply)

In a park when I was 15
I've never walked home alone since
(le renard, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 21:27, Reply)

well...
I lost mine after I posted the fifteenth "witty" response to this question pretending to be involved with Michael Jackson. The guy in my profile hunted me down.
( kingofpork is the king of pork, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 20:31, Reply)

my teddy bear alf looks a bit lopsided since he took my cherry

( You drive like a mong in a dodgem today is, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 20:02, Reply)

hilariously,
i seem to be completely taken off guard every time
a girl decides she likes me, stupid bastard that i am.
(Slurpy The Frog, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 19:57, Reply)

16 only been with 2 girls
Still got my V-plates in-tact... Why do I get the fridgid girls? Hopefully the next will be a bit more adventurous
(newcustomerserviceteam, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 19:46, Reply)

22 years old...
... and there is no way I can honestly answer this question.

'Nuff said....

Hello? Ladies?! Is anyone out there?
(David S Green, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 19:27, Reply)

First Post!!! Wooo
Lost it to my boyfriend of 3 weeks, me 18 him 17. Didn't hurt and still together after 10 months and still very active, woo and yay!
(purplefairy, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 17:55, Reply)

I was 13 at the time... I remember it well...
I was on my dinner break at school with a few friends and we decided to go down a deserted beach and muck about for a bit.. play a bit of footy, or kiss chase, with some of the girls who with us at the time.. there were 3 girls, two were absolutely gorgeous, and one was a big, fat, ugly, spotty, smelly cunt called Alison.. She confessed her undying love for me as we were walking back to school, and said if i wanted, she would suck my cock. I gets to thinkin "well, she may be a rancid monster, but i won't have to look at her, and no-one would find out would they?" so i diverted with her to the nearest place where there were definately no people.

She then started to play a few notes on the pink piccolo, which was great, this bint was hungry for cock! it was like she hadn't eaten in months - she was like an animal. She then said she wanted me to fuck her as hard as i could, so without further ado, i asked if we could go doggystyle for the first position, as it ws something i'd always fantasised about(it was really so i didn't have to look at her face, her arse was better looking). Next thing I know, a load of my mates from different classes came round the corner to find me blowing my load all over her bum.

Needless to say, i never - to this day - lived it down. : (
(fat wiSe Jim, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 16:13, Reply)

Not nice
Not virginity as such, but the first time I gave someone a blow job he came so hard and in such volume it came out through my nose. I was twelve (and so was he) and had been "messing about with each other" since we were eight, and had found out some rumours about "sucking" so we decided to give it a go. I was quite horrified at the time.
(SneakyPete, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 15:54, Reply)

go round the back....
my first girl (bless) would only allow me to fuck her in the shitter. she was dead scared of getting preggerz.

she became obsessed with her anal orofice.
it became too much and i resorted to inserting all manner of household objects into her rectum.

the favourite was the handle of a tefal non stick frying pan which she kept under her bed, along with a giant jar of vas.

it didnt last.
(bovrilboy, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 15:12, Reply)

it's funny
but girls will shag the lowest, scumiest, ugliest most fucked up bastard they can find, but won't ever shag a geek in a million years. Well 30 years to be exact. I've always been the surrogate boyfriend for when they're real boyfriend messes with their heads. The trouble is I'm only interested in girls that I actually like (crazy I know), but I'm too frigging nice/inept to manipulate them into moving me out of the 'friend' catagory until it's too late. Bitter? me? never.
Still.. at least I don't have a bruised cock *shrinks*

ps actually I'm a bit ruined since the only girl I've ever truly adored has moved as far away as you possibly could short of the Arctic (coinincidence?), so other girls seem a bit lame at the moment (present company excluded of course!)
(Vectrex, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 14:21, Reply)

QotW
Err.. isn't there usually a new one by now?
( Fire & Forget it's the only way to be sure, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 14:21, Reply)

mine took me about 2 months
went out with a girl when she was 15, me 16, and about 2months into said relationship, we both thought "ok, let's do it" but she was a bit immature, so we ended up just putting it in (too far up, no lube - painful for her ahahaha - serves her right) and finally shagged good and proper about 8weeks later coz she hurt so much. don't know if that was a compliment (:-S)
(5ifty0, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 13:55, Reply)

Lost it all in one night...
Lost my girly & straight virginity in the same night. Brilliant!
I was 17, & a good little christian girl up until that night.
End of school year party, tried alcohol for the first time, proceeded to get incredibly drunk, tried weed for the first time too & got quite stoned... I can't remember much of the details after this but I am reliably informed that I shagged a girl under a table beside the packed bar, then got a bit too hot & heavy with some guy on the dancefloor. We got thrown out of the place so I went back to his...sobered up suddenly in the middle of the night & it took me a while to realise why I was covered on blood...

His mum left me home in the morning.

Ended up going out with them both for a few weeks,during which the three of us would meet up & get pissed/stoned/shag alot. Sometimes all three.

Good times...
(deadly, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 12:11, Reply)

17 years old
Went to a mates house new years eve. His flat mate was there, one thing led to another we were sharing same arm chair...hand ended up in her pants...

Went to the pub...absolutley slaughtered by this time. Got off with her in the pub...she collapsed at the bar once talking to her friend.

Went home with her early, got off again on the sofa. Eventually she said "I'm going to bed". Not taking the hint I stayed downstairs...her flat mate comes home..

Wheres Amy? "In Bed" i reply.. "Why arent you there??" "I wasn't invited"

He does nothing more than stompt to the base of the stairs and bellow "Amy can xxxx come to bed?"

"Yup" the reply comes

Went upstairs, pitch black room..made embarassing small talk for a moment until she said the romantic words "Take em off"

Didnt need telling twice, she got a jonny chucked it to me. Had a bit of a getting up issue intially from all the alchohol but eventually did the business...not very memorable.

Her flat mate told me later "She said you were pretty good" Was pleased with result.

Happy new years eve indeed! Shame her room was like a bag ladies rubbish heap.
(Hoppkins, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 11:38, Reply)

Ahh, the first in a long line of disasters encounters
I was 18 and had been saving myself for a perfect girl (read as was shit at pulling because I'm too shy, still am) and one night I went out to a local club, saw a girl and she walked over to me and kissed me. We went outside and I thought yes, I'm going to shag. She asked me what time it was so I looked at my phone. It was gone. I had it a few seconds earlier. Shit, so I run back into the club to find my phone. Spend the rest of the night looking for my phone, and the girl I had just run from. Couldn't find either so I settle on just having a normal good night out. But my luck changed, I met another girl. The second girl was a friend of mine, I knew she had a thing for me but it was one way. But I was feeling low. And horny. So we went back to her place near the club and stuck on a DVD, Reposessed with Steve Martin if you're interested. Please note, NEVER try having sex to a comedy. So we start getting down to business and I start pumping away. and I'm still pumping. Yep still pumping. She's moaning. Pumping. She's fallen asleep. I'm still pumping. Yep she's definatly asleep. What do I do. Still pumping. Oooo, I'm close. false alarm. Still pumping. Getting knackered. Still pumping. Sod it. Flop.

My first time and I didn't even get the good bit. It isn't the last time that happened either, for some reason I can't cum in missionary position.

Found out a few days later my friend had lost his mobile after some young girl came over to him and gave him a molest and stole it. Described the same bitch that kissed me a the begining of the night. Bitch.
( bobzarkoff, Thu 10 Mar 2005, 11:32, Reply)