ME
I shouted at one of my colleagues this morning. He brought up something we disagreed about and settled yesterday, just to get at me, so I growled at him. Who was the last person you shouted at and why?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:29, 80 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Are you sure your colleague isn't a woman?
Sounds like something women do.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:30, Reply)

lolsexism
He's old and grumpy. My other colleagues looked at me like I'd shit on his dead mother.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Did you just growl, or actually shout?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:32, Reply)

I shouted, very unlike me
but he pushed my buttons. Told him he was pissing me off, I've already apologised, cleared it up and to drop it.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:34, Reply)

Good
Hopefully he won't bring it up again, that's a grade A dick move.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:36, Reply)

You're so bent
you grade penile motions.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:37, Reply)

You're just bitter you didn't pass the 'entrance exam'

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:41, Reply)

Ha ha - whereas that was really me!
Sorry you got the blame. I got caught short as I was passing the chapel of rest. How was I to know they were Padraigs and thus prone to the old 'open casket'? I just popped the lid off the coffin, curled out a 'caber' and went on my merry way.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:33, Reply)

I can't remember the last time I shouted at a person
unless it was someone driving like a tit on the motorway. I'm more inclined to shout at inanimate things such as my phone when it drops calls because the signal in my flat is so poor.
(berk, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:33, Reply)

This
I have to be pushed rather far before I'll shout at someone.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:35, Reply)

*pushes Lab*
*glees as he wibbles and wobbles*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:44, Reply)

*GLESS*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:46, Reply)

Not dead from an OD yet then?
Oh well there's always a heavy weekend to hope for *crosses fingers*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:46, Reply)

I'm too tough to die. Sorry.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:50, Reply)

whatevs Monts
I'll be dancing on your grave before you know it
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:52, Reply)

Y'know, when he does cark it
We should hold a bash on his grave. See if we can anger him with our musical choices that he rises from the grave as a zombie.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:58, Reply)

Ashes to Ashes

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:12, Reply)

Cheeky cunt

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:47, Reply)

wuv u squishybear

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:49, Reply)

I shout at the traffic most days, dressed in pyjamas and carrying a bottle of Claymore.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:34, Reply)

Just last Tuesday
I yelled at some vile little bitch who holding up the night bus by racially abusing the bus driver. I don't often raise my voice, but I was really in no mood to have to walk the last five minutes back to my flat.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:37, Reply)

I'll bet she was foreign. They're all like that, you know. Fucking racists.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:38, Reply)

She had it in for this poor chap
because he was an African immigrant. This, despite the fact that, being of mixed race herself, there was a high probability that one of her parents - or perhaps one set of grandparents - would have been African immigrants themselves...
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:41, Reply)

Sounds like my Sri Lankan employee
who's always going on about 'Pakis'. I haven't the heart to tell him that to the vast majority of white Britons he might as well be from Pakistan himself.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:43, Reply)

Imagine how appalled you'd be if you visited the subcontinent
and were informed that to the locals, you could be Scotch. Or from Birmingham.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:47, Reply)

I am a Scot.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:52, Reply)

You probably won't mind too much then
I'd be horrified, myself
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

I'm not very shouty
I can't remember the last time I've shouted at anyone, and never at work.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:38, Reply)

I never shout at anyone or anything
I am the epitome of tranquility
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:38, Reply)

On the outside maybe.
On the inside you're like a group of one-legged ducks in the water, thrashing about and bumping into each other.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:39, Reply)

Nope
I installed a zen garden in the cavern
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:42, Reply)

Ms Foxtrot
Just because she's much better at Ballroom than I am and knows the technique backwards, she assumes she's always right

Fictitious, more interesting answer: some vile povvo with the temerity to stray close to the edge of my peripheral vision whilst I was taking my alligator for a lunchtime stroll
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:38, Reply)

I've never shouted at anyone before, I find talking quietly (but not meekly) is more effective 'cus they have to concentrate to listen.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:40, Reply)

I'm basicly a big ball of passive aggressive anxiety that is caged in by loldrugz. A bit like a rip tide.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:41, Reply)

*slowly backs away*

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:42, Reply)

argh the fridge thing
the reason it failed is that i have been out so late the past few nights and haven't actually been in the kitchen! just bed, shower, bedroom, out.

weekend will fix it, SORRY...

/grovels
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:52, Reply)

No rush dude, I'm just yanking your crank.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:54, Reply)

Are you living with Rachel now?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:56, Reply)

Nah man, I'm terribly high-maintenance and she couldn't put up with me.
OR IS IT??!11?1ELEVEN!!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:58, Reply)

i'm not very good at living with anyone
i love having my own space. new flatmate is great but she's away for 4 days and i am very excited about this. when she goes, she will be the last flatmate.

although i always say this.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

in a good way
wednesday night, we were very happy and loud and drunk and shouty. i expect much more of the same tonight.

in a bad way, definitely at the traffic. i hate it, i hate sitting still, i utterly despise it. however, i TRY not to lose it enough to howl "fucking fucking twats fucking fuck off out of my fucking way you are fucking well ruining my fucking evening because i can't fucking well get there" very often because people in surrounding cars can see you. and it's not a good look.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:40, Reply)

Oh, if we're talking shouting inside heads, so not verbally, then most days on the tube as someone in a suite barges pass me to go to their very very important buisness meeting where if they catch the next train, someone will DIE...
... the time it took to make their tripple shot granda maikoito doesn't count.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:43, Reply)

it's not always inside my head sadly
then i have to pretend to be yelling at the phone. most embarrassing.

better than singing along when i have the roof down on the car though. i once got caught singing along to "the time of my life" by an entire bus-stop, it was MORTIFYING. esp as my car reg has my name on it, so they were calling out my name.... urgh!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:46, Reply)

Personalised number plate?
Classy!
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:50, Reply)

it was my 21st birthday present
and i love it. it is ironic kitsch and it means i never lose my car in a carpark.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:51, Reply)

ironic kitsch something people have to continuouly justify because it's really just a massive pile of egotistical wank
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:53, Reply)

maybe
but it's worth a reasonable amount of cash and it goes up in value every year as it gets older and i quite like having that little bit of extra security, it means i get to spend more money on vodka.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:06, Reply)

More "a massive investment of egotistical wank" then?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:07, Reply)

Best kind of investment given the interest rates.

(berk, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

Hey, I know you girls stick together but I never pick on swipe and now you've ruined it :(

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:08, Reply)

awesome
*checks off list*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:10, Reply)

probably
but really i like it because it was my 21st birthday present, so it also reminds me of my mummy - she had a cake made for me in the shape of the car with the licence plate on it, it was great!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:09, Reply)

Tell me it didn't have dried fruit in it?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:10, Reply)

no
i hate fruitcake, you know that.

my brother/fiancee are having a three tiered cake for their wedding. one of the layers will actually be lemon drizzle cake. they better not leave me alone in a room with it, that's all i can say.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:14, Reply)

The kid and I made fucking awesome drizzle cake last year.
Might do that again Sunday, nom.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:15, Reply)

lemon drizzle is my absolute favourite
other than that, i only like shop-bought sponge cake with roll-on icing, like a waitrose birthday cake. i am such a fussy twat.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:16, Reply)

I make excellent lemon drizzle cake
it has booze in and everything.
(berk, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:18, Reply)

R5W1P3?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:51, Reply)

CLA55Y
actually
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:52, Reply)

P1K3Y

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:53, Reply)

SL4G

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:01, Reply)

BR345T5

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:01, Reply)

Hah, my Ma' and Dad both had the same style of personailised lissance plates.
Dad forgot Ma's birthday and it was around the time she needed a new car as the old one was falling appart, plus Ma' was always loosing her car in the carparks, so he got "[first initial] [DOB: day] [DOB: short month]". Then he did the same format for when he got his next car whenever that was.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:00, Reply)

they make me laugh
my old job was as a letting agent, and they had the lot:

1 LET, 2 LET, 4 LET, B16 LET, A11 LET, W6 LET, M20 LET...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:07, Reply)

I saw a Box It van with the reg
T1 Xo8 which I thought was a little bit clever
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:17, Reply)

My massive bore of a flatmate who moaned at me for not helping clear up the front room.
Despite the fact absolutely none of it was me and I never go in there. I ended up going "you're from Huddersfield - nothing you say will ever bother me". Quite good I thought.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:49, Reply)

Did you then steal his wallet?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:51, Reply)

And his coat

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:55, Reply)

Racist
but with good cause
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:51, Reply)

Is he the bender?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:54, Reply)

No he's Northern Irish.
I'm surrounded by people from pointless places.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:57, Reply)

My daughter
Because she kicked my in the nose on purpose when I tried to put her pyjamas on last night.
( Peej, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:51, Reply)

The chap who called me from a Mumbai call centre about twenty minutes ago
Claiming he was the man to fix my PC (not that it's broken) and all I'd have to do with visit www.gotomypc.com and he could run his special file to fix the problem.

He claimed to be called Martin, I told him to call me Sanjay.

Martin didn't speak very good English but he does know a few new words now. The wannabe theiving cunt.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 11:51, Reply)

I had one of these twats on the phone the other week
"Yes sir, I am Bob from the Windows maintenance team"

"Oh so you work for Microsoft then?"

"Kind of sir, I am Bob from the Windows maintenance team"

"No you're fucking not. Now fuck off."

*slam*
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:05, Reply)

He was your window cleaner you fucking cunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:07, Reply)

I don't think my window cleaner has the mental wherewithall to utilise a telephone
He has barely mastered a bucket and chamois leather.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 11 Feb 2011, 13:08, Reply)

Shouted at angrily, it was a 'woman' who works here
Has no concept of personal space, nor hygiene. She also speaks far too loudly, for no good reason.

It was before Christmas, as I've been pretty chilled out this year. She was just being a pain, and complaining about something that didn't affect her, and was actually none of her business, as I was sorting it. Eventually, I just told her to get away from my desk, as she was helping no-one, and giving me a headache. Highly entertaining.

Shouted at normally was my friend the other night, as we were at a gig, and a fucking cracking one at that.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:01, Reply)

Marseille?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:05, Reply)

Nope, Evile
Neil says Hi btw.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:07, Reply)

I drunkenly shouted at people last night
but they were shouting as well so it was fine. Not in anger, just to be heard
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 11 Feb 2011, 12:10, Reply)