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# Conclusive proof of the goodness of crumpets and the evilness of muffins!


case for the defense of crumpets rests

Edit: I see some clever chap is already selling the t-shirt New window clicky
(I helped save b3ta! gingerbenji wrote a book http://goo.gl/8UiGjd, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:22, archived)
# you are
so right. i was just looking for crumpoet recipes, but it turns out you need crumpoet rings. booooo.
(I helped save b3ta! stouffer, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:24, archived)
# crumpoets.
I bet they write lovely happy warm poems.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:24, archived)
# i would
change it but i like crumpoets better.
(I helped save b3ta! stouffer, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:26, archived)
# and more proof
that they're better than muffootballhooligins.
(I helped save b3ta! stup0t, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:29, archived)
# "A crumpet is a lovely thing
And buttered it’s a winner
I like to toast them piping hot
And eat lots for my dinner."
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:36, archived)
# "A crumpet spread with honey gold
Is quite a treat for tea
Or else with marmite (so I’m told)
But honey’s fine for me."
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:38, archived)
# "A crumpet from the toaster
Should be golden brown above
With little burnt bits underneath
‘Cos that’s the kind we love."
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:41, archived)
# all good
apart from the marmite bit. eeeeeeewwwwwww.
(I helped save b3ta! stouffer, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:41, archived)
# A crumpet
covered with sliced cheese,
and placed beneath a grill,
Is enough to give a hungry man
a culinary thrill.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:43, archived)
# crumpoets
haha!
(I helped save b3ta! Banana, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:25, archived)
# muffins are king for eggs benedict
but crumpets with toasted cheese is the don of all toasted snacks.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:28, archived)
# the don
Gorgon?
(I helped save b3ta! isthisyou?, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:31, archived)
# the don as in.....
actually, I dont know wherethat comes from, just at uni, things that were the best, were "the don"
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:34, archived)
# Innit Italian?
means the boss or head of something...
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:34, archived)
# as in Don Corleone
I suspect.
(I helped save b3ta! adverse_camber, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:36, archived)
# it's patois
suckaz
(I helped save b3ta! isthisyou?, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:37, archived)
# as in
the article don gorgon? Dem ting me understand seen?

etc.


nothing to do with dragons though.
(I helped save b3ta! crouchingbadger, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:40, archived)
# as in
(DON) GORGON: outstanding dreadlocks, a person who is respected (2,6)
(I helped save b3ta! isthisyou?, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:49, archived)
# but what is patois?
and bare in mind I have a Stephen Pinker book on my desk!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:42, archived)
# eh?
this is patois.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:52, archived)
# delicious
on toast, i hear
(I helped save b3ta! isthisyou?, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:53, archived)
# how is that different from a creole then?
.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:54, archived)
# because
This is the definition of Creole.

You lazy bugger - now bookmark that site.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:58, archived)
# thats different to what my book says.
It says creole is second generation hybridisation of any language. So there!!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 16:03, archived)
# Yup,
actually I go with Pinker.

It's different from pigeon, mind.
(Amerella, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 16:07, archived)
# Language formed
from a european and an african language.
(Amerella, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:59, archived)
# oh
not this?
(I helped save b3ta! crouchingbadger, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:55, archived)
# thank you both.
I had an inkling it was that...
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:38, archived)
# why, you...
(I helped save b3ta! adverse_camber, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:40, archived)
# crumpets
with butter and Marmite (TM) are yummier!!
(I helped save b3ta! Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:31, archived)
# cool!
you've been a member for less than 10 minutes. welcome aboard, pull up a kitten.

[edit] well, you have now. but the welcome still stands...
(I helped save b3ta! new_matt, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:38, archived)
# crumpoets with
butter and honey. loads of honey. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
(I helped save b3ta! stouffer, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:31, archived)
# Honey is horrible
FACT!
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:32, archived)
# .
It comes out of a bee's bum y'know.
Uuurgh!

13% of FACT... I'm not actually sure which part of a bee it comes out of
(I helped save b3ta! stup0t, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:34, archived)
# heathen
hunny is fantastic.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:34, archived)
# what is
"heathen honey"?
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:39, archived)
# har bloody har
: )

I imagine if such a thing existed, it would be produced by big bees that swore and didnt appreciate art, or queuing sensibly.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:43, archived)
# are you humming because you are in fact a bee?
Or have you forgotten the words?
(I helped save b3ta! Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:33, archived)
# because
i glued my lips together.
(I helped save b3ta! stouffer, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:35, archived)
# Hee Hee!
What did you want to do that for?
(I helped save b3ta! Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:36, archived)
# i was indulging
in some perfectly innocent solvent abuse and it all went horribly wrong.
(I helped save b3ta! stouffer, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:43, archived)
# it stops the goblins
from stealing his teeth
(I helped save b3ta! new_matt, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:44, archived)
# That's been photo shopped
don't believe a word. Muffins unite!
(I helped save b3ta! Banana, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:24, archived)
# Muffins are the best
Bacon, sausage & fried egg muffin with brown sauce.
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:32, archived)
# muffins
are good, but you would never catch a crumpoet stooping to egg mcness.
(I helped save b3ta! stouffer, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:32, archived)
# there is not, nor
art there be, nothing so exalted on the face of gods great earth. As that prince of foods. THE MUFFIN
- and frank zappa is never wrong
(Noodlejunkie, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:32, archived)
# Girl
you thought it was a man, but it was a muffin.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:37, archived)
[challenge entry] you hung around till you found that he didn't know nothin
Woo! another zappa fan!
(Noodlejunkie, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:40, archived)
# Are you sure
thats a compo entry?
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:45, archived)
# I like
both. A lot. Mmmmmm..

Crumpets must be sufficiently scorched though. We're talking in the toaster twice here!
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:26, archived)
# give me a woo for crumpets
and a yay for niceness
(widgysoft, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:31, archived)
# but neither are a match
for the mighty scone
I'm for the muffins.
(I helped save b3ta! Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:31, archived)
# scones?
You are kidding, aren't you?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:32, archived)
# no
Scones are the new rock'n'roll.
A cheese scone is easily superior to a bloody crumpet. Probably only just edge it over muffins though.
Does the queen serve crumpets? Does she bollocks.
(I helped save b3ta! Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:35, archived)
# you are
insane.
(I helped save b3ta! stouffer, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:36, archived)
# inane
perhaps
(I helped save b3ta! Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:40, archived)
# No, no,
there's nothing like a nice cheese scone.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:37, archived)
# Aaaaaaa!
I dunno who started it, but scones, cheese and scones don't mix well...
(n@man n@man, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:39, archived)
# Maybe
you should tell my mum that

She bakes the best cheese scones

hmmm, home cooking
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:56, archived)
# you are quite, quite wrong.
But you're also much bigger than me so:

Gosh, I hadn't thought of it like that - you've got a good point there. Ta!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:44, archived)
# How much bigger?
I've just challenged him to "bring it on"...

/worried
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:50, archived)
# Both
easily trounce scones, i'm afraid.
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:32, archived)
# seconded.
(I helped save b3ta! stouffer, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:33, archived)
# scones are for old grannies
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:35, archived)
# hear hear
i got told off for correcting my teacher when I was 6. She pronounce them to rhyme with tone whereas any fule kno it rhymes with gone.
(I helped save b3ta! adverse_camber, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:37, archived)
# the Queen says 'scone'
plebs (i.e. myself) say 'scon'
(I helped save b3ta! Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:39, archived)
# I say
eughhhh! *ptooie*

(sound of me spitting scone out upon tasting it & realising its not a muffin)
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:41, archived)
# that's fighting talk
round my way
(I helped save b3ta! Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:38, archived)
# Bring it on,
scone-boy!
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:39, archived)
# real men
eat scones
(I helped save b3ta! Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:46, archived)
# Well, muffin can be used as a sexual euphemism,
so there!
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:52, archived)
# with
crumpet
with any luck
(I helped save b3ta! L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:56, archived)
# Bagels
are better i think. Bacon ones... Hmmm.
(I helped save b3ta! Wifey, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:36, archived)
# Don't you start!
It'll be rock buns next.
(I helped save b3ta! Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:46, archived)
# I vote for "batches"
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:48, archived)
# actually
those drop scone pancakey things are alright
(I helped save b3ta! Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Tue 10 Dec 2002, 15:50, archived)