Morning all!
How was your weekend?

Mine was pretty damn good, I got rather drunk on Friday, then had a friend stay at mine, where we walked to Tesco at about 3am to buy more booze.

On Saturday I helped a friend move into the house I'm in, then went to see a friend, who insisted I go for a drink with her. I then stayed out with her, and we had a good laugh. The night was made even better by a phone call off my brother telling me he'd just got engaged, and wanted me to be the first to know.

Yesterday I watched the football, then was having a few cans, chatting to a couple of my house/workmates who were cooking a roast, and they put a plate together for me, as they had shitloads spare.

All in all, pretty damn good weekend!

Alt Q: I missed breakfast this morning, bit disappointed about that. What is your standard breakfast on weekdays? And what would be your perfect breakfast?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 8:39, 193 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

My weekend was fine thanks
Went to see The Kings Spspspspspeech. Excellant film, if a little toadying to the royal family. Went to see my mum yesterday, and she regaled us with memories from the 1930's. I managed to avoid any ice based dancing programmes on the telly much to the annoyance of my girlfriend.

Alt Q Full english, with limitless toast.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 8:53, Reply)

I know it's meant to be superb, but that film just doesn't tempt me at all...

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:01, Reply)

You should go, Geoffery Rush is very good in it too.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:08, Reply)

Morning mate
I've had a crackin' long weekend, went to Stratford Wednesday with the missus and saw Matilda, which was bloody brilliant. Went for a Thai meal, hotel was really nice, had a fucking awesome Saturday in which Ms Foxtrot left me to my own devices to play Red Dead Redemption all day, which NEVER happens, plus Forest got a 94th-minute winner.

Yesterday bit, but 3 out of 4 ain't bad.

My standard breakfast at the minute is fruit and yoghurt, following 45 minutes on the treadmill watching BSG. This whole weight loss thing is invigorating/gay as fuck
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 8:54, Reply)

Glad you enjoyed Stratford
Which hotel and restaurant did you go to?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:16, Reply)

The Shakespeare hotel (part of the Mercure chain), very nice
and Thai Kingdom, also excellent. I had the hottest thing on the menu. It was awesome.

One question mate, I really like Stratford, it's very picturesque, but how long do you celebrate Christmas for there?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:29, Reply)

The Thai Kingdom is lovely indeed, good choice!
*sighs* Tell me about it, the decorations go up in early October, and they're still up now (as you know). There's also a Christmas shop that sells expensive baubles and Xmas tat all year round...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:46, Reply)

Yeah we passed that
My Mum would LOVE it amongst your people. I was really impressed with the whole trip to be honest, the musical was obviously the highlight but the town itself was lovely, and only a three-hour drive (not that far when you live in Norfolk). Would visit again, and hopefully we can have a beer next time.

Although for some reason once you get beyond Cambridge on the A14 the road is populated only by lorries, white van men and DICKHEADS
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:03, Reply)

Mine was excellent, thank you.
Quiet night in Friday, bed at 5am, slept during the day, saw my daughter Saturday night with an overnight stay at hers. Up at 8 yesterday, took her to the park on her bike, lots of climbing-frame/walking along logs/slide fun, dropped her back home at lunchtime.

Spent the afternoon in my favourite place, The British Museum where I caught up with my old chums the Battersea Shield, the Sutton Hoo burial and many more. Went to the pub, out for pizza, back to the pub and fast asleep by 10:45. Splendid stuff.

Ideal breakfast: A full Anglo-American featuring bacon (with maple syrup), scrambled eggs, gourmet sausages, black pudding, mushrooms, grilled tomatoes, granary toast, a bloody mary, a massive reefer and back to bed.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 8:55, Reply)

Alright Mont?
Sounds brilliant, glad you had a good time with your Daughter.

I went to the British Museum years back, fucking loved it.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 8:58, Reply)

Maaaarnin'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:22, Reply)

Maple syrup? on BACON?! I bet you like that horrible crispy stuff too
This is your Dad's fault, isn't it

Morning
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:04, Reply)

I like all styles of bacon if I am honest.
It is indeed my father's fault, the maple syrup thing. If I am completely honest I think there are a lot of things Americans get right about food, their top-end restaurants are superb - and in the South the barbecue culture is fucking magnificent.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:22, Reply)

I can't really comment on American food
having only every been to Florida, where I thoroughly enjoyed the ludicrously unhealthy food served to me at various Disneyfied outlets as a teenager. Haute cuisine was not high on my list of priorities. Glad to hear you had a good time with the nipper, sir.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:36, Reply)

In a lot of respects, it wasn't the best weekend I've ever had.
I cault up on all my work, which is a bonus, my plans were to come into work today and be all like "YEAH BITCH, LOOK AT THIS SHIZNISS, I AM VERY VERY GOOD AT WHAT I DO", and I did it all, but I woke up today and was like BLUUUURRGHHHHH and was really really sick and now my stomach hurts and I want to go into work but I don't want to go into work while in loads of pain and throwing up all the time.... in most respects, my body could be a hell of a lot worst, I understand that I don't have aids or cancer or blindness, and I try not to complain too much, but OH WOE IS ME.

On sunday I went to ASDA, this was a highlight of the weekend as I got to walk about listening to some music.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:01, Reply)

The ideal breakfast changes depending on what I'm doing for that day, but for most days I'd say Eggy Bread with golden syrup.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:02, Reply)

Apparently Andy Peters doesn't have a facebook fan page, I think I might make a facebook app called "Andy Peters" where you can put pictures of andy peters in your profile's pictures.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:09, Reply)

He spells it with an i - 'Andi', the repulsive gaylord.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:35, Reply)

ohhhhh

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:36, Reply)

Aww I didn't realise you were sick
If you go in I'll give you 10p for everyone you throw up on on the tube
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:09, Reply)

I'm deffo going in at some point today, even if it means I have to get a cab home.
I really don't want to be losing my job, on account of me loving it. I know I'm way ahead on my work and everything that needs doing is getting done, but I imagine they'll start getting well pissed off. I'm just waiting for my manager to come online and then I'll do what I can.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:15, Reply)

I hate to say this gonz but as it's been so bad
maybe you should make an effort to cut down on the smoking, my friend said that helped when his got really bad
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:17, Reply)

I really don't think you're wrong there, and I'm willing to try it.
Not to quit, but really cut down.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:20, Reply)

I'll cut out the "I'm bored" fags.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:20, Reply)

get some lollipops as an alternative
Or I can punch you every time you go to spark up within 10 mins of having a smoke
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:22, Reply)

I think I prefer the sucky sweet methord, but I think both would work.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:35, Reply)

Have you started your new drugs yet?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:18, Reply)

Yeh', last thursday, there is deffo an improvement, but there are side effects.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:21, Reply)

Thought so.
I hope it settles down soon.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:41, Reply)

cheers

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:49, Reply)

Standard breakfast is porridge.
Perfect breakfast would be porridge.
I like porridge.
( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:05, Reply)

Alright Goldilocks?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:09, Reply)

Hi !
Where have you been hiding?
( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Very busy at work, so I have had to cut down my skiving hours.
I've only been able to dip in for a couple of minutes here and there :(
How are you?
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:15, Reply)

Fair to middling.
Feeling positive and holding on to that feeling for dear life.
( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:16, Reply)

The blind optimism of youth.
They had a brief interview with Jeff Bridges on at the cinema t'other day. I wish I looked as good as he does. Rather Grizzly Adams he is at the moment.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:21, Reply)

I'm hardly a youth.
I do have a soft spot for the grizzly guys.
( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:25, Reply)

*Awaits RARRRRGH! type replies*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:26, Reply)

RARRRRGH!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:41, Reply)

*nods*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:15, Reply)

I mix porridge and muesli together so I get fruity, nutty porridge. NOM.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:11, Reply)

Mine was quiet,
Pub friday night, took Noel's daughter to Oxford to go shopping on saturday, and spent yesterday doing sweet fuck all while waiting nervously to see if I got any offers for uni. Opened up the website this morning and not only do I have the offer, it's for my first preference and at my preferred uni. woo.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:09, Reply)

Are you still here?
I thought you'd gone far far far away again? Are you going to uni here? It's not near London is it? *crosses fingers*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:11, Reply)

I don't go far far away again til the 31st :)
I'm going to Uni back in Aus.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:12, Reply)

congrats on getting in to the one you want
Rememeber, at uni you are supposed to work as well as drinking. I forgot about that aspect
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:15, Reply)

well I rarely drink so I'm sure I'll be fine.
the bash in london was a one off....
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Yesterday at Asda
two bottles of wine were falling from the shelf so I coaught them in my basket, then I forgot about them and when it got to the checkout I was too embarrassed to put them back so I had to buy them
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:19, Reply)

Well, I suppose it's a better excuse than
"They were half price, so I HAD to buy two."
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:21, Reply)

they may also have been half price
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:22, Reply)

She's going back to the land down under.
Where women roar and men thunder.
( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:13, Reply)

*gless*
I love that song
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:15, Reply)

Why? It's fucking abysmal.
And what the fuck does 'gless' mean, you CRETIN?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:43, Reply)

It means I like to annoy you in the morning
NOM NOM NOM
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:04, Reply)

Woop!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:20, Reply)

It's the sound of da police.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:43, Reply)

Woo congratulations!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:22, Reply)

Well done!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:32, Reply)

Congrats!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:45, Reply)

It's all about next weekend!
Seeing my friend who recently got engaged on Friday, then Tayyabs Saturday then some fun time with Team Awesome (oh and Lab) on Sunday.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:12, Reply)

Who's in team awesome and how does one become a member?

( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:18, Reply)

Oh you're in hun don't worry

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:45, Reply)

Woo!

( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:50, Reply)

*narrows eyes*

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:18, Reply)

Give over.
You know she thinks the sun shines out of your pert little botty.
( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:19, Reply)

Monday morning compliments FTW!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:25, Reply)

oh HAI shithead :D

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:20, Reply)

This made me glee for some reason!
Thank you for making me smile this early on a Monday!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:25, Reply)

No problemo
That will be £2.53 please
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:31, Reply)

*paypals*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:34, Reply)

Now say 'velly solly' in a comedy Chinese voice.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:44, Reply)

Had a good one, thanks for asking
Good night in the pub on Friday, then had a relaxing Saturday watching films and playing games. Yesterday I went to my folks for lunch and got fed lovely beef stew with dumplings.

Alt: Fry up! Crispy bacon, sausages, black pudding, baked beans, hash brown, fried bread, granary toast.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:20, Reply)

I read that as Granny Toast

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:20, Reply)

I'm struggling to picture what that might look/taste like

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:22, Reply)

Toast with a slight blue colour

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:23, Reply)

That is called mould

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:24, Reply)

Hairy toast that reeks of piss and gives you a pound and some neat squash?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:55, Reply)

mindbleach please

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:15, Reply)

Good weekend, ta
Excellent takeaway pizzas on Friday. Daughter's 4th birthday party on Saturday involving bouncy castle which was great! Pub lunch on Sunday and curry for Sunday evening, served with lots of beer.

Perfect breakfast is probably Eggs Benedict. Poached eggs are amazing!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:22, Reply)

I kicked a pigeon under the wheels of a HGV
so yeah pretty good cheers.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:31, Reply)

Nice one. Did you get an erection?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:56, Reply)

Just a semi lob on.
Some HGVs are called semis, you could make a joke about that.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:07, Reply)

Will do, thanks!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:11, Reply)

Though filled with essay, it was ok, overall.
I'm not too achy after the gym, either.

Alt: Never eat breakfast nowadays, last time I tried I threw it back up again. I love pancakes with golden/maple syrup, and porridge with brown sugar, and white toast with real butter. Not all togeteher, of course -bloats-
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:31, Reply)

Porridge with Golden Syrup is simply the best
in a non Tina type fashion

EDIT:
Non of this McSalt malarky
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:32, Reply)

It kicks starts your metabolism fatty
maybe you should try a cereal bar or some dry toast
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:33, Reply)

I forgot mine today
So am eating a Go Ahead bar thing at work.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:34, Reply)

Yes, I keep hearing this.
But my gag reflex is usually in overdrive in the mornings.

I'll force something into my gaping maw at some point.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:35, Reply)

How about a smoothie or something?
An amount of yoru five a day!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:37, Reply)

Stupidly a smoothie
only counts as one.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:38, Reply)

I think innocent ones, as they leave all the pulp in and shit, count as 2
Fruit juice, no matter how much you drink, is only 1.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:39, Reply)

This could also work.
I have a couple of clementines but that might be too acidic.The breakfast choices of Lampers, this is just TOO enthralling.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:39, Reply)

I have some Tropicana orange and mango which is yummy in the mornings

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:43, Reply)

Will have a scout round morrisons for something suitable.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:46, Reply)

MUST......NOT......MAKE....SMUTTY......RESPONSE......

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:38, Reply)

Fnarr

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:38, Reply)

thingone's cock
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:40, Reply)

Oh totally.
You must be pretty happy. Well done!
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:40, Reply)

I am stoked (sorry for abysmal reply time, I was looking at uni stuff).
I'm looking forward to it hugely.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:42, Reply)

Todays statistically the most depressing day of the year,
logging on to find an AA thread at the top of the page proves it.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:42, Reply)

So you thought you'd bitch about it
Rather than thread-stomping some optimism and Positive Mental Attitude up in this beyatch?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:44, Reply)

I'm attempting to give up smoking today so pretty much everyone's going to be called a cunt
you multi-chinned-pseudo-punk-cunt
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:48, Reply)

Good luck with that
I mean that sincerely
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:50, Reply)

It should be fine, I've got a cold that means, I can't taste any fags
and when I smoke it makes me feel sick and choke so there's not many better times to give up.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:51, Reply)

Very true
Hope you can kick it for good.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:54, Reply)

Hopefully the example of your Tunisian brethren
will inspire you to give up.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:57, Reply)

WOooooOOOoo tunisia
when I texted you I was gate crashing MK theaters Pantomime after party.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:27, Reply)

Did you get great seats at the after party?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:27, Reply)

Yep, I saw the back of Dirk Bennidicts head
and a rather drunk Stacy from Gavin and stacy.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:31, Reply)

She's got cracking tits

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:32, Reply)

You should have spoken to her
Got her all mad about that fat cunt getting all the fame and fortune, so she'd bust onto the stage of the Brit Awards and stab him in the face.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:32, Reply)

And if she won't do it, I happily will.
Useless, unfunny fat cunt.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:35, Reply)

I did speak to her briefly,
as in a "hello", "nice to meet you", "hi hi" I didn't feel it was a great idea to start mouthing off about people she works with.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:37, Reply)

did you ask her how she felt
being involved with one the worst "comedies" ever made?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:42, Reply)

Yeah, then I decided to ask her if she realised the welsh were shit
and that women were on the whole not as good as men.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:45, Reply)

those things aren't true
whereas Gavin and Stacey is fucking crap.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:02, Reply)

Today's
Anyone rememebr Toady from Neighbours? And he cut off his hair and they had it nailed to the wall of the pub. That was gross
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:44, Reply)

oh man, you're so funny.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:48, Reply)

I am funny
I think it's because I smoke. Mmmmm smoking. In fact I am going out for my morning smoke shortly. I am looking forward to it greatly
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:51, Reply)

Maybe you should kill yourself?
A) It'd help to prove the 'point' that this is the most depressing day of the year
and B) I fancy a laugh.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:44, Reply)

Encouraging fellow forum users to kill themselves is not cool
You need to take a long look at yourself in that room of mirrors.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:52, Reply)

Such bullying,
someone should pay my mortgage now.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:55, Reply)

I know, you appear to be having a hard time of it
Now having opened your heart to the internet he's spitefully turned it back on you and wants you to kill yourself purely for his entertainment. I'd say you've got a good case for the mods to ban him, just sayin.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:58, Reply)

Breakfast can fuck off
My weekend was shit. I had KarmaAIDS and didn't leave the house at all. Got too angryfeminist last night. Have hangover. Shit shit shit.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:52, Reply)

And they say bad things only happen to good people

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:01, Reply)

I'd take offence
But I know I'm a complete wanker.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:05, Reply)

I had an awesome threesome with the fittest girls imaginable.
In a dream. In real life I got drunk and watched a play in a language I didn't understand.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 9:52, Reply)

Was it the Gonzism version of Puracals, Prince of Tire?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:03, Reply)

*gless*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:14, Reply)

hahaha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:16, Reply)

Monty, I pray that this is some sort of complicated, witty insult
By that I don't mean that you said "glees", but that you couldn't even type five letters in the right order.
Edit: Shitarse, just noticed TGB spelt it wrong up there, so it is a witty insult.... carry on.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:16, Reply)

He's quoting her from further up the page
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1044621
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:17, Reply)

Aye, just spotted that when I scrolled up to check.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:18, Reply)

ha now who is the retard
well, who else apart from the obvious answer of me
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:22, Reply)

It was called ...
'In Love with Ralph' I believe. Riveting stuff.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 12:31, Reply)

Splendid, thank you.
How the fuck were you planning to buy booze from Tesco at 3am then? I know they aren't models of humanity but they don't tend to rape the licencing laws.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:13, Reply)

It worked, we ended up picking up a few cans.
I'm not sure what the licensing laws are for 24 hour supermarkets...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:16, Reply)

It depends on the licence granted by the local council.
They're all different.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:18, Reply)

I'm pretty sure there isn't a 24 hour off-sales licence
anywhere in the UK, but I'm willing to be proved wrong.

Local licensing laws tend to apply to on-sales.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:34, Reply)

Oh, my bad
it turns out there are. When the fuck did that happen?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:35, Reply)

About four or five years ago.
They're very expensive though, which is why it's so rare to find them.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:39, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1044769
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:42, Reply)

Round our way, they stop selling booze at 11pm.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:19, Reply)

I know several of the ones around Skem are the same
But there's one that sell booze 24 hours about 10 minutes drive away.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:22, Reply)

Costcutter ftw
24 hour booze supply right across the road
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:23, Reply)

Sweet, ours is about 10 minutes walk
And there's a takeaway en route.

Although I'm fucking pissed off about takeaways today. I paid £5 for a Chicken burger, chips, chicken wings and a drink, all was well until I bit into the burger, and they'd put FUCKING MAYO on it, without asking me. Bastards.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:27, Reply)

they assumed that as a fat bastard
you would want mayo
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:33, Reply)

Wasn't as big as I'd have liked it to be
The chips came in the same size bag as a small fries from McDonalds, and the chicken bits were tiny.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:34, Reply)

London is superb for the round-the-clock alkie.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:35, Reply)

It's disappointing, Monty
in my day in London you had to find the dodgy greek-cypriot supermarkets on green lanes that thought licensing laws applied to other people. It's just too easy for the drunken youth of today.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:41, Reply)

When I moved into my area
you had to go to the kebab shop in Shoreditch, buy some grotty food you didn't want (and threw immediately into the bin upon exit) and get your beer. The good old days.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:46, Reply)

OMG OMG OMG
i used to live on duckett road (one of the "ladders" that runs off green lanes). we spent our lives in those 24 hour drinking dens behind the kebab shops, some of them had pool tables and juke boxes etc. great times. total shithole though.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:51, Reply)

I lived on Warham Road, three up from that.
and Allison Road. Used to drink in the Old Suffolk Punch, but I think that's gone now.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:08, Reply)

so did i!
god it's a small small world, the london drinking world
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:09, Reply)

as I said when you were suggesting pubs in Clerkenwell
if there's a pub in London, I've probably been slumped on the bar there.

/when were you there?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:12, Reply)

1997-1998
it was one of our delightful student digs... you??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:28, Reply)

94-95
and then around 97-99 on and off, although I was living in Bounds Green mostly then.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:36, Reply)

Oh and "Aeon FC" was our 24h kebabbery back room card den of choice.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:10, Reply)

no 24 hour booze supply round here either
We used to dream of an all-night emergency booze delivery service with outrageous markups after midnight you could phone - perhaps as an adjunct to a taxi service. Now we're all old we bring enough booze in the first place, and when it's finished we go to bed.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:42, Reply)

We used to have one of those in Macc, it seems it's gone.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:53, Reply)

my weekend was awesome
but i may still be drunk today.

i hate breakfast, but as part of the new year health drive thing, i force myself to have a packet of those belvita breakfast biscuit things (200 cals) and a bottle of tropicana orange or grape juice (not from concentrate and NO PULPY BITS, i hate pulpy bits with a passion).

perfect breakfast would be in a massive white four poster bed in a luxury caribbean resort with the windows flung open to show off turquoise water, sun, white sand and palm trees, and some drop dead gorgeous bloke wearing only a white towel and a suntan. the food can fuck off.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:25, Reply)

Pulp is vile. And the band is shit.
So you enjoy a good bit of sausage in the morning?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:28, Reply)

Why was the weekend awesome?

( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:30, Reply)

just lots of nice things
fri night curry, sat shopping and hairdo (FAR. TOO. SHORT. i have been stropping around ever since, although when i changed my fb profile pic to show everyone the trauma, amberl immediately asked what it looked like, so clearly didn't realise how short it was in the new pic - maybe i am overreacting), sat night we were out til about 4am getting leathered in manchester, then nice family lunch over in yorkshire yesterday, plus some nice texts from the potential bloke, it was all excellent! how about you??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:34, Reply)

Quiet and boring.
My mum's gone away so it's all hands to the pumps looking after dad etc.

Edit - Just looked. It is noticebly shorter but looks fine.
( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:37, Reply)

had lunch with the family from tod on sun
usual "royle family" aga-saga type stuff.... my half-brother's half-brother has knocked up a third girl despite not seeing his first two kids... my cousin met her new man at tod market then it turned out he's married to her old mate from school..... made me feel quite homesick, all that gossip. the yorkshire rain can fuck off though, it chucked it down all day.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:40, Reply)

Haha!
I don't know anyone in Tod other than my sister.
( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:44, Reply)

I am planning on having a haircut
Saturday afternoon immediately prior to Montstock. If the benders cut more than two inches off I'm going to burn their 'salon' to the ground.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:43, Reply)

don't take a book
this is where i went wrong, and the scissor-happy "hair director" directed it all onto the ground whilst i was oblivious to the world :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:49, Reply)

I'll direct their teeth down their throats if they do that to me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:50, Reply)

Might I recommend you stay away from Delilah's Salon then?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:07, Reply)

Why?
why? WHY?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:13, Reply)

'Cos they fucked Sampson over?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:15, Reply)

Pulp in juice is wrong
I'm also forcing myself to eat breakfast, which tends to be some sort of low calorie breakfast bar thing.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:34, Reply)

Marmite on toast is what you want.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:34, Reply)

That involves buying bread and marmite
And then faffing for 5 minutes in the morning when I could be sleeping, wanking, or sleep-wanking.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:37, Reply)

a quiet one
managed to sleep for 10 hours on Friday/Saturday, so the moring was a write-off. Went to the football on the afternoon, which was one of the most entertaing games I've ever seen. Veg chilli for dinner and a Shooter's Sandwich prepared and left to press overnight. Ate offcuts of the ribeye steaks with some of the mushroom filling while watching Match of the Day, heavenly.

Sunday was gym and eating the shooter's sandwich - turned out lovely, if not as pretty as DiT's.

Alt: Weekday breakfast is tea, cereal and fruit juice swigged from the carton.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:29, Reply)

A nice weekend
good time for friends on Friday night. Long walk by the South Devon coast on Saturday. Out for a mate's birthday on Saturday night, which included 3 different cakes made by his lovely mrs.

Went to see my bro yesterday who is home from hospital with the pneumonia thing. He's ok which is good, just fucking knackered.

weekday breakfast = granary toast, one with marmite, one with nutella and a glass of OJ.
Ideal breakfast = eggs Benedict
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:36, Reply)

Glad your bro's ok

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:40, Reply)

me too
sounds like he had some liver infection as well. Unpleasant stuff. Still, gives him plenty of time off work to play Gran Turismo 5
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:41, Reply)

I don't envy the pain and discomfort
But sitting around playing games sounds good right about now.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:46, Reply)

Good news.
Now I can tell you about my mate who died from pneumonia about a year ago.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:44, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:45, Reply)

I'm glad it amuses you.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:47, Reply)

I appreciate you not telling me before

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:50, Reply)

I was privately crossing everything for you.
It's a great deal more serious than I thought; I had no idea people died from it until my pal did.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:52, Reply)

a surprising number do die
20% or something, I seem to recall him saying.

Fairly worrying, but with no history of anything of the sort he had a good chance of not dying.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:54, Reply)

My pal was an ex-Motorhead roadie in his 50s
with a history of prescription and non-prescription drug addiction, so was a high risk patient I should imagine.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:05, Reply)

sounds like it

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:07, Reply)

People's untimely deaths always do.

( girlinthehole, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:55, Reply)

Eggs Benedict FTW!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:48, Reply)

pretty quiet really
And mostly very lazy. Lots of sleeping, but may well have involved the pub or pubs several or more times. (No sleeping in the pub though, that'd be offside.)

Standard weekday breakfast is coffee. Favourite breakfast (probably at about 11:30 in the morning, after walking a bit or digging a hole) would be eggs Benedict with a fried potato/black pudding/spring onion salad, and a spicy Bloody Mary on the side (which absolutely must have a little lime juice and celery salt in it). Rats, now I'm feeling hungry ...
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:45, Reply)

that sounds like a superb breakfast combination
I'll have that too
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Jan 2011, 10:51, Reply)

Best breakfast is always the Breakfast of Champions.
(see Kurt Vonnegut)
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 17 Jan 2011, 11:25, Reply)