Me too
I went to the same school, but I'm older, and in my day we had to march into school breakfasts, too. And dinner on Thursdays, even without a wind section.
(steer, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:57, Reply)

greeting magpies
for good luck. my wife thinks i am crazy.
( Plomien is Polish for flame, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:53, Reply)

Me and my sister used to have this odd tradition
If you saw a green Citroen, you could pinch the other person and they weren't allowed to pinch you back.

This might explain why I didn't have many friends as a child.
( Pachey, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:44, Reply)

Stretching it a bit, but...
...Taco Tickler "Honking horn when driving through tunnel" reminded me of a friend who told me once that one of his hobbies was driving fast and honking his horn.

I've made a tradition of laughing at it, I suppose...
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:44, Reply)

good one
I religously get p*ssed every weekend and try to shag women.





Joke - Wot do you call a chav in a box?
- init
(Axe murderer, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:44, Reply)

Whenever my brother and I hear someone say 'it's alive',
for whatever reason, we lock eyes with each other and say "it's alive... it's ALIVE... IT'S ALLLLIIIIIIIIIVE!", rising in volume and urgency, like in the Frankenstein film.

Then we both stop and bask in the knowledge of a job well done.

Also, whenever my mum and I see a Norbert Dentressangle lorry, we both point to it and say "yay, Norbert Dentressangle!" We also try to guess what's inside any unmarked or ambiguously-labelled lorries.

EDIT: Speaking of lorries, someone's post re: Eddie Stobart lorries reminded me of another one. Whenever I see a Stobart lorry, I feel compelled to check whether the driver's wearing his tie. If he isn't, I tell everyone present how shocking this insubordinate man is.
( Bob Todd whee, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:43, Reply)

Not so much a tradition.....
... but a habit. Shouting jump at women and children on bridges
(mr rob, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:43, Reply)

dib dib dib! nob nob nob!
As a kid, I used to belong to the cubs, in a particularly dodgy council estate in the wonderful town of Slough.

Every year we'd all go on pack holiday to the new forest, and stay in the church hall in a small village. About 30 cubs, Akela, and the various other adult helpers who Akela had told us were his sons.

The first ever night, on my first ever pack holiday, Akela told us we were going to play football in the church hall before we went to bed.

Hooray!

Then the cubs started taking all their clothes off.

As us new kids froze in fear and bewilderment, some of the older boys kindly told us that it was "traditional" for us to all play football stark bollock naked. As all the adults, i.e. Akela, and his "sons" (not all of whom, with hindsight, actually looked much like him) stood around and watched us.

Afterwards we had to queue up and file past them, still naked, on the way to the showers. Any boy who displayed a state of erectiveness was taken to one side because this was very naughty. I don't know what punishment they received, but they tended to look a little shellshocked afterwards. Thank christ it never happened to me...

Needless to say, Akela told us all that this "tradition" was a special cub scout secret and so we must never tell our parents...
(Ali Bongo 9000 Ali Bongo 9000, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:42, Reply)

Not very good, but...
...when my mate Pob used to live with me, whenever we went anywhere in the car we had to either make a word or acronym out of the letters of car number plates as we saw them. For instance, JBW 654A would become something like "John Benson's White Arse".

I still do it now, occasionally.

And enjoy it.

[insert witty length joke here]
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:41, Reply)

where do I start
ah.. I suppose here.

anyway..

whenever one of us gets a new car, we have this odd thing where at some unearthly hour of the morning, (when theres no-one about) we take it and drive it flat out up the 6 miles of motorway to find out "what she does" then we never drive above the speed limit again, coz we know what the car will do, and we don't have to prove anything to ourselves...

only thing is, the plod put 2 speed cameras on the road...

bastards.

now we see how fast we can go between cameras.

:-)

then all the usual things us prod's living in a catholic area do during the 12th.

we hide.
( TBL I posted this on, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:39, Reply)

Quite sad realy
When getting cash out I always order the notes by value then serial number with the queen facing front (I have no idea why)

Making my GF kiss me at kissing gates befor letting her though.



Every christmas taking on a part time job as a bouncer on the no 34 bus to loogabrooga that doesn't take scottish money and denying access to people with trainers on because my mother used to use them to sneek into my room with cups of tea whilest I was wanking and because they make it too easy for people to jump on bandwaggons.
(timberwolf0122 is turkey volume guessing man! Guessing the volumes in terms of turkeys since, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:39, Reply)

Also sad
Trying to miaow at the same time as the cat in the credits for Coronation Street. Haven't managed it yet despite extensive coaching from the b/f.
(BearWithLittleBrain, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:32, Reply)

Hopelessly sad
If any of you are avid viewers of Emmerdale, and I'm sure you all are, you'll have noticed there are two bridges that feature in the opening sequence.

It is something of a tradition now to shout 'BRIDGE!' as soon as the first bridge hoves into view.

Think this originated on a drunken night with my gf, where she thought it'd be fun to shout the name of every object she saw. And it sort of developed from there.
(sporky, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:27, Reply)

Every Day
First thing in the morning I wake up, walk to the bathroom and crimp one off.

I thank you
(myohmy, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:26, Reply)

Each year on my birthday
I always give my pet dog a good rutting, whilst listening to 'You're My Favourite Waste of Time' by mulleted singer Owen Paul.


Owen Paul, I know shocking isn't it. i'm sorry.
(nappy rash, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:21, Reply)

Whenever I meet someone for the first time
I have an irrisistable urge to grasp their opposing hand and pump it up and down, to make sure it's real. I also give it a bit of a squeeze, to transfer any bogeys or sweat I may be carrying.

I believe in Russia they hug eachother a lot.

Length, girth, whatever. It's the flavour that matters.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:13, Reply)

Winter maintenance
although more along the lines of "lies parents tell you".

On visiting grandparents a week before the winter solstice celebration* we passed a number of workmen removing rubbish from the central reserve. My sister asked why they were doing it the week before the yule festival, to which my dad replied it's traditional to clean up the roads before major public holidays so they look nice for all the people making special journeys. My sister believed this unquestioningly. She was in her twenties.

The best bit is that I now work in highway design/maintenance, and it's actually true! (OK, true in a taking a fairly radical interpretation of the facts way)


*this is funnier if you've read my other post, or possibly not.
(Throbbe, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:12, Reply)

question of the week
In the tradition of "Question of the week", which normally invokes plenty of humorous entries, which stops me from having to do any work all week;
this weeks question is piss poor, stop it now! and start something with more potential !
(Betty Boothroyd's Love custard Tourettes at the KOB, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:09, Reply)

It Tradition
Apologies for lack of length... arf arf..

Shoot me now!
(The Duke of Pontefract, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:08, Reply)

In New Zealand
It's traditional to raise your hands above your head when going across a level crossing.

All very well, except when the fucking bus driver does it too.
( Pachey, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:08, Reply)

Every year...
my family and I visit the point in a river where it cascades over stone 'steps' to increase/decrease it's speed or whatever, I suppose that's our wier-ed tradition. Hohoho.






I am very very sorry.
(Jam Mister Geordie wants to build bridges, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:01, Reply)

weird 'game' tradition
every sunday when we drove back from my nan's house, we'd pass a business park with a huge waterfall on full display. There was a game we'd play, when you'd see it, if you were the first person to see it you said "waterfall, i said it first", the 2nd person would say "waterfall i said it second" and so on. the last person to say this is the loser.
(wayneofthedead Dale Winton was my dad, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:01, Reply)

Kids in the car...
...when going under a bridge, we had to sing "Under the bridge we go, Oh Solomon Grundy! (tealeaves)"

My dad made the first bit up. My sister added the tealeaves and it became a tradition.
( Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 13:00, Reply)

weird traditions
every year in my village they have a three legged race to raise funds for the local charity.
the only problem is that you have to have 2 drinks in each pub, and considering that there are about 14 pubs in my village it can be very painful by the end. although most people go for a lap of honour.
(THE_TRUFFLE_PIG, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 12:59, Reply)

fitba
You have to be born into football to really get it I think - does not apply to me I'm afraid. Didn't stop me watching the champions league final and going into town for coming of the team/cup... Fake and proud! Champ-eee-yuns! :)
(bloodyHassocks, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 12:55, Reply)

Hurrah
After having nowt to say in the last few QOTW I am sure you have missed/not noticed.

1. Honking horn when driving through tunnel
2. B4 my parents split every God Friday was spent in Bournemouth, why?? no frickin idea.
3. Right shoe on first every time.
4. Crab on New Years Day.
5. We get xmas presents every year from "the Tree Fairy"


Dont know if it is a tradition but whenever someone say the name of a crap celeb (R.Williams or C.Deeley are great examples) I have to say "is a w@nker".

When having sexual intercourse it is a tradition of mine to be absolute rubbish. I counteract this by not making it last very long, gotta think of the ladies.

length? that is the shittest tradition
(Taco Tickler, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 12:53, Reply)

Fair enough...
While I'm at it, my boyfriend is one (a scouser) and his twunting tradition is to watch eeeeevery LFC game...
How come?
You tell me.
( liverbird, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 12:51, Reply)

wired tradition
we have a wired tradition in our house

"green and yellow to live, brown to earth, blue to f*ck"
(montyzuma, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 12:51, Reply)

hey la - Liverbird
Nothing wrong with being a scouser, but am not one. Was trying to fend off crap scouser jokes in advance - I've lived in Liverpool far too long to have patience for them
(bloodyHassocks, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 12:48, Reply)

public school was rife with this kind of thing...
... but possibly the wierdest and most impenetrable was on pancake day, when an event called the Greaze took place. Under the eyes of the Dean of Westminster Abbey in full ceremonial dress, and other dressed-up local worthies (local to the Palace of Westminster), boys from each house would compete for honour and glory for their house by scrapping over a horsehair pancake which would be tossed in their midst from a big iron frying pan.

An incredibly violent melee would ensue, and whoever was in possession of all their limbs and the largest portion of pancake by weight was the winner. Quite what they won escapes me, but the face of the Dean during the fight is burned on my memory forever - he looked like the whole thing gave off a very bad smell.

The other random bit of it was that after several deaths in the 17th and 18th centuries the school had special dispensation that if anyone died during the event that was ok. Which is nice.

The worst part is that most of those people I saw flailing around on the floor after a giant pancake are on their way to running the country now. This frightens me.
(sticks Errol flynn in female form, Thu 28 Jul 2005, 12:47, Reply)