Women's clothes sizes
I don't understand how a pair of women's trousers can be "a size 12", for example. Why don't they show the waist/length in cm/inches, like men's do?

I don't get how some people in my office can get away with talking incessantly about the banalities of their diet/holiday/Doctor Who/house prices, while not doing any work ever, and still be respected by the boss. Grrr.

Also, I don't get why mainstream/popular gay culture is so often awful (Shirley Bassey, Weather Girls, Judy Garland, Village People etc), when so many of the greatest/most influential cultural figures in history have been homosexual (Leonardo, Hockney, Warhol, Wilde, Beethoven, Novello, Woolf, Rufus Wainwright and so on). Why aren't the talented ones celebrated instead of the shit ones?

Jeff Buckley's Grace. I've tried, really I have.

Fashion tribalism. I'm all in favour of people dressing to look nice, but why align yourself with a group of people and dress just like them? Why not have a bit of individuality? Why should the music you like decree how you dress any more than, say, the newspaper you read?

Lastly, Zoe Williams. Why do people employ her?
(xyandz, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 13:18, Reply)

Things what I don't get
Football
Men's health magazines
Alcopops
Big Brother
'Chick lit'
Reality TV
Wellies
Fox news
Blokes trying to be David Beckham - JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE BLEACHED YOUR HAIR AND PUT IT INTO AN ELABORATE SAMURAI PONY-TAIL DOESN'T MEAN YOU'RE A MILLIONARE SEX-MACHINE FOOTBALLER - IT MEANS YOU'RE A COCK.
Nasty tattoos of things like marijuana leaves or tweety pie holding a machine gun
Geeks who work in IT support and are having their first ever taste of power so decide to make life SO F*CKING DIFFICULT FOR THE REST OF US
Girls
Boys
Animals
Vegatables
Minerals
(Tanzender Affe, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 13:12, Reply)

The letter Q
OK so how about "Queue" ? Has to have a Q or it would sound like Cue
(mr.e.salad, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 13:02, Reply)

Guide Dogs
You know the sign you frequently find on shop doors 'No Dogs except Guide Dogs'

Well who is it for? Cause the blind person cant read it and neither can their dog.

Why not have a sign stating 'No Dogs' and the blind can do as they please.
(bambo, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 12:56, Reply)

I admit it.
I have never understood what people like about THE FEAR
( 100% Cock Raw like carrots., Mon 4 Apr 2005, 12:56, Reply)

Shirkers
I don't get why my ex flatmate won't pay up what she owes on our old place so that I can get my deposit back.
Or why she's been "too stressed out" to do anything 'bout it.
Unless being stressed means sitting on your fat arse bleating on about how great you are at everything but actually doing fuck all.
No didn't think so.
(smack rabbit, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 12:53, Reply)

Good Charlotte!
Who are they? What do they want? Who do they appeal to?

Is it only me who thinks they are Sh1te?
(DirtyChurch, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 12:28, Reply)

also
dont understand lithuanian very well...come to think of it i can only really understand english.
(st3ve, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 12:25, Reply)

RE:RE:TV
Ofcourse the Pope is to blame for Millions of deaths and orphans in Africa due to AIDS. Despite the fact the vast majority of African countries and people are not Catholic. Also if these people are dying from Aids because of there refusal to wear condoms due to strict religious reasons. If they were such strict Catholics they would not practise sex outside of marriage and would only ever have one sexual partner (their spouse), greatly decreasing the spread of the AIDS virus.
(It's Grim Up North, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 12:20, Reply)

The letter "Q"

Any word spelled with a "Q" can just as easily be spelled without one. Like "Kween" or "Skware". What a useless letter.
(Lucia, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 12:18, Reply)

tights/pantyhose
is it ok when you (a guy) have no doubts whatsoever about your heterosexuality?
(st3ve, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 12:15, Reply)

justmike
Come on! It is very funny. He steps on a rake, then another, then another...if something is repeated enough times it become amusing.

I don't get Pokemon. The animation is shit and the story is a bag of wank. So why does it appeal to about a million kids?
(mrmistoffeles, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 12:06, Reply)

Cheap at half the price
That's becuase 'cheap at half the price' isn't the correct saying - it should be 'cheap at twice the price' meaning (obviously) that the item is so reasonably priced that if the cost were to double, it would still be a bargain. Sorry.
(rumandcoke, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 11:33, Reply)

Office Politics
I don't get how people can be so caught up in shitting on their office enemies and gaining face that they can do things that are quite blatantly bad for the company with no compunction.

Or say that they see how something would be really good for the company, "but it's not coming out of my budget".

/on verge of going off to start own company so I don't have to deal with any of this any more.
(sticks Errol flynn in female form, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 11:27, Reply)

RE: TV
I get it. Thanks to the pope, millions have died an agonising death from AIDS as he condemned the use of condoms, and subsequently several million orphans have resulted in developing countires. Good one.

He was lucky to get 30 seconds, I on the other hand would have given him fuck all.
(bunny_333, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 11:23, Reply)

TV
Why when the Queen Mum dies we get programmes interupted and cancelled to pay tribute to her for a few days, yet when the Pope dies, who has touched more lives than then QM ever could, he gets a 30second news flash at the end of Casualty.
(NotSaying lurking is fun, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 10:01, Reply)

Tap dancing
When I was six i heard the age old joke "I used to tap dance - until I fell in the sink". I am ashamed to say that it took me no less that 8 whole years to get this. One day I just remembered the joke and got to thinking how shit it was and then realised what I was missing. No longer do I sit puzzled as to why anyone would be dancing around their kitchen or bathroom.
( Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 9:57, Reply)

Sideshow Bob + Stepping On Lots of Rakes = Comedy
Could someone please explain to me why that scene is funny?
And where did the idea come from? is it a reference to a film that I'm just not getting?
( just mike, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 9:48, Reply)

Sex and IQ
Why aren't women attracted to high IQ's? It's an evolutionary advantage, just like physical strength, low brow and ability to be a footballing cnut (did I say that out loud?) What's the deal? I do hear a little voice saying 'alright braniac, if you're so smart, you figure it out...' sigh, I'm off to masturbate into my mensa magazine again...
(bloodyHassocks, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 9:36, Reply)

Oasis...
...they're shit.
(KidMoe, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 9:16, Reply)

star wars
episodes 1 .. n

and jazz
( deodar ant trois minutes douche compris, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 5:52, Reply)

In case I've missed the point entirely
I don't get why people can't just act how they want to act, and stop running along with the herd. I mean, sure, herd life can be great, but what's wrong with taking a few days to yourself?

I also don't understand why wikipedia.org maintains an entry for goatse, but whatever...

EDIT: And I don't get how anyone can think Jude Law is cute/attractive/whatever. PFFT
(Ecclesia, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 5:40, Reply)

How do you answer that?!?
This one has stumped me:
"How many boards
would the Mongols hoard,
if the Mongol hoards
got bored?"
Can anyone give me an answer or say it really fast?
(lothric, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 5:30, Reply)

When I was 7 or 8, I told my grandfather a dirty joke
I knew about the existance of sex and all, but was still young enough to think that an old guy wasn't going to think me crude for repeating the joke.

Then he offered to tell me a dirty joke in return.

"White horse jumped in a mud puddle."

Well, that shut me up, for sure. For years I pondered and failed to see what white horses and mud puddles had to do with sex, until one day when I was 13 or so, it dawned on me... "OHHH!"

I'm so innocent and sheltered and such.
(Ecclesia, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 5:27, Reply)

Oh so many things...
Life in Japan is very confusing.

- Toilets that spray your anus. Why oh why would anyone want that? I mean, if you like it up the rear entrance it's probably nice and soothing. But I think it's just plain wrong.

- Why bus drivers warn you before setting the bus in motion, or turning left or right. I mean, come on it's a bus. Do people here not know that buses move?

- The things that people eat. Raw fish, live shrimp? Gotten over it. Horse meat, whale? Yummy. But fried chicken cartilage? Natto? (for the uninformed, that's fermented soy beans that look like stringy vomit and smell, and taste, like shit) oh the nastiness.
(dogpile, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 4:36, Reply)

Hmm...
The Chinese language, for one. And considering I live in Taiwan, that makes for awkward conversations.
(Tetsuo, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 3:03, Reply)

What possessed them?
I don't get how any group (ethnic, religious, gender orientation etc) can have a history of persecution and then turn around as soon as they get into power and abuse the shit out of someone else. What the hell possessed them to act that way? Don't they remember being hunted down/blown to bits/put in camps/denied rights? Jebus. The nerve of some people...
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 2:22, Reply)

I just don't get
gonorrhea.
Always* use a condom, kids.

*that is, only when having sex, unless you've got a latex fetish or want to have babies.
( Malchick, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 1:53, Reply)

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(Corn Dog, Mon 4 Apr 2005, 1:41, Reply)