morning

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 0:01, Reply)

can you keep the noise down some of us are up at 5am
cheers
( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 0:06, Reply)

Cheers

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 5:46, Reply)

I can’t stop pilfering from other people’s plates – but don’t even think about grabbing my chips.
(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 7:57, Reply)

I have to give him his due, you always know it's him

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 9:04, Reply)

'Voodoo' Chiles, I assume

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 10:24, Reply)

Point: proved.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 10:25, Reply)

smell my fanny

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 6:44, Reply)

Give it a wash m8, it smells like week-old kippers left out in the sun

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 8:05, Reply)

+ this is vile

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 9:31, Reply)

Morning

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 8:04, Reply)

yo

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 8:05, Reply)

New cat has arrived
he's very sweet. Original cat is fucking livid about the situation.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 8:07, Reply)

I used to have two cats but I got them at the same time
If I introduced a new cat to the one I have now he’d probably leave
( Cheers Cheers, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 8:14, Reply)

The cat rescue shelter is advising us through the ordeal
the old cat does get on with one of the neighbour's moggies so we recon she will adjust. May take a while tho.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 9:58, Reply)

invest in calming hormone collars
and room spray
(piss and shit, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 10:28, Reply)

and a decent pet like a fucking dog you moron

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:20, Reply)

We did think about that but thought no
dogs are for cunts.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:23, Reply)

that's true. dogs are for cunts. cats are for wankers.

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:42, Reply)

Fucken' right and don't you forget it.

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 14:06, Reply)

forget what?

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 14:14, Reply)

We may do but it's early days
and Aggie (resident) is not freaking out too much, she's just not happy with this other cat in a cage in the living room.

Boswon (new addition) is very affectionate and friendly but a bit jumpy. He was found as a stray in a park so I wonder if he escaped someone's home or maybe was dumped. He's very happy to be in a house around people and he was quite chilled to see another cat so he won't be a problem.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:29, Reply)

despite all my rage i am still just a cat in a cage

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 12:19, Reply)

Boston, not Boswon. Bowson would be a great cat's name tho.

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 14:08, Reply)

Yeah I had a similar situation with my ex

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 9:33, Reply)

Did she jump over the garden fence in a huff
and shit in the neighbour's flower bed too?
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 9:56, Reply)

that was me m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 10:24, Reply)

You used to go out with 2can?
I sense the dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-diddly-dums at the end of Eastenders about to play out...
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:20, Reply)

I sure did

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:38, Reply)

Did he take your temperature without using his hands at all?

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 14:09, Reply)

we all have mate
he's a right slag
(piss and shit, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 12:04, Reply)

that slag broke my achy beaky heart

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 12:22, Reply)

has broken, like the first morning, blackbird has spoken, like the first bird

( Octo I ruin everything., Thu 30 Apr 2026, 8:26, Reply)

Bit racist mate

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 8:32, Reply)

Young and female blackbirds identify as brown, it's woke gone mad

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 9:11, Reply)

Not racist enough

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:05, Reply)

Exactly the right amount of racist

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:29, Reply)

morning
I have a Teams call tomorrow with someone who was a few years below me at uni. Haven't seen her for about 25 years, last time was when she got off with another uni friend shortly before he came out as gay. Wonder if I should start the call with that.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 9:11, Reply)

I mean, yes

( Octo I ruin everything., Thu 30 Apr 2026, 10:28, Reply)

"Turned anyone else recently?"

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 10:34, Reply)

absolutely

(piss and shit, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 10:29, Reply)

I do enjoy these Lego Iranian raps. Top propaganda

( mongychops, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 10:38, Reply)

They're smashing it on that front eh

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:04, Reply)

Yeah, churning them out. Getting loads of views

( mongychops, Thu 30 Apr 2026, 11:16, Reply)