Back to work, back to reality
I have to go down four floors to the landlady's house to let the cats out, but it's still dark and I've got the jitters for some reason.

Anyone else back at work today?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:04, 119 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm back to work too, totally looking forward to it.
I'm all like "OH BOY, BACK TO WORK" mode at the moment.

Got some well gnarly anxiety stuff going on though, donno why, just do, it's not in my head but in my chest. Oh well, it'll pass eventually.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:23, Reply)

I feel a bit crap at going back - even had a dream about it
but hey, there are people with no job and no home so I shouldn't grumble.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:42, Reply)

I'm already at work, took a sneaky day off yesterday to sit around in my pants doing nothing all day.
It'll still be quiet until the kids go back to school tomorrow. Today I'll be trying not to bite people.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:25, Reply)

I'm trying to be zen-like as well

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:42, Reply)

Is it working?
I'm getting into "looking for work" mode. I'm pretty desperate, odd that I really can't be arsed.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:43, Reply)

I need to stay in this post for at least six months I think,
and I only started mid-September.
Tigger just bit me. He's been an angel all holiday. CURSES!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:45, Reply)

I know how he feels, I'm feeling a bit bitey.
Hopefully today will be easy.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:49, Reply)

Well, Nana gave me a little statue of St Jude,
but he looks sad. I hope he cheers up.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:54, Reply)

ZOMBIE!

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:02, Reply)

Me, sadly :-(
To add to my bad mood, the first thing I heard this morning was a traffic report about the snow in the North West. Fucks sake, I'm sick of this fucking weather.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:33, Reply)

It hasn't snowed yet though
They could be scaremongering.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:42, Reply)

I checked the window, its here :-(

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:44, Reply)

My aunty in Chorley just said she's got snow :(
I'd better get the spikes out of the cupboard.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:46, Reply)

I live at the start of the road to Buxton, so anytime it snows, we get it
Luckily, its not a huge amount, but enough for cold feet!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:49, Reply)

I know that road.
My friend took me on a tour of that region on the way to Buxton once.
We went through Hyde too. Their Morrisons had a WELL old sign. The font was fucking ancient. No wonder he did what he did...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 7:51, Reply)

Round Macc?
It's not a bad place, bit dull though.

The only things we have are pubs, an ex-b3tan, a b3tan's sister, and me. Scratch that, it's really fucking dull round here. If you'll excuse me, I'm off to Ormskirk.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:10, Reply)

I am.
I've just changed the VAT rate on my site, you'll be thrilled to know.

I seldom watch television, but watched that Zen t'other night. I thought it wasn't bad, primarily for the Italian scenery, it really made me want to return to Rome as a matter of urgency. The fact that it was genuinely shot in Rome but all the actors were (or were speaking) English confused the fuck out of me initially. 'What are all these English police doing in Rome?', thought your simple-minded correspondent.

I mean, do wot, turn it up.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:20, Reply)

Alright Monty.
Good winterval?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:27, Reply)

No too bad thanks.
How was yours in your new environment?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:30, Reply)

Lovely, a bit lonely but I had a nice time nonetheless.
I got a cracking little synth called a Kaossilator, great piece of kit which has helped fire my inspiration for writing more music.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:33, Reply)

Watch out Oasis, eh?
Sorry, just slipping back into cheeky mode.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:35, Reply)

You say that as though you're never cheeky in the first place.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:35, Reply)

I don't know what you mean.
Me? Cheeky? Perish the thought.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:41, Reply)

I know, right?
In other news, I have a purring indian deity on my arm.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:42, Reply)

I hope it's not Ganesh for your sake.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:50, Reply)

ahaha yeah, it's Ganesh.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:52, Reply)

More like watch out my downstairs neighbours.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:36, Reply)

are you talking about your synth or something else here?

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:42, Reply)

I have no idea what you mean.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:45, Reply)

Do you feel the same about Wallander?
Morning all, Hope you had a good break. I'm looking forward to a meh year.

After I've watched the eclipse.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:29, Reply)

I've never seen it, so no.
How do?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:30, Reply)

It is good, and catches Sweden very well.
I'm fine, just in need of sleep.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:35, Reply)

I fucking LOVE Wallander.
it's a great show.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:36, Reply)

Is that the Kenneth Branagh one?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:40, Reply)

yup! I loved it.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:42, Reply)

The swedish one is good too.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:43, Reply)

haven't seen that one.
Australia didn't get it. :(
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:49, Reply)

Is this about cricket?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:52, Reply)

no?
it's about the size of your music collection.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:52, Reply)

Don't worry dude, I got the joke.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:18, Reply)

You alright?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:31, Reply)

Yeah,
I fucking hate January
(PsychoChomp, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:34, Reply)

miseryguts.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:35, Reply)

I'll be happy in late March.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:38, Reply)

why? is it your birthday then?

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:40, Reply)

Nah that's in May
but the weather (sometimes) gets better days get longer and stuff.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:43, Reply)

ahhh.
My birthday is 6 days after I get home.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:44, Reply)

Stop trying to get me to buy you a present.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:48, Reply)

but presents are fun. :(

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:52, Reply)

I missed that, a quick google tells me that it's got an actor I quite like in it
Might download at the end of the series.

I've stopped watching TV currently, I download most series I watch anyway, and have iPlayer/ITV Player/4OD if I want to see anything else. I watched Primeval the other night, I'm quite happy that's back.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 8:39, Reply)

Well, I've been playing Assassin's Creed Brotherhood
Which is set in Rome in the 1500s. It has also made me want to return to Rome, only this time I'll try not to jump off the Pantheon and stab a guy in the neck.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:07, Reply)

I'm back at work
I had a thoroughly shit night, started getting texts at 1 am, ended up in tears by 2am and didn't manage to get back to sleep until some time after 4 and up at 7 for a blood test...
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:01, Reply)

That doesn't sound like the best of nights Max.
Was it the mental ex on the blower?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:04, Reply)

Yup, then a friend for a couple of hours trying to reassure me I'm not a complete nasty arsehole

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:07, Reply)

You need to jettison her from your life.
If you keep getting these episodes when you're trying to move on, then clearly she expects to have (or want) some sort of hold over you.

Tell her to fuck off.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Alternatively, shag her, and when she's lying there in post coital bliss, change your number in her phone, cuddle her til she falls asleep, and curl one out on her chest.
That should work.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:15, Reply)

She doesn't want me for that
She has her off and on manipulative, alcoholic ex
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Hmm, did Monty introduce you to her?
If so, I may have some bad news...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:18, Reply)

Haha I'm not that cruel.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:21, Reply)

I did, I told her she can't keep doing this
and that she may want to keep someone who manipulates her close but I made my choice and I won't end up like her. That's when she turned nasty, started blaming me for her being unable to sleep, being so lonely, etc.

It didn't help that yesterday evening I found a note she wrote me a few months ago and hid.
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Block her number.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:18, Reply)

Not an option due to financial ties

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:30, Reply)

Otherwise, just per her on ignore.
Put your phone on silent when you go to bed and delete without reading any text messages she sends you.

But don't reply, whatever you do, don't reply.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:19, Reply)

I'd been doing so well with not replying
But the conversation started off quite nice
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:31, Reply)

When she says stuff like that, reply something like "lol, gutted", "haha, ace", "Aww Diddums".

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:36, Reply)

How about "Aww tear"?

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:47, Reply)

Now you're getting it!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:48, Reply)

The problem is that I'm really not that cruel
And she fucking well knows it, despite what she tells everyone about me :(
( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:53, Reply)

ooh yes
Back to wwork today. 6am walk with dogs in the snow... 7.30 drive down wharfe valley to work 8.30 at work with coffee made ( no, not the coffee maid)
(CheatingRabbit, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:02, Reply)

back to the grind.
I need a new job.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:05, Reply)

Being a stripper is not for everyone.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:16, Reply)

I'm back in work too
I've done a cursory glance over my work, checked emails, then come on here. I am struggling to remember where I left off, though seem to remember all three cases being tedious.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:08, Reply)

In order to depress myself less, I logged onto my work emails at home last night to mark all the automated ones as read
Cut the amount of unread emails from 25 down to 2.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Whilst I could remote into my work email
Or even get them copied to my phone, I like to keep work and my life as separate as possible ;)
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:19, Reply)

In order to depress myself less, I have you on 'ignore'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:23, Reply)

So how did you respond to that then?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:32, Reply)

It was a joke.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:46, Reply)

To depress myself less I'm determined to go to Tayyabs next week.

(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:36, Reply)

I am thinking of Sat 29th for a mass 'yabs.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:43, Reply)

Poor choice for a date
Pick another please.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:44, Reply)

You're right, that is a shit choice of date

(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:45, Reply)

You would be a poor choice for a date.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:46, Reply)

For you, yes
I'm a biter.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:49, Reply)

...of the 'pillow' variety.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:50, Reply)

For you
No.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:51, Reply)

Considering rswipe keeps speaking about a London bash around June, and I might make an appearance at it
Any chance of a Tayyabs trip then? You get to 'embarrass' me with how much of a wuss I am, or whatever it was you said.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:47, Reply)

Damn right.
I want to see you cry, you Korma Chamaeleon.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:49, Reply)

you cunt, that song will be in my head alllllllllll day now.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:50, Reply)

Hey, I fucking love Korma
I also enjoy Madras, so I'm not a complete wuss.

As long as it's tasty, it's all good!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:58, Reply)

Then Tayyabs is for you.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:13, Reply)

This^
Its fucking lovely!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:45, Reply)

My brother in law bought me this for christmas
www.darnspice.com/DSC_Store/chilli-sauces-and-powders/satan-39-s-shit-chilli-paste/prod_76.html

It's as hot as it sounds, I tried the tiniest bit on my little finger and my mouth was on fire for about ten minutes.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:58, Reply)

1.25 million Scovilles, I can fucking believe it.
Hottest I've ever had was 234,000, and that was just fucking horrific.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:02, Reply)

That looks gangsta.
I have 'Spontaneous Combustion' sauce at home, and took a sip for a drunken dare. I wept real tears.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:12, Reply)

400-500k, I'm not shocked at all.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:20, Reply)

Morning Monty
as i've just said to a delivery man, "Merry...um...Happy...?"

and a "merry um happy" to you. Did Len like her fort?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:39, Reply)

repost from last night:


EDIT Heap Um Merry to you too, Little Plum.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:44, Reply)

Awesome!
that's made my day.

Hooray for living vicariously through my internet friends.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:48, Reply)

Is she trying to kick it apart?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:48, Reply)

Yes.
I told her to pretend it was her mum's face.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:51, Reply)

Corners on exterior towers?!
Didn't the designer read anything about proper defensive castle construction?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:51, Reply)

I'm not sure pink is an accurate tile colour either.
It also seems a little small.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:55, Reply)

Which reminds me of
This scene from Zoolander. You probably won't like it as it was made after 1980 and is popular.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:59, Reply)

I have a copy of that at home that someone left at my house
Never watched it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:01, Reply)

Don't waste your fucking time
Ben Stiller is the main character in it, ergo it is shit.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:02, Reply)

I thought as much.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:10, Reply)

I hate Ben Stiller as a rule
But I really love Zoolander.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:13, Reply)

I can't stand Zoolander, Something About Mary, Meet The Parents, etc
However, I really liked Night At The Museum, and he's good in Dodgeball too. I think it's when the entire focus of the film is on how much he can make people cringe, it's shit. That also goes for Ricky Gervais.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:21, Reply)

Dodgeball's great too
But Meet the Parents was shit. I also hate Ricky Gervais quite a lot.
I think Zoolander worked for me because of the Stiller/Wilson banter, plus the scene with David Duchovny had me in stitches.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:26, Reply)

He hasn't even clicked the link
but he already hates it so much he set up a facebook group to get it banned for shitness.

Then he killed himself for setting up a facebook group.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:03, Reply)

cases boards
(PsychoChomp, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:19, Reply)

Never a truer strikethrough has been made

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:20, Reply)

Not today, but I didn't get a break
I have to get a new job though, which is something that has been depressing/terrifying me. So I'm hiding under my duvet trying to forget about it.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:47, Reply)

Lazy sod.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:48, Reply)

Shut up
I'm only hiding from the real world, not being lazy.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:50, Reply)

Did you see the breaking news thing I put on that link last night?
Hi-fucking-larious
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Aye, it's a bit of a pathetic defence
Bit like the Chris Langham defence.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:03, Reply)

When I get out of bed
I'll post a link to the whole statement. You couldn't make this shit up, honestly you couldn't. It's given me something to laugh about though. Set of cunts.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:06, Reply)

Write your CV!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 10:22, Reply)