Only in Bath...
Would you find written on some blue wooden construction boards:

"Please make this really pretty"

In yellow, flowery, curly script. I can picture the local chavs grouping together to drink tea instead of cider. Other than that though Bath is devoid of any interesting graffiti.
(Root, Fri 4 May 2007, 11:11, Reply)

One more!
There was a WARNING sign somewhere, and someone had scrawled underneath it:

"listening to Muse will make you gay"

Chortle!
(petite chaussure, Fri 4 May 2007, 11:09, Reply)

Walking around Oxford
My favourite ever piece of graffiti simply reads.

"Capitalism is boring"

Not only this, but it is written in chalk, yet it's still there after a year.

On a more crude note, in the toilet of the law faculty, there is a detailed debate about Israeli foreign policy spanning the entire height of a toilet door. To the side, someone has written. "Gentleman, this is a toilet, your debate here is about as welcome as my steaming turd in the middle of Question Time."
(LickOutTheJamsMotherfuckers!, Fri 4 May 2007, 11:06, Reply)

Salford Student union:
i like cats
they are fluffy and nice
i like cats
yum

It still cheers me up today that a building falling down in the middle of a depraved area like Salford, someone can write fluffy niceness on a wall.
(menashem, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:59, Reply)

toilet tennis?
In a pub in Aldeburgh on the wall to the right of the urinals it says:

"Enjoy toilet tennis? See other wall."

Of course, when you look left there's nothing there, so you look back at the graffiti. And repeat a few more times for good measure/confusion.

hohoho.
(Professor Plum did it with the lead pipe in the billiard room on, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:58, Reply)

Seen at work


on a bit of old kit in the lab. Sorry for excessive biggitude.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:57, Reply)

A sign between Great Chesterford and Hinxton
between Great Chesterford and Hinxton for a "Genome Campus" has been changed to "Gnome camp" more times than i can remember, first few times got a belly laugh.
(Halfy By light alone, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:56, Reply)

On a toilet wall in Banchory, Aberdeenshire, ca 1982
"What do James T Kirk and toilet paper have in common?

They both wipe out Klingons."

Sorry.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:56, Reply)

Chewy
On the side of a condom machine .....

"This chewing gum tastes horrible!"
(Tim K, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:56, Reply)

University Bogs
Aberystwyth University Library toilets were painted black in the cubicles to prevent graffiti.

The university authorities hadn't thought about the resourcefulness of the future empire builders of industry, and the availibility of tippex in the Student union shop.

Dicks
(Sir Tainley Barking Ezekiel 23:20, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:56, Reply)

Ireland
This is my favourite peice of grafitti ever. On a bus stop on the route from Dublin Airport to the city centre, it reads:

"DOWN WITH HOMEWORK"

I love the Beano-istic nature of it.
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:55, Reply)

Mum's are nice
Written on toilet wall 'My mother made me a homosexual!'

Added underneath: 'If I gave her the wool, would she make me one too?'
(fatharry, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:54, Reply)

smile, you thieving BLANK
really can't be bothered to trawl through 15 pages to see if it's been posted yet but one i see regularly on my way home from uni. as you leave wolverhampton on the train towards birminghan there is graffitied on a wall on some waste land in 3 foot lettering

"Smile your [sic] on cctv
you thieving ****"

the last word has actually been blanked out by someone, but i can imagine what it might have been.
(33% longer is struggling to think of a witty comment for here, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:50, Reply)

Dodgy Spelling
In my town's bus station:

"Tanya is a bicth"

Let me just say - my townsfolk are not well-known for their intellect (Walsall in the Black Country, by Birmingham). We are also famous for high rates of teenage pregnancy. And poor spelling obviously...

Oh, and if anyone else is from round here can you explain what the "Your Mum Rang" graffiti thing was all about? It was everywhere!
(petite chaussure, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:50, Reply)

And yet another...
"What word beginning with T describes the worst blowjob you've ever had? - Tremendous!"
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:49, Reply)

Narcissism
In my student years, I was told of some graffiti in the ladies loos of my local which said "PaulieG is a great shag". As I am not a seabird, or indeed a type of carpet, I can only presume that this was a celebration of my sexual prowess. Thanks Mum.
( paulieg La, la, la, not listening, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:49, Reply)

My Dads favourite
Warrington Royal British Legion

amended to

War ton Royal Brit s Leg

and the old bus favoirite

These seats are meant for elderly and disabled passengers

amended to

These seats ea t elderly and disabled passengers

God I was so funny when I was 12.
(Baggypants - The Trousered Avenger, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:49, Reply)

Above a urinal, starting with tall at about head height
junglist



tallest


taller

tall
(Rastus P Watermelon, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:48, Reply)

And another one...
...from the same desk in 1988, remembering we had a Tory government at the time.


"Vote Labour"

To which was then added by someone else -

"and ruin your country"

But the next addition made it:

"mansion".
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:46, Reply)

Northumberland
There's a little place off the A1 called Shilbottle. The locals add a bar to the l to make the signs read "Shitbottle". Which makes me laugh. Every time. Obviously the council don't like this, so paint over it, but the paint is non-reflective, unlike the road signs, which means its still blatantly obvious that it says "Shitbottle", especially at night. And its every single sign.
( paulieg La, la, la, not listening, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:46, Reply)

Seen on a lecture room desk
which was a tremendous source of humorous graffiti:

"Why is there only one Monopolies Commission?"



(Yes I know it became the Monopolies & Mergers Commission and then the Competition Commission, but this was 1988).
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:45, Reply)

On the condom machine in the students union:-
"For refund, please insert baby"
(Trousers_of_time, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:42, Reply)

Hungry and thirsty?
Think food and drink
(Jugular, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:42, Reply)

Obscure?
Brenda

written on my mates Yaris
(Jugular, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:42, Reply)

Best Graffiti ever? Does that include on b3ta?
In which case...

ROB IS GAY

teehee
(tarbin tarbis, tarbit, tarbamus, tarbimus, tarbant, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:38, Reply)

Toilet Wall
"Happiness is a dry fart"
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:37, Reply)

TOX03
Anyone who travels on the tube, especially in North London must have noticed these tags.
They're all about the place.
Here is an article about who he is.
His graffiti is actually pretty shit in terms of aesthetics, but you have to admire him for dedication and quantity.
(tarbin tarbis, tarbit, tarbamus, tarbimus, tarbant, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:35, Reply)

One more....
While taking a shit of seven apocalypses on the train home one day, I noticed the one of the warning-signs in said bathroom had been modified. It said:

"Do not flush the toilet while in a station", to which was appended "...except in Aldershot"

hear hear!
( slippery doctore, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:32, Reply)

last one... i promise
when i was about 14 or so, my school was putting on a play (some godawful tat to allow academically-inept kids to take pride in themselves or somesuch) anyway, the art teacher painted a series of enormous backscenes for said play. one day, someone sneaked into the hall and painted "BUM" in 8ft high letters across one of these scenes.

when we were called into assembly to find out who'd done it, guess who laughed out loud at the description, and was dragged before the head to spend an hour explaining that i hadnt done it, but it was as funny as hell.
(court escaper, Fri 4 May 2007, 10:31, Reply)