I'm a horrible, selfish person.
My friends have some surprise planned for me on Thursday, which I'm dreading. I hate surprises.
And after seeing something on FB, I've come to the conclusion that we will likely be going to a concert.
I hate going to concerts.

Why are you a horrible person?

alt: favorite pick me up drink? I love mocha frapps from starbucks, they're like crack
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:13, 167 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Why do you hate going to concerts?
Alt: Cider.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:15, Reply)

because they're full of drunken wankers
the drinks are $11 each
it takes 5 hours to get out of the parking lot practically
but mostly because they're full of drunken wankers
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:21, Reply)

Take drugs.
It'll be cheaper than getting drunk.

What band are you likely to be going to see?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:22, Reply)

I don't do drugs.

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:29, Reply)

I've not heard of them, what sort of music do they play?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:32, Reply)

It's Jason Aldean I think, country concert, full of drunken wankers
must be about my wits lest I'm raped by Bubba

the idea of going is really really doing my head in, Jeff
even if I'm wrong, I cannot imagine what they have planned and it's making me want to kill myself by wednesday
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:48, Reply)

Get an excuse in early.
Suggest as well that 'Country music is full of fucking cunts, and exposure to it turns you into a massive bender'

That might make them change their minds.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:57, Reply)

but I like country music

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:59, Reply)

I'm a massive shut in and I should be locked in my mums basement where I'll be happy forever

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:00, Reply)

I just assumed that with your love of N-Dubz you'd consider country music rubbish.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:00, Reply)

nah, I listen to it everyday
I've also listened to N-Dubz everyday since Christmas
gosh I love N-Dubz
and country
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:10, Reply)

Any developments with the house move?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:14, Reply)

Nope
my dad is trying to convince me to stay until she tells me I have to leave
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:24, Reply)

That seems foolish.
As the moment it comes on top, you'll have to rush into moving, if you plan it in advance, you'll have more choice and more time to make the right decision and not a quick decision.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:33, Reply)

that's what I told him
NOW, back to the saga of Thursday
should I post something on FB that's all "hmm...so glad I'm out of the phase to go to concerts, I know other people enjoy them but I just can't get into it, rather be reading a book"
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:36, Reply)

Thing is though, if your friends are taking you as a surprise then they might get annoyed and think...
'She much have known, we won't do anything nice for K ever again!'

Maybe you could post something along the lines of 'I've got a really early start on Friday, it'll be an early night on Thursday'

At least then, you aren't mugging them off if they have planned taking you out, you've got your excuse lined up and if your friend have planned something fun, you can always change your (fake) plan so you can go.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:40, Reply)

what about OMFG I HATE JASON ALDEAN, GET OFF THE RADIO

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:52, Reply)

+ I've been told by the English, that country music is bent.
Therefore, I won't listen to it again as clearly the English are far brighter than us.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:00, Reply)

I'm totally doing this

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:03, Reply)

You'll in no way fall out with anyone by doing this.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:05, Reply)

I'll probably get replies like "omg teh english r dumb"

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:07, Reply)

hahaha
Then you should definitely post it!

Add to the post that, 'I want to go to England one day, but you won't get a visa if you've infected your brain with country music'
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:10, Reply)

"my dad says country music makes you stupid"

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:16, Reply)

I'm selfish and jealous and terrible at helping people who are having a bad time
alt: tea, or latte
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:17, Reply)

that doesn't make you horrible
I'm concerned that my friends will try the old ritual humiliation thing on me on my stag do. This would be evidence that either they don't know me all that well, or they place "tradition" higher in their list of values.

alt: I really like milk, and am fond of milkshakes as well. Can't beat a cold can of coke though.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:18, Reply)

Where are you going on your stag weekend?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:21, Reply)

I suspect we shall go to cornwall
either camping or staying in cottage type things

and there will be surfing and drinking etc.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:26, Reply)

And stripping you naked
and cutting your stupid hair
(Bazongaloid, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:32, Reply)

Anyone who did shit like that to me would find their wedding invitation cancelled

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:34, Reply)

^this
most of them will be cool, but there are a couple who I suspect may try something silly. They will be reprimanded.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:36, Reply)

I almost never send birthday cards
and I never remember my parent's anniversary.

alt: coffee, stewed black tea, or lemon and ginger tea with honey in it.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:20, Reply)

Stewed tea?
Bleeeurgh.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:21, Reply)

I make a cup and leave it to brew
then I forget about it and only rediscover it about an hour later. Then I microwave the bugger for a minute and add a little milk. I am turning into my father, he would do this twice with the same cup of tea.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:25, Reply)

You sick sick man*
*possibly a woman, but I think a man.

Either way that's just fucking wrong.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:29, Reply)

try it
it's quite nice, I've started to do it on purpose. It makes shit of your crockery though.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:33, Reply)

I don't know when my parents' anniversary is...is that bad?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:24, Reply)

until a few years ago it didn't bother me
but then we missed a really major one, the 30th I think, and I still feel guilty about it
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:26, Reply)

I did the business for my folks' 30th

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:32, Reply)

you see
that's because you are a much better person than me.

What did you do?
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:34, Reply)

Well I got them this pair of rose bushes called 'Pearl Anniversary'
but that was sod all, I wrote them this letter and read it out, about how they were practically kids when they got married but they've done a good job, and how everyone loves being in their home because they're lovely and stuff. I told a little life story and everyone cried. My mum keeps the letter in the box with the pearls my dad got her.
I was the golden child for weeks after that.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:37, Reply)

Aww, that's lovely

(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:46, Reply)

lovely bent
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:51, Reply)

We're a totally bent family
We're like the Von Trapps with Tourette's.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:53, Reply)

haha!

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:03, Reply)

"So long, farewell, au revoir, auf wiedersehen!"
"I'd like to stay and taste my first champagne, yes?"

"No"

"Fuck the lorra yis!"
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:55, Reply)

God, you cynical shit
Roota did a lovely thing for her folks and it was much appreciated by them. It was not bent at all.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:18, Reply)

nicely done

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:51, Reply)

Awww! *sniffs*

( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:19, Reply)

I don't know when my parents' anniversary is either.
Not that they'd want me to I reckon - they're divorced.

We're one of them 'modern' families.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:40, Reply)

Does your old feller still make bolognese round yours?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:41, Reply)

He's round ours more than he is his own place.
I wish you didn't mention food as I'm bloody hank marvin and there's no food in.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:48, Reply)

I'm basically a shit person, I think
I should be less selfish and more generous and hard working. But I'm not.

Diet coke, mango rubicon, cider or wine depending on where I am.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:28, Reply)

If you were less shit
then boys would like you more.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:31, Reply)

A boy liked her last week alright and probably still does, isn't it?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:31, Reply)

I would imagine so, if he doesn't then serious words may have to be had.
I was only joking, I know boys like her anyway.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:33, Reply)

I thought she snogged a BWOY last week?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:39, Reply)

I'm pretty sure I would have remembered that...

(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:40, Reply)

Oh, I must have misunderstood some comments.
I thought Al suggested you had a snog in Oxford
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:42, Reply)

I think he may have been lying
he does that.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:43, Reply)

Al is a shit-stirring oik
no I did not.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:43, Reply)

He did?
who did?

PS - your dvd is going in the post tomorrow, sorry I've been so busy and disorganised I haven't had a chance to get to the post office.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:34, Reply)

See above

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:39, Reply)

Most probably
I'm pretty much resigned to a life of shitness and singledom though.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:32, Reply)

Don't worry missy,
I'm a right dozy mare and will not watch it until, bloody easter or something.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:40, Reply)

You'll always have cake though berk.
You'll always have cake.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:58, Reply)

Great
I'll be resigned to a lifetime of shitness, singledom and obesity in that case.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:00, Reply)

Nah you're old enough to know what you like my friend.
Alt: Rio, NOM NOM.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:29, Reply)

Rio is the good shit

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:30, Reply)

Rio is a hugely underated drink

(Bazongaloid, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:31, Reply)

Thoughts on yesterday?
I am pathetically gutted.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:32, Reply)

We have needed a new keeper for a long time
and that just sealed it. That stupid useless cunt should never play first team football again. And we desperately need a new central defender.

And a decent striker, one who will actually kick the ball at the goal rather than just pass it brilliantly across the goal mouth.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:34, Reply)

Lloris is available and Reina, the defence is our weakest aspect.
Arshavin, Bendtner and Rosicky need to be replaced too.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:37, Reply)

What is it?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:33, Reply)

Its a fizzy fruit based drink.
Much like all other fizzy fruit based drinks, but it's just very nice, especially when you're really hot and need a cold drink
(Bazongaloid, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:35, Reply)

it's less sweet and comes in tasty flavours

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:37, Reply)

I'm going to the shop
I need Rio. Not Ferdinand.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:38, Reply)

Rio Cock Ferdinand clunge.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:44, Reply)

you utter helmet.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:53, Reply)

sounds awesome
I'm on a new fruit punch kick, haven't had it since I was a kid
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:50, Reply)

punching and kicking
you're so violent
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:06, Reply)

I never ever see Rio
anywhere except dodgy takeaways/cafes. I make a point of buying it when I see it now because it's so bloody hard to find. It's like Lilt only better.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:33, Reply)

indeed
you tend to get it in independent café and sandwich shop type places who haven't had the lads from Coke or Schweppes or whoever round to break their legs.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:37, Reply)

I've not seen this for sale in can-form in ages
www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFTtDUSMJ8o&feature=related
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:50, Reply)

PRETTY sure they have it in Olveston Stores near me!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:51, Reply)

They have that everywhere
clearly you live too far south.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:52, Reply)

they have it in Devon
although why anyone would want it is a mystery to me
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:56, Reply)

yes, old enough to know what I like
but people seem to be blinded by what they like
and because they think it's a blast for them, they think I will have a blast as well and that is just not the case
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:50, Reply)

fuck em, do what you want.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:53, Reply)

Relentless!
A kick up the bum in a can.
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:55, Reply)

redbull destroys me quicker than the vodka
I once had it served with. That much caffeine ain't good for me
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:57, Reply)

me anyone
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:58, Reply)

Redbull is illegal in France, I believe
for that reason. Or to serve it with alcohol is illegal. Or something.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:01, Reply)

yeah, but add on the fact
a cup of tea turns me from miserable sack of lame into a ball of enthusiasm and coffee makes me bounce off walls, I think it's best I don't go near it
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:03, Reply)

I hate redbull.
Happy candleday btw.
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:58, Reply)

thank you - I remember when all this was a thread

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:00, Reply)

Wahey happy candlebum!

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:59, Reply)

"The picture is ambiguous because it looks like a bum, but is not"
(genuine quote from the annotation in a student sketchbook)
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:01, Reply)

haaaaaahaha

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:12, Reply)

Yes please
I am still at work; I'm genuinely too knackered to cycle home.
(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 19:58, Reply)

red bull gives you wings.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:01, Reply)

Perfect!

(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:03, Reply)

wings bad teeth and a whiff of cough syrup
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:08, Reply)

Oh dear oh dear :(
Sorry to hear about your experiment, too.

Cycle via cake?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:20, Reply)

Lampers!
How you doing?
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:20, Reply)

Absolutely fucking tip top.
Though have fallen off the wagon regards diet and exercise, my legs are no longer toned and are getting chubby again. Back on tomorrow.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:22, Reply)

Yay! glad you're on your uppers : )

( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:28, Reply)

Well, I've messaged loads of people on OKCupid and not had a single reply back, not one.
This is like when I buy a lottery ticket and think I'm going to be a millionare and have loads of money to spend frivilously, but then when I don't win, I'm a tiny bit gutted and very dishearteneded. Or when I play Roulette every 3 months and blow the entire £20 I put in thinking that I could become a billionare with that sort of investment.

I can only conclude one of two things out of this.

1) I'm not a terrible person, just an unloveable one.
2) The girl of my dreams doesn't use the internet, which is odd, 'cus I'm into internet stuff.

None of those makes sense because I'm totally awesome in so many ways.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:21, Reply)

keep going
someone will answer. People have even answered me
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:23, Reply)

What have you listed as your hobbies and interests on your dating profile?
We could invent some new ones for you, that might help.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:23, Reply)

Totally deleting this in 20 minutes.
[gone]
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:25, Reply)

you need a USP
btw, what do you put in your first messages? If it's about massaging feet with cocks, that ain't good
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:28, Reply)

What will a portable memory stick do for Gonz's profile?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:29, Reply)

unique selling point, silly
or are you hilariously misunderstanding?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:32, Reply)

I think I'm just misunderstanding, accidentally on purpose.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:34, Reply)

I tend to personailise it depending on their profile, normally something funny based on their interests.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:00, Reply)

your profile or the link?
yours seems very well put together
mines a bit shit
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:29, Reply)

Maybe there is too much information in it though?
Maybe ladies read it and can't think what to say in reply, as there is so much information already there?

(I don't know, as the mind of the woman is a mystery).
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:31, Reply)

nah, go for more things
they'd want to ask about. Most profiles sound about the same
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:32, Reply)

Women love humour.
And any woman who doesn't, isn't worth having.
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:43, Reply)

this

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:45, Reply)

Lovely pic and profile : )

( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:30, Reply)

OHHH OHH OHHH I GOT A REPLY !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:40, Reply)

Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:43, Reply)

yay!!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:44, Reply)

Yaaaaaaaay!

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:03, Reply)

better than what happened to me on okcupid, bloke asked for my number then deleted his profile
/forever alone

You ARE totally awesome in so many ways, we really need to find a way to get you into a victoria secret fashion show, I just know you'll leave with an angel
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:26, Reply)

i like OKCupid
i met one of my bestest friends on it
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:31, Reply)

+ he deleted his profile shortly after asking an American for their number.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:31, Reply)

I am horrible because I am human.
Alt: Iced tea, strong proper tea (english breakfast) with milk, ice cream float.
Relaxing drinks are Earl Grey or warm milk with vanilla sugar.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:21, Reply)

after reading this quickly my mind processed (breakfast) with milk as breast milk
how do you make your iced tea?
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:31, Reply)

I buy Lipton's, in bottles.
The lemon flavour. I remember you posted a link for sweet tea, it looked lovely. I might make some.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:34, Reply)

eurgh
you must try your own, a large pitcher, gallon size maybe with 2 cups sugar in
9 lipton tea bags, boiled in the water, let cool a bit, pour over sugar, stir til disolved
add ice, let disolve and stir
fill cold water
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:02, Reply)

Hmm. For the summer, I think.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:09, Reply)

really, lipton bottle lemon tea is horrid
you guys are very particular about your hot tea
I'm particular about sweet tea
that stuff is vile
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:14, Reply)

I really like it.
Proper stuff must be lovely.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:18, Reply)

sorry love, if you like it then you like it
I just don't
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:37, Reply)

Yes you are a horrible person
The memory of you running Battered off the internet is still fresh.
I'm horrible on so many different levels, yesterday I made a nine year old cry at his very own birthday party, there's no stopping me !!1!
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:24, Reply)

Haha!
Did you steal his girlfriend?
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:31, Reply)

He seemed to get upset at being teased for being gay for his teacher, soft as shite he is
needs that kicked out of him pronto
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:34, Reply)

I'm a terrible cunt
A friend told me about a would-be suitor had a protruding jaw. Instead of sympathy my response was 'oh Planet of the Apes'

Alt: i do love peppermint coffee frappucinos, but currently my favourite is the cocktail in my hand. It's a case of love the one you're with
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:31, Reply)

For some strange reason one of my cats, (I suspect Gilbert), has peed and pooed on my bathroom floor.
He's never done that before : /
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:44, Reply)

Sounds like a symtom of routine cat cancer
I hope you've been keeping up with the insurance scheme
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:56, Reply)

No insurance.
If they're ill then they get put down. They've had a good innings.
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:58, Reply)

I too am reliant on the trusty 'insurance' of a bag and a couple of bricks

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:02, Reply)

I figure I can stretch financially to a lethal injection from the vet.
We've been together around 13 years so it's the least I can do.
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:04, Reply)

You're not thinking BGB, save yourself a few hundred quid and home euthanize them

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:09, Reply)

A bit extreme I know, but this should do the trick
www.jamescartercomedy.com/
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:10, Reply)

Piston_Broke Pest Control.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:14, Reply)

It's the equilalent of nuking it from orbit

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:16, Reply)

I can't watch that.
Please don't make me. *whimpers*
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:14, Reply)

I just can't be as much of a cunt as you Rory.
God knows I'd like to be.
( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:12, Reply)

:D

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:17, Reply)

don't tell Biscuit or Benji.
Hey diddle-diddle
The cat did a piddle
All over the bathroom mat.
The little dog laughed, to see such fun
And he piddled all over the cat.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 20:59, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:00, Reply)

:)

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:03, Reply)

*sigh*

(berk, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:00, Reply)

:(

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:03, Reply)

She doesn't understand you like I do Jeff.

( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:05, Reply)

I know Blousie.
Do you think if you'd left the seat up, Gilbert would have made it to the toilet?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:06, Reply)

He pooed right by the loo, bless him.

( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:07, Reply)

And had a slash by the bath?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:11, Reply)

Yup!

( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:12, Reply)

Gilbert is Norman Bates
aicmfp
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:13, Reply)

Bob is Master Bates
AICMFP
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:16, Reply)

you see that shit gilbert did? that's your dinner that is, you are going to eat that.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:17, Reply)

Welcome, to History Today.
You know a pair of pants with some cack in it? That's you that is. That's you wearing your best ever pair.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:20, Reply)

I like this

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Feb 2011, 21:04, Reply)